seize the day

Jaehyun was a man of many words, everybody including Chaeyeon knew about this of course. So she's not really surprised about how he's so chatty today, even if he was feeling nervous he still talked the way he did around her before. Like nothing's changed, and Chaeyeon hopes it stays at that. Whatever happens after this little date, Chaeyeon wishes they'd at least keep their friendship intact.

As he talks and explains and lists all the reasons why he's so into her, Chaeyeon can't help but smile. The pizza was getting cold and the ice in their Colas were almost completely melted, but Jaehyun kept talking and Chaeyeon listened all the while as he did. 

"That's how it started," he finally concludes. He places his hands on the table and fidgets with the tissue he used. "During your trip to Japan, when we were chatting over summer last year. And here we are now," he smiles, albeit shyly, and Chaeyeon smiles back only because she knows it takes a lot of willpower and guts to be honest with the person you've been having a secret crush on for almost a year, and that crush is also your best friend's ex and your close friend.

Chaeyeon's thinking about a million things at once. She's flattered alright, she's always bragged about her beauty with her friends in a joking manner and people think she's confident with her looks but really, she's not. She second guesses herself all the time, she puts up a brave front in the morning but at night she is curled on her bed, lying there as alone as one can ever be. She keeps mostly to herself, even though she says she has tons of friends to share her problems with. But they're never really there, not like how she's always there for them. Always. 

She's a messy pile of insecurities and doubts, nobody stays long with her, nobody goes the extra mile or would even cross a puddle for someone like Jung Chaeyeon. 

Nobody. 

Nobody until Jaehyun. 

"This is risky." she says, and she regrets it the instant she said it. A week ago, Jaehyun had been talking to her about that. What they were doing, the feelings he was harboring, wasn't it all very selfish? 

His expression goes blank for a moment before a frown dawns his features, letting her see just a fraction of the mixed emotions that were brewing inside of him this very minute. "I - I know this is wrong, but I don't know what els