Chapter 1: And here i thought they’d ended up together now im sad s a d

Chapter 1: omg ))):
i thought they would end up together )):
this story is so beautiful anywaaayyy

Chapter 1: Chapter 1: Gosh, I thought he loved her. How could he leave her like that? What’s the point in saying those 3 words “I Love You” when he might not actually mean it or hold onto it in the end??? It was so heart wrenching. I’m so disappointed in Sehun.

Chapter 1: I love who her real love is. Sehun said before that she is his sanctuary. That doesn't really mean that he loves her. He just occupied with some feeling of her the only one who have his grandma figure. He's depending on her after his grandma's death.

Chapter 1: wAIT WHAT?!? I DIDN'T EXPECT THE ENDING
I have a bad feeling when yeoreum said that the cake shaped like their favorite thing >< it turned out true asdfghjkl >< it's so sad that they didn't end up together ><

Chapter 1: This was really short! Not just the length of the entire fic but also the length of your paragraphs, which I really appreciate since I have so many other one shots to read OTL. The ending was so heart crushing though, and super shocking... :(

I feel like there isn't enough development between Sehun and OC. The change in Sehun was almost sudden and abrupt. It would have been better if you built up their relationship over time, not just all of a sudden with him holding her hand etc. The tenses were in consistent too -- sometimes it would be in present tense and the next moment it would be in past. You have to write in just one tense the entire story (unless it's a flashback or fast forward into the future), so that it doesn't confuse the readers. Also, I feel like the use of the prompt wasn't apt, like it was unnecessary? I won't be taking "points" out for that though, don't worry. :)

So yeah, thank you for joining Blossom Roads and I hope you learnt much from this writing contest. I hope that you won't be too disheartened by my critiques instead keep working hard to improve. Good luck in your writing!

xoxo

Chapter 1: wuttttt? this is not what i was expecting

Chapter 1: This is so beautiful. But i'm so sad that they didn't end up with each other :(

Chapter 1: Niceone authornim...I really like this story