HANEUL

"You can wait here, make yourself comfortable," i asked him to sit down in my living room as i went in to my room to change.

I change my clothes with a plain black pullover and a long comfortable grey lounge pants. I took my small towel to dry my tip of hair, and took a bigger one for Jungkook. 

Jungkook is so wet, and messy. Fortunately, i have some man hoodies and sweaters in my wardrobe because i love to wear man hoodies. I took a maroon colored hoodie with me, i think it will fit Jungkook. 

I came out of my room and meet him outside. He's looking around my place and seems to be enjoying every corner of my place. 

"Wear this for a while," he turned his back to me, knowing my presence. "you can do your laundry and dry it there and I'll cook the ramyeon" 

I pointed to the laundry room beside the bathroom. I also gave him the towel and the hoodie i took earlier. 

"Thank you," he took his necessities from my hands. I was about to leave to the kitchen when he calmly called me again. I turned back.

"Is this your boyfriend's hoodie?" his face was full of question marks. This is ridiculous. My eyebrows furrowed but i was holding my laughter back. 

"I've never had one," I answered him shortly, and make my way to the kitchen. I saw his small giggle through the corner of my eyes as he walks to the laundry room.

I started to cook the ramyeon, and also made two cups of hot chocolate to warm us up during the heavy rain. The rain is still pouring hard outside, i really love this weather. I look out to the window and sweep my gaze to those beautiful rain drops. I just can't take my eyes off of the beautiful water dropping outside the window. I always think that rain is a way for the sky to communicate to the earth. Just how much i love to stare at the sky, it felt so far away. But raindrops is the easiest way for me to actually reach the sky. 

"the ramyeon is ready i guess?" I startled. I was lost in the rain and didn't even remember that I'm here with Jungkook. I was nearly dropped the chocolate to the floor. 

"Uh sorry i was.. just staring outside." I turn off the stove and serve the cooked ramyeon to the bowls. I saw Jungkook was so confused, like he wanted to help but still not knowing what to do. 

"Just sit down there, I'll be ready in seconds" i said. I saw there's a glimpse of relieved in his eyes. I giggled inside my heart. He's so cute, like a lost little puppy.

A minute later, we both are sitting face to face on the dining table. With two bowls of ramyeon and two cups of hot chocolate on the table, we both are sitting quietly. With him facing his bowl, and me sipping my hot chocolate facing the window to see the rain. I honestly hate an awkward situation and a dead air while i was with someone else. But either way, I don't know what to say. But I don't want him to think that I'm an awkward nerd, when in fact I'm not. Most of the time I just love to spent time with myself, but when I'm with someone else i know that i should prevent dead air coming in between.

"Do you really love the rain?" He finally open up the conversation.

"One of my favorite things," i answered him and look back to him. "how do you know?"

"You stare at the rain all the time, for a long period of time. You seemed to be enjoying the rain so much." he explains. "On my car, while you were cooking, and just earlier, you're staring at the rain all the time. I saw it." He giggles as he caught me redhanded for staring at the rain. 

"Rain is so beautiful, don't you think?" I finally could throw away the awkwardness and the dead air between us.

"I'm not really into rain. My brain stucks when it's raining, like it suddenly needs a rest." His answer disappoints me. "I haven't seen the beauty of rain, so far. Why do you think it's beautiful? Do you have a certain memories with someone related to the rain?"

"No, it's not like that!" 

"So, why?" He asked me as excitement and curiosity growing in his eyes. 

"When i was just a child, you know that most child are afraid of the dark sky and thunder and rain, right? So was i. I was so afraid of those things. I turned into a total crybaby when it's raining," 

He's listening so quitely like he doesn't even want to interrupt me. 

"But then when i grow up, and had problems in life, i know it myself that i need my time to ease the pain away. And how i do it is either crying, or showing my dark side, or even scream the pain away."

"And eventually, i realized that it goes the same to the sky. As i grew up, i realize that even the sky needs to ease its pain away. Thunder is how it screams, rain is how it cries, and the dark cloud is how much heavy it carries." 

"Rain is the only way for the sky to turn bright again after its dark side appears. It goes the same to us, when we're having so much burden, we need to relieve it away to cure- in my case, i cry. And the sky, when it carries too much dark clouds, it surely needs to drop it away to uncover the beautiful sunlight hiding behind it."

He's still listening to me deeply, with his eyes locked with mine. He doesn't even say a word, he's really listening carefully to every words that i say and i could feel it.

"I prefer the sky, and everything in it," He finally giving me his response as he knows I'm done with my elaboration.

I'm the one listening now.

"Sky is beyond every beauty I've ever seen in the whole world. You can see clouds looking like a puffy little puppy today, and the next day you see the white wavy clouds spread over the sky, looking like an ocean. It's so beautifully unpredictable."

"You can see the maroonish-colored sky around the sun ring during the sunrise. And the next few hours all you see is only a wide blue scenery full of white beautiful jewelries on it, sky with its clouds. Then, you'll see these lilac-oranges sight during the sunset to wrap your day up. Not to mention, it will give you the chance to see things beyond the atmosphere during the starry night."

"And the most important is that, all of those things happened in a single day. And it will never be the same each day, it will change all the time, and will always serves you suprises each days."

He sips his hot chocolate as he finished his explaination. I was so speechless, his words were very beautiful. He perfectly describes the perfection of the sky, and how much he loves it.

"But it's beyond our limit, and it's unreachable" I answered.

"That's what you think. For most people, they think of the sky as an unreachable imaginary roof that only covers them everyday. But for me," He paused, reaching his pocket to take his phone out. He pressed his passcode and turned his phone to me on the next while. 

I'm so amazed with what i saw on his screen. It was his photo gallery. His photo gallery was full of the sky photos, and they're really looking beautiful in every different shapes and colors.

He then continued, "this is how i reach the sky. I know this isn't enough to actually feel it's beauty. But because i know that sky changes all the time, and my memories also fading all the time. So, i captured every beauty it gives me"

He then put his phone back to his pocket, leaving me amazed. I didn't really expect that Jeon Jungkook is this kind of guy that is poetic, and has beautiful words.

"That was beautiful," i shortly responded in amusement.

"I bet you never realize how beautiful the sky is," He said to me, and i nodded. "I knew it. The sky is up there but people don't really realize how beautiful it is."

The sky is up there but people don't really realize how beautiful it is.

"Don't you think our topic is getting very serious right now?" I giggled as i bring back my focus to my ramyeon.

"It's nice to talk about that kind of thing," He smiles warmly. "I'm not really able to talk about it to my friends, they're going to think about me as a little child" 

What? I can't believe he's turning from 10 to 0 in a minute now. He's implicitly just saying that talking about what he likes to his friends will only hurt his image. Major turn off, Jeon Jungkook.

I only nod my head as we both continue our ramyeon. 

Dead air comes again, but I don't mind it at all. My mood of talking to him nicely is already taken down as he started to be a pride-orientated guy again in his implicit words. Suddenly, the laundry machine alarm is ringing, signing that his shirt is done and ready to wear. He stared at me, asking for excuse, and stood up.

"Hey are you done with your ramyeon? I'm going to wash the sink," i shouted a bit as he's already pretty distanced from me.

"I'm done," he answered from afar.

I took our bowls and cups and started to wash it up. My mind flew away to the scene of me and him talking about the clouds, sky, and the rain. He was so friendly back then that i started to feel like making him my friend. But the moment he dropped the bomb, i feel like i wanted to kick him out of my apartment just as soon as possible. It might be just a simple problem to him, but i really don't like it. 

"I think I should go now," he said behind me. I turn back to him. "Is it okay if i bring this a while? I have to walk to the parking lot and i got no umbrella"

"Oh, it's alright. Just hand it back when you remember," i answer him as i walked to his direction, about to walk him to the doorstep.

"And," he paused. "thank you for the lunch, i really appreciate it,"

"I was just paying you back for driving me home!" i laughed. "Don't get things wrong, okay? I didn't mean anything else," He nods, making his way to the doorstep, walking behind me.

"We're even now," i said. Implicitly saying 'go away, I have no more reasons to do you any good'

He then saying his last goodbye before he finally left my apartment. I look around my apartment to check if there's something he left behind, but there's nothing. I sighed in relieve. At least I don't have to meet him anymore for a while. Guess today is enough to at least knowing him. I don't need to know more about him or even getting in any further to his life. 

——————

It's been a week since I haven't seen Jungkook. I've been busy these past few days, doing my assignments, paced up some subjects in order to get good grades. And to my relieve, Jungkook doesn't even bother to call me.

I talked to Ha Ru a few days ago, telling her about what happened between me and Jungkook after he picked me up in the campus last week. Ha Ru squealed in excitement as she heard my story in details. But her excitement fades away as i told her that i still couldn't see him in the way she does. She expressed her disappointment as i said Jungkook is still the guy i used to think he is.

Haneul-ah! I know you don't like him, but this is not a big deal. You shouldn't hate him too much, what if you eventually fall for him too much? 

Haneul-aaaah!! Being self centered was his bad side before you guys met! You spent just a day with him, you can't always judge him from what you saw in a short period of time! What if he suddenly changes into a dreamy prince with attitude? You would choke to your own words!

The words she said to me was bothering my mind for the next few days. I wonder if he would change, i wonder if i could see him the way other people do. 

Just as much as i think about what she said earlier, i think it's a dead end anyway. Ha Ru is not gonna help him in any way. My thought about him is his burden of proof. I would never give him such a give away chance to enter my inner circle easily. I have difficulties on trusting people and letting them in to my life straight forwardly. But once they're inside my inner circle and is a part of my comfort zone, my whole life is theirs as well.

Speaking of my campus , I've been working on some big project lately that I haven't even once attended the extra interest class, the class that I'm in with Jungkook. Jungkook and I studied in different departments. I'm not sure about his, but mine is Humanities. So we can't see each other in class frequently since it's only an extra class, and I'm glad for it anyway.

It's already 4 PM and I'm still forming a blanket cocoon on my bed. There will be an annual performing art festival tonight from the Performing Art Department. I'm going with some of my friends, and of course my best friend Ha Ru. I might be a bibiliophilia, and mostly a loner. But i love to a