Hoseok lets out a shameless catcall upon walking into the break room that morning, one hand in his pocket and the other held loosely around a Starbucks cup (as a slight error in communication, his cashier has simply written ‘’ instead of Hoseok on the side). “Nice ‘do, rookie.”

                  Jungkook, dead fish eyes and all, looks up from where he’s standing by the microwave. The intern’s dark hair is swept into a fresh, gelled-up style, exposing his forehead and eliciting a pampered rich boy aura. It’s certainly a step away from the usual scowl-under-bangs look.

                  “What’s the occasion?” Hoseok asks, sliding a chair out from the table. “Did you just graduate from high school?”

                  “I’m twenty-three,” he says.

                  “Wow, it was a joke. Lighten up, you clown.” The secretary gulps down his drink as Jungkook reaches for a sandwich in the microwave. “We’ve got a bunch of fossils working here, can you blame me if I wanna pick on our freshest meat?”

                  Jungkook wraps his breakfast in a thick layer of paper towels. “It’s only 9AM and you’re already on break, Hoseok?”

                  Hoseok lets out a nervous laugh. “… It’s a slow morning!”

                  “I’d like to introduce a proposition.” The intern strides over to the coffee machines when one of them beeps, signalling a fresh brew. “I’ve been measuring Sergeant Min’s reactions to my coffee over the past week and deducted that he usually has one of two expressions. If there’s less than three teaspoons of honey in his drink, then he becomes grumpy for that entire day… grumpier than usual, anyway. If there’s just around three teaspoons, then he’s indifferent and less totalitarian.”

                  “Okay,” Hoseok says slowly. “What’s your proposition, then?”

                  “I want you to predict what would happen if I added a bit more honey than usual.” Jungkook takes Yoongi’s mug and promptly squeezes a large amount of honey into it.

                  “Whoa, easy there!” The other male perches both feet onto his chair, as if he saw a mouse or something. “The sarge said he doesn’t like his drink too sweet, right? Wouldn’t too much honey make him grumpy too?”

                  “Too much sugar, perhaps,” he says, stirring the coffee. “But honey seems to have… peculiar effects on him. Do come with me and observe.” Jungkook walks out of the break room with the mug in hand and Hoseok has never been more compelled to follow.

                  They find the sergeant in the conference room, staring at the board where they keep their city maps. The best time to catch a prey is when they’re distracted, it seems.

                  “Sergeant,” Jungkook calls. “Your coffee.”

                  Yoongi mutters something about his liver before grasping the mug, taking one thoughtful sip. The other two stare at him, judging for any reactions. Jungkook is probably a couple inches too close to his shoulder and Hoseok’s just recording the moment on Snapchat. They both flinch when he faces them, only to pick up a folder left on the podium beside him. “Will one of you call Detective Kim? I have another case to assign, and—”

                  “HI, I’M HERE.” Taehyung slides into the room wearing everything but his shoes. His socks are horribly blinding, for something as pink as they are. “We have a case?!”

                  “Where on earth are your shoes?” Jungkook asks, staring at his feet.

                  “Uh, what on earth is that hairdo?” Taehyung says right back. “Did you graduate from high school or something?”

                  Hoseok lets out a guffaw. “That’s what I said! Or maybe he just won prom king.”

                  “Maybe he’s dressing up to visit his nana—!”

                  “If you must know,” Jungkook deadpans, no evident sense of humour on his face. “I just came back from a relative’s funeral.”

                  The two buffoons stare at him with their mouths half-open, somewhere on the verge between total shock and impending guilt. Yoongi clears his throat after a moment or two, pulling their attention back to him. “The case, gentlemen.”

                  “Right!” Taehyung regains his usual pep and starts beaming. “Is it another B&E? A burglary? Arson? Treason?” he gasps. “A MURDER?”

                  “Almost.” Yoongi flips open the folder, exposing several photos of a bloody crime scene. A couple red splatters on a linoleum floor, as well as broken glass windows and a trashed store front. It’s nothing extremely graphic, but Hoseok squeaks and moves back several feet anyway. “Two individuals broke into Mr. Lee’s convenience store last night and stole about twenty-thousand-won in cash and food. Mr. Lee caught them on his private CCTV and tried to apprehend them after calling authorities. He unfortunately suffered several stab wounds, but he’s regained consciousness at the hospital.”

                  “Sick,” Taehyung says, briefing himself with the files. Jungkook peers over his shoulder with a curious eye. “I mean, not sick, it’s super tragic. So we’re charging them with breaking and entering, second-degree burglary, and maybe battery?”

                  “Well, there’s a catch.” Yoongi pauses to drink his coffee (Hoseok and Jungkook tense up). “There are two culprits, but only one of them attacked Mr. Lee, so one gets the assault charge and the other gets the B&E. We just don’t know which one is which.”

                  The ace detective frowns. “If there were cameras, wouldn’t we see clearly who did what? CCTV these days record in 720p or higher, y’know.”

                  Yoongi rubs his temple in mild distress. “They’re twins, detective. Actual, ing, criminal twins. Of course they’d have masks on at the scene of the crime, but their figures are identical so it’s difficult to tell them apart, especially on the CCTV.”

                  “Wow.” By this point, Taehyung’s eyes are practically sparkling. “Sorry, I’m so excited. You’re assigning me this case?”

                  “Both of you.” The sergeant flicks a finger towards Jungkook. “We’ve held both twins in detention, so whenever you’re ready to interrogate them they’re there. Crack ‘em open and see what you can find out.”

                  “… Oh, right.” Taehyung side-eyes his intern before poising into his usual salute. “Won’t disappoint you, sir!”

                  “Mm-hm.” Yoongi downs the rest of his coffee and starts making his way back into the office before stopping short at Hoseok’s side. “Nice tie,” he murmurs.

                  The secretary’s eyes almost bulge out of their sockets. “Uh, thanks?”

                  “You’re welcome.” And with that, he leaves the room.

                  Jungkook and Hoseok exchange looks of sheer disbelief (Taehyung’s too busy with the case folder to notice). “I don’t know what that honey did to him,” the latter whispers, “but you gotta do it again.”

--

                  “How are you approaching this case, detective?” Jungkook asks once they’re both standing in a narrow hall of the precinct. “Should we get a testimony from Mr. Lee?”

                  “Since they’re already here, we should try to get as much info from the suspects as possible!” Taehyung opens the door to a small room, which is largely empty aside for some chairs and a one-way observational window. On the other side of the glass is a typical interrogation room, encased in concrete walls with a dim light. Their first suspect sits in that room chained to a table. “To tell them apart, the arresting officer put bands on them. This twin’s wearing a green band, so he must be Mr. Choi Jiyong.”

                  Jungkook peers through the window. “He seems rather ragged,” he says, referring to the suspect’s shaggy hair and bloodshot eyes.

                  “Well, they probably didn’t sleep while we kept them in detention last night. Anyway—” Taehyung hands his intern the file. “I’ll show you how to play bad cop. With guys like these, you’ve got to all the info out of them and make ‘em weep. Watch and learn.”

                  Jungkook raises a brow as the other male leaves to appear in the interrogation room. The intern himself takes a seat and carefully observes their interaction.

                  “Good morning to you,” the detective says after he closes the door behind him. Taehyung stands on the other side of the table, back facing the window. The suspect looks at him with a stoic expression, back curled like an old turtle. “I’m Detective Kim and—” He suddenly slams his hands onto the table. “Where were you the night of Mr. Lee’s store robbery?!”

                  Jungkook groans. “You know where he was…”

                  “You will tell me everything, or I’ll—!”

                  “Okay, I’ll tell you everything!” the suspect shrieks, holding his head in his hands. “I did it, I’m the one who stabbed that old man.”

                  Taehyung stares, clearing his throat after a moment. “Um, okay. Excuse me, I’ll be right back.” He leaves to join Jungkook in backroom again and looks visibly flustered. “Well, that was easy.”

                  The younger male glances at Mr. Choi Jiyong with narrowed eyes. The suspect doesn’t seem anxious at all, despite confessing to assault and robbery. “Perhaps he’s had a change of conscience?”

                  “Nah, it was definitely because of my badass-ery.” Taehyung waves it off with a chuckle. “Alright, let’s close up the case!”

                  Jungkook stands up. “Detective, I suggest talking to the other twin before we do.”

                  “Why? We already have a confession.”

                  “I highly recommend it,” he says, staring so deep into Taehyung’s face that the detective eventually whimpers.

                  “Okay, back off—geez, whatever happened to personal space.” The two of them depart for another interrogation room, where Taehyung intends to repeat his ‘bad cop’ ploy to the other twin, Mr. Choi Jaeyoung. He dons an orange band on his wrist.

                  “I DID IT!” screams their second suspect as soon as the detective opens the door. “I STABBED HIM! I STABBED THAT OLD MAN! PUT ME IN JAIL!”

                  Taehyung gawks at him for a hard second before excusing himself.

                  He runs back to Jungkook in an exhausted pant, pale as a sheet. “Th—They both confessed,” he wheezes, “to the same crime?!”

                  The intern deadpans, “one of them is lying.”

                  “Well, no !”

                  “It’s most likely a conspiracy,” Jungkook says. “Having both of them confess will certainly delay prosecution, and we can’t give them the same punishment… What should we do?”

                  Taehyung catches his breath to stare at the wall, hand perched against his chin as a bad Sherlock imitation. “As a victim, Mr. Lee is too close to this case and anything he says won’t help much. We don’t have proof of them planning it beforehand, either. I think… we should interview friends or family who have a better sense of the twins’ personalities.”

                  “Alright. Should I gather their contacts and see who to call in?”

                  He shakes his head. “No, I’ll do that. Can you look over the CCTV and see if you can differentiate them? Your eyes are probably better than mine.”

                  Jungkook blinks slowly and then nods. “Roger.”

--

                  Returning to his desk in the main office, the intern boots up his laptop. “Hoseok,” he calls over his shoulder, “can you give me the CCTV footage from the twin burglary case?”

                  “Got it!” Hoseok attempts to slide over on his office chair before getting caught on a wire snaking across the floor and falling face first. The other staff look at him once before resuming their work.

                  “… Are you alright?” Jungkook asks when the secretary gets up and wobbles over to him.

                  “Never mind that,” Hoseok wheezes, handing him a USB drive. “The coffee you made for the sergeant this morning did some weird , man. He hasn’t yelled at anything all day, and I think he even smiled once!”

                  The intern stares at him. “That is indeed horrifying.”

                  “Right? I dunno, I don’t mind the peace and quiet, but—” Hoseok shivers and rubs his arms. “It’s so in’ weird.”

                  “I’ll investigate further into that matter once we finish up this case.” Jungkook inserts the USB into his computer and locates the surveillance footage from last night. Once he starts playing the video, his eyes shift over to where Hoseok is still standing, a few inches behind him. “I do apologize, but this is confidential information. I can’t let you watch.”

                  “Aw, come on.” The secretary perches his hands on his hips. “I never get to see any of the action! It’s always desk work for me.”

                  “You’re not a police officer.” Jungkook fishes his headphones from a drawer. “And I assume you don’t want to watch someone getting stabbed. The victim reportedly lost a great amount of bloo—”

                  “OKAY, OKAY, I GOT IT!” Hoseok screeches, covering his ears and fleeing back to his desk.

                  Getting settled in his seat, Jungkook finds the most concerning part of the long footage: the moment when the glass windows of Mr. Lee’s convenience store are smashed, and two figures stalk inside to steal various items. Both of the culprits wore identical tracksuits and masks, and as far as he’s concerned Jungkook can’t see any major differences between the two. One of them scavenged the entire store while the other attempted to break into the cash register. At some point or another, they switched places.

                  About an hour into the theft, Mr. Lee appears on screen with what looks like a golf club. He swung it the best he could for an older man, but as soon as there’s an opening, one of the twins punctured his side with a small razor knife. They fled almost immediately afterwards with the stolen goods.

                  Jungkook rewinds that bit of the tape several times, squinting at the blurry resolution. There’s nothing that really sets them apart, aside from—

                  “Their bare hands,” he mutters. “Sergeant?”

                  Yoongi, who was walking past his desk, flinches. “Uh, yes?”

                  Jungkook looks up, eyes gleaming. “Do twins have identical fingerprints?”