It’s December 31^st.

                  The date’s been ingrained in his mind for a while, or however long ago he decided to procrastinate and stare out the window instead. The streets outside are laden with snow, and yet people are still out partying as they count the minutes until midnight. By definition, Taehyung himself is also at a party; it’s just hosted at work, by his co-workers in the presence of work that suggests he should be working.

                  His productivity levels see an immediate decrease when someone plays Jingle Bell Rock across the office for the nth time, and when Hoseok throws another bundle of mistletoe at him. There are wreaths and other similar ornaments just about everywhere in the room and Taehyung would be damned if it were Christmas; unfortunately, his department decided to hold a late Christmas bash and New Year’s Eve party on the same night, in the middle of the goddamn work week.

                  Part of the blame can be attributed to Hoseok, who takes up secretarial and IT duties as well as being the sole member of the esteemed Party Planning Committee; Hoseok’s mom was sick for the past week, so he tossed his party planning duties to Namjoon from Human resources and, well— let’s just say Namjoon from Human Resources probably can’t tell his left foot from his right even if his life depended on it.

                  Taehyung wouldn’t mind the festivities so much if his birthday wasn’t yesterday on the 30^th, because no one really seemed to remember. Considering that he’s a detective in the town’s only police department, it’s a given that everyone would be busy this time of year; but it’s hard to forgive things when the only thing that wishes you well is the AI on your phone (thanks, Siri).

                  “Detective Kim,” comes Yoongi’s usual low growl as he passes by with a cup of cheap coffee. “Briefing in the conference room in five. Gather HR and IT as well, there’s important info for tonight.”

                  Taehyung, clearly not in high spirits, turns to look at his boss. “Anything else you’d like to say to me, sergeant?” he asks, feeling hopeful. “Like… you know. Something about my age, or a celebration of some sort—?”

                  Yoongi uses his free hand to flick his arm. “Enough of your mindless babbling and hurry up. Don’t forget to call the captain.”

--

                  A humble six minutes later, the staff find themselves huddled in the conference room where Sergeant Min Yoongi stands, in an iron-pressed suit riddled with pins declaring his position in the office. He writes notes on the whiteboard while the rest of his squadron straggles in.

                  Taehyung slinks into the seat beside Hoseok, who’s languidly chewing on a ham sub and has half a mind to offer him some. “Thanks,” Taehyung murmurs, ripping off a piece of bread. “So what’ve you been doing all day?”

                  “Nothin’ much,” Hoseok replies, leaning back in his seat. “Just waiting for New Year’s, like every other civilian. You, on the other hand—”

                  “Work, work, work,” he sighs. “I mean, I usually love working, but not paperwork. I haven’t been out in the field in ages. And besides, I— I feel off today.”

                  “Gonorrhea?”

                  “No!” Taehyung’s about to defend his reproductive system when Yoongi slams down on the podium, pulling the chatter to a complete halt.

                  Their sergeant looks around the room until his gaze lands on Taehyung. “Where’s the captain?”

                  “Couldn’t find him. He’s probably out helping the local children again.”

                  “Alright peasants,” he says. “We’ll have to go on without him. I know today’s a special night for some of you, but we don’t stop working until next week. The new interns are coming in tonight and— yes, I know—” He waits until everyone stops groaning. “ty timing, but I trust you all to make them feel acquainted. Brief them. One is going to HR— Namjoon, that’s you, pay attention you nut bag—and the other will be put under the guidance of Detective Kim.”

                  Taehyung perks up at the news. Yet another disciple he’ll be able to take under his wing, or another desk slave; one of the two. “What’s the name, sergeant?”

                  “Jeon,” Yoongi reads off his clipboard. “He’ll be here later tonight. For now, we’ll have the officers on patrol duty. There have been reports of drunkards wandering the area, be on the lookout for those. They’ve been apparently assaulting women, so while it’s not recommended, I won’t chide any of you for using your guns tonight. We can probably mask the gunshots for fireworks.”

                  “You’re terrible, sergeant!” someone shouts from the back.

                  “Just don’t kill anyone.” He slams the podium a couple more times. “Alright, team. Off to work—!”

                  “Um, sergeant!” Taehyung raises his hand as if imitating a preschooler. “Don’t you have anything else to add?”

                  Yoongi tosses a roll of his eyes before sighing, “… and a happy belated birthday, Detective Kim. Off to work.”

--

                  “Tae,” Hoseok beckons after everyone’s returned to business as usual. His hands are hidden behind his back and he has on this goofy grin that Taehyung can only identify with mischief. “Close your eyes.”

                  Taehyung merely squints at him. “… You know, as a trained officer, they’ve taught us in police school that you never blink at anything, even—”

                  “CLOSE YOUR DAMN EYES.” Hoseok yaps, placing a small package on his desk after he does so. “There. Happy belated, buddy. And merry Christmas— and happy new year.”

                  He opens his eyes to a crudely wrapped box (it’s been sealed with strawberry chewing gum) and practically beams. “Wow, thanks. I mean, it’s only a day late, but—”

                  “Shut up, you know how my mom’s in the hospital,” Hoseok chides. “Open it.”

                  He carefully pries it open to a bubble-wrapped pistol of some sort, and upon further inspection does Taehyung realize it’s a prop Taser. “Well, would you look at that,” he drawls playfully. “You got me, a grown man, a toy for my birthday. This’ll definitely help me put bad guys behind bars.”

                  The other male throws a slap across his shoulder. “You might thank me for it later, head.”

                  “Yeah, whatever. Thanks, best friend.” Taehyung offers him a curt laugh before stowing the gift away, should Yoongi get on his case about unlicensed weapons.

                  “So how about ‘em new interns, huh?” Hoseok slides his rear across the top of Taehyung’s desk, subsequently pushing some files onto the floor. “Think they’ll actually be cool this time?

                  “Doubt it,” Taehyung mutters while glancing out the window. “I’m more concerned about the drunks the sergeant mentioned. Why can’t women—or anyone, for that matter, stay safe on our streets? It’s New Year’s eve, for god’s sakes.”

                  Hoseok lets out a snort. “As usual, Kim Taehyung never fails us with his heroic sense of justice— you’re such a narc.”

                  “This is law enforcement,” he retorts. “Of course I’m a narc. It’s been my dream to be a detective since I was a kid. All I wanna do with my life is put away criminals.”

                  “You’re not going to get very far with that ty paperwork,” Yoongi’s voice echoes from behind and as Taehyung whips around, he spots his sergeant nudging the fallen files with his shoe. “Your job isn’t always gunning down a criminal or interrogating a suspect. You’re at your desk ninety-percent of the time, and I expect you’ll learn how to spell ‘felony’ correctly or so god help me, I’ll demote your to parking duty.”

                  Taehyung’s face pales as he nods. “Y-Yes, sir,” he squeaks, reaching to pick up the papers.

                  “Anyways, I’m running out to check on patrol. I’ll be back in a half hour, most likely—” Yoongi pauses to give Hoseok a onceover. “… Your tie is disgusting, fix it. The captain’s returned from wherever he’s been,” he continues without pause. “So report to him with any changes. I’ll be back, don’t muck up.”

                  “SIR, YES SIR!” Taehyung holds his enthusiastic salute until Yoongi disappears from sight.

                  Hoseok, still mildly offended about his tie, groans. “… Dude, you’re ing whipped. Yoongi was probably Hitler in a previous life or somethin’, why would you wanna work under a tyrant like that?”

                  “He wasn’t Hitler!” he protests, “the sergeant would’ve been like, Mussolini or something. But he’s my role model, alright? He knows how to run a police squad like a machine. I’d like to take his place someday.”

                  “Yeah, his senile old mind probably thinks he’s still in the army—”

                  Taehyung suddenly shushes him, smothering a hand over Hoseok’s face as he stares through the window. “Wait— there’s a suspicious person outside. It might be one of the drunks.”

                  “Then what are you waiting for,” Hoseok gripes, moving his hand away. “Go get ‘em, tiger.” As he watches Taehyung make the jog outside, the secretary stands and strides over to the other side of the office. “Namjoon from Human Resources; what’s up?”

                  “Th-That— you’re sitting on my reports— okay,” Namjoon stutters as Hoseok slides his rear across his desk. “It’s still work hours, Hoseok-ah— shouldn’t you be working?”

                  The latter grabs a crouton out of Namjoon’s salad and inadvertently changes the subject. “Hey, can I see what the interns look like? You already have mugshots, right?”

                  “W-Well, uh.” Namjoon pushes up his glasses in the midst of typing away. “There’s confidential information beside the pictures, so d-don’t—”

                  Hoseok turns the monitor around before he finishes uttering his pleas. “Ooh, this is the kid that Taehyung’s babysitting, right? What a cutie. Looks like a , but still a cutie.”

                  Namjoon lets out a hoarse laugh. “Yeah. And this here is going to be m—”

                  “Listen, no one cares.”

                  “Y-Yes, o-okay.”

                  Taehyung returns some time later, his pinks pink with cold. He’s preceded by a young male adorning a blue pompom hat, wrists cuffed behind his back. “I caught ‘im!” the detective bellows, all smiles and teeth. “Some kind of loiterer, I assume.”

                  Namjoon takes an aghast look at the so-called offender and opens his mouth to speak before Hoseok smacks his arm. “Taehyung, that’s— ow! Wh-what was that for…?”

                  “Nice job, man!” Hoseok chuckles obnoxiously. “Another bad guy for you.”

                  “Right?!” Taehyung beams before turning to glare at his culprit. “I’m gonna process the hell out of your ,” he says, leading him to take a seat beside his desk. “And you’ll detained for hours.”

                  The male offers a sigh before arguing, “I’m not guilty of anything, I was just walking around.”

                  “LIES!” Taehyung slams a fist down onto his desk, trying not to wince at the pain in his hand. “I caught you in the same exact spot you were in thirty-two minutes ago. See the snow outside? It’s proof; no shoeprints. If you were just walking around like you insist, there would be shoeprints. Loitering is a chargeable offense, and on municipal property, no less?”

                  The male stares at him, blinking only habitually as if to process information. “Well,” he sighs again. “If you consider the weather factor in this situation, it is currently negative twelve degrees outside, and snow is—oh, excuse me; negative twelve degrees celsius—and snow is falling at a rate of fifteen miles per hour with the wind rate being a mere two miles per hour. Given the freezing point of water, which I assume you’ve learned in elementary school, sir, and the contributing wind factor as well as the fact that there is not only one, but several CCTV’s posted around the building, I can safely say that I have indeed been ‘walking around’ as snow covered my prints and not loitering, as you suggested.”

                  The whole room is slammed with silence as the male stares passively at his shoes. Some of the other employees have stopped their tasks to stare in shock; Hoseok can be heard in the background saying, “ooh, someone just got wrecked.”

                  “By definition,” the male continues despite how red Taehyung’s neck is growing. “The act of loitering is 'remaining in any one place under circumstances that would warrant a reasonable person to believe that the purpose or effect of that behavior is to enable a criminal street gang to establish control over identifiable areas, to intimidate others from entering those areas, or to conceal illegal activities.' I wasn't doing any of these things, I was standing. But I’m not the detective here or anything,” he adds, snorting.

                  “H-How would you know that definition?!”

                  “Photographic memory,” he shrugs. “It’s actually quite helpful to learn the law.”

                  Hoseok starts laughing so hard he falls off the edge of Namjoon’s desk.

                  “Wha—!” The detective becomes so red with fury and embarrassment amongst other things that he can’t help but blubber. “A-Alright, enough! Let’s see who you really are—” He yanks the hat off his head to reveal raven-like tufts of hair that fall languidly over his equally bored looking eyes; Taehyung is, subsequently, caught with a gaping mouth. “… Y-You look more like a criminal than anyone I’ve ever known!”

                  “Are you saying that criminals have to look a particular way?” he sneers. “Discrimination.”

                  “SHUT THE HELL YOUR MOUTH.”

                  Namjoon, in a low, somewhat terrified voice, eyes Hoseok when he finally manages to get off the floor. “D-Does Taehyung not really know who that is…?”

                  “This is getting good,” Hoseok cackles, nearly choking on his own breath as Yoongi strides in through the front doors. “Oh —”

                  “What’s with the commotion,” the sergeant grunts, tossing his wet jacket onto Hoseok’s empty desk. “Why isn’t everyone working?”

                  “Sir!” Taehyung immediately jumps to his side, nearly bawling. “My perpetrator won’t cooperate with me! HE’S MEAN.”

                  Yoongi sighs and walks over to where the perp sits. “Detective Kim, I’ve told you many times that you have to play the bad cop sometimes, and—” He stops when he meets the young male face-to-face. “… Detective Kim, this—this is the perp?”

                  “Yeah! I found him loitering outside the station— he could’ve been one of those guys assaulting women, like you warned.”

                  “… Uncuff him.”

                  Taehyung coughs. “Wh-What?”

                  “I DEMAND YOU TO UNCUFF HIM, YOU BLUNDERING MORON.” This time it’s Yoongi who’s red with fury, reaching over to grab his detective by the collar. “HE’S NOT A CRIMINAL, HE’S YOUR INTERN.”

                  The male looks up at them, asserting a gleeful grin on his otherwise stoic expression. “Hello,” he says. Taehyung watches in complete mortification as he stands up to bow, handcuffs clinking noisily behind him. “I’m Jeon Jungkook, intern and officer-in-training to the ever so lovely Detective Kim Taehyung, starting today.”

                  He lifts his head to smirk and Taehyung could swear a chill ran down his spine.

                  “Pleased to be working with you.”