Taehyung wasn’t sure what had happened to Jungkook two months ago, but he sure as hell didn’t like it. The two, along with Jimin, had always been close; but that was before Jungkook started pulling himself away from them. In fact, Jungkook was pulling away from all of them. Quiet at meals, staying up later than everyone else at the studio or heading to the dorm early and going straight to bed. The boy had become increasingly elusive, sometimes Taehyung went a couple days without even having a proper conversation with him. And while he desperately wanted to talk to Jungkook about it, he had refrained in order to respect his privacy. That hadn’t stopped him from dropping numerous hints about how Kookie could tell him anything, not that it had helped. The closest he had gotten to what was bothering Kookie was a month ago.

(1 Month Prior)

Taehyung groaned as he flopped around in bed. Reaching out his hand to pull Jungkook closer, he shot up when he found only cold sheets. Taehyung looked around the room to make sure he hadn’t fallen off the bed or something, which was something Jungkook was known to do on occasion since he slept like a rock. However he wasn’t there; Taehyung felt a little panic try to creep in, after all, he was probably just using the restroom or something. Except Jungkook hadn’t really been himself lately and Taehyung was worried. Especially since this was the first night in three weeks that Kookie had found his way into Taehyung’s bed, which used to be a regular occurrence. Something was wrong and Taehyung knew it; he had tried to ask Jimin about it but had been dismissed since the boy was naturally shy anyway.  

Taehyung maneuvered through the small dorm room, only to find it empty of Jungkook. Racking his brain for where Jungkook might have gone, he walked out the door in his PJs and headed towards the roof. When the group had first arrived it had become a favorite place of Jungkook’s, and he could often be found there drawing, sleeping, or just relaxing. Taehyung was hoping that he had gone up there again tonight.

He sprinted up the stairs and shoved the door open to the roof; it had a tendency to stick sometimes, but this time it swung open easily-already partially open- and Taehyung tripped a little at the give. Immediately his eyes found Jungkook. He was standing on the edge of the building, holding onto a nearby pole.

“Kookie?” Taehyung spoke softly as he approached, trying his best not to startle the boy. However his heart was pounding in fear, surely he wasn’t going to jump? Taehyung would’ve known if it had gotten that bad, right?

It was silent for a moment, and Kookie just continued to stare off into the distance. “Have you ever thought about flying, hyung?”

Taehyung felt a little apprehensive at where exactly this conversation was leading, “Sometimes... I don’t know of anyone who hasn’t though, at one point.” Taehyung moved even closer, close enough that he could see how loosely Jungkook’s hand was actually gripping the pole. “Why don’t we talk about this inside Kookie?”

“You know, I’ve thought about flying a lot recently, and I think flying and falling aren’t really all that different,” Jungkook told him, and Taehyung felt a chill run down his spine. “Both are ways to get away from your problems.”

“Jungkook-ah, why don’t you come down and tell me about it?” Taehyung tried because he honestly wasn’t sure what Jungkook was planning on doing.

“I used to think I was willing to give everything to be a singer, but now... I just don’t know anymore hyung. I wanted to be good enough, but I’m not.” Jungkook continued on, leaning forward a bit as the wind rustled his hair. “I just keep thinking about how easy it’d be to just take a step and then-”

Taehyung yanked the boy off the ledge and held him in his arms. Tears were welling in his eyes and his voice broke as he tried to speak, “No, No, No, Jungkook you can’t…” He took a shaky breath before loosening his hold so that they could look each other in the eye. “Promise Kookie, that you’ll never step off.” When the boy was silent for a second; Taehyung spoke again, using his hands to lightly grasp the boy’s face and wipe away the tears that had overflowed his soft brown eyes. “Promise me, right now Jungkook. I can’t-” His voice caught, forcing him to breathe for a second. “We need you, Jungkook, and more than that, we all love you. We’re all a big family, and you don’t get to decide when you leave it.”

“I promise.” The voice was quiet and hoarse, like he’d been crying for a long time. Taehyung sighed in relief, pulling the boy against his chest.

“Say it again, just one more time for me...please,” Taehyung said, burying his face in the messy black hair resting against his shoulder.

“I promise Taehyung hyung.” Jungkook told him, voice more steady as the maknae slowly began to calm back down.

“Let’s go back to bed okay?” Taehyung told him softly, running a hand along the boy’s back. Jungkook just nodded and as they stood up, it was apparent that he was still shaking a little. “Come on, let hyung give you a piggy-back ride.”

He managed a small smile as Jungkook hopped on him and held on tight. However, as he noticed how light the boy had become, he frowned; deciding not bring that up quite yet, he focused on getting them back to the dorm before the others noticed they were gone.

The trip was quiet, just the whisper soft breaths at Taehyung’s neck. It didn’t take long before they stood in front of Taehyung’s empty bed. Jungkook slid off his back and straight into the bed, using a loose hand to nervously tug Taehyung in with him. The two cuddled close together and silence consumed the room. It was only as Taehyung was already half-asleep that Jungkook turned to him and with wide, vulnerable eyes and asked him a question.

“Promise you won’t leave me?”

Taehyung’s heart broke, “Never, Kookie, Never. Not in a million years.” He just watched as the boy nodded and smiled a little before moving closer to Taehyung, who wrapped an arm around the maknae.

The next morning, Jungkook was gone again. Taehyung sprinted out of the room, only to run into everyone in the kitchen.

“You finally up Tae?” Jin teased, pausing his fork in mid-air. Jungkook was to his right and was cutting up his food; everything was so...normal.

“Yeah, Yeah, sorry, did I sleep in too late?” He asked, taking his seat at the table beside Jimin. A plate was passed to him, and Taehyung began to eat slowly looking around the table, eyes continuously falling on the maknae.

“No, we have today off thankfully.” Jimin told him, cheerful notes in his voice.

“Oh? Good. Umm Jungkook could I talk to you real quick?” He asked, purposely avoided the other members confused glances, to focus on how Jungkook turned stiff at the words.

“Yeah, that’s fine, I was full anyway. Let me just put my plate away.” Jungkook told him, pushing away from the table, an action that Taehyung mirrored before walking into the hallway to wait for Jungkook.

It took a minute, but he followed, hands nervously playing with his hair. “Yes, Hyung?”

“Jungkook, about last night. I think you need to talk to someone, if not one of us then a therapist. I’ve never seen you like that…” Taehyung ran a hand through his own hair, “It scared me Jungkook, I really thought you might jump.”

“I’m sorry, hyung. I really am” Jungkook looked away as he continued, “I’ve already talked to Bang PD-nim about it, we’ve been trying to work something out. I never meant for any of you to see me like that.”

“Jungkook it’s okay, we’re here to help each other, and if you need to miss some practice to talk to someone, none of us are going to mind.” Taehyung told him, trying to comfort the boy by putting a hand on his shoulder.

However Jungkook flinched away from it, and his eyes flicked to meet Taehyung’s. They were fearful and as the boy spoke he sounded desperate, “Please, Hyung, you can’t tell the others. It won’t interfere with practice and I don’t want them to know.”

Taehyung felt a little uncomfortable hiding something like this from his own hyungs, but he couldn’t find a good enough to reason to justify sharing when Jungkook looked like this. As long as he was getting help, then it should be fine; besides Bang PD-nim knew, and he’d help to watch Jungkook.

“Okay Jungkook-ah, if that’s what you want.” Taehyung spoke, and while Jungkook’s face lit up with excitement before thanking him; Taehyung felt sick.

A month later, and while Taehyung wasn’t sure if Kookie was or wasn’t seeing a therapist, he seemed relatively normal comparatively. There hadn’t been any other major incidents since then and though it was obvious that most of the smiles the young boy gave were forced, at least he was trying. Taehyung had kept as close as possible hoping to figure out what was wrong, but had thus far been mostly unsuccessful.

He also noted how Jungkook had been wearing almost completely long sleeve shirts; pulling away whenever one of the members tried to roll up his sleeves for him when it got hot. At first Taehyung was concerned that Jungkook was hurting himself, he had heard the stories and had seen someone in high school with scars littered up their arms. However, on the rare occasions when Jungkook slept, Taehyung often took the opportunity to check. He had discovered numerous bruises along his arms, some red, some yellow, some blue; but no scars.

He wasn’t sure he had ever felt as relieved as he had the first night he snuck into Jungkook and Namjoon’s room. No matter what the situation was, at least Jungkook hadn’t fallen too far, at least not yet. Although the bruises raised a lot of concern themselves. He had never seen Jungkook be clumsy, or run into things the way Namjoon did; and he knew none of the members would be playing with him that roughly.

Taehyung tried to leave it alone, figuring that if something was really wrong Jin would have noticed. The eldest noticed everything about all of them, sometimes even before they noticed it themselves. Besides, he was also notorious for keeping an extra close watch on the maknae, so if Jin hadn’t said anything, Kookie must be getting better.