It was a cold and bitter December night when Namjoon decided to take the plunge.

It had all begun with a simple "Hello". He had such beautiful eyes, a lovely smile whenever it showed, and though he was a little sassy, Min Yoongi never failed to bring a smile to the young Kim Namjoon's lips. There was definitely something stirring in the depths of Namjoon's heart every time he looked at the black-haired male. Something he later found out was clear feelings of affection, and wanting to be something more than friends with this young man. 

After much deliberation from his friends, Namjoon finally asked the college sophomore out on a date. 

Yoongi gladly accepted.

A few weeks later, the two shared their first kiss under plastic mistletoe, something that Hoseok had planted above their flat's entrance to orchestrate the whole event. Namjoon was sour about this, until Yoongi actually found it funny and kissed Namjoon without hesitation. 

On New Year's Eve, Namjoon worked up the courage to ask Min Yoongi out. 

Yoongi, without hesitation, said yes. 

The two young men, both in love, giving each other time, affection, everything that Namjoon had ever wanted and needed from someone. Yoongi was somehow awkward, but so was Namjoon, and that was something they both had in common and could bond over.

Kisses were shared in the confines of Yoongi's apartment, bodies mangled together under the sheets and everything was just perfect. 

What you say? 

The young couple were soon seeming to be... distant. Namjoon could not understand. What had happened? Why was Yoongi so distant now? Every time he tried to hold a conversation he was met with grunts. Every time he leaned in for a kiss, it was either returned hesitantly, but most often rejected with a turn of the head or a hand coming between their lips.

Baby, don't play.

Namjoon was livid. This had been the fifth or sixth time he tried to talk to Yoongi about their relationship. What were they now? Was Yoongi still his boyfriend? They felt so estranged... it was like Namjoon did not know Yoongi anymore. The older male was starting to shut him out completely, and their relationship was strained as a result of it.

The two males threw harsh words at each other, and eventually Yoongi stormed out, saying that he was going to go back to his house. Namjoon was left crying in the living room of his flat, until Hoseok had to calm down with some ice cream and a movie. 

I'll always stand under you.

The situation got no better. Namjoon constantly felt like he was beneath his boyfriend. All that love, all the kisses, all the dates, all the sinful moments, were now turning to dust, turning to mere memories that Namjoon looked back at in order to keep himself from going insane. 

What would it take? Sending a set number of messages each day? A set number of kisses that wanted to be exchanged, like a bloody contract? When the messages were so easy to send, words were seamless and easy, now required effort, thought, and care, in order to not get Yoongi angry with him.

And yet, Yoongi was cold, indifferent to Namjoon. He didn't see how much Namjoon was suffering, emotionally. He wasn't the same, Yoongi did not suffer, Yoongi did not care.

I can't do anything.

Namjoon sighed, as he looked down at his phone. He dialled the number he knew by heart, with trembling fingers, and held the phone to his ears after pressing "Call".

"What?" The voice answered coldly; Yoongi's voice had always been snappish lately. His voice had lost the caramel-like softness to it, the condescending yet playful tone was now replaced with harsh and malicious growling. Yoongi was tired. Namjoon could tell that Yoongi was tired of him. 

This was not the man Namjoon thought he knew so well. 

"Let's break up." Namjoon's voice shook. He hated it. But he needed to get this over with, no matter what.

What am I to you?

"Oh. Fine." Namjoon's heart dropped at Yoongi's nonchalant voice, the way the words rolled off his tongue so easily. As if he had been waiting for this to happen. Namjoon had still been hopeful. But, now that the line went dead, Namjoon knew, it was too good to be true. 

He scrolled through his phone, opening Yoongi's contact. This was pointless, for he still remembered the contact, and yet...

Without a second thought, Namjoon deleted the contact Min Yoongi off his phone. He tucked the phone away into his pocket, his breath coming out shaky and frosty as he held himself together, deciding to keep his composure until he could get home to his flatmate. 

Nothing. Nothing at all. 

this story is titled 'what am i to you', which is obviously based on DARK&WILD's intro of the same name. This took the tone of the actual song; starting off as happy, and then turning sad and bitter. Hope you enjoyed some YoonJoon angst, I know I didn't lies I totally did
hope you're all doing well, today <3