yesterday had started and ended so well, he was kind of worried about today.    he woke up early, got to jog for an hour and his mother made kimchi pancakes that for once, were absolutely perfect. his dad gave him extra allowance and he totally aced that corporate finance test. after his classes were finished, he had practice. he was looking forward to it all day ever since jinhwan let it slip they were practicing in seoul olympic stadium.    "i know the stadium itself is a building made out of scandals and controversies but hello, it's still seoul freaking olympic stadium."    even when he was covered in sweat from head to toe, and he reeked worst than a sewer after those three hours of practice, he still didn't want to leave. the open roof, the empty bleachers, the spotlights, the green grass, the twinkling stars - this was his kind of euphoria.    it was surely one of the best days of hanbin's life, so he was skeptical about today because life is a balance of both good and bad; great and awful. yesterday was the best, what about today?   today...   so early in the morning, he walks outside to get some fresh air. maybe jog if he was in the mood.    but what he sees when he turns his head a little to the left, is jaewon and hayi walking out the jung's household. hand in hand. laughing about something, both of them. hayi was looking at jaewon the way she did before, when hanbin thought she liked him most.    that part was okay. he was kind of used to getting overlooked by hayi. unfortunately. painfully. that was the truth.   the part that didn't settle in his stomach, that made him go back inside his house, was how jaewon was looking back at her.              "it's hard."   "what?"   "moving on."   "ugh, hanbin, are you seriously -"   "i see her every day. every day. she's my best friend."   "you and her didn't even dated! not once!"   "i know."   "..."   "that's why it's so hard."              the whistle blows from across the yard, but his ears are still ringing even after the sound. he winces a little before following the others as they jog towards their coach, who only has eyes on hanbin. and not in a good way.   he struts towards hanbin, looking angry and downright scary. "kim hanbin! get your head in it! this is our last practice so stop dillydallying!" he screams in his face. he's a little relieved he's not entirely covered in saliva when his coach walks away, giving him back his personal space.    "as you know, weather forecasts are saying starting from tomorrow, it's going to snow. i don't want any injuries on my team, and try not to enjoy the holidays too much, okay? we're going jogging on the 20th and 27th and water training on the 30th. remember that! it's for you boys to prepare yourselves for the annual training camp next year, if we're lucky enough, the whole team might be chosen and nobody gets left behind. so play hard, work harder. dismissed!"    jinhwan slings an arm around his shoulders, he doesn't even ask what hanbin's performance out there was all about. he had let the opposing team score two goals. right under his nose. two. he was so unfocused and totally out of it that hanbin can't wait to go home and just sleep through this, whatever this was.    his friend pats him on the back. "you're going to be okay."    it's a month long vacation, unless his family or her family will be taking a trip out of town or even out of the country, he's not so sure about jinhwan's words at all.    when he comes that evening, there are no planned out of town trips. or even possibilities of spontaneous ones soon. sadly.              he stirs into consciousness when he hears the words, "oh what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh". but then he realizes the words aren't just words, they're lyrics. and the song, the tune, the voice that's singing it is something very familiar to him.    when his eyes flutter open, his room comes into focus. a face peers down at him, bright, beaming and on the verge of laughing.   "hey, wake up! it's twelve noon. who sleeps in on their favorite day of the year?"    it's so early in the morning, he doesn't have the strength to hurt himself by over-thinking her presence. why she's here, how is she here and what in the world was she doing here so early in the morning.    she stood up straight, her hands behind her back and her smile vibrant and wide. "you should know jaewon and chanwoo are downstairs, helping your mom cook for the neighborhood christmas party later because you're too busy lazying around."   hanbin scratches the back of his head as he tries to sit up on his bed. "huh?" he squints his eyes, trying to focus in on her again. he's been avoiding her since the start of the christmas holidays, but today, he's obviously failed.   he looks at her. her hair, her smile, the cute little red and green plaid dress she wore every christmas, and he feels a smile creeping up his face. "oh, just five more -"   everything was so blissful for once, then suddenly, he's got his face smashed against a plate of cream pie.    he's frozen on his bed and miles away, he hears hayi laughing hysterically similar to that of a hyena found in africa.    "lee hayi!!!"    "oh, relax! it's your favorite! mango meringue!" she laughs again, even harder than just seconds ago if that was even possible. hanbin wipes the cream off his eyes, then off of his cheeks and the rest of his face. "merry christmas, you big idiot."              the neighborhood christmas party was always a blast. always. hanbin's not lying, he never would. but this time around, things have changed. he's getting older and so are his preferences. sure he still loves mrs. lee's mango meringue pies, and hey, who doesn't love a good grape punch, but he still feels like it was lacking despite everyone's best efforts to keep the festivity going.    during the exchanging gifts, hanbin was picked by chanwoo and he knows jaewon lent a hand on buying the right gift. he gives it to his mom for him to open later. he has back against the cement wall, shoulder to shoulder with jaewon as they both hold bottles of beer. drinking with all the male adults of the neighborhood. everyone was present, the whole ensemble of neighbors were around.    from across the lawn, hayi was playing with the smaller kids. blowing bubbles up in the air and laughing every time chanwoo popped them with his fingers. she blew more when the kids looked like they might cry.    "hey," jaewon whispers in his ear. hot breath against his cold skin. "i just remembered mino rented a club for tonight. till three in the morning. it's still ten thirty, want to go out for a while?" he asks, leaning forward so hanbin could see him from his peripheral.   hanbin hasn't seen much of jaewon these past few weeks, not even at school and not even before break had started. but he heard all the biology majors were working on their final projects and he guesses jaewon was working hard. so he clearly understood where his old friend was coming from, he wanted to lay off some steam and relax for once. it was the holidays, the calm before the storm. the storm being the second semester. hanbin should be happy jaewon's asking him to hang out, it's been a while.    so, hesitantly and only because he was doing this for his love for jaewon, he agrees. "i'll go get my motorcycle."    their mothers took a while convincing, but after promising to them for the nth time that they'll be home before one and that they had each other's backs ("yes, mrs. jung, i'll make sure jaewon doesn't even think about making a fist."), they're finally off the hook and they teeter towards the kim's, where hanbin's motorcycle sat in the dark and cold garage, just waiting to be used.   "hey,"   hayi pushes both off their heads. jaewon almost trips over his own two feet. hanbin flinches a little, rubbing the spot she laid her heavy hand on. they both turn to look at her.   she was all wide eyes, sublte smile. picture of innocence. "i'm going with you." she says.   jaewon snorts at the same time hanbin says, "as if."   hayi looks annoyed. she scowls at them before rolling her eyes. "i know about it. who in the whole school doesn't? song mino, that guy from the arts and sciences department? yeah, he invited my friends and i himself."   both of the boys exchange skeptical, hesitant looks. it kind of drives her off the edge. "hayi, you're not even -"   "where we're going, i only need them to show my college id and i'm in. like you two." she points to the pair. "i'm coming with you. i told mom, and she's reassured because both of you are there too. i'll be there with my friends, and -" her eyes flicker to meet hanbin's. when she does, she stops talking and closes . instead, she sighs a little and looks at them pleadingly. "please?"   jaewon gestures to hanbin. he was the oldest but the three of them knew hanbin was the most level-headed and rational. he didn't want her to be out so late, but then again, the two of them would be with her. hanbin wouldn't dare let her leave his sight, he knew this. and if, her mother already gave her permission, the boys had little say on the final decision.    "if you're coming along," he has yet to say any confirmation, but she's already smiling brightly. he does a once over on her outfit. a dress that ended above the knees, but she was wearing black stockings. acceptable enough. "we have to take a taxi. not my motorcycle. and we're back by one."    "one," she nods obediently. "got it."   jaewon clears his throat, adding, "no alcohol."    "okay, sure." the smile never leaves her face. she takes the two of them by the hand and leads them to the main road, away from the party and towards another one.              they lost sight of her almost immediately.   daeko nightclub wasn't skyway, but it was still packed and rowdy and a little bit notorious for a few other things. jaewon was so caught up on greeting and than