bogum was troubled that night after ending that day’s shoot.

Manager: “bogum, aren’t you tired? Take a short nap in the car. I will wake you up when you reached.”

“kenchana.. I am thinking about something.” Bogum’s brow tightened.

Manager: “what happened again? I thought you are already mastering the feel of being a seja chor ha, what else are you worried about?”

“bwo… hyung… I looked worried?” bogum asked in surprise.

Manager: “neh.. and to correct. You looked very worried. What’s the matter?”

Bogum bited his lips… he is a very easy to read person, especially in front of manager hyung whom he is always with, there is nothing that manager hyung doesn’t know.

“hyung… I really love this drama, and I think I can perform so well cos all my feelings are real. Somehow it doesn’t seem to me like acting anymore. I really have been processed by seja..” bogum sighed unknowingly.

Manager: “and then?”

Bogum turned his head sideway to look out of the window, “uh… and then?? Uh…?”

Manager: “and then what’s the problem? Is it not good to be able to assimilate in your role so well? so what’s the problem? Yoo-jungie?”

Bogum gasped and he lifted his head immediately to face manager hyung. He was left speechless and he looked at manager in his face,  “hyung….”

Manager: “that’s it. no need to explain. Your face says it all.”

Bogum: “was it that obvious hyung? I thought I hid it very well…. otokae… “

Manager: do you think we are blind? You may seem to hide it well from others who don’t really know you. Come on, I have been with you since your previous dramas and I have never seen you behaving like this, all smitten and gigglish when she is around..” and manager began to mimic bogum’s behaviours while he is with yoojung.

“hyung…. hajima…” bogum was really embarrassed.

“Putting your real feelings into the drama is good. but you should know everything ends when the drama ends. And yoo jung is still very young. Keep your feelings to just for a little sister and no more. Yoo jung is a very nice girl. If I am half good looking as you, I would have gone all out to win her hands if I am not a public figure.”

Bogum pondered over the word ‘public figure’. Yes, both him and yoojungie are public figures.

He has to control his feeling to protect himself, to protect yoo jung.

It is probably he is confused over lee Yeong’s emotion with his own since he is in a drama now. Everything will return to its original state once the drama is over.

Yes… at least that’s how bogum convinced himself at this moment.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++

“anyeonghasaeyo” yoo jungie appeared at the set the next morning, wide smile and cheerful as always.

“bogum oppa, you slept well yesterday?” yoo jung came into the waiting room to see bogum reading his script.

Bogum can’t hide his smile upon seeing pretty yoojungie. He was about to greet yoojung with a bright smile when he recalled yesterday night. He didn’t sleep well cos he has promised himself to maintain distance with Yoo Jungie from today onwards.

Bogum cleared his throat and gave a formal but fake answer,  “neh, I slept well” and returned to reading his script.

Yoo jung remained indifferent with bogum’s cold behavior as she thought bogum may need time to concentrate and prepare for his scenes.

This morning, they are filming the scene of seeking rain shelter from a pavilion in town. Jinyoung will also be in this scene.

As they rehearsed their lines and action, Jinyoung teased and played around with Yoo Jung most of the time during breaks as Bogum kept his distance away from them.

At the corner of Bogum’s eyes, he was constantly observing yoojung and jinyoung and sulking in his heart that he has to promise to keep a distance. Deep in thoughts, he recalled how he has laughed so heartily with yoo jungie for the past 3 days. Just a few days and yoo jung has entered his heart and occupied such a dominant space…

“oppa… bogum oppa..” bogum turned his head as he heard his name. in front of him is yoo jungie with a camera shooting him, smiling playfully behind the camera.

“self-camera?” and naturally he just introduced himself and his role formally for yoo jung’s camera.

“oppa? Are you angry with me?” yoo jung came over to bogum who has been distancing himself from her since early morning. “whei? Did I do something wrong?” yoo jung looked at bogum with her curious eyes.

Ahhh… that pair of eyes… that melts bogum right from the start. How to even be angry with this lady when she is staring at me like this… bogum avoided her eyes immediately. “aniyo.. nothing of this sort.”

“then why are you treating me like this?’ yoo jung probed, with a seemingly hurt tone.

“huh.. behaving like what?” bogum  turned his head towards yoo jung again, and this time he spotted the sadness in her eyes. He knew his action has probably caused her to think that it is her fault.

Bogum became flustered again. His aim is to keep a distance but not causing people to be sad or hurt because of his action.

“Aniya, Aniya, it is not you. Jinjiat! It is just me…” bogum’s voice cracked a little, feeling a little helpless with the situation he is in now.

Although being young, yoo jung is a very matured lady who has seen much of this industry. She somehow is able to guess what is bothering bogum and made a smart guess immediately.

“whei oppa? You are very stress, isn’t it? Don’t worry. You will do well. and pls do not keep a distance just cos I am underage.  I know director has been saying viewers might receive our pairing negatively but we are professional isn’t it. you are now seja and I am now Raon. Let’s just live as them as long as we are in this drama. enjoy the process, shall we?” yoo jung stretched out her hands to bogum.

Totally didn’t expect this to come from someone so young, bogum doesn’t know whether to laugh or cry. But yoo jung words have led him to reflect how narrow his thinking has been. True enough, they are professional actors and actresses and she is half right to think that he is distancing himself cos of her age, although bogum knew in his heart that this is not the main reason.

“yoo jung ah…”bogum hesitated while looking at the small hand that is stretched out to him. How can he bear to hurt this young lady’s feeling.

Internally he is also struggling. He wishes to really enjoy the company of yoo jung but his inner moral values cannot seem to compromise.

“oppaa…pai li” yoo jung pouted this time. 

bogum let out a silent sigh of defeat. “kurei, let’s enjoy the process and hang out well together.” He took her hands in his and smiled brightly at yoo jung who returned his smile with her little nod and smiley face.

In his heart, bogum brimmed even brighter, with this silent thought: pls god, let me sin for just this moment. Let me enjoy this process of falling in love.