??? POV

It’s been a week since you come back from the states and surprise me in front of my door. I’ve never thought that you will ever turn up in my front door after what happen between us... 4 years ago.

-flashback-

“What the hell are you doing with that girl Am!”

“She’s just a friend Krys. Nothing more, nothing less”

“What?? As far as I know, friends don’t kiss their other friend’s lips”

“Krys.. Please hear me first”

“Go away Am, I hate you”

“Krystal”

-end of flashback-

That painful memory still haunting me. After that fateful night, we broke up and you’ve gone to the states three days later. I’ve tried my best to forget about you, my boyfriend list keep on increasing but not even one that can distract me from thinking about you. I feel stupid because even after what had happen, I’m still here, thinking about you madly. When I see you in front of my door last week, I was shocked and froze on the spot. You’re still stunning like before.. Maybe more. You look more masculine and your black hairs is much shorter compare to your hairs 4 years ago.

“Hello Krystal. It’s been a long time” you hand me a bouquet of flower

“What is this for?” I keep my stern face and voice to you, altho I know my heart flutter with your action. I never thought you still remember my favorite flower. I took the flower the flower that you give

“Can we go inside and talk?”

“Is it important? I don’t have time”

“It’s about us” what more do you want from me Am?? Didn’t you have made my life miserable enough before you went back to the states?

“There’s nothing to talk about” I try to slam the door in front of your face, only to be block by you hand as you open the door back and look directly to me

“Please Krystal. Let me explain everything” you plead. I look into your eyes to search for the truth. Surprisingly, your eyes shows….sincerity and sadness??

“Fine.. Come inside” I go ahead to my living room and put the flower on the table before I sit on my sofa as you come toward me and sit..on the floor??

“What the hell are you doing? You don’t need to sit on the floor” I poke your shoulder again and again, hoping you will stood up and sit anywhere besides the floor. You make me look like I’m the devil right now

“A servant place always below her princess place, right?” I was stunned with your words. I used to say that to you. Not in an insulting manner okay, I say it in playful manner, back when we are together

“You say you want to explain right? So do what you want to do”

“Krystal. It’s been 4 years since I’ve…. Lost you… I know I look like a coward when I went back to states 3 days after that incident. It’s not that I don’t want to make thing right, but my father had a heart attack and want me to come home. I’ve never forget about you Krystal. Not even once. I’ve tried everything to contact you but my effort went avail. I’m sorry that I broke your trust that day. I was wrong, I was jealous when I saw you with Myungsoo one day before the party. I was thinking of teaching a lesson or two to you, but I never thought that my stupid plan went wrong and I end up losing you, 4 years ago. Trust me Krystal, I’ve never thought that girl have the gut to kiss me and I was dumb founded at that time because I was hoping that this is just a dream, because I don’t want to lose you for someone that I don’t know. Unfortunately, it was not a dream for me, it was a nightmare for me.. for us.. So please, will you give me another chance to redeem my mistake? Please let me renew my vows and promise to you” She kneeled in front of me as she lower her head, clutching her shorts. I can see a few drops of tears start to stain her brown shorts.  I don’t know what to say to her. A part of me still hurt by what she’s done but another part of me is begging me to give her chance. After thinking thoroughly, I've decided to give her answer.

 “Give me time.. That’s all I can say” I say to you as I stare blankly to the ceiling

“I will Krystal. I will” you hug my feet as I just look at you

Now, it’s been 5 month since you come back and you’ve been trying to court me right ever since I give my indefinite answer to you. I can’t help but to be please with everything that you do to make me happy, but my stubborn heart still haven’t give a green light for me to give you another chance. Although you have your own house here, but sometimes, you will sleepover in my house, just like today. I went to the kitchen to grab something to drink as I pass the couch that you use to sleep whenever you decided to sleepover in my house. I look at your deep slumber face as I analyze all the features in your face. It’s still perfect like before. How I wish thing between us weren’t over. How I wish I could see your face every morning I wake up… I wish I could erase the bad memories and come back to you, like I always did before. But everytime I try to open up my heart for you, the wound from the past will also be opened up again and it tear me apart from saying yes to you. You didn’t know how hard for me to pick myself up after what happen. I know everyone make mistake, but forgetting and forgiving is two different thing. I’ve forgiven you the day you’ve been honest to me on what happen that fateful night, but forgetting about it is another story as the visuals of that night keep on replaying whenever I want to accept you. I’m scared that maybe one day, you will change your mind and broke our promises, again. I’m sorry Am, I guess I need a little more time to decide.

Little do you know

How I’m breaking while you fall asleep

Little do you know

I’m still haunted by the memories

Little do you know

I’m trying to pick myself up piece by piece

Little do you know

I need a little more time

Underneath it all I’m held captive by the hole inside

I’ve been holding back for the fear that you might change your mind

I’m ready to forgive you but forgetting is a harder fight

Little do you know

I need a little more time

Am’s POV

“Hey Am”

“Yes Krys?”

“How long will you wait for my answer?”

“As long as I can Krys”

“Even though I might say no to you?”

“Maybe….yes??  But one thing for sure, I’ll always be here for you, whether you like it or not”

I’ll always wait for you Krystal, no matter what happen. I know it’s hard for you to accept what had happen, but one thing