Moving in together. That definitely was easier said than done.

Jiyong had thought that there were barely going to be any problems with Seungri moving into his apartment, the both of them got along nearly perfectly, never really fighting at all, and the two were so deeply in love, so what could possibly go wrong?

Turned out that love wasn’t everything.

It all started a week after the couple had returned back to South Korea after their Africa vacation, being all giddy and happy, on cloud seven you could say. YG had practically eaten Jiyong alive and spat him out for their sudden adventure though, and the idol was more than happy that he hadn’t told his boss that he was dating the kindergarten teacher because, obviously, he would’ve been killed.

So for a week the two young men had been waiting for Yang Hyunsuk to calm down and leave the blonde rapper alone so they could silently move in together. In secret. Though, it probably wasn’t much of a secret, Jiyong thought, considering he had told Youngbae, Chaerin and Seunghyun, and Seungri had told at least Daesung.

Anyway, so they started the whole procedure and at first everything went like Jiyong had expected it to go: They sat down together and decided which rooms and furniture in the idol’s apartment would be redecorated, where to get new furniture and more importantly which room would become Seungri’s personal room slash office. Happiness was a weak word to describe their feelings, it was soppy and cheesy through and through how they sat on the couch, looking for inspirations online and spending sixty percent of the time just cuddling and kissing. 

But then reality caught up with them.

When one day they drove to Seungri’s apartment to decide which furniture could be used in Jiyong’s flat it soon dawned on the idol just how much their opinions diverged.

As mentioned somewhen before, Seungri was a messy Person. Not in a sense of him leaving his everywhere and his rooms not being tidy but more like… well, you could say interior design wasn’t his forte. His rooms, except for his bedroom, looked like a mix of all furniture pieces he had received, bought or found on the streets throughout his life. Nothing was matching anything.

And that’s what made it so difficult later when they were trying to buy new furniture… Like today when they both decided to wake up early and visit a furniture store in disguise and with the promise of the owner to not be exposed during their stay.

Jiyong really hoped his boss wouldn’t find out or else he was most likely going to die.

„Are you kidding me?! You don’t seriously want that to stand in our living room!“ Jiyong squeaked and stuck out his tongue in disgust. „That armchair is hideous!“ 

„Oh, really now? It’s at least a hundred times better than that ugly poop brown leather one you wanted!“

„It’s not poop brown, it’s called Bistre! But of course you wouldn’t know that because you want an orange armchair that looks like it could straight up belong to a nursery-“

„It’s not orange, it’s called Pumpkin!“ Seungri interrupted, imitating Jiyong’s previous tone, causing said one to snort sarcastically.

„Yeah right. I think with that we can see who’s the kindergarten teacher and who’s the designer here.“

„Designer? Pfft, I thought designers are original? Because then, clearly your designer abilities don’t work on your sense of decorating your own apartment since everything in there looks the same. Actually, your home looks like your personality: Expensive, boring and stiff!“

„BORING?! At least I’m not on the mental level of the kids at your kindergarten!“

„Didn’t you say the other day you loved that about me?!“

„Well, that was until I found out I was only expensive and stiff in your eyes!“

„Expensive, stiff AND BORING!“

„AT LEAST I DON’T TALK ING NONSENSE ALL THE TIME AND EMBARRASS EVERYONE AROUND ME!“

…

For a minute the two men stood there in the store, in front of the ugly orange armchair, and simply glared at each other without uttering a single word.

Jiyong and Seungri never fought about anything, they were the kind of people that would discuss topics and disagreements in a civilized way rather than screaming and insulting the other person, so it came as a surprise that they got so fired up about furniture. After all they had arguments about way worse and more difficult issues but not once did they hold a grudge against the other nor did it ever turn into a real argument. It was more like a discussion - kind of like a business meeting Jiyong thought. The couple tended to solve problems through strategies and logic.

The idol hated this. He didn’t want to fight with his boyfriend, he didn’t even know why he said those things in the first place, after all he knew they weren’t true and Seungri probably knew that as well. Still, they got all heated up and angry over this whole thing, so what exactly was their problem?

„… I’m sorry. I didn’t mean any of it.“ Jiyong mumbled and looked at the ground, suddenly feeling overly guilty. Fiddling with the hem of his black washed-out oversized sweater he began chewing on his lips again, one of his habits whenever he became self-conscious.

He was actually really scared. Seungri wasn’t someone he could afford losing just like that, he wasn’t someone who deserved to be treated like this after all he had selflessly done fore the older during the past few months.

Jiyong knew what it meant to lose someone. People got sick of him so easily.

„I’m sorry too hyung, I really am. Let’s go home for now, okay? We are not in a rush anyway.“

Jiyong nodded in agreement but his eyes stayed glued to the ground, even on their way out. The owner bid them goodbye in an overly friendly way, he was probably hoping to get them to buy a lot in the future, at least that’s what it sounded like when he talked to them.

The idol didn’t really listen though, his mind was in a gutter and his thoughts left a mess. Why was he so concerned? Sure, he had a fight with Seungri, but every couple fought once in a while, right? It wasn’t even that bad, the whole argument was superficial and things were said on a whim, nothing to be worried about.

So why did his heart hurt?

They drove home in silence with Seungri sitting behind the steering wheel of his less suspicious car. Once in a while Jiyong dared to look at the younger’s face only to quickly go back to stare at his own hands.

Just what the hell was happening? Why were they both so affected by something this trivial? Other people talked to each other like this on a regular basis and didn’t care the slightest, hell, Jiyong and Youngbae talked like that all the time. But the atmosphere felt weird and if the blonde was being honest it had been similar a few times before over the last few days, with the mood being slightly tense, not like this though. That’s not how he had imagined his first real fight with his boyfriend, not over a stupid armchair. Or maybe it was about something entirely different?

They arrived about half an hour later back at the apartment and even though there was an obvious elephant in the room, Seungri still didn’t seem to waver in his decision to follow Jiyong instead of going back to his own apartment. Other than a ’thank you’ when the younger held Jiyong the door open, nothing was being said though.

It was only when they were back in their home, discarded of their jackets and shoes, that Seungri took the idol’s hand. For some reason Jiyong had stood there, in his own ing living room, as if he didn’t belong there, not moving and still staring at the ground. It was kind of embarrassing that the younger had to take over and make a move but Jiyong couldn’t help it. Haaah… he must’ve been really weak.

„Ji, look at me.“ The dark haired man said and moved the older’s chin up with his finger. „Let’s sit down on the couch and talk, there is not a single issue we can’t solve, remember?“

Right. Of course he did. The other day they had a discussion about their different opinions about YGE and after they were done they had been praising themselves by saying that there couldn’t possibly be any problem they couldn’t solve. Seungri was right.

They sat down on the couch with their bodies facing each other and the younger was still holding Jiyong’s hand. It felt good, smooth, and the rapper felt the mood getting slightly lighter so he gave Seungri a little smile.

„You know, what happened earlier, I don’t really think it’s about the furniture. I mean, sure, our tastes are completely different so of course that wouldn’t have been easy but for it to escalate like this…“ Seungri began, returning the smile. „We are not like that. Which is obvious by the fact we immediately regretted it.“

„Still, I’m sorry. I meant nothing I said, I love your playful side more than anything!“

„I know, and you also know that nothing I said was true either. I should’ve watched my mouth. Please don’t believe anything I threw at you, you are perfect, okay? And you are anything but stiff and boring.“

Jiyong just nodded again and leapt forward to throw his arms around Seungri’s neck while the younger gladly accepted and returned the embrace. It felt good, but Jiyong knew this wasn’t the end. 

„We aren’t like this.“ He repeated and sighed as he pulled back and observed Seungri’s facial expression and body language. He looked the slightest bit tense and Jiyong knew why. „This is about something different.“

„Do you think we proceeded to quickly? Do you think we should’ve taken it slowly, with our relationship I mean?“ Seungri asked, trying to hide just how upset he was. 

He always played the strong one, Jiyong was a very sensitive person and the younger always wanted to be his strength but it was clear that he was affected just the same.

When Jiyong thought about it, as much as he wanted to deny it, he had to agree with the other’s statement. Without even realizing it, Jiyong found himself under immense pressure during the past few weeks. Their carefree and untitled relationship had suddenly evolved to something serious, a point neither of them had reached before. It felt good to have someone that would be there for you, someone who loves you and whom you can equally love back. But it was also scary because it meant that involuntarily they wouldn’t be independent anymore, in fact, if something bad happened a heartbreak or worse was bound to happen.

Especially with the situation Jiyong was in.

As an idol he had to be extremely careful, he could not just openly get married to Seungri as he pleased, neither could he have children. Perhaps they would have to hide for the rest of their lives!

But what if someone found out? The couple didn’t like to only be affectionate with each other behind closed doors, they wanted a real relationship and it didn’t matter how many times Seungri said he didn’t mind being cautious all the time, it did affect their relationship by straining it. Just look at the media’s and YG’s reaction when they saw them going on vacation. Was that supposed to be their life from now on?

„Yeah, I think we moved too fast…“ Jiyong finally answered and his heart clenched painfully. It was then that he noticed just how much Seungri really meant to him.

„How about we take a break then?“

Jiyong’s eyes widened and he began to furiously shake his head at the suggestion, tightly clinging to Seungri’s shirt.

„No. No no no! We can do this! We don’t need a break! No break! I love you, I really do! I’m sorry!“

He watched as Seungri’s expression turned from hopeful to confused.

Jiyong knew that sentence. Let’s take a break. He heard it often enough, it was the beginning of the end of nearly all of his relationships, the difference was, though, that right now he actually cared. He cared, so much, he wasn’t ready for this to be the end. He loved Seungri so much! 

It always started with a break! Most of his friends as well, they never said it but they meant the same when they began to distance themselves from him, taking the said ing break, before they completely disappeared from Jiyong’s life. Friends, he thought, would stay forever! They were like family to him but they left him when he would’ve needed them the most!

He didn’t want Seungri to disappear! He wanted him to stay-

„Okay, no break. We won’t take a break.“ Seungri said slowly with his overly calm and soft voice while he looked in Jiyong’s eyes and gently untangled said one’s hands from his shirt. „Alright?“

„Y-yes.“

„Good, no break. Then how about we give each other a little time to think? Not as in a break, we are still together, I am still your boyfriend and you are mine, but as in I am going back home so we can both individually think about how to proceed from now on so there is less pressure and we can be happy in the future?“

„…Uh, for how long?“

„Hm, for now let’s say until tomorrow and then we will text each other to see if we are both ready, but if we need more time to think it’s fine as well.“

„B-but-“

„And none of the solutions will be breaking up! This is just about how to proceed from now on, Jiyong, not about ending things.“

„…Okay.“ The idol muttered but wasn’t too happy. Why would he be? 

They stayed quiet for a few minuted, both of them being caught in their own thoughts, until Seungri suddenly stood up. He took his jacket and put it on while throwing Jiyong a smile.

„I think I should leave now.“

„AH, Seungri!“ Jiyong quickly jumped up from his spot on the couch but when he did he felt stupid. He didn’t actually have anything to say, he just didn’t want the younger to leave yet. „ I-I…“

„Yes?“

„I… I love you.“ He eventually said and god, he could’ve slapped himself. Good job, Jiyong, well done. But Seungri chuckled and positioned himself in front of the older, only to press a gentle kiss on his lips.

„I love you too.“

And with that he was gone.

For a few minutes Jiyong just stood there, basically staring at the door that Seungri had closed behind himself after he left. Seungri said they would just take their time thinking about how to continue now, they wouldn’t break up he said, ’I love you’ he said. And Jiyong trusted him, he had to trust him because there was nothing else he could do for now.

With a swift movement he pulled his phone out of his jeans pocket and dialed the number of the only person he knew would be helpful right now.

After a few rings a familiar tired voice answered.

„Hello?“

„Bae, are you free?“

~

„So, what’s the issue here?“ Youngbae said all-knowingly, only asking to hear the details. He placed a plate of freshly cut fruits in front of his best friend, who sat on the soft sofa with his knees up to his chest and a big pillow stuffed in between his legs and tummy, reaching up to his nose.

„Seungri and I had a fight.“

„A fight?“ The older raised his eyebrows as he settled next to moping rapper. „Your first official big fight?“

„… Yeah, no, it’s really weird. You know, right now we are in the process of moving in together.“

„Right.“

„So, considering our opinions about interior design and what not is so incredibly different, we were bound to fight at some point, right?“

„Yeah, that’s only natural. When two different opinions clash with each other it’s only logical that an argument is about to happen. Hyorin and I had quite a few fight over the smallest when we moved in together, it was less about the object of our disagreement than the purpose of winning or making the other feel bad. But you learn to get that under control over time, when the first real fight happens you know the honeymoon phase is over. In the end though that also means that the two of you and your relationship are ready to grow stronger.“

That was true, Jiyong hadn’t really thought about that aspect. But maybe that’s because that wasn’t really his problem to begin with.

„That’s not it. We usually don’t fight like that, we literally insulted each other today. We never did that, we didn’t even raise our voice in the past.“

„That’s what every couple thinks in the beginning buddy, it’s normal.“ Youngbae tried to reassure him but he quickly realized that Jiyong wasn’t having any of it.

„No, like I said that’s not it. The cause of our argument was neither the furniture nor us wanting to make the other feel bad. It was like… I’m not sure, it felt like I was exploding but not because of him. He just happened to be there.“

Youngbae grabbed an apple slice and took a bite of it. While he was munching on the fruit he seemed to be lost in thoughts. 

„So in other words you were angry because of something else?“ He eventually asked as he stuffed a few grapes into his mouth before he had even swallowed the apple.

„I wasn’t angry either. I don’t know. I think I was on edge, actually I have been for a few weeks now but I didn’t really notice it until today.“

„Do you know what caused you to be on edge like that?“

„Probably because of everything happening in my life. Not working, not being able to live on my own, suddenly being in a socially not accepted relationship with someone that could’ve potentially joined YG…

„Ah, yeah, I read the articles about you and Seungri going on vacation together. At least let me tell you that you two already have a small fanbase.“

„Fanbase?“

„They are shipping you two“ Youngbae smirked „meaning they want you to be together for real. I think everyone else only thinks you are friends, so no worries.“