Chanhee woke up to a heavenly aroma invading his sense of smell and tempting his taste buds . Beautiful rich brown orbs fluttered open as the owner sniffed the air and yawned stretching to ease his muscles , only to realize that something was missing . More like some one was missing . Any remnants of sleep quickly vanished at that . The reddish brown haired male sat upright pressing his palm against the other side of bed where his lover occupied and once he found it cold , he instantly panicked .

Did Byunghun leave ?  Could he possibly still believe he was a burden ?

Unable to even entertain that thought , Chanhee left the bed and rushed outside the room , calling his lover's name as he scurried his way to the bathroom , the first place that came to mind . Alas , the door was left partially open and even when he desperately took a glance inside , Byunghun was not there .

Shaking his head in denial , the young man spun on his heels and walked down the hallway  . 

" Byunghun ! " Again , he called as his feet led him to the kitchen , only to be met with the most unexpected sight ever . 

His bedridden lover was standing in front of the stove flipping a pan that seemed to have omelette in it . After that he quickly turned the stove off and walked to the counter twisting the button of the kitchen mixer making the buzz sound stop .

So that's why he couldn't hear me . Chanhee concluded as he let out a loud sigh of relief alerting the younger to his presence . Byunghun turned around , his expression cheerful and proud that the elder almost decided to drop the matter but he couldn't .

He clearly forbade his lover from exerting any unnecessary effort and here he was , doing the exact opposite . 

" Byunghun , what are you doing ? You shouldn't be standing for so long . Come here . " Chanhee  gently scolded as he strode forward , pulling the younger to a chair situated in the middle of the kitchen , only to have the said protest , refusing to sit down or get dragged to a chair like an elderly .

 “ Why do you keep on reminding me ? “ the brown haired male furrowed his eyebrows as he calmly  asked  , as if it was a genuine question in a normal conversation when in fact , the situation was far from normal  . The simple verbal expression of concern on Chanhee’s part meant so much more than that to Byunghun . It broke his heart that his lover , instead of appreciating his efforts , instantly scolds him for leaving bed . He was really looking forward to breakfast too .

the elder parted his lips , ready to say something but stopped and averted his eyes elsewhere sighing when he realized he couldn't defend himself . It was never his intention to constantly remind Byunghun of his state but saying so won't change anything because the younger knew his lover’s intentions . The problem was that Chanhee himself never stopped to think about to it from Byunghun’s perspective .

“ It means alot to me that you care about my well being . However , getting treated like a disabled person ing hurts .” Byunghun’s tone left no room for words . Chanhee's forehead creased as he willed himself to stay calm and ignore the pain resurfacing in his chest as he noticed the bitter hint in the younger's voice . 

"  I'm tired .. I'm sick of ing resting all the time ! " Byunghun exclaimed and finally broke into tears as he slammed his quivering hands on the counter wishing he could just break them to pieces along with his fragile built and punish it for subjecting him to such pain . Why did he deserve that ? Why couldn't life make a mistake and give him an ounce of happiness ? Was it really too much to ask for ? Maybe .. 

 " I just wanted to have a normal breakfast . I wanted to pretend that everything is okay and that I can handle some pain . I wanted us to be normal , at least for a day .. " Tone shifting into a resigned whisper , the ailing male shook his head at his own stupidity . Of course it wouldn't work .. Since when did anything ever work for him ?  He should have just surrendered like he planned to , maybe then it wouldn't have hurt so much .  Sniffing and wiping the tears away , Byunghun took a deep breath in and turned around facing the elder who still had his mouth clamped shut , expression guilty .

Deciding that such ought to be his destiny till the last breath , Byunghun his lips tentatively before suggesting " you know what .. Why don't you just go look for someone else ? " It hurt having to say that , so much that the tears instantly brimmed his eyes and his nose stung but he focused on letting out all of his insecurities . The truth had to be known , no matter how bitter . And if Chanhee wouldn't be the one to talk , then Byunghun would .

As soon as those words left the younger , Chanhee's guilty expression immediately morphed into that of confusion as he failed to decipher what such suggestion implied . And when  he slowly registered the meaning behind those words , anger and betrayal consumed him like fire would lumber . 

" What ? " He questioned in disbelief as he hesitantly approached his lover .

" You mean to say .. you wouldn't get jealous ? You wouldn't care ? " Chanhee fearfully inquired , feeling like he'd just been stabbed in the gut . Was that Byunghun's way of testing his fidelity ? If so , he would say it was rather a cruel one . If it wasn't .. If he truly meant those words .. 

" How could you even think I wanted that ? "  Unable to contain himself anymore , Chanhee snapped as he roughly gripped the younger's shoulders and gazed at his eyes dead on , determined to know how such repulsive thoughts could even cross his lover's mind . 

" I don't have the right to get jealous , Chanhee ! Not when I can't offer you anything ! " Slapping the elder's hands away , Byunghun vehemntly retorted back , his answer shocking the other too much that his mouth hung open spilling no words in response .

Their eyes remained locked , niether saying anything , out of pain , shock or unwillingness , they had no idea . However , one feeling lingered in the air plaguing the once pure atmosphere of the kitchen ..

Betrayal .

Chanhee has never thought of leaving Byunghun for physical pleasure and hearing otherwise , so brutal and lucid , made him feel betrayed . How could it be ? After all of the pain they've endured together , why would Chanhee want to pursue someone else ? He'd never considered the possibility . He couldn't imagine himself with any one else . If he wanted , he'd have done so a long time ago . And he would never lie about it . Did Byunghun honestly think that he wanted ual pleasure and maybe even satisfied himself in secret , never telling the younger about it , out of pity ?

How ?

Was that his worth ?

sure he was a man with needs but .. How clouded must Byunhun's judgement be for him to think that such thing was the only thing he wanted in  a relationship ?

They couldn't be intimate together for a reason and it was far from him wanting someone else . It was all because of the younger's health . Chanhee put that into consideration . So why couldn't Byunghun give him the benefit of the doubt ? 

Byunghun , on the other hand , felt so bitter that the one thing that first crossed Chanhee's mind as he emerged , was how wrong it was for the younger to exert some effort . It felt like someone had just ripped his heart apart . Like Chanhee wanted to deprive him of any semblace of normality .. Like he didn't want them to be normal .. He just wanted  him to stay bedridden .. He didn't want them to enjoy breakfast like any couple would .. why ? The only explanation was that he didn't view Byunghun as a lover anymore so it was okay not to do what couples usually do . Why couldn't he support him ? Why couldn't he smile and say he was proud of him ?  Byunghun finally knew why .. He was asking for too much . 

31 March , 2017 .

1518 words excluding author's note . A few lines were written beforehand but I can't recall when .. during 2016 , I guess . Any ways , I'm thoroughly overjoyed that I could finally update this . However , I also feel like face palming because I can't seem to find a closure for this and instead of this being the last update , it seems that I'll have to rack my brain for yet another chapter . Sighs *

It's very short which is making me doubt my inspiration right now but at least it's progress , right ?