Delirious

The Light Beneath A Shadow

Kim Jongin swallowed the chicken that he'd been chewing as time seemed to freeze. He had some grease around his mouth which made his lips look unnaturally shiny and ridiculously attractive, Kyungsoo couldn't look away from the younger boy, stunned. It was almost as if his neck muscles were no longer connected to his brain.

"Kai?" the urge to rub his eyes was strong, increbily strong. Kim Jongin's love for chicken was legendary, all Exo fans knew this but this was unexpected. His words echoed across the small restaurant, not that it mattered since no one was there. It seemed like celebrities also had lives, Kyungsoo mused. They just preferred to go out when they knew they wouldn't be seen. It seemed realistic though. Rather than getting mobbed, wearing a face mask and going out in the dark seemed like a safer alternative.

However, the chances of personally bumping into someone famous was rare so he clearly didn't have an average person's luck. It seemed like him and Kim Jongin were somehow tied together. In the last few weeks he'd interacted with the boy more than some people got to do in their entire lives. It was nerve wracking since his mouth and brain were never linked during those times so a great impression was something that he was aware was non-existant.

Jongin hurriedly wiped his lips with the back of his hand, the action made Kyungsoo wince. Maintaining cleanliness was something that he placed above most things and it looked like the younger star didn't share the same thoughts.

"Hi D.O.," he smiled self consciously, playing with the rim of the plate. Kyungsoo was surprised that he was recognised, the guy had thousands of fans sites dedicated to him alone and girls lining up to spend a second in his presense. If that wasn't fame, he didn't know what was.

He thought that after the fan sign, he'd be erased from the dancers memory completely but was now proven wrong.

"You remember me?" He couldn't help asking incredulously, eyes widened with disbelief. At this point he was standing in front of the blond boy.

"Yeah...I mean sure. You have really unique features,"

The raven didn't know whether those words were said mockingly or not but he could hear those taunts from his childhood coming back, ringing in his head. 'Owl boy, fish lips and bug' were just the standard.

However Jongin didn't seem like a spiteful person so Kyungsoo didn't take offense. Instead he sat opposite the other boy while waiting for his order, not really knowing where to look. Looking at someone while they were eating was rude right? But then again, so was blatantly ignoring them and he'd noticed that the blond had stopped eating completely. Maybe the blond was shy.

"So you....like chicken?"

He mentally groaned at the conversation starter. This was the real reason he didn't have many friends. Not that he had minded before today. But now that his skills were put to the test, he found that he was lacking. Surprisingly the dancer laughed joyously at his stupid question.

"Definitely! Chicken is the best food in the world, perfect fried, boiled, roasted. I could live off it for days," he exclaimed, voice rising in pitch which showed Kyungsoo that he clearly wasn't lying and someone really could feel that deeply about chicken. But was he allowed to eat it regularly, as an idol? It seemed like companies were strict with things like weight, perhaps Jongin just had an extremely fast metabolism and was given a leeway.

"Don't you have to eat healthy? To maintain a healthy weight and stuff?"

He was genuinely curious, and whenever he was he rapidly fired off questions one after the other.The question may have been a little intrusive but Jongin just waved his hand, unconcerned.

"Sure you do but I don't gain weight very easily. Besides, what they don't know won't hurt them," he gave him a joking wink that relaxed the atmosphere immediately.

Kyungsoo at first assumed a lot about Jongin. Especially when it came to his personality. He'd thought that there would be an untouchable air around him or it would be hard to actually have a conversation with him, but he was completely wrong.

Kim Jongin had an easy going air around him followed by kind eyes that seemed to light up whenever he was excited. But moreover, Kyungsoo the recluse was actually contributing to a conversation.

That's right, he, Do Kyungsoo was actually conversing (quite successfully too) with someone that he had technically met today. What had the world come to?

"So what to you study? You're in university right?" Jongin asked, taking a humongous bite of a chicken leg after the question.

"Electrical Engineering," he answered curtly, voicing coming out a lot lower than he intended.

"Woah! That sounds difficult. I bet you must be really smart then," Jongin commented, sounding impressed taking another huge bite of his wing but keeping his attention focused sold on Kyungsoo.

"Not really, I always wanted to be a chef..." he trailed off, staring at a spot behind Jongin's shoulder while wondering why he'd just disclosed his lifelong dream to the other boy, "unfortunately, you need money to survive in this world and that includes getting a stable job," sighing and shrugging his shoulders, he saw that Jongin had paused mid chew and was looking at him with a thoughtful expression.

"I don't think so," he finally replied, after swallowing. "If you really love something, go for it whether or not it pays well. When I took up dancing no one supported me because they knew that the likelihood of me making it was low. But you know what? Even if I didn't make it, I'd still be happy cause I'd be doing what I love the most."

By the end of the passionate yet moving mini lecture, Jongin's face was slightly red and he looked a bit breathless. Looking at his conviction and convincing speech, Kyungsoo wondered if the younger was right.

As much as he enjoyed working with numbers, was he forsaking his happiness for at future that he wasn't really looking forward to?

One of his major reasons for taking that degree was so that in a few years he could go home and show his good for nothing family just how much he had achieved without them. But was that all for nothing? Were a few weeks (days, actually who was he kidding? Most likely years) of sadistic satisfaction worth a lifetime of boredom?

He didn't know. Not yet anyway.

"I don't know," he mumbled, unsure.

"Just think about it. On your instagram you've posted a lot of cooking stuff and it really suits you."

Jongin sheepishly rubbed the back of his head when he realised that he gave away the fact that he watched numerous videos and actually remembered that they existed.

"Sorry...I can get a bit too caught up in things. I'm sure you don't need a lecture.." he laughed awkwardly, looking slightly ashamed of himself. He didn't blame him, they'd only met recently and he was already giving the older boy life advice. No one had ever done that before.

"No, I think you're right. If I'm not happy right now, what makes me think I will be in the future?" Kyungsoo nodded gently, his eyes reflecting his gratitude. No one had ever shown so much concern about what he wanted and to seeing that made his heart warm slightly.

The grin Jongin gave him in return almost made his heart jolt. He looked overjoyed, no...ecstatic. It made his eyes crinkle and revealed a row of shiny white teeth that left him feeling slightly awed. How could someone really look that breathtaking? While most of the world existed as mere mortals, you had people like Jongin whose looks would be enough to start wars in the past.

"That's great! You know...you-you're not like most fans I've spoken to. It feels like you don't even know who I am." His blunt words caused Kyungsoo to choke on thin air.

Trust me, I'm a fan alright. The fact that I can recognise you all by ears, hands or legs proves that much already. And as for my YouTube history, well nobody needs to know, Kyungsoo thought ironically, mentally chuckling in his head and feeling grateful that Jongin couldn't read minds.

"Sorry, how do you want me to talk to you?" Kyungsoo raised an eyebrow, "Ohhh Kaiiii I love you so so so much, please tell me you love me back! That would mean the world to me and-" he would have kept going in that high pitched falsetto voice if Jongin wasn't laughing so hard that it looked like he couldn't breathe.

"Sto....stop. That's not what-..what I meant,"

The only reason they were both cracking up was because those were the exact words the girl in front of him in the line had said and that the words sounded ridiculous coming from the short boy. Once the laughter had died out Jongin spoke again.

"Leave them alone, some of them get over excited and nervous. But I meant that I'm glad that you don't really tip toe around me and talk to me like you would, you know.. a friend,"

"You're different from what I expected as well. I thought you'd be a lot more guarded and mysterious."

"Aaand?" he leaned in to get a better hear.

"I was completely wrong. You're like a puppy,"

Jongin pouted at that, making him look a lot more like the small creatures, not that he minded he told Kyungsoo. He spoke about how Dogs were his favourite animals and if only he had more free time to look after his own pets back home with his parents. He only got to see them once every few months due to his schedule which was disappointing, especially since they grew so rapidly. He'd been trying to make more of an effort to see them but they#d just had a comback, making it difficult.

"Kyungsoo, your food's done!" The owner called from the counter and Kyungsoo reluctantly stood up, not really interested in the food anymore. He nodded to Jongin, a gesture that could mean different things depending on the person. But in Kyungsoo speak, it meant I'll be right back. He was a simple guy.

He took all the bags, made brief conversation with the old man about how his classes were going and paid for the monstrous amount of food that he'd be pigging out on tonight.

He walked back to Jongin's table with the bags in tow and sat opposite the other man once again.

They started off with some small talk that led to multiple cheesy jokes (all from Jongin of course, Kyungsoo would never be seen dead telling bad jokes) that never failed to make the black haired boy smile and shake his head.

At the back of his mind, he knew that he had to go. The food was getting cold and Myungsoo was waiting for him but he couldn't bring himself to leave Jongin's presence. It was like his body was being physically held in place.

Even when the sky got even darker and there wasn't anymore chicken on Jongin's plate, they kept talking.  About their favourite colours, hobbies, Exo members and anything else that they could think of.

"....and then Chanyeol hyung put the hair removal cream all over his head before getting in the shower and he screamed so loud when he washed it off. I still have the video," Jongin giggled, eyes full of mirth and mischief. Kyungsoo gaped in shock, Chanyeol must have been traumatised! He was so impressed.

"And then what? Did he find out it was you and Sehun?" He wished that he could have witnessed it or that they'd post it online but understood why they didn't. It was way too embarrassing.

"No!" Jongin laughed even harder, slapping his thighs as he gripped the table, "he still suspects Baekhyun. He's so lucky that this happened before debut or he'd be dead,"

Kyungsoo couldn't help himself, he joined in. Imagining Chanyeol's horrified face and petrified wails made him laugh even harder.

"Damn it, I wish I could have seen it happen. You should have shared it, it would have been a hit," he breathed heavily, pointing out that fact after he calmed himself down a little.

"I was planning to at first....but then," Jongin's eyes grew panicked and he leaned in, "he threatened to flush my Krong plushie down the toilet if I so much as showed anyone,"

"You like Pororo too?!" Kyungsoo squealed, his whole life, he'd never met a single adult other than him who watched the cartoon. The entire day kept getting better and better, it was like one crazy dream that he'd imagined up to escape the dreary reality he was actually encompassed by.

"Like it? I love it," Jongin emphasised, voice taking on a dreamy quality.

"Same!" he shouted, practically bouncing on his seat.

"Really? I thought I was the only one. Everyone I know says it's for babies," he shrugged, sounding a little put off.

"Oh well, they're the ones missing out," Kyungsoo commented, numb to all the Pororo hating people in the world by now. The biggest one being Myungsoo. Crap, Myungsoo.

His eyes widened. He didn't even register Jongin's enchanting laugh as he remembered his most likely livid friend who was still waiting for him. By now, the other boy was probably assuming he had been murdered then dumped in a nearby trashcan.

He was known for being dramatic and Kyungsoo was definitely not looking forward to returning to his worried roommate and suffering his wrath for the entire night.

"Shoot, I just remembered that my roommate's waiting for me at home. He's probably wondering where I am by now," he stood to get up, picking up his discarded bags with him, wished Jongin a hasty goodnight and hurried out. Jongin gave him an unsure wave just as he left the shop. It was a messy, uncoordinated one that didn't fail to make Kyungsoo smile. Cute. Kim Jongin was practically a seven year old in the body of a fully functioning adult.

In hindsight, he should have left in a nicer, less rushed way but he didn't. He was definitely more of an 'act now, think later' person. Now, while walking back to his room, he was thinking about it and facepalming.

But in actuality, hanging with Kim Jongin was wonderful. Talking to him was so different from talking to anyone else he knew. It was exhilarating, exciting and kept him alert the entire time. It was as if Jongin knew exactly what to say to get him out of his shell and actually relax, telling him funny stories and using little questions to make sure he felt included in the conversation.

Realistically speaking however, he knew that something like this would never happen again. He wasn't stupid. The boy was famous, untouchable and he was just normal. Not that he usually minded his plain self, but just being near Jongin made him feel lacking in so many aspects. It was as if the star oozed potential and power. He didn't. ​If there was anything he oozed, it'd be a little bug called ordinary.There was no point lying to himself, that got a person nowhere in life.

No, this was definitely a one time thing, Kyungsoo should just cherish the memory of today for the rest of his life and move on from it. After all, most fans never even got to see their idols up close much less have a full on conversation with them just flowed in all the right ways.

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NinaLi
#1
Chapter 5: Omgggg I strumbled upon this by accident and it's cute! I hope you have not abandoned this completely!
Squalo_Bloodreil98 #2
Chapter 5: I thought I read the wrong fanfic so I click the fanfic so many times... (-_-)
floralnori
#3
Chapter 4: As much as I love the OTP moments (and I freakin' love the OTP moments) I'm really enjoying Kyungsoo's normal, average, university student life. So bring on the project trio and roommate Myungsoo.
buttersugar
#4
Chapter 4: Just wanna say dat I can't wait for the next update. Kaisoo moviedate yeay!
shinjuike #5
Chapter 2: MMMMMMBOOOOIIII THIS IS AMAZING (also my gay appreciates u making krystal gay w/ Amber they're honestly my otp of otps lmao)
floralnori
#6
Chapter 2: Yea! They meet for the first time and Jongin recognizes Kyungsoo. I love that they meet again at a fried chicken restaurant. Can't wait for the next chapter!
floralnori
#7
Chapter 1: This is one of my favorite story lines -- fan meets celebrity! And I feel so connected with Kyungsoo already since he had such a horrible childhood but is trying to move past it in adulthood. I just want good things for him, good things like Kim Jongin. I can't wait for the next chapter!
FayeValentine
#8
Chapter 1: I'm excited for more! >.<
shinjuike #9
Chapter 1: I was actually just thinking about how I wanted to read a FIC like this and then appeared!!

Amazing start, I cannot wait to see where it goes from here. You're an amazing author :)