This is a series of one-shots inspired by the lyrics of Congratulations by DAY6 - You could give it a listen while you read! 

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Now, you won’t even pick up my calls

Instead of you, I hear a dull voice.

 

December - 2011

 

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Jessica, with much hesitation, picks her phone up and stares at the rectangular metal block that in itself was light but sat like a heavy burden on her petite hands.

 

She unlocks it and taps on the phone app only to stare at the already loaded contact she was to call.

 

Taeyeonnie <3 read the phone on top in bold letters.

 

With an uneasy little sigh, she shakily taps on the “Call” button and tensely holds the thing up to her ear and listens to its ring. Every repeating one making her all the more anxious.

 

Why was it that she felt so pressured when calling someone she’d known for almost a decade now? Someone who she’d shared a bed with at one point, someone who knew every secret she hid under her otherwise unbreakable exterior, someone who had loved her so tenderly, someone who she thought she’d spend the rest of her life with.

 

“Hello?” answers the stale, emotionless voice from the other side of the phone, effectively snapping Jessica out of her trance.

 

“T-Taeyeon..?” Jessica blurts out in a wobbly voice, she could almost see Taeyeon raising her eyebrow on the other side.

 

“What is it?” Asks Taeyeon blandly.

 

“I-It’s Yuri’s birthday next Friday. The party’s at the dorm.” she starts off slowly and jittery.

 

“Get her a gift or something.” she finally finishes, incredibly annoyed at herself and her lack of being able to speak.

 

“Okay.” Taeyeon says, still as unexcited as ever.

 

And just as Jessica’s about to ask her if they could talk for a while she’s met with a grim “Bye.” followed by that damned beep.

 

Her heavy arms limp to her sides as she stares, with blurry eyes, at the stupid picture they’d taken of themselves in 2008 which sat on the coffee table collecting dust.

 

She raises her hand to look at her phone, Taeyeon’s contact information intact.

 

With a shaky finger, she edits the girl's name as the lump in starts to become bigger and bigger.

 

Taeyeon.

 

Better.

 

And with that, she flings it over to the other side of the couch and looks at the happy picture one last time before slamming its face down onto the glass table, for it to never be seen again.

 

Oh, how she wished she could do that to herself.

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Congratulations, you’re so amazing

Congratulations, how could you be so fine?

How could you trample on me?

I see your smiling face, I guess you forgot everything.

 

March - 2012

 

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“And the winner is,” the man delivers to the large audience which listened intently for him to finish, “Girl’s Generation!”

 

Cheers, claps and screams from all around ring inside Jessica’s ears as she and the other girls automatically lift themselves off of their seats with smiles plastered onto their faces.

 

Jessica follows the trail of Yoona’s dress to lead her up to the stage as she walks while looking down at the ground with Hyoyeon behind her.

 

As they maneuver themselves onto the stage, the man hands over the enormous golden trophy to Taeyeon, the leader, who if Jessica knew her, had just mentally started preparing her winners speech.

 

Taeyeon, with all smiles, takes hold of the thing that was nearly half as big as she was, and turns over to the mic and starts blabbering something or the other with glee.

 

Jessica merely stares in her direction, her lips pursed softly as she stands alone at the back.

 

Her eyes fall onto a hand that wrapped itself around her leaders back, a hand that once belonged to herself, once.

 

And just as she’s about to look away, Taeyeon’s hands wrap themselves around the other girl’s torso.

 

Tears start to cloud Jessica’s vision as those damned memories make their way back to her at the most ungodly moment.

 

---

 

July 2008

 

Taeyeon weeps into Jessica’s shoulder as the two oldest members form an embrace on the stage after giving the surprised audience a messy speech for winning their very first award as a group.

 

Jessica wraps her arms around the girl and tries every possible thing to comfort her while awkwardly holding the bouquet of flowers given to them.

 

“I love you Sica yah.” Taeyeon blubbers into the girl’s ear, clearly an emotional and overwhelmed mess.

 

“I love you too Taengoo.” Jessica whispers back, not wanting to leave her arms anytime soon.

 

Who knew that their embrace wouldn’t last forever? Least of all Jessica?

 

---

 

“Unnie! Why are you crying!? You’re the one who said we’d win today for sure!” whispers a playful Yoona into Jessica’s ears, snapping her out of her trance.

 

She looks at the girl with blurry eyes and smiles, a pathetic one, before involuntarily turning over to look at Taeyeon again.

 

This time, however, the girl hugged someone else, held someone else, loved someone else.

 

Seeing Taeyeon’s smile made her nothing but miserable, and feeling miserable about seeing Taeyeon happy made her feel all the more pathetic.

 

She couldn’t win either way, could she?

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Huh, I saw your picture on the Internet

Are you that happy? Your smile goes up to your ears

For me, my heart still hurts every time I breathe.

 

September - 2013

 

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Jessica sits snuggled on her leather couch, emotionlessly scrolling through Instagram, double-tapping every picture on her feed without thinking twice, and then...her finger comes to a halt when a certain someone’s picture comes by.

 

“In Hawaii with my princess <3”

 

Taeyeon smiles brightly under the sun with her princess by her side.

 

The princess lightly pecked Taeyeon’s cheek in the picture and held her as though she’d belonged to her forever.

 

Jessica’s heart sinks and she scrolls past it trying to erase it from her thoughts, but to no avail it keeps springing itself back up in her mind as though she was the one taking the picture.

 

In haste, she clicks her phone off and off it goes as it flies over to her feet, almost tumbling off and falling to the ground. Not that she cared.

 

She grabs the cushion and covers her face with it, holding onto it so as to not sink into a tub full of tears that were fighting hard to pour out of her tired eyes.

 

She takes in a deep breath and as she lets go, all command that she had over her body comes crashing down as she ungracefully breaks down into a sobbing mess.

 

Remember when I was your princess?

 

The cushion, which was no stranger to her woes, feels every ounce of her pain fall onto itself in anguish.

---

Leave me

Go to her

As if a girl like me never existed

You’ve fallen in love.

 

August - 2014

 

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Jessica brushes her hand through her hair with a small pout on her face while sitting on the ground, her back supported by the sofa behind her on which sat Yuri who involuntarily massaged Jessica's shoulders.

 

The girls were gathered in the living room to tune into the first broadcast of Yoona’s new movie, the girl sat unceremoniously on the sofa surrounded by her members from all directions.

 

“Ahh, it’s starting!” Yuri says excitedly as she presses hard on Jessica’s shoulders, the girl, however, paid no heed and stared blankly at the TV screen.

 

For what seemed like the nth time that day, she cranes her neck to see Taeyeon sitting on the armchair, cuddled up in an embrace that wasn’t with her, which, even after all these years, she thought it ought to be.

 

Serene music starts to play and everyone turns to look at the TV to watch the Introductory song. Jessica gulps and forces herself to smile, after all, Yoona was one of the people she loved the most.

 

--

 

50 minutes in, and Yuri was clutching onto a cushion, threatening to start bawling at any moment and so did Sunny.

 

Taeyeon however, and Jessica noticed, had fallen asleep, the embrace which pained Jessica so much, still intact.

 

Something happens in the movie, Jessica’s not sure what, which leads to Yuri throwing her cushion straight at the TV, which then bounced back and fell straight onto Jessica.

 

Yuri noticeably starts to bawl, accompanied with Sunny and Sooyoung who started to sniffle.

 

At this point, Jessica’s eyes automatically made their way to Taeyeon, who seemed to have woken up and had a soft smile on her face.

 

The smile, of course, was reserved for that one person. That one person, who Jessica could never be.

 

Shouldn’t she have learnt by now?

 

Apparently not for yet another cushion listens to her silent misfortune.

 

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I hope you liked it. xx. Please give me your reviews in the comments! I've mainly started this project to improve my writing so I'd look some feedback! Thanks for reading <3 xx.