There is never a simple way of confessing to one's crush-it's a hard thing to do. Anyone can relate because there has never been a time that anyone hasn't had a hard time working up the courage to tell that special someone they truly feel about them.

 

     Sadly, I know that feeling all too well. The number of rejections that I've received over the course of my high school career and even in college is more than anyone can count. It has come to the point that I don't even try anymore. I don't try to dress cute anymore, all I can think about is the problem of trying to get through class and ultimately college.         That's all I'm looking forward to and I know I'll eventually have to face the real world and maybe, just maybe meet the man of my dreams, the love of my life, but that won't be until years later. So why even hope or dream now? I can't even date anyone. In high school, I had so many crushes, but never did I once date anyone. While all my friends had boyfriends all four years or had a different boyfriend each year, I had none. I would like someone but they would never like me back. Why? I don't know. Probably because I wasn't pretty enough, or I simply wasn't their type. Whatever the case, I'd move on. Heartbroken? Definitely, but I survived, didn't I?        No matter how many times my friends would help me and push me towards them, it would all end in disaster. Up to my senior year, I promised myself I wouldn't like anyone, I wouldn't fall for anyone or confess to anyone. I was sick and tired of the heartbreak, of crying myself to sleep every night because I thought there was something wrong with me. I just didn't understand and honestly, I still don't.        Senior year... they say it is the best year of your high school career. I won't lie, it was. I loved every waking moment of senior year because it meant I wouldn't have to deal with high school anymore. I would graduate and move on to the next chapter in my life along with my friends.        The beginning of senior year was perfect. I didn't like anyone, I was actually happy. While my friends were happy with their relationships, I was happy that I was single because I didn't have to worry about giving the other person attention or any of the dramas that come with relationships. Though deep down, I yearned for love, affection, hugs and random acts of kindness. Knowing better I'd always try to push any thoughts like that to the back of my head and simply focus on what I wanted. Which was to get accepted into a good university, hopefully with a scholarship.         As the year progressed, of course, I couldn't control my heart. I started liking someone and not just any someone. He was one of the most popular guys in school. Lee Sunghwa. To simply put it, he was perfect. His hair was fairly long, enough for him rock different hairstyles. His skin was smooth and shiny; it always seemed like he was shining. He was tall, probably around 5'11 and very lean. Of course, he would be lean because he was an athlete, a star player at that. On top of all that, he was a transfer from the States, so he knew English perfectly. An added bonus to all that was that he was also a top student. When he transferred, he knocked out our number one student from his spot. Of course, he wasn't all too happy because he held number one for all four years, but there was nothing he could do about it, Lee Sunghwa simply had the grades.        Towards the middle of the year, many girls tried winning his heart, but to no avail. If the prettiest girls in school couldn't win his heart than why should I even try? I kept my distance and only admired him from afar. Although my friends told me to give it a try, I refused because I wasn't emotionally ready for another heartbreak.        Just like that, senior year came and went. It was already time for graduation and I couldn't be any happier because not only did I get to leave that hell hole, I could put away the anxiety that I was holding on because of Sunghwa. He always made me nervous. Just seeing him in the hallways or anticipating of seeing him play sports.        Lucky, we took different routes. I went off to college and from what I heard he went off to pursue his love and passion for music. I even heard he went back to the States to realize his dreams.        Me? I majored in Business with a minor in English and Chinese. I guess, anyone could say I was well off because I worked for a large Business Firm in the Gangnam district. I loved what I did and it was what I wanted to do , so I was more than happy. I didn't need a man to keep me happy, or so I thought.        "Ri!" one of my closest friends called my name as she came inside the cafe and stood to wave at the entrance with a huge grin on her face.        I hadn't seen her since she decided to move to New York to pursue her love for fashion. Now she was very much successful in that field. Having worked with Calvin Klein himself and other famous designers.        "Hwa Eun!" I waved back happily as I stood up and she walked over to the table that I was at.         We hugged each other in a tight hug. It felt nice to finally be able to see her, hear her voice and simply be in her presence. She was always my go to no matter what and usually talked me out of my insane or bad ideas, sometimes my ideas were both insane and bad.        "How have you been!" she exclaimed as she let go and grabbed my shoulders as she inspected me.        Laughing, I grabbed her arms and looked at her.        "I"m doing fine,"        "What a relief," she sighed as she let go and sat down. I had already ordered our drinks so I hoped I got the right one. It has been 3 years since I last saw her so maybe her favorite stuff has changed because she lived in New York. I didn't know.        "Oh! Green Tea! My fave!" she chimed as she took a long sip of the frozen drink.        Smiling happily, I looked at her because even though she was gone for 3 years, she hasn't changed at all.        "I'm glad you like it,"        "I love it!"        We continued talking and catching up with one another. It was fun, it was as if we weren't apart at all.        "Ri, guess what!" she smirked as her eyes shown brightly.        "What?" I asked curiously. Wondering what made Hwa Eun suddenly so mysterious.        "Do you remember Lee Sunghwa?" she leaned forward as her long brown hair spilled forward brushing the table.        How could I forget someone like him? Even though I only knew him for a year, it was enough for me to fall head over heels for him in high school. Okay, I didn't actually know him, but I knew who he was.        "What about him?" I asked casually, trying to hide my curiosity of where she was taking this.        "Well, I heard he came back to Korea and is either signing or has signed with a label," she said sitting up and looked at me. Wide-eyed, I looked at her kind of shocked but at the same time, I shouldn't be because that was expected of him.        "Good for him," I shrug as I picked up my own drink and take a sip of it.        "Not only that but if I'm right it's AOMG. You know that label with Jay Park!" Hwa Eun gushed. I almost spat my drink out if it wasn't for the strong desire of actually wanting to drink it. Swallowing hard, I looked at her for a long minute.        "What?"        "You heard me! Jay Park! The Jay Park! Can you believe this!"        "How do you even know that?" I asked as I grabbed a napkin and wiped the sides of my mouth.        Smirking, she set her drink aside and leaned forward again as she gestured for me to do the same. Hesitantly, I leaned forward and she grabbed my arms to pull me further in.        "I got hired as a stylist there. At first, I didn't want to because I wanted to go to SM or JYP, BUT they told me they would pay me double because they liked my fashion sense and said it was their style. Which I thought was a complete lie at first because I never heard of AOMG and didn't want to work for a no-name label, UNTIL I heard Jay Park was the CEO!" she squealed as she shook my shoulders.        "Hwa Eun. Please," I begged her as I tried to pry her grubbing hands off my shoulders. She was making dizzy and the fact that Sunghwa is back and that she's going to be working with them wasn't helping.        "So what?"         "That means... I'll be working with Sunghwa a lot. Maybe I don't know, but you get the point. Not that I like him anyway. You very well know, I like Jay Park so you don't have to worry about that because I know you still have feelings for him even though he practically doesn't know you exist. Also, about him yet. Just that he's the newest artist under the label," Hwa Eun explained. When it came to any kind of information, Hwa Eun was your woman. She could get all kinds of information and you wouldn't know how the important part was that she got it.     Sighing, I honestly didn't know what to say or do. Good for her of finding a job upon her arrival to Korea. I couldn't really say I was jealous because that was her job, but maybe I was jealous of the fact she was going to be seeing him a lot. Although I haven't see Sunghwa for over five years now, I knew he hasn't changed at all. I remember him as if it were just yesterday.            "Yah Ri. What are you thinking about?" Hwa Sun said as she kicked me under the table.        "Ow! That hurts!" I rubbed my shin as I glared at her. That was another thing about her. She sometimes got a little physical when she didn't get the attention that she wanted or get her way. A horrible trait but it came in handy sometimes.        "What are you thinking?" she pressed.        "Nothing," I said as I sat back up.        Rolling her eyes, she huffed and crossed her arms as she looked at me, which was starting to make me nervous because she tilted her head to the side and then to another side before she sat up as she continued to look at me. Gulping hard, I tried drinking my drink but she was really making me paranoid.        "Come on," she stood up.        "Where?"        "You'll see," she smirked as she grabbed my arm and I set my drink down as she pulled me from my seat and dragged me out the door.          "W-Why are we here?" I gulped as we stood outside of the AOMG building. That was when it hit me—she dragged me here in hopes we would run into SUNGHWA!        She only smirked as she grabbed my arm but I refused to budge.        "I'm not going in,"        "Don't be a party pooper. I just want to sure you around," she batted her eyelashes as she pouted.        "No way. I know what you're up to. No way in hell," I said trying to pry her grubby hands off of me, but she wasn't about to let go anytime soon.        "Come on! You don't even know if he's there or not,"        "I don't care,"        She sighed as she let me go and I glanced at her before starting to walk the way we had come from, but before I could get any further, I felt her hands grab onto my arm and yank me towards the building.        "Yah! Let me go!" I scream as she pulls me to the entrance we go through the doors. I couldn't believe that Hwa Eun was that strong! She must have been working out while in New York, though her small doesn't show signs of muscles or anything.        "Ah, now was it that hard?" she smiled in content as she wrapped her arm around mine and we walk further into the building. To say the least, the building was speculator. Though