MASSIVE TRIGGER WARNING for the beginning.

And I have watched this compilation of Vines by Exo o at least four times in the past ten hours. It's half an hour long but so worth the time. It gets offensive in certain areas, though, so be prepped. Anyways, I'm in love with it. Lots of Chen screeching and Baek-shaming and duck jokes ("duck")

I am a human being capable of doing terrible things.

-AWOLNATION

Rule one: don't look up.

Chanyeol's father had beat those words into him at a young age. Keep your head down. Listen. Don't talk back. And don't expect things to be any better. 

And the first time Chanyeol ever saw someone die, it was those words that had rang between his ears.

Chanyeol was eleven when a traitor to Mr. Park's services was brought before him. Mr. Park kicked the man's legs out from under him and, having his hands tied behind him, smashed his nose on the ground. A gurgling cough brought blood up on the concrete of the underground parking lot, the color of dark wine under the dim flickering lights. One of the Park henchmen kicked the man in the side, and another dragged him by the collar of his shirt up into a seated position.

Meanwhile, Mr. Park laid a hand on Chanyeol's shoulder. 

"You're a young man now," Mr. Park said quietly. "It's time for you to see these things."

One of the henchmen--the one who had smashed the security cameras, Chanyeol remembered--tapped a baseball bat against the ground, letting it drag and echo ominously in the lot. Someone else tossed a crowbar.

The four of Mr. Park's men who had come gathered around the helpless man on the ground.

When the first one raised his bat, Chanyeol closed his eyes and tipped his face to the ground. After a sickening crack, Mr. Park squeezed his son's shoulder, and Chanyeol opened his eyes. A spatter of blood sprayed out, ending an inch away from Chanyeol's shoe.

One thwump followed another, but the man never screamed once.

Chanyeol didn't look up.

When Yixing went to visit Luhan again, the prisoner was livid.

"How the f did he find your house?" Luhan demanded, out of his chair and leaned in so much that his face almost touched the glass.

Yixing looked around. "Chinese!"

"Oh. Sorry." Luhan sat back down and waved at the guard on his side. "Xingxing, I don't know what to...I'd stay with you just in case, but..."

"That would do nothing. Jack s ."

Luhan groaned and rubbed his face. "This is bad."

"He called me Xingxing."

"Well, now we know that even though he's gone bats  insane, he remembers your nickname. Great. That helps us so much." Luhan slammed his hand down on the counter, prompting another glare from the guard.

"No, I mean--he said something about protecting me. What the f does that mean?"

"Doesn't he think the world's dirty, or something?" Luhan asked into the air, ignoring Yixing's question. "I don't--" He bit his lips and sighed.

A sudden urge to cry hit Yixing, and he leaned forward, heel of his hand pressed against the space between his eyes. "I'm f ed," he muttered.

"Oh, G-d, Xingxing, don't--don't cry." Luhan put his hand on the glass, looking two seconds away from bursting into tears himself. It had been so many years, but seeing the baby of his old group sad made him sad. And angry. Ready to tear someone's throat out of their living body.

Yixing smiled weakly and shook his hand, blocking his face from view. 

Luhan let his hand slide down the glass. "I promise you," he said. "If I can get out of this s hole, if I can help you, that's what I'm doing."

Baekhyun usually remembered his dreams. After all, it was hard to forget getting murdered in your sleep. They were strange enough for him to recall even days later, frightening enough to sometimes make him sleep on the mattress with Yixing for a few days.

This time was the worst.

He woke up to strong hands around his wrists, and his eyes opened to Chanyeol staring down at him in pale sunlight, brow furrowed. "Baek? What happened? You were kicking and screaming and--"

Baekhyun gasped for breath, heart rattling in his ribcage and throat raw from shouting. "Nightmare," he said, wrenching his hands free from Chanyeol's to push himself up to sitting position. "Ah, s . Oh, G-d." His face crumpled, and he shuddered, red eyes still staring out at him from murky shadows and spider legs still crawling over his arms. 

"Hey. Talk to me." Chanyeol moved to cross his legs, carefully taking Baekhyun's hands back in his. 

Baekhyun scooted forwards, then turned to sit on Chanyeol's legs, pulling the other man's long arms around him. "It started out okay," he said, burying himself in Chanyeol's thick sweater. "I'm by myself in a dark room and there are three candles, and the only pictures I've ever seen of my grandpa and dad are hanging on the wall. Two of the candles go out, and the fire on the only one left spreads to the entire room and everything catches fire except a little space..." Baekhyun made a circling motion with his hands. "A little space around me. And then this is where it changes. Most of the time, I wake up after this much but..."

Chanyeol was nodding against Baekhyun's head, and he stopped for a moment as the smaller man against his chest caught his breath.

"The fire turns black somehow, and it gets colder in the room but I can still see, like, fire, all around me and on the walls and ceiling. And in the middle of the fire in front of me, is my dad. He just appears, and he looks just like he did in the pictures I have of him...he starts screaming, and--oh G-d, it's the worst thing I've ever heard--he falls down and just turns into spiders that start crawling around and I can't see them in the fire and then they're crawling up me and I can't move--" 

Baekhyun's fingers tightened around Chanyeol's arm, and Chanyeol kissed him gently on the top of the head. "You don't have to keep talking."

"I couldn't move. And where my dad's head was, where his eyes were, there are two red eyes, just floating there, staring at me, and someone starts talking into my ear, but I don't understand any of it." Baekhyun slapped his ear, as if the hissing voice from a few minutes before was still there, a tiny mosquito cursing. "And then you woke me up."

"I'm glad I did." Chanyeol hugged Baekhyun closer. "On the bright side, it's already six in the morning. So you don't have to worry about trying to fall asleep again."

"Yeah."

They sat in the rising sun's light until Chanyeol's stomach growled.

"Oh." Chanyeol looked down, and Baekhyun rolled his eyes. 

"Ruin the moment, won't you," he said, moving to get out of the little cage Chanyeol had made around him. 

Abruptly, Chanyeol caught him under the chin, turning his head gently to the side, and kissed him.

Baekhyun froze, mind stopping--the exact opposite of what usually happened--and eyes going wide. He'd kissed people before--Jongdae, in fact, when Baekhyun was regrettably drunk--but Chanyeol kissing him was different. It felt deeper, more intimate. Safe.

Chanyeol pulled away, face reddening quickly. "S-sorry," he said. "That was a b-bad--"

Unexpectedly, Baekhyun started laughing, a stifled giggle snowballing into a roar. Chanyeol watched quietly, waiting for a punishment he almost knew was going to come. 

"R-remember when you tried to kiss me back at the school?" Baekhyun stuttered, trying not to fall off the bed from how hard he was laughing.

"I--yeah?"

Baekhyun wiped at a stray tear that had fallen from his eye. "You're such a dumb-ss." He grabbed Chanyeol's face with two hands, squishing his cheeks and laughing again at his bewildered expression.

Chanyeol frowned as best he could with his face squished in. "Whu're you drring?"

Baekhyun released the other man from his face death grip and leaned in to kiss him back.