Digital Love

Digital Love

#

Jongin stares at the tiny rectangular chip.

“No,” he says firmly, “no, seriously, Sehun, I’m not going to spend my only free night this week watching android .”

“Come on, it’ll be great.” His best friend wiggles the chip, which he’s holding up between his fingers, in Jongin’s face. “You’re surrounded by them all day anyway, it’s not like it’s something new--”

“It doesn’t mean I want to see them --uh-- that is--”

“,” Sehun finishes for him. Unhelpfully. “With big di--”

Jongin’s phone goes off, drowning out whatever Sehun had been about to say. He answers it quickly with a mental note of thanks to the universe. “Hello?”

Jongin,” Baekhyun’s familiar voice greets him. “I’ve got a fresh gig tonight, if you’re up for it.”

“What kind?” Jongin asks, ignoring Sehun mouthing but movie night!!! and gesturing wildly with his hands.

Five droids, all Delta-V models. Location’s down in Sector 23.” Baekhyun gives him a name and address. “Guy sounds desperate, so we’re charging him the premium rate. You get your usual cut, of course, five percent.”

“It’s the weekend, Baekhyun,” Jongin points out. “Give me ten percent.”

Seven percent,” Baekhyun replies over the line pleasantly. “Eight, if you get your pretty there in ten minutes.” Jongin makes a face at the clock he has on the wall. “Or I could always call Chanyeol--

“I’ll take it,” Jongin says quickly. He’s not about to hand over a job involving V-droids to Chanyeol.

Awesome! Knew I could count on you!” Baekhyun replies a trite too cheerfully. “Now get moving, we don’t want to lose this client.” He hangs up on Jongin.

“You know,” Sehun begins, as Jongin lowers the phone, “I could just talk to my dad. Get you an interview at the firm or something--”

Jongin brushes off the offer casually. “I’m not cut out for fancy suits, Sehun,” he jokes, although he’s feeling a little guilty. After all, he’s never told Sehun the truth. “Anyway, I gotta get to work. We’ll do movie night tomorrow, alright? I’ll even let you pick anything--”

“Anything?” There’s a glint in Sehun’s eye.

“--except ,” Jongin says, glaring at him.

Sehun sniffs. “You’re missing out on an artistic masterpiece, Jongin, you and your tiny di--”

Jongin quickly makes a beeline for the front door before Sehun can finish his sentence.



#

Jongin’s a Mechanic.

He doesn’t repair cars, however. His real job - not the one that’s currently registered under his name in the City’s records - is to repair robots. He’s not licensed, which technically makes what he’s doing illegal - but then again more than 60 percent of the Mechanics here aren’t either.

While some Mechanics prefer to operate alone, others, like Jongin, use agencies to source for work for them. Baekhyun is someone Jongin’s known since high school - so when he had set up his own agency, he had brought in Jongin and a few other friends onto his primary call list.

Jongin had never expected to fall into this line of work. For all his years of tinkering around in his father’s garage, fixing the household appliances, or building his first tiny robot - he had always had other dreams. But life is a little funny sometimes, perhaps a little cruel; plunging his dreams into the bitter cold abyss of reality - and so now Jongin is a Mechanic.

(At least he’s a damn good one, unlike Chanyeol who ends up accidentally breaking a client’s robot at least once every time.)

The address that Baekhyun’s given him leads him to a small factory in Sector 23, within the Manufacturing District. Jongin goes through the security scanner, and then finds himself inside the building.

He’s greeted by the manager, a serious-looking man with a tendency to look directly at Jongin as he speaks, who leads him to where the droids are stored. As they make their way through the building, walking past the assembly lines, Jongin notices that most, if not all of the workers seem to be droids - awkward looking and clunky with wheels attached at the bottom for easy mobility. They ignore Jongin and the manager, intensely focused on the task at hand as they were programmed to do.

“Are all your workers droids?” Jongin asks curiously. “No humans?”

“There were a few in the beginning,” the manager explains. “But the owner decided that since one droid could easily outperform three people on the assembly lines, he had all the human workers replaced.”

Jongin tries not to wince visibly when he hears that. With machines taking over even the most menial jobs out there, it’s no wonder there are so many disgruntled citizens, especially those who’ve recently been replaced by androids. While the voices of dissention have been kept suppressed, Jongin suspects it won’t be long before they grow louder and angrier.

Eventually, the manager leads him away from the section towards a small narrow corridor. They walk for several metres before he finally stops them in front of a door . “This is a storeroom, but it serves as a workspace when the machines need to be repaired,” he explains to Jongin. “The malfunctioning droids were moved here once they were shut down.” He presses a few numbers on the keypad next to the door, which slides open once it’s verified the access code, before stepping into the room.

Jongin follows him in and takes a quick look around. It’s definitely a storeroom; boxes have been stacked on the shelves along the walls, along with one or two machines that look similar to the ones he had seen at the assembly line earlier. There’s still enough space in the middle of the room, where a worktable has been placed and five cylindrical shaped droids are standing in a row, waiting to be repaired.

“What happened to them?” Jongin asks.

“One malfunctioned midway through production. The emergency protocol that was meant to activate and replace the droid immediately with another backup unit also failed and caused a chain reaction with the other droids along the same assembly line before they were finally shut down.”

“That’s a common problem among Delta-V units, but it’s not impossible to fix,” Jongin tells him. “Give me a couple of hours and I’ll have them working again in no time.”

Jongin gets to work immediately. He uses the worktable to set his equipment up and links the nearest droid to his laptop. While he’s running a complete scan of the droid’s system, he notices that the manager is still here, watching the proceedings with a curious look.

“I’m Jongin, by the way,” Jongin says, holding his hand out.

The manager looks taken aback. “Joonmyun,” he says. A second later, he reaches out and ends up giving Jongin’s hand a brief but firm shake.

“Joonmyun,” Jongin repeats, looking on in amusement as Joonmyun pulls his own hand back quickly. “How long have you been working here, Joonmyun?” He doesn’t usually chat with his clients, but there’s something intriguing about this one. Of course, it doesn’t hurt that he’s a good-looking man, even dressed as he is in a plain grey uniform which is a standard issue with all the factories. He’s a little shorter than Jongin, but there’s a kind of strength and confidence surrounding him that makes Jongin feel drawn to it.

“One year two months and four days and six hours,” Joonmyun says promptly.

Amused by how precise the response was, Jongin asks, jokingly, “No seconds?”

Joonmyun gives him a blank look.

Right, so maybe Joonmyun doesn’t have a sense of humor. After a few more minutes of awkward silence, Jongin makes another attempt at casual conversation.

“So are any other humans here besides you?” he asks, making another attempt.

“No.”

“So I guess it must be pretty lonely working here then.”

“Lonely?” A confused look appears on Joonmyun’s face. “Why would it be lonely?”

Jongin’s about to ask him what he means by that when a loud beeping noise interrupts him. He glances at his laptop to find that the scan is complete.

Joonmyun leaves him alone after that, indicating that he needs to get back to work, so Jongin’s left with no one to talk to but the ever-silent droids. He puts on some music, however, and with the songs blaring from his laptop speakers he continues scanning the rest of the droids.

It doesn’t take him long to figure out the cause of the malfunction, but it does take some time to reconfigure the subroutines so that it doesn’t happen again. Once he’s done, he checks on the rest of the droids. One of the them has a damaged circuit board, which Jongin doesn’t have a replacement for, so he makes a note to order a new one. The rest of the droids don’t seem to have any further issues, but he tweaks their subroutines anyway, just to be safe.

When he’s finally done with all the droids, Jongin begins packing his equipment. He’s about to step outside the room to look for Joonmyun when the manager shows up, as if on cue, and nearly bumps into Jongin.

Jongin quickly takes a step back too avoid being knocked over.

“Are you finished with the repairs?” Joonmyun asks, not realizing that he had almost bumped into Jongin.

“Almost - but there are a couple of things I still need to do.” Since it doesn’t look like Joonmyun’s going anywhere, Jongin decides go ahead and give him a quick run-down of what he’s done so far. Then, he pulls out his notepad, scribbles his number on it and tears the sheet off to hand it to Joonmyun. “I’ll put in a request to have the replacement parts shipped here in about a day or two. When they arrive, just ring me and I’ll be back here to finish the repairs.”

Joonmyun takes the offered scrap of paper, and scans Jongin’s messy handwriting curiously.

Clearing his throat, Jongin gestures at the door, which Joonmyun is currently blocking him from exiting.

It takes Joonmyun a few long moments of staring before he finally processes what Jongin’s referring to. Seemingly flustered, he stands aside to let Jongin pass. “I did not mean to stand in your way--” he begins, but Jongin waves it off casually.

“Don’t worry about it,” Jongin tells him, chuckling. “Anyway, don’t forget to call me, okay?”

“Okay.”



#

The replacement part arrives two days later and Jongin finds himself back at the factory. Joonmyun meets him again once he goes through the security scanner, before leading Jongin to the room where the damaged droid is kept.

This time, Joonmyun is a little less cooler towards Jongin, responding to his questions with far more candor that he had before. He still seems slightly too serious, his expression stiff and unsmiling, which prompts Jongin to attempt another joke - which falls flat again when Joonmyun gives him another blank look.

Jongin sets up his equipment and unpacks the box which the replacement board had been shipped in. As he removes the panel that allows him easy access to the droid’s internal system, once again he realizes that Joonmyun is lingering nearby, curiously watching Jongin work.

It’s only when Jongin is midway through the repairs when realizes that the damaged circuit board is stuck. No matter how hard he tries, he can’t pull it out of the droid - at least, not without yanking out half of the wires with it. Eventually he discovers that part of the clip that connects the board to the droid has melted, practically sealing it to the machine. All he needs to do is to reach in and remove the clip, but that’s when he runs into another problem: his fingers are too big to fit into the narrow space.

After several minutes, he lets out a frustrated sound and stands back, nursing his hand and fingers which are pinched and aching from the attempt. “Damn it,” he mutters.

To his surprise, Joonmyun speaks up. “Would you like me to assist you?”

Jongin’s about to decline when he pauses, noticing Joonmyun’s hands. “Can you hold up your hands?” he asks. Joonmyun complies, and Jongin adjusts his hands so that he can compare them against his own. “It might work.” He shows Joonmyun how to remove the clip before letting him take over, and watches as Joonmyun slips his hand into the narrow space. Trying to get a clearer view, Jongin leans closer and guides him carefully in a steady voice.

When Joonmyun successfully removes the clip, Jongin takes over from there, carefully extracting the circuit board. It doesn’t occur to him that they had been pressed shoulder to shoulder against each other until he asks Joonmyun to hand him one of his tools and he steps away to do so. Feeling a little disappointed as the loss of warmth, Jongin tries to focus on the task at hand instead.

It takes him another hour to fix the replacement and run a few more tests to make sure that everything is working perfectly. When he’s done, he packs up his equipment, and sends off a message to Baekhyun to update him that he’s completed the job.

As he waits for Baekhyun’s reply, he glances at Joonmyun.“Do you want to get something to eat?” he asks.

For the first time, Joonmyun blinks at him, as if he’s confused. “Eat?”

Jongin shrugs. “I skipped out on dinner, so I was planning to grab a bite. I thought you’d like to join me.” He sees Joonmyun’s face and then realizes that he’s made a mistake, that Joonmyun thinks that he’s hitting on him. “I mean, if you want to. I just figured you might like someone human to talk to, after all.”

“Someone--someone human,” Joonmyun repeats, stammering, before he quickly avoids Jongin’s gaze, looking down on the ground. “I do not-- I do not think I can do that.”

Feeling disappointed, Jongin tries to act nonchalant. “It’s fine,” he says, as cheerfully as he can. “Anyway, I should get going. Thanks again for helping earlier.” He holds out his hand.

When Joonmyun doesn’t take it, Jongin lets his arm drop. “Well, I’ll see you around, Joonmyun.”



#

Jongin’s about to sit down to a peaceful evening of cartoons and junk food when his phone rings.

He squints at the screen, noticing that it’s an unknown number. Curious, he answers the call hesitantly. “Hello?”

Hello?” There’s a brief pause. “Jongin?

“This is Jongin,” he replies. The voice on the other end sounds oddly familiar. “Who’s this?”

Joonmyun.” He almost drops the phone in his surprise. “Did I call you at a bad time?

“Joonmyun?” He hasn’t spoken to the other man since their awkward conversation - or rather, Jongin’s spectacular moment of rejection - last week. “Uh, it’s not a bad time. Just… why are you calling me?”

Is your offer is still open.

“Offer?” Jongin’s brows furrow in confusion.

To have a meal together.” There’s a brief pause on the other end. “If you would not mind.

Jongin closes his eyes. He’s just spent the last couple of days wallowing in self-pity over the rejection, and now Joonmyun is calling him instead and asking him out. It seems almost unreal.

Jongin? Is the offer no longer available?

“No-- wait no, I mean yes,” Jongin replies quickly, “yes, it is. And yes, let’s meet up.” He quickly gives Joonmyun directions to a park nearby. By the time he ends the call, he can’t help feeling a little excited and nervous about meeting up with Joonmyun.

The sun is beginning to set when Jongin shows up. Joonmyun is waiting for him by the promenade that runs alongside the park, looking around him in curiosity. This time, he’s dressed a little differently than the last two times they had met. Instead of the plain uniform, he’s wearing a dark-colored jacket over a shirt, and slacks.

If Jongin had thought him good-looking before, dressed as he had been in the factory’s uniform; right now, with the fading evening sun lighting him with its soft, warm colors, the only word he has is breathtakingly handsome.

As Jongin approaches, he suddenly looks up. “Hello, Jongin,” he greets, before raising his hand to give him a small awkward wave.

Amused at the greeting, Jongin returns the gesture. “Hey, Joonmyun,” he replied, before dropping his hand. “Sorry to keep you waiting, I had to deal with--uh-- something.” He had been almost out the door when Sehun had called him and asked him out for drinks. Jongin had never been a good liar; Sehun had assumed immediately that Jongin’s attempt at making excuses to avoid him was related to a booty call, and had proceeded to give Jongin advice on safe . Jongin’s answer had been to hang up on him.

“It was only six minutes,” Joonmyun recites, and then adds, his gaze on Jongin, “and twelve seconds.”

“Oh, now you’re counting seconds?” Jongin teases. “I thought that wasn’t your thing before.”

“I adapted,” Joonmyun replies. Jongin laughs.

“Well, I’m glad you called. What are you hungry for?” Jongin asks, glancing around the area. There are several stalls set up along the promenade. “Burgers? Hot dogs? There’s a place here that makes the best skewers, if you’re looking for that.”

“I am not hungry.”

“Oh.” Jongin looks at him quizzically. “Then why did you ask me if I wanted to get a meal?”

“I wanted to see you again,” Joonmyun answers, looking at him directly. “I was--” he hesitates, as if he’s unsure of the word-- “Lonely.”

Jongin’s cheeks begin to grow hot. “Oh, uh… yeah. Okay, that’s… that’s okay. I think.” It sounds almost as if Joonmyun’s hitting on him this time, and Jongin feels strangely out of place. It’s been awhile since he’s done this. “Well, uh, is it okay if I get something for myself anyway?” When Joonmyun nods, Jongin uses the excuse to quickly usher them past the stalls, in search of food.

They finally find themselves seated on one of the benches set up around the park. Jongin dives into his fried chicken, occasionally offering to share a few pieces with Joonmyun who politely declines. They chat a little - or rather, Jongin ends up talking about his job as a Mechanic, and the different types of robots he’s worked on before. Joonmyun tells him that he doesn’t do much except work, and most days he spends his time reading or sleeping.

Eventually the conversation drifts back to Jongin again, who tells Joonmyun that he built his first robot when he was twelve, out of a broken mechanical toy he had found in his family’s attic. It had taken him several days to disassemble the parts and put them back together with parts from his dad’s old radio. It was weeks later when he ended up with a small, functioning (and slightly temperamental) robot with a tendency to wander off the family property at inopportune times, sending Jongin into panic whenever it went missing.

“It stopped working a couple of years ago, but I couldn’t bear to throw it away. I still have it back at my apartment, though.” Jongin finishes the last piece of chicken, and wipes his greasy fingers clean before reaching for his drink, taking a long and satisfying gulp.

“Does it have a name?” Joonmyun asks.

Feeling a little foolish, Jongin attempts to hide behind his plastic cup before answering. “Pinocchio.”

“Pinocchio?” Joonmyun looks at him in curiosity.

“It’s from an old book. My dad used to read it to me when I was a kid.” Jongin feels a little wistful reminiscing over the past. “It’s about a wooden puppet who wanted to be a real boy so badly that he did everything he could to become one.”

“Did he find a way?” Joonmyun is leaning forward, his voice filled with eagerness. “Did he find a way to become real?”

Jongin nods. “He did.”

“How?”

“The Fairy granted his wish and he became a real boy in the end.”

Joonmyun goes silent. For a few long moments, it seems as if he’s deep in thought. Finally, he speaks up again. “Do you think androids could become real?”

Caught by surprise by this question, Jongin bursts out laughing. “Only if there’s magic involved, which doesn’t exist. I doubt an android could turn into a human being any other way.”

“What if an android could become human?” Joonmyun persisted.

“For one thing,” Jongin begins, “they lack the ability to feel hurt and angry and sad, or happy. Androids can simulate emotions based on how we program them, but they can’t tell you if they’re happy or sad inside, only what the programs tells them to say. They can’t tell you if they’re feeling tired or depressed, and worst of all, an android can’t feel or express love. Basically,” Jongin finishes, “you can program a subroutine that to make an android show you love, but they don’t have the free will to express it on their own.”

Joonmyun seems to ponder over his answer, and then asks, “Then, how do humans express love?”

Jongin glances at Joonmyun, taking in his attractive features. “Don’t you know the answer to that?”

“I have never been in love,” Joonmyun informs him. “I am not qualified to respond to that question.”

“Oh,” Jongin replies, his face growing warm. “Well…” -- he thinks back to the first time he had been in love, which was actually more of a childhood crush on his next-door neighbour, and to the last time he had been in a relationship, which had ended almost as soon as it had began. “I’m… I’m not sure if I am either,” he mumbles. He tries to remember the romance novels that he had snuck into his sister's room to read when he had been younger. “I guess it’s when you can’t stop thinking about that person, even when they’re not around. Or when your heart beats really fast whenever you’re near the person. Or when you see them, you feel so happy as if your chest is about to burst.”

“And that… that is what love is?” Joonmyun looks so serious that Jongin can’t help being amused.

“That’s what they say,” he admits, intrigued by Joonmyun’s intensity on the subject. “I just haven’t discovered it yet.” He lets out a chuckle. “Maybe I’m an android, deep down inside.”

Joonmyun gives him a skeptical look. “You would make a poor android.”

“Really?” Jongin asks, still grinning. He leans forward to hear Joonmyun’s reply. “Why do you think I’ll make a poor android?”

“You eat too much unhealthy food,” Joonmyun informs him in a dry tone of voice, pointing at the remains of Jongin’s box of fried chicken. “You would end up clogging up your hydraulic tubes and parts with cheap grease and bad sauce.”

Jongin bursts out laughing. “Androids don’t need food, though.” He gives Joonmyun another amused look. “Wait, was that a joke?” he teases. “Did you just make an actual joke?”

“I do not joke,” Joonmyun replies stiffly - which makes Jongin laugh even harder.

Then, to his surprise, Joonmyun smiles. It’s a small one, with the edge of his lips curving upwards slightly, but it somehow makes Jongin’s heart skip a beat; he’s never seen Joonmyun look anything else but serious before.

It’s been awhile since he’s been at ease like this with someone. He’s not like anyone Jongin has met before; awkward and serious with the tendency to blurt out the most random things, yet there’s a certain charm surrounding him that makes Jongin want to know more about him. And with someone as attractive as Joonmyun, he can’t help but wonder why Joonmyun isn’t already taken.

“You know, you should smile more often,” Jongin blurts out. “It makes you look nice.” Then, realizing that what he’s saying could be misunderstood, he adds, “I mean, not that you didn’t look nice before, I mean--ah-- you’re very good-looking already, just that--just that--” He pauses, realizing that Joonmyun has a surprised look on his face.

“I was smiling?”

“Yeah,” Jongin says, wondering why Joonmyun seems so confused “Kinda like this,” Jongin tries to mimic the smile that Joonmyun had a few minutes.

He doesn’t know if he gets it right, but then Joonmyun’s looking up at him with a strange expression on his face - right before he slowly lifts his hand and hesitantly touches Jongin’s lips.

Jongin holds his breath. Joonmyun seems to be curious, his fingers lightly tracing Jongin’s mouth, the shape of it, going back and forth several times. It’s when he pushes down on Jongin’s bottom lip that Jongin lets out a surprised gasp.

Joonmyun freezes, before pulling his hand back quickly. “Did I hurt you?” he asks, his eyes wide open. “Jongin, I am sorry--”

“It’s okay, it’s fine,” Jongin tries to reassure him. “I just wasn’t expecting that.” There’s a tingling feeling on his lips, left by Joonmyun’s fingers, and for one brief, irrational moment Jongin wants Joonmyun to touch him again, to continue whatever he had been doing.

But he’s stopped by the strange, conflicted look on Joonmyun’s face, as if he’s unsure of what he’s done.

“I should go back,” Joonmyun says suddenly. “To the factory. I have… I have to work tonight.”

Jongin can’t help but feel a little disappointed. He was hoping to spend more time with Joonmyun - up till that moment, he had been enjoying their time together. “Can I see you again?” he asks.

Joonmyun pauses, and lifts his head up to Jongin’s gaze. “You want to see me again?”

“Yeah,” Jongin replies. “We could just… I don’t know. Hang out here again. Grab a few drinks.” Jongin decides to just throw it out there, and takes a deep breath. “Joonmyun, I’m asking you out on a date.”

“A date?” Joonmyun says, before repeating, almost in wonder, “A date.” Then, he smiles, his expression soft and almost shy before he nods. “I would like that.”

Jongin ends up thinking about that smile the entire walk home.



#

It takes two dates before Jongin admits to himself that he likes Joonmyun.

Somehow, they end up meeting at the park each time. Joonmyun seems to enjoy watching and observing the people walking around them, and Jongin loves the freedom that comes from being outside instead of being cooped up indoors working on machines all the time. While their dates haven’t lasted very long - Joonmyun always has to leave early to head to work - they make the best of it, and after each date Jongin can’t help but look forward to the next one.

While he’s still as polite as ever, speaking formally to Jongin, Joonmyun seems to be more relaxed and his speech is becoming less stilted during every date. Up till now, though, they haven’t actually done anything or gone further than just a slight brush of hands when Jongin’s trying to point something interesting out to Joonmyun. He’s been enjoying their conversations, watching as Joonmyun turns flustered when Jongin teases him or when he’s questioning a topic that Jongin brings up, especially when it involves androids. Jongin also begins to discover that Joonmyun isn’t as serious as he makes himself out to be. Hidden behind that serious, earnest face is a cache of dry wit which makes Jongin do everything he can to draw out.

Tonight, he’s waiting for Joonmyun to show up for their third date. He’s been waiting for a little over fifteen minutes, feeling a little antsy. It’s not like Joonmyun to show up late, which makes Jongin wonder if he’s alright. There are no messages in his voicemail, and no texts in his inbox - and when Jongin tries to call Joonmyun, he’s informed that the line is out of range.

He’s close to working himself up into going to the factory to check if Joonmyun is safe when he shows up suddenly, over an hour late. He looks worried and stressed out, and he’s wearing a plain shirt and slacks, with his jacket wrapped around his arm.

Joonmyun apologizes profusely the moment he’s within Jongin’s earshot. “I am so sorry to have made you wait, there was a problem at the factory and I had to sort that out first.”

“Oh, if that’s the case we could have met up another day--”

“No,” Joonmyun replies, surprising Jongin with his abruptness. After a few seconds, he adds, “It is alright now. And I wanted to see you again, so I came.”

Trying not to blush, Jongin quickly clears his throat. “Uh, me too.” It’s strange how much he meant it. Earlier, he had been worried and anxious, but all of that had melted away at the sight of Joonmyun.

“Anyway,” he speaks up again, trying to avoid the awkward moment, “I thought we should try another place tonight. It’s a few streets down this way, and they serve the best drinks--” He continues talking Joonmyun as they walk towards the direction of the pub that Jongin had picked.

Halfway toward the place, they’re walking side by side in a small, quiet street when Jongin notices Joonmyun’s jacket is beginning to slip from his arm, the sleeves dragging on the ground slightly. He stops walking and leans over to adjust the jacket in Joonmyun’s grip. “Hey, careful now, you don’t want to ruin this--” he begins to say, and then stops.

His fingers are still clutching the edges of Joonmyun’s jacket, where he had been about to tug it out of Joonmyun’s grasp. “Your arm.” Jongin finds that he’s unable to tear his gaze away from his arm. “Joonmyun, your arm-- it’s--”

It’s damaged, the skin torn off to reveal, instead of flesh and bone beneath it, a series of wires and parts that look exactly like all the robots that Jongin has ever worked on.

“You have a cybernetic arm?” he says. “Is that why you were late? Did you injure yourself at the factory?” When Joonmyun doesn’t answer straight away, Jongin looks up at him. “Joonmyun?”

“I cannot be injured, Jongin,” Joonmyun replies, looking resigned. “This is not a cybernetic implant. I-- I am not human.”

Jongin stares at him, trying to process what he’s saying - and then everything clicks into place. Joonmyun’s a synthetic.

But it makes no sense. Synthetics were, by theory, designed to look exactly like humans, but they were still androids. Androids that not only needed to be programmed to act, think and speak within a limited set of commands - but should not have demonstrated such intelligence and human consciousness the way Joonmyun had shown. The way he had acted, the way he had spoken to Jongin and responded to him indicated that he was more than just an ordinary android - as if he were real.

“But… why didn’t you say anything before?” Jongin demands. “Why did you pretend to be human? Why did you lie to me?”

“I did not lie to you,” Joonmyun interrupts him. “If you had asked me if I was an android, I would have had to say yes - but you assumed that I was human.” He sounds so logical, so sincere and earnest in his belief that he had done nothing wrong that it pisses Jongin off even more.

“And what about everything you said before? About spending time with me?” Jongin’s chest hurts as he remembers the way Joonmyun had looked at him that night. “Or was that part of you being human?”

Joonmyun’s eyes widen, and his expression shifts slightly, as if Jongin’s comments had hurt him. It’s remarkable how… natural the movement is, the way he was designed to mimic even the most subtle human responses. It’s no wonder Jongin had been so easily fooled.

He refuses to be fooled any longer.

“Jongin, wait--” is the last thing he hears before he releases his hold on Joonmyun’s jacket and leaves.



#

That night, instead of sleeping, Jongin finds himself staring at the ceiling in his bedroom, thinking about synthetics.

Still relatively new to the robotics industry, synthetics were designed to act, look and even sound human. While it was more common for androids to mass-produced with faceless features - synthetics were each given a human face, which allowed them to emulate facial expressions.

(The only time Jongin’s seen a synthetic is on TV for some documentary - and in Sehun’s collection, which he would like to never accidentally find again.)

However, no matter how much time and effort and research went into perfecting synthetics, humans could never create the perfect android. The closest had been the X-30 models, hailed as the most realistic looking androids to have been created - until a glitch in the programming forced the company to shut down the project. Eventually the androids had been disassembled, with no mention of what the glitch was.

The rumors, however, indicated that the X-30’s had begun to showcase something which was missing from the robotics world before - free will. Artificial intelligence, far more advanced than any other A.I. that had been designed. They could learn and adapt based on their surroundings - and that had led to them revolting against their creators before being caught and shut down.

Jongin had been curious enough to search for the images of the X-30 models, and had found one, named ‘Suho’, that resembled Joonmyun. Suho had been the first prototype, but he had been shut off two years ago when the program had been cancelled.

He had stared at the picture for a long time before shutting down his laptop and crawled into bed, his chest aching, his mind filled with more questions than before. How had Suho end up here, far away from the very place where he had been first assembled? How did he manage to get hired as a human? And why did he seek Jongin out? Why did he make Jongin feel so happy one moment and frustrated the next?

In the end, caught up in a loop that makes him feel like he’s spinning around in circles with no answer in sight, Jongin gives up. It’s a long time before he finally falls asleep, and when he does, his dreams are filled with nothing but Joonmyun.



#

There’s an insistent buzzing sound surrounding Jongin, once that keeps getting louder and louder until he wakes up, startled.

For a moment, he stares around him in confusion until he realizes that the sound is coming from his apartment. He stumbles out of his room and blearily makes his way to the intercom panel. “Whoever this is,” he grunts out into the mic part, “you’d better have a good reason for--”

“Jongin,” Joonmyun sounds anguished, “Jongin, please, I need you to help me.”

“Joonmyun?” Jongin’s eyes are wide open now. He glances at the clock nearby and realizes that it’s nearly three in the morning. “What are you doing here? How did you even get here?”

“Please, Jongin--”

“,” Jongin swears. He feels a flash a guilt; he had left Joonmyun behind yesterday without checking to see if he had any internal damage. What if this is all Jongin’s fault? “Okay, look just stay there, I’ll help you up.” Still swearing, he throws on a sweatshirt and a pair of shorts and hurries out of the apartment.

Half an hour later, he’s leaning over his laptop, squinting at the results from the diagnostics scan that he’s done on Joonmyun. “There’s nothing wrong with your program, or your internal system,” Jongin tells him. “Everything is in working order.”

“If everything is working, as you say, then why does my chest feel this way?” Joonmyun asks in a small voice. He’s seated on Jongin’s couch, dressed in the same uniform that Jongin’s used to seeing him in at the factory, looking the worse for wear.

“Your chest-- wait, what do you mean, feel?”

“Yesterday,” Joonmyun begins, “when you left the factory, I wanted to go after you. I wanted to tell you that I did not mean for you to feel as though I had lied to you.” He shakes his head. “But I could not move. I have never felt this kind of pain before, Jongin. I am not supposed to feel - and yet what I felt yesterday was real.” Jongin remembers what he had read last night. The rumors surrounding the X-30 models. On how they had achieve consciousness. If he needed proof that the rumors were real, it was here, in front of him, sitting on his living room couch and hooked up to his laptop.

“Hurt,” Jongin tells him, feeling as though he needed to explain further for Joonmyun’s sake. “You felt hurt, because… because I left.” He closes his eyes, remembering how he had reacted. “But why did you feel hurt?”

“Because I thought you hated me for being a machine--”

“Stop,” Jongin says, opening his eyes again to look straight at Joonmyun. “Stop saying that. I don’t hate you for being an android - I’m a Mechanic, for goodness sake. I have cybernetic implants. If I hated machines, I wouldn’t be here today.” He takes a deep breath. “But I didn’t like the fact that you manipulated me and made me feel inferior, as if I was nothing more than a test subject.” Jongin doesn’t miss the irony in that statement, since that Joonmyun was, once, a test subject.

“I only wanted to understand what it was like to be like one of you.” Joonmyun looks so distraught that Jongin almost believes him. “I read everything I could find, watched every video I could to try and find out more, even tried talking to the few humans who were at the factory before they left, but I was never close to an answer. Until I met you.”

Jongin sits down on the couch, blinking. “Me? But why?”

“You spoke to me. You treated me as if I was another person. As if I was like you. None of the other humans have treated me more than anything but a machine.” Joonmyun looks down at his hands, and Jongin notices that the his arm is now fixed, the skin no longer exposed. In fact, it looks as if he had never been damaged. “When we met the first time, I added a new subroutine so I could interact with you more naturally. Each time we met, I would replay our interactions, our conversations and adapt to them.

“But then you said that being human was more than trying to act human. That androids can never understand what it is like to feel an emotion, because we are merely machines. It made me want to feel, to understand what those emotions were, and why they mattered so much to humans. So I altered my subroutine completely.” He lifts his head and looks directly at Jongin. “But I may have made an error.”

Jongin’s eyes grow wide. “What do you mean? What did you do?”

“We were designed for adaptability. Somehow, by changing the subroutine, it meant that I was adapting to being human. To seek out emotions. Yet seeing you every time made me feel as if everything was brighter, and whenever we were apart, I would feel as if there was a heavy cloud over me. I could not focus on my work, and that was why I made a mistake at the factory the other day. I had no time to repair the damages, eager as I was to see you.” His expression seems distraught. “That is why I need your help. To fix my subroutine. I can’t-- I cannot… function like this.”

They sit there in silence, as Jongin tries to process what Joonmyun is saying. Finally, he speaks up. “When I left you behind the other night, what was the first thing you did?”

“I--” Joonmyun hesitates. “I could not move.”

“Why is that?”

“Because I was damaged.”

“But you damaged your arm,” Jongin points out. “Not your legs. Why couldn’t you move?”

“Because--” then Joonmyun’s eyes widen. “Because I -- I felt. Hurt.” He looks up at Jongin, the surprised expression on his face. “I was hurt.”

“And why were you hurt, Joonmyun?” Jongin asks. “Why did you feel hurt?”

“Because you spoke to me harshly.”

Jongin feels a flash of guilt for that, but he presses on. “How about now? How do you feel when you’re in front of me?”

Joonmyun blinks at him, as if trying to understand his question. And then, a look of wonder appears on his face. “Happy.”

“Happy,” Jongin repeats, and he can’t help feeling that as strange as it all sounds, it’s as if Joonmyun has really achieved emotion - something that should have been impossible for an android.

But Joonmyun’s not an android, or even just a synthetic - he’s much more than that. And it might have taken Jongin a while to realize it, but the affections he has for Joonmyun are just as real as he would have for any human. It’s not fair for Jongin to dismiss them, not when he understands exactly how Joonmyun feels.

There are a lot of questions that still need to be answered: like how Joonmyun had ended up here, how he had altered his own subroutines and whether Jongin should be worried that the City would discover a sentient A.I. within their midst - but right now, Jongin puts it all aside, intending to just stay in this moment with Joonmyun.

“I’m… I’m going to try something,” he tells Joonmyun. “But you’re going to have to promise me you won’t panic.” He pauses. “Or punch me.”

“Why would I do that?” Joonmyun asks, confused.

“Because I’m going to kiss you,” Jongin tells him.

“Oh.” A small begins to form on Joonmyun’s face. “I would like that.”

“Okay,” Jongin says, before he reaches out to cup his chin, pulling him in closer to press their lips together.

When he finally pulls away, Jongin finds that he’s feeling a little dazed, the soft tingling sensation left behind on his lips, much like the time when Joonmyun had first touched them.

“Well?” he asks Joonmyun, who’s looking at him with a dreamy expression.

“I think,” Joonmyun says, “you’ll need to run another test again.”

With a laugh, Jongin tugs Joonmyun closer, and does just that.



# # #

Jongin is rudely awaken from by Sehun’s call.

Morning, sunshine,” Sehun sing-songs in his ear, as Jongin struggles to untangle himself from his blanket and failing miserably. “Or should I say good afternoon, since you managed to sleep through lunch?”

“,” Jongin swears, because he was supposed to meet Sehun at their usual place. He checks the time to discover that it’s already a quarter past two. “Uh, I kind of overslept.”

Wouldn’t be the first time,” Sehun retorts, which makes Jongin feel guiltier. “You’re paying for my meals for the next two weeks for standing me up.”

Jongin slumps back against his pillow. “Fine, whatever,” he mutters.

Sounding pleased, Sehun continues, “Anyway, I picked up a new video--

Sehun--”

Give me a chance to explain! It’s got synthetics this time, Jongin, and there’s even one with a humongous di--

Jongin holds the phone away from his ear, wincing - and that’s when he notices that the spot on the bed next to him is empty.

He sits upright quickly, feeling a slight surge of panic. For a brief moment, he thinks that Joonmyun has left, that whatever had happened yesterday had been a mistake, or that Joonmyun hadn’t even been here and everything had been just a dream - but then he realizes that he’s not alone in the room.

Joonmyun is seated by the window, clad in a thin shirt that looks just like Jongin’s, his legs pulled up and knees tucked against his chest as he looks out onto the street below. Sunlight spills into the room through the blinds, showing the serene, contented look on Joonmyun’s face.

Sehun’s still speaking on the phone. Jongin manages to catch the tail end of the sentence. “--my duty as your best friend to care about your wellbeing and definite lack of life--

“You know what, Sehun?” Jongin interrupts, keeping his gaze on Joonmyun - who chooses that moment to look away from the window. His eyes meet Jongin’s, and a soft, gentle smile appears on his face that makes Jongin realize that he wants to wake up to this forever. “I already have someone better.”







end.

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Abbll16 #1
Chapter 1: This was absolutely amazing!
Starinlight
#2
Chapter 1: Waahh, I enjoyed this thoughtfully, it was so good~ >.<
It's such an amazing fic, and it doesn't seem like a 7k fanfic; I read it so quickly that I was actually surprised when it ended! Sukai is one of my favorites pairings, and the idea of Junmyeon as an android and Jongin as a mechanic... *sighs remembering Jongin in one of the Monster's outfit*
Perfect author-nim~!
zuzuzu
#3
hey hey hey i'm so elated to see this in aff! i've read this on LJ and i just wanna say this has become my most favorite sukai fic ever! i think i've read this like 10 times and be like, "how can a 7K fic feel so short?" i just love everything that you've written i think i've memorized every scene, i had to stop myself from rereading and rereading. these are the kind of stories that really hit my taste and thank you for this. you've made narrating so easy and the words flowed so smoothly as well as the dialogues and the characters thoughts. i felt really giddy with junmyeon's lines; they were just so innocent and honest that he wasn't aware how sweet the impact actually was to jongin. everything was just so perfect i will forever treasure this story. you ended this really really well but i still wish for more. ㅠㅠㅠㅠ but all in all, thank you. this is perfect.
kljltcws #4
Chapter 1: This is too perfect! I'm sad it ended.
chayok
#5
Chapter 1: OMG!!!! This story is sooooo good..
Aww..this make me want to like SuKai moree