Jungkook’s POV

“The number you are calling is currently busy, please try again later or you can leave a message after the beep sound.” I groaned loudly as I tossed my phone on the bed. I didn’t know how many times that I called Hyojin but the line was always busy. She didn’t even reply my texts and my emails. Instead of thinking about ‘she must be cheating behind you’ ‘she must grow tired of the long distance relationship’ and ‘she already forgets you’ assumptions, I thought about ‘what if something bad just happened to her?’. I couldn’t even think straight for these past few weeks, I could feel something wasn’t right though. Last week I also had a nightmare of Hyojin was being buried below something that I wasn’t sure what it was, but I think it was water or something? The dream made me to grow more worried of her.

I still had five more months to spend here in London before I got back to Seoul but I think I couldn’t wait any longer. Visiting Hyojin for a while doesn’t hurt right? And after two or three days in Seoul, I would come back here again to finish the job. I just nodded at the brilliant idea. Jungkook you’re a bad guy. How come you have that brilliant idea just now? I stood up from my bed right away and left my bedroom to find my secretary, Jaebum. I walked toward his room and I was ready to knock his door but I stopped it immediately when I heard his voice.

“Yeah dude you don’t have to worry, Jungkook is still here. He still trying to contact his girlfriend everyday though but like you asked me before, I still cut off his phone server from here. You also did that from Hyojin’s phone server right? So they still can’t contact each other?” What? So that’s why I couldn’t reach Hyojin through the phone all this time? Because this cut off my phone server? I kept listening to the conversation from the outside of his room and I gasped when I heard another word which came from my own secretary whom I trust a lot. “Yeah yeah yeah I know it Jongin. You are such a smartass, but I’m smarter than you, my dear cousin. Okay I’ll end the call, I’ll tell you if something new is up.”

I couldn’t hold my anger anymore when I felt myself opening the door harshly. I saw Jaebum widened his eyes in shock and I didn’t spend so much time to punch his face. I grabbed his collar and I punched him one more time. “So are you behind this? And are you that bastard’s cousin? I can’t believe I trust you all these times.” I hissed at him. “You’re fired. I don’t want to see your face ever again. You’re lucky I still have mercy to not killing you right now.” I let another punch on his face then I kicked his waist before I left him on the floor.

I back into my own room as I calmed myself down. “What should I do now?” I shut my eyes tightly and an idea was popping in my head. I took my phone quickly to find Hyojin’s office number. “Why didn’t you do it earlier Jeon Jungkook you’re so stupid!” I said to myself as I was praying her office number was not being blocked by that Jongin guy. I pressed the number on the hotel’s telephone and I tried to dial it. Please please let it---

“Hello good morning. It’s BigHit Magazine Publisher Office. Can I help you?” The woman said through the phone. Thank god. I shut my eyes as I sighed in relieve.

“Uhm hello…I need to talk with Hyojin, could you please connect it to her?”

“You mean Choi Hyojin, Sir?” She asked once again and I just said ‘yes’ as a response. “I’m sorry Sir, she isn’t in the office at this moment. May I ask who am I talking to right now?”

“I’m Jungkook, Jeon Jungkook. Could you tell me why is she not in the office?” I started to feel nervous. I didn’t know why I felt like something bad would happen later.

“Oh right, Sir. Are you her boyfriend right? Don’t you know she is being hospitalized? It’s been a week.”

I ran as fast as I could when I reached The Seoul Hospital. I flew right away to Seoul after I heard Hyojin was being hospitalized for a week. I didn’t care if my work in London would be neglected because Hyojin was my number one priority. I finally reached her room but there were two guards in front of the door. I tried to walk toward the door but they blocked me right away.

“Yah I don’t have time to deal with you all, I need to see Hyojin right now. Step aside please.” I said coldly at them.

“I’m sorry, Sir. No one can’t enter the room besides her families or her close friends.” One of the guards told me.

“I’m her boyfriend damn it! Let me see her!” I shouted at them then I pushed them to enter the room but they blocked me once again. They dragged me further from the door but they stopped immediately when someone told them to stop. I turned my head toward the voice and I saw a woman who just exited Hyojin’s room.

“Are you Jungkook right?” The woman asked me with a weak smile. “Guys you can let him off. He’s Hyojin’s boyfriend.”

The guards released their hands off me then they bowed at me. “We’re sorry, Sir.” They said and I just nodded at them.

“Jungkook-ssi, do you want to meet her?” The woman asked me.

“Yes please. I really need to meet her.” I said at her in a desperate tone.

“Okay, come in. I hope she will get better when she meets you. I’m Nara by the way, Hyojin’s friend.” She opened the door room and she gestured me to enter it. I walked inside the room with my heart beating so fast. I’m going to meet Hyojin after one year and a half. I smiled from ear to ear as I walked closer to the bedroom. Then I saw her, sitting on the bed while hugging her knees. She was staring blankly at the wall like she was thinking deeply about something. I could see that she became much thinner than before though. Did she eat well? I walked closer to her then I realized that her face was really pale and she also looked so weak, not as bright like usual. Her gaze was also so gloomy and lonely. The urge to bring her on my arms was too strong. I really miss her. Why did she turn out being like this? She still didn’t move from her spot because she seemed didn’t know there’s a person who observed her.

I turned my head at Nara who was standing near the door. She just smiled at me and she gestured me to greet Hyojin. I turned my attention back to the girl whom I love the most and I finally let a word to come out from my lips in a kind of a whisper. “Hyojin?”

As she heard something loud, she startled on her seat when she heard my voice. She turned her head at me and she widened her eyes in horror. Her body began to tremble and she scooted her body to go further from me. She looked so scared and I didn’t know what’s the reason she was being like this. “Hyojin? Are you okay?” I said softly as I took a single step to get closer to her but she just took a step away from me.

“Don’t come closer.” She said with a raspy voice. I felt a knife was piercing right through my heart when she said those words.

I walked toward her as I said. “Why Hyojin? I miss you, I’m sorry if---“

“I SAID DON’T COME CLOSER!” She shouted at me and my eyes widened when I saw she threw a glass toward me. It crushed into pieces when it hit the wall behind me and I was lucky that it didn’t hit me.

“Hyojin wait—“

“JUST GO!” She threw another thing at me and I dodged it once again. She began to throw the things which were near her and I saw Nara ran toward her. Nara immediately hugged Hyojin to calm her. I saw she was sobbing loudly in Nara’s arms. Then Nara signaled me to leave the room.

“Jungkook, I’m sorry but you should wait outside.” Nara mouthed at me and I just nodded my head. I took a last glance at Hyojin who was crying and shaking in Nara’s arms with a hurt feeling. “Ssssttt Hyojin, it’s okay. Everything is alright. There’s no one who will hurt you.” Nara whispered at her. I felt like my heart was breaking into pieces at the sight.

I left the room and I sat on one of the chairs. I leaned my head against the wall behind me then I let a huge sigh. “Jungkook this is all your fault.” I closed my face with my both hands. “If you didn’t leave her here, all of these would never happen.” I felt so useless right now, anger and sadness were also flowing in my blood. I couldn’t stop blaming myself that Hyojin was becoming like that.  I could still remember the way she stared at me in horror like she didn’t want to see me at all.

Finally the door of Hyojin’s room was opened and revealing Nara with an unreadable face. I wasn’t blaming her if she would be angry at me later but she just giving me a warm smile as she sat beside me. “How should I start to tell you about her condition……” She stared blankly at the space. I just kept silent on my seat, giving her a cue to continue the explanation. She took a deep breath and she turned her head toward me. “I don’t want to make the things worse but don’t you really know about her current condition at all? Where were you all these times Jungkook? You’re her boyfriend for Godness sake!”

I lowered my stare on the floor, avoiding her glare. “I’m sorry, something was up in London. If I told you the problem, I don’t think you’ll believe me but I swear to the God Hyojin is always in my mind every single day. So please, could you please tell me what’s going on with her? I need some explanations.” I was desperately begging at her with my pleas.

She sighed loudly and she turned her head back to look at the front. “We found her a week ago in the side of the river.”

I gasped at her words. “Did she try to…..I mean she was drowning in the water or……?” I cut her off. I was starting to remember my nightmare of her was being buried below something. I was afraid that she tried to do a suicide thingy but I shook my thoughts right away.

“We didn’t know anything about that Jungkook, I’m so glad we found her alive and her body is healthy without missing a single thing. She doesn’t hurt anywhere on her body, but….”

I was glad to hear she wasn’t hurt anywhere but when Nara said ‘but’ I began to feel guilty once again. If she’s being hurt elsewhere, I’m not going to forgive myself.

“Her physical isn’t in a good condition. The first doctor was a man and when the first time Hyojin saw him, she began to tremble, crying loudly, and threw the things at him. Just the same like the incident which was happened to you a while ago, Jungkook.” She stopped for a while and she continued. “It’s also the same when the male friends from our office were visiting her, she was also behaving like that. Then the doctor gave me an assumption, she was suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder or PTSD syndrome.” Nara turned her head toward me and her face was already wet in tears. “And the doctor also said, looking by the way Hyojin acts toward men……it’s probably because she had a trauma with a man before. We still don’t know the reason of her trauma yet, because Hyojin didn’t open up with anyone, even me, until now. I thought she would act differently toward you but I guess I was wrong.” She wiped away her tears with her hand.

I massaged my temple, I couldn’t think straight right now. But I was a bit relieved that she didn’t only do the throwing things part at me, but with the other men though. I thought she hates me, but I deserve it though if she turned out hating me. I turned my body toward Nara when I heard her voice.

“Jungkook, please bring her back to her usual self. I know it shocked you but I believe you can do it. I know you’re the only one who can make her open up of her trauma.” She begged at me.

I smiled at her and I said with no doubt at all. “I will. I will do anything for her, even though it will cost my life.”

This is the fourth times that I’ve been visiting Hyojin at the hospital. The first time was when I flew right away from London, the second time was like four days ago, and the third time was yesterday. The first time was kinda not good because she was screaming loudly and threw the things at me. She looked so fragile and vulnerable when I saw her for the first time after being apart for over a year. I just wanted to hug her and telling her that everything would be alright but sad to said that she didn't even want me to be in the same room with her. The second time I visited her was the same like the first time, she was still screaming at me, shouting at me that I should leave her alone and the throwing things part was still being replayed. The third time which was yesterday was a little bit better. She didn’t throw me the things and she began stopped screaming at me. But the bad thing was she just kept silent on her spot, as if she didn’t care about my existence at all. At least she didn’t push me away so I could spend more time with her even though we didn’t talk with each other. I felt sad and I kept blaming myself about her current situation right now. I still didn’t know what the thing that turned her into like this though.

I walked toward Hyojin’s room, bringing a bucket of fresh flowers. I hope she would like it and she would talk to me soon like it was before but I wasn’t expecting too much either. Seeing her in a happy and healthy state would be enough for me. I gave a small smile and a nod when the guards in front of Hyojin’s room greeted me. One of the guards told me that the therapist just left the room after finishing the routine examine. I thanked them then I entered the room to see Hyojin was sleeping peacefully on the bed. I placed the flower bucket on the table then I pulled a chair beside the bed and I sat on it in silent, afraid if I woke her up.

“Hyojin, I hope you will open up to me or to Nara soon….so we can find a way to bring you back. I can’t stand seeing you suffering like this.” I whispered those words as I examined Hyojin’s face quietly. “Get well soon, baby. I really miss your old self, I’m really sorry I couldn’t protect you all these times when I was still in London.” I talked to her sleeping figure once again but she was still sleeping peacefully. I brought my hand to touch her face but when it almost touched the side of her face, I stopped it right away. I shut my eyes then I sighed in silent. I smiled sadly as I retreated my hand back. Don’t disturb her sleep, Jungkook.

I didn’t realize that a half hour has passed. I was too absorbed observing her until I grew alarm on my seat. I saw Hyojin was suddenly shaking her head abruptly in her sleep. “No please don’t…... Let me go please…” She mumbled those words as she was still shaking her head. Then she suddenly cried in her sleep.

“Hyojin?” I called her name softly but she still closed her eyes. “Hyojin, you’re having a nightmare. Please wake up.” I moved my body closer to her then I put my both hands on her shoulders to wake her up.

Hyojin soon finally woke up. She opened her eyes as she gasped loudly for the air and when her eyes met mine, her eyes widened in shock. She avoided my eyes then she diverted her gaze to look at her left side and she hissed at me in a low tone. “Hands off please.”

I released my hands immediately and I was back to sat on the chair. “I’m sorry Hyojin, you seem like having a nightmare so I need to wake you up.” I said to her softly but she was still back facing me. She then sat up to sit on the bed, she hugged her knees, and she put her chin on them. “Have you eaten your lunch Hyojin?” I asked her softly, trying to make a conversation. Silent. Hyojin was ignoring my question. She looked at the wall in front of her with blank eyes. I didn’t want to give up so I let another word. “Hyojin, I brought you a bucket of fresh flower. I hope you’ll like it.” This time I said those words with a little bit joyful tone in my voice. But same, she’s still ignoring me. She didn’t even take a glance at my way. She’s still like yesterday Jungkook. It’s okay, you can come back here tomorrow and maybe sh----

“I feel dirty. Really really dirty, Jungkook.” She said, trembled. I blinked my eyes repeatedly in disbelief. Did I hear it right? She called me by my name? Did she just say ‘Jungkook’? But dirty? What does she mean about that? She suddenly rubbed both of her shoulders with her hand, the place that been touched by my hands before, as she was afraid it would give her an illness. I was taken aback by her sudden action and felt offended at the same time. She really doesn’t want to be touched, isn’t she? I gloomily asked myself. But at least, she already talks to me. She even called my name. It’s a progress. I smiled slightly as I brought myself up to not giving up.

I wanted to ask something about that ‘dirty’ word but I held myself, I didn’t want to make her uncomfortable. She already talked to me so it means I could make a step closer to bring her back to her usual self. She suddenly stood up from the bed and she walked toward the bathroom slowly. She couldn’t stop mumbling the words “I feel dirty. I need to take a bath.” repeatedly. I couldn’t stop asking myself what in the word that she kept saying she felt dirty?

My eyes never left her figure until she reached the bathroom. She stopped on her track, right in front of the bathroom door and she turned her body to face me. “Just leave Jungkook. Don’t come here again in the future. I bet you don’t want to have a dirty girlfriend like me. You deserve someone else who’s way better than me though.” I froze on my seat as I heard her words. I was processing so hard to catch what did she just say to me but I still didn’t understand.

“Hyojin wait but what do you mean about you feel dirty. I don’t get it Hyojin. Ple—“

“Get lost. I don’t need your pity. Please, I’m begging you.” She begged at me with her teary eyes. “I don’t want to see you again.” She blinked her eyes then I saw a tear was rolling down her beautiful face. I felt hurt. I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I felt like my chest was being tight and I was suffocating by the thin air. She doesn’t want to see me….. She wiped away the tears, she looked at me once again with those teary pretty eyes, then she left to enter the bathroom.

I feel bad for Jungkook and Hyojin, I feel bad for both of them that I just have to ruin their relationship.....I'm sorry guys please forgive me hahaha but please hoping that they can pass all of those hardships ;)

btw your all reactions about the first chapter were so epic, they just made my day:) thank you for the subscribbers and the comments it really means a lot to me hehe I hope you guys enjoying this new chapter and feel free to leave your thoughts about it :)