You get drunk one night, come to me and fuss that you’re gonna sleep with me
You touch my happy trail and say that you wanna lay down in my arms

“Who touched you like this? What was her name? Who did you sing this for, oppa?” Jihyo whispered to the wind, her eyes aimed at Gary as his voice blasted in her ears. They were taking their break. Jihyo was famished yet she could not come to line in their makeshift canteen because Gary was standing at the end of it. She had been waiting for someone to stand behind him to become somewhat a barrier between them but she had already been waiting for 10 minutes. “Isn’t anyone else hungry?!”

“Noona!” Kwangsoo called as he approached her. “Aren’t you hungry?”

“I could devour a human being,” her eyes flared angrily to the unsuspecting Gary again.

“Then what are you doing there mumbling looking like the world has betrayed you? Does the song make you angry?”

“You dare!” Jihyo swatted Kwangsoo’s reaching hand that targeted her earphones.

“Why is everyone angry with me?” his outburst gained a curious glance from the filming crew. Jihyo punched him in the arm but before he crumpled to the ground she dragged him to the line.

She was only an arm length to Gary and yet he didn’t seem to notice. Her hand was shaking as she picked up a tray. All she wanted to do was to beat him with it.

“The line is bit lazy today, neh hyung?”

“Huh?” It took Gary a moment to produce a response finding Jihyo standing next to him. “It’s a lazy day even our Jihyo here was late.”

Jihyo turned to him with a strange expression plastered on her face. Her lack of response silenced him and he retreated to picking out his food. No exchange ensued after that. Jihyo was glad of Kwangsoo’s blabbering as least it wouldn’t look too obvious that they were ignoring each other.

Gary filled his tray and made his way to one of the empty tables to the right. Jihyo had her tray filled too but walked to the vacant seats on the staffs’ table on the other side. Kwangsoo looked left and right, bewildered as if he had been asked to choose. Eventually, he went to Jihyo. Faithful to his noona as always.

“What is going on between you two?” Kwangsoo inquired as soon as he settled opposite to Jihyo.

“What you do mean?” She busying herself with her banchan.

“Gary hyung scolded me earlier too. I never heard him cursed before but today I couldn’t keep up with his cursing.”

“Is that so?” They both turned to Gary.

“Look at him, he’s chomping his food as if it did him so much wrong.”

“How am I supposed to know Kwangsoo-yah.”

“Oh!” he pointed an accusing finger at her, “That was exactly what he said to me. Tell me noona, did two sleep together and it wasn’t good?” he wiggled his eyebrows comically.

Jihyo almost chucked her chopsticks on Kwangsoo’s eye, “YAH! Do you think it’s appropriate to ask that?! And no, we didn’t sleep together, you ert.”

“I’m worried, noona. For the team,” Kwangsoo’s eyes squinted in suspicion, “ARE WE BREAKING UP?” he intentionally raised his voice for Gary to hear and indeed, he turned to their direction, his eyebrow dinting for a millisecond.

“Did you see that? Did you see that?” His animated mouth moved excitedly. “He’s jealous! Gary hyung blinks and knits his eyebrows together when he’s jealous.”

Jihyo sighed, closing her eyes for a few second to calm her irritation. She picked up her tray and stood up.

“Noona, where are you going?

“To eat with Jaesuk oppa. Go to your Gary hyung if you are too curious about us. Tell him my middle finger sends its regards.”

On the contrary to what Jihyo expected, the afternoon rolled on smoothly. Kwangsoo kept a suspecting eye on them but didn’t try to do anything and the filming wrapped up its usual course. Jihyo was on her way to her car, ready to tear her way to the comfort of her home where Kang Gary was only memory when a PD intercepted her.

“Jihyo-ssi, the head producer would like have a word with you.” Said the young female sub-PD.

“What about?” Jihyo was a bit irritated with the impromptu meeting but she was too nice to argue.

“Sorry,” she bowed her head bashfully. “He did ask you to drop by SBS building.”

After getting all the details of the meeting Jihyo drove to SBS. They were made aware of the dropping ratings but that’s the PDs issue not theirs. Her stomach churned at the possibility of cancelling the program, after all they put through with it, after all they have invested on it. After her rejecting Gary to protect it. She parked her car and stared at the building that stood up like a dare.

“C’mon and break me,” she dared back.

 But her demeanour changed as she went inside the conference area. Her heart stopped finding Gary waiting in the otherwise empty room.

“Jihyo?” she could tell he was equally surprised as she. She regarded him for a moment before nodding curtly and sat two chairs away him. Almost instantly the door swished open and the Runningman producer walked in.

“Sorry for the late notification.” He settled in front of them and waited until they sat back on their chairs after their welcoming bows before continuing, “I’ll be straightforward. Runningman is not cancelling, however, have you seen the latest comments on our community page? People are getting bored.”

“Gamdog-nim,” Gary started. “I think this a concern for the rest of the team. Why is it just me and Jihyo here?”

The PD studied them for a moment before adding hesitantly, “Because most of the comments are about the lack of chemistry between you two. The audience noticed you two aren’t as talking much.”

“Gamdog-nim, are you trying to revive a coupling that you pretty much killed after the brain scans?” Jihyo’s tone was a rising challenge.

The producer sighed, “That episode backfired on us. We are truly sorry if that made it harder for you two. Is that why you seemed to be ignoring each other?”

“I just had a break up.” Gary suddenly declared. Jihyo eyes twitched and her vision seemed to blur. She felt her anger rising yet she managed to keep her body from turning to Gary.

“I’m sorry Gary-ssi.” At least the director’s consolation was genuine. “I know that keeping the coupling afloat after so many years and of course, you have your personal lives, things can get a bit complicated.”

“You don’t know what complicated is.” Jihyo openly glared at the director.

“I don’t know how to keep the people excited but Jihyo and I will do the best that we can, won’t we Jihyo-ssi?” Gary steered the conversation away. He knew from the way Jihyo was glaring she was so close to challenging the PD.

Jihyo took her moment to calm herself and choose her words wisely, “Six years, gamdog-nim.  People would think we know everything about each other, wrong. I only know oppa as much as anyone who watches the show.” She blatantly lie at that. Everyone knew that no one in the show knew each other better than them two. “If you want to make this work, stop messing with the truth. May I make a suggestion?” Jihyo smiled darkly.

“Of- of course Jihyo-ssi.” the director was starting to break a sweat.

“Do a couple race in the next episodes. I’ll lie on top of oppa if that’s what the people wants to see.” There was no threat but her voice was enough.

They were alone in an elevator that seemed too narrow he could feel her pulsating next to him. He didn’t think he would be alone with her until all the scars were healed but there they were, catapulted into the reality that they could not escape each other.

“A break up, oppa?” the words slipped from her lips unceremoniously and the lack of emotion in her voice knocked the wind out of him.

“It’s not like that, Jihyo-ah.” His hand instinctively reached to hold her but stopped himself midway.

“Instead of telling me again and again that it not what it seems, why won’t you try tell me what it is for once?”

“Let’s not make this more difficult than it already is.”

“It doesn’t seem difficult for you to walk down the streets with your hand all over that girl as if you’re the only people left in the world.”

“You don’t love me,” He said finally said and that took all the energy left in him. Jihyo loving him, that’s all he ever wanted but he was already too tired to fight for a love that bore no assurance. He had waited too long for her love and now, that love m