Hello guys..
 
I know I supposed to upload a new chapter 2 weeks ago.. But I pretty much sick right now..
You know, I’ve been feeling kind of under weather since last month.. At first, it’s just me being emotional and offended all times.. I was restless when the night comes and my appetite changed drastically.. I also get tired easily and felt like I wanna lay down pretty much everywhere.. I also got discouraged and fed up with everything.. I always wanna lashed out on everyone; on everything.. I got insomnia and I just can sleep when the clock strikes 5 am.. And when I talked to someone, I often can’t recalled the word I want to say.. If I did remember, it was in another language and I can’t find any other word that describe the word I want to say.. Example; I was talking with my mother in Malay and suddenly I can’t recalled what ‘instinct’ was in Malay and I was so frustrated (the funny thing is, I can recalled what’s it in korean XD)
 
I thought I was just stressed about my workloads (it was A LOT, I tell you).. But then, one of my friends sensed something wrong with me when I hang out with them.. He said that I spoke less (I’m a chatterbox among my circle), always daydreaming instead of eating, and I looked pale (it’s still a wonder how can he knew when I was wearing make-up that time).. He told me after we all went to our homes.. I was confused because I didn’t think I did what he said I did.. He asked me to go for a check up and I said I will.. That night, I thought back my odd behaviors and found that yes, I’m not being me and yes, maybe I should see the doctor..  
 
So, I went to a hospital with him (he insisted that he wanted to accompany me).. And that’s where I found out what is wrong with me..
 
Depression
 
A severe depression.. My mind was blank that time.. Like all that I can think about was ‘how in the world I got depression’.. I don’t remember how I walked out of the hospital but my friend said he kind of dragged me by my arm.. When we get in the car, I remembered I burst out into tears when he said I’m gonna be fine.. I wailed, I screamed, I cried, I laughed.. All the emotions just abruptly attacked me in all directions.. Words came out of my mouth in jumbled and my friend just can sat silently while tried to comfort me(without any sort of skinship)..
 
My doctor didn’t prescribed me with any meds (actually my friend the one who refused it).. My friend was the one who took me to places.. He kindly took a leave for a week and brought me to vacation.. I was so thankful to him, he was the one who stood by my side when I got no one(I didn’t told my family yet, even now).. He makes me do lots of activities.. He asked me to always remember God and asked mercy from Him.. At that time, I just realized how lucky I am to have such a good friend like him.. I’m forever in debt with him..
 
I’m getting heal.. With the depression going on, I was in writer-block.. I’m sorry it had to be like this.. At first, I was gonna keep my condition shut because I thought I could finished the last chapter after my outstation but it seems like it’s not.. I was feeling guilty and ashamed about it that I thought bad things.. That’s when I thought I have to tell you guys at least a bit about my condition before I’m going crazy but seems like I told you more than I want to.. But, I’ll still try my hardest to write the last chapter as soon as possible (I was halfway when the writer-block hit me)
 
Please be patient
 
 
 
Please wait for me
 
 
 
 
And
 
 
 
Please pray for me
 
 
 
Thank you, I love you
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Forever thankful, Jung Haewon