It was a chilly day in winter when Sunggyu first met Howon. Sunggyu was 7 and Howon was 5. Sunggyu’s mother introduced Howon to Sunggyu:

-    This is Howon, your new brother. Howon comes here, don’t be shy baby. Say “hi” to Sunggyu, your elder brother.

Howon hesitantly approached Sunggyu. He widened his eyes when said: “Nice to meet you hyung. Please be nice to me”. Howon’s such a cutie baby that Sunggyu couldn’t help but to pinch his cheek: “You’re so tiny and cute! I really like you”. That Howon’s ears got redder and redder made him more like a little angel. He hugged Sunggyu by his waist: “I like you too hyung”.

Since that day, Howon became Sunggyu’s little brother. Howon himself didn’t notice but he had the ability to make everyone around likes him. How could people resist Howon when his cheek was so chubby to pinch, his eyes were so big and shined like stars and his ears were so red when he got embarrassed. All those things made Howon the most adorable baby in the word. Everybody, strangers or relatives, can’t stand kissing and hugging him. In some aspects, it was good that Howon got people like him but sometimes it could be dangerous. Sunggyu, being an older brother, must have protected Howon with the love of a hyung but people couldn’t control their heart. The more Sunggyu stayed by Howon‘s side the more he loved him with the feelings of lovers. That was so wrong, so erroneous but Sunggyu was so deep in this forbidden love, he couldn’t escape now. Sunggyu couldn’t express his feelings to Howon so he used all he got to protect his little brother.

Sunggyu could even sacrifice his life for Howon although they weren’t real brothers. Once, that was when Sunggyu’s in grade 9 and Howon’s  in grade 7, Sunggyu had to stay on class duty so Howon went home by himself (They always went home together). An hour later, Sunggyu was walking home when he suddenly heard a scream. Approaching to the place the sound come from, Sunggyu saw a boy lying on a ground and a man hovering over him. Both hands of the boy were tied with a rope and he was crying: “Please…please stop, it hurts”. Abandon the boy’s imploration, the man took up his into the small hole of the boy. He kept on saying: “You’re so tight. I always want to do this with you from the first time I saw you”. All of sudden, Sunggyu heard a groan “Sunggyu hyung… save me…”. In that moment, the world felt like collapsing under his foot when he realized the boy lying there was Howon. Sunggyu couldn’t think straight anymore, he picked up a brick and hit it on the man’s head. Unfortunately, he missed and the brick smashed into pieces, which made the man stop and turn around in shock. Sunggyu yelled madly: “Yah, you bastard leave my brother" and shoved the man but he stood still. The jerk withdrew his from Howon and pushed  Sunggyu by his shoulder. Sunggyu’s hit the ground and before became unconscious, he heard “You little rat, just lie there, after I finish with this toy, you’ll have your turn”

Sunggyu woke up seeing all white: white sheet, white ceiling and white bandages all over his body. Remember what had happened, Sunggyu shouted out loud “Howon, Howon… where are you?”. He attempted to get out of the bed but got stuck because of the bed sheet. Someone approached him and said tenderly “Sunggyu son, calm down. Howon is okay, don’t worry”. Sunggyu brought his eyes to the saying one, he realized that’s his mother. He asked hastily “ Mom, where is Howon? Is he okay? I saw him be by a man. I tried to save him but I couldn’t. I’m so useless…”. Sunggyu suddenly burst into tears. His mother hugged him and rubbed his back “ Honey ah, calm down. A police walked past that lane and he saw the two of you both unconscious. The man Howon had already run away so the police brought you two to the hospital and doctor contacted us. Howon hasn’t awakened yet but he’s stable now. You can visit him later”

“ I wanna see him now”, Sunggyu shouted

“ You’re such a considerate hyung. Let me take you there”, his mother smiled at him and helped him stand up.

When Sunggyu saw Howon lying on the bed, his heart kept a beat. All Howon’s body was covered with purple bruises. He had a bandage on his head, on his wrists were traces of the rope used to tie him. Sunggyu sat next to Howon, held his hand and mumbled

“I’m sorry for not being able to save you. I’m a terrible hyung”. Sunggyu felt his eyes stingingly hot. He wished he the one’s lying there instead of Howon. How could he live now when his Howon, his little baby suffered such these things.

“Howon-ah, I promise I’ll protect you with all my life. I won’t let anyone hurt you again. I’ll find the jert did this to you and kill him”.

Since that day, everywhere Howon went Sunggyu followed. He wouldn’t allow anybody come near to Howon without his permission. He might be naggy and scary now and then but it’s all just because of Howon. Howon himself got an afraid-strangers-affection, especially men. Whenever a stranger man came close to him, he would panic and start yelling. Then Sunggyu would be the one calm him down “ I’m here, don’t be scared Howon-ah”

“You’re the only one whom I trust”, Howon hugged Sunggyu and whispered. “You will never leave me, will you hyung?”, he murmured.

Hugging Howon tighter and rubbing his hair, Sunggyu answered: “ I’ll always stand by you, my little kitten”.

No matter how the time went by, no matter how Howon grew up, with Sunggyu, he would always be his little brother, his always and forever love.