I wasn't sure how to start this, but my life was a mess. My boyfriend was dead two months ago, it was confirmed when I went to the park to see his body lying on the ground. It broke my heart how he suddenly left me that I was absent from school for a week, tell me I was exaggerating but that was it. I was broken and lonely without him. It felt like he was gone for a holiday, but reality hit me when I realize he was really really dead. There was no use of praying for him to come back or anything, because he was dead.

"If we're suffering, I want God to take me first before you" were his words.

It echoed inside my head and wounded me very deeply, because it was true. It really happened. God took him first before me. Mark, you shouldn't have said that so we'll live happily forever after.  You should have said that you want God to take none of us, or let us die together.

I was now standing in front of the library, the place I usually go to when he was still alive. So many memories buried inside this place, including our first kiss when we were hiding from Mr. Kim who was about to kill us for copying one another's homework. Suddenly, it was so clear inside my head. The feeling, the voice he was making and the touch. Our first kiss was very unforgettable and I wouldn't want to forget it either because it was one of the best things that ever happened to me.

Not too long after that, my thoughts were blurred when I saw Jackson walking out of the library. His expression was nonchalant and surprised. He has been a good friend of mine since I started dating Mark, because they were friends since childhood. Jackson was the only friend who knew exactly how I truly feel right now. "Oh, hey... Nahyun?" He called with a widening smile drawn across his lips. "What are you doing here?"

"Recalling memories," I said with a deep sigh while covering my eyes because I could feel my tears were already near the corner of my eyes.

"You know," he started while holding her close to him, a convinced smile was replacing his precious smile. "We should move on, I'm pretty sure he wants us to move on and be happy too. Don't overthink about it and let's go to the cafeteria with me. What do you think, missy?"

He's right. I wasn't supposed to be sad like this because Mark wouldn't even be happy if he saw me crying all day. I then nodded absently and looked down to my toes, not wanting to talk anymore because all I want to do is scream everytime I tried to talk. Jackson then led me to the cafeteria while still holding me close to him... he was always a gentleman. In the cafeteria, students were roaming around and some were chatting while having their lu