Even if we run into each other,
I want you to walk past me
Now one, two, again, one, two,
I want to forget you

Are my tears funny to you?
Is my heart easy to you?
I’ll count 1 2 3 and when
I open my eyes, go away

AN: mwhahah, I managed to trick some of you into thinking this was over or that this chapter would be an epilogue, but IT'S NOT. Sorry for not answering any of you directly about that, but this sneaky author wanted to pleasantly surprise you. If you can bear a little more What Comes After, hope you enjoy ;)

5. Ghost

They started alternating between each others’ houses after that, Jinyoung spending nights over at Mark’s when he didn’t have to get up early for classes, and otherwise Mark spending nights over at his place. It made Jinyoung feel a little guilty that they were both paying rent—their leases weren’t due to expire yet, and they at least wanted to spend a little more time together before committing to a move—but if it meant could spend the night in Mark’s arms and wake up to the sight of his face, it was completely worth it to him.

That morning was a Jinyoung’s-house morning, and he woke up to his alarm going off at 8, alerting him it was time to dress and get ready to head out to campus for Developmental Psych. Mark cracked open an eye beside him and muttered sleepy nonsense until he reoriented himself.

“Mmm, do you have to go?” he sighed, sliding an arm around Jinyoung’s waist.

“Don’t tempt me,” Jinyoung said, planting a kiss on Mark’s nose. “I have an exam.”

“What time is it? You did leave an extra hour to get ready right?” Mark’s arm started trailing lower. “For fun?”

Jinyoung snorted. “You had enough of that last night. Besides, don’t you have school today, too? I thought you had a paper due?”

Mark groaned. “You know, I love you a lot, but you really need to stop reminding me of these things first thing in the morning.”

“If I don’t, you’ll just move right in for the kill. I know you.”

“That you do."

They both got out of bed, Jinyoung's hips protesting a little, but seeming to take it better than they usually did. He'd been getting out of shape, but now he was back in form, as much as Mark was testing his stamina.

"You're coming to the pizza parlor after school, right?" Mark asked, grabbing his clothes. "It's another outing night."

"Where to this time?"

"I thought I overhead Jaebum mentioning something about a festival, but I don't know who's holding one and what for."

"Doesn't matter, I guess. If it's an outing night, it'll be fun."

"Amen to that."

After a thorough good bye kiss, Jinyoung hopped in the shower and got his things ready for class. The exam wasn't too bad— just a lot of essay writing that had him racing to finish at the last minute before class was dismissed. There was only a small gap before his next class started, so he had to run to the nearby cafe to pick up something for lunch, not having enough time to meet up with BamBam at the cafeteria as he usually did.

He checked his phone when his final class wrapped up and saw that he'd missed a call and text from BamBam. Class canceled,  Im heading ovr erly. Wld you stop at the mart 2 pick up tea bottles 4 every1? Thx.

BamBam was the one who carried Jaebum's card on him, so Jinyoung grumbled a little bit about having to pay for something out of pocket, but still made his way to the nearby mart. He apparently wasn't the only one who had just gotten out of class or work, since it was more packed than it usually was.

Jinyoung ducked into the fridge section and looked over his options. Everyone liked different things, so he had to go through each flavor and try to remember who wanted what so he wouldn't get any flack for what he picked out. He was stuck on the citron teas— were they the ones Yugyeom loved or hated?— when he heard the voice from beside him.

"Park Jinyoung?"

His whole body froze. It had been three or so years since he'd last heard this voice, but the memory of it was burned into his entire existence. How could he forget it when it had said the words that had set everything in motion? First with I love you, and then we have to end this before it gets worse.

He turned his head slowly, meeting Youngdal's eyes. It really was him. He didn't look much different from the last time Jinyoung had seen him, though it had been awhile. He had the same small, dark eyes, the same lips with the tiny mole above them, the same athletic build. Even his slightly wavy haircut hadn't changed.

Jinyoung felt nauseous at the sight of him. He shoved the tea bottles back into the cooler, turning his back. He needed to get out. He didn't want to spend a second longer in the same room as Youngdal, not after he had done so much to escape everything Youngdal had ruined in his life. He'd almost done it, too. Mark had been the way out of that horrible cycle, and Jinyoung was as happy as he'd ever been. The last thing he needed was all of it barging back into his life, uninvited.

As soon as he started storming for the door, a hand shot out and grabbed him. "Wait, Jinyoung, wait," Youngdal said. Jinyoung cursed the fact that Youngdal was much stronger than him, and no matter how hard he squirmed, his grip didn't slacken. "Come on, you can at least say hello."

"I have nothing to say to you," Jinyoung spat out.

"You're not even going to give me a chance to apologize?"

"You've apologized enough. You started everything with a 'Sorry, but-' and it never made up for a single thing you did. I really don't want to hear it anymore."

Youngdal winced. "Look, I know you're mad. But stop acting like I'm the only bad guy here. You sure moved on pretty fast for someone who was supposed to be in love with me."

"And what was I supposed to do, sit around and be your best buddy while I still had feelings for you?"

"Oh, so that's how it was? You did a really great job of showing it, dating everyone and their brother after we broke up."

"What, should I have carried on about my broken heart and given you something else to lord over me?"

Jinyoung was practically panting in anger, so it took a moment to realize that people were starting to stare at them. They'd been hissing everything rather than yelling, but if people were starting to eavesdrop, they'd wind up being overhead sooner rather than later.

Youngdal followed his gaze. "Let's not have this conversation here."

"Let's not have this conversation at all."

"So you want to just go on hating each other indefinitely?"

"That was working out just fine for me."

"Well. It wasn't for me. Come on."

Using his grip on Jinyoung's arm, Youngdal steered him outside. Jinyoung was putting up enough of a fight that he could have gotten away if he'd had a little longer, but luck wasn't on his side. Starbucks was right next to the mart, and Youngdal quickly had him inside and shoved into an arm chair.

'I.don't.want.to.talk.to.you," Jinyoung said coldly.

"You said you were still in love with me," Youngdal said, folding his arms across his chest. "That's something you're supposed to talk about."

"Fine. I was in love with you a few years ago. But not anymore."

"And you dated all those people while you were still in love with me?"

Jinyoung glared at him. "I was trying to find someone who wasn't an enough to dump me because they were too scared to be gay."

"Judging by the number of people you dated, I'm guessing it wasn't so easy."

"Yeah, you could practically form an convention in this country from the amount of guys who are exactly like you."

Youngdal sighed. "You're harsh, you know? But I won't pretend like I didn't earn that."

"Good. You get how it is for me. Can I go now?"

"No. Because don't you care, even a little bit, how it is for me?"

"Nope."

"That doesn't sound like the Jinyoung I know."

"The Jinyoung you knew grew up."

Youngdal stared at him for a long moment. "I grew up, too, Jinyoung. Don't think I don't regret what I did to you."

"Regretting it doesn't take it back." Jinyoung stared at a spot on the table, refusing to meet Youngdal's eyes. "So, what's the deal? Are you engaged or something, now? Tying up all your loose ends?"

"What would give you that idea?"

"I vividly remember one of the reasons for our breakup being your mother setting you up with some CEO's daughter."

"Oh yeah. Joohee. We did date, but not for very long. The lying to myself didn't work out as well as I thought it would."

Jinyoung lifted an eyebrow and looked up a little. "Figures."

"I tried a few more girls, but I figured out pretty quickly it wasn't working. I knew that from the beginning, I guess. You and I were never a fling to me. That was just something I said... something I said like an idiot to make the problem go away."

"The problem," Jinyoung snapped. "Meaning me."

"Meaning me. I was more afraid about what loving you said about me than anything it said about you. It was just so much easier to push some of the blame onto you then. But I don't feel that way now."

"Convenient."

"No. Inconvenient, considering you still look like you'd happily stab me. If I'd realized this faster, we wouldn't have broken up."

"Well, you can't go back knowing what you know now, so just let it go. Maybe I'm an too for not wanting to forgive you, but I can't go back on that either. We already missed that chance ages ago."

"Did we, Jinyoung?" Youngdal stared at him intensely until Jinyoung finally met his eyes. "You see, I've also gone out with a few other people. Really gone out, I mean, not just as a cover. And like you, I've also not been able to keep a relationship going. Do you know why?"

"Because they're worried about their mommies finding out."

"No. Because they weren't you."

Jinyoung stood up from his seat as soon as the words were out of Youngdal's mouth, his blood rushing right to his head. "No. No, you don't get to do this."

"Jinyoung, just listen-'

"NO. I didn't spend five years getting over our breakup just to have you tell me that you loved me all along as if that makes it any better. You don't even know me anymore."

"I follow you closer than you think. I see your parents all the time, we're childhood friends-"

"I'm done!"

"- and some of my old friends from high school go to your university. I keep tabs. I know you're studying psych and have your own apartment. Your best friend at uni is a Thai kid named Kunpi-something. You're even more obsessed with pizza than you used to be and are always going to that cheapo place by your house. You've also seen several guys since university, but none of them have worked out." Youngdal looked at him, attempting— or maybe just doing it genuinely, Jinyoung knew he was trying to see the worst in him, but couldn't help it— to look sincere. "And every time I hear something new about you, I wonder why it has to be someone else with you and not me."

"Because.you.broke.up.with.me."

"Yes, and I was an idiot, okay? But I love you. God, I've loved you since we were kids, and I know you've grown up, but you're still the same stubborn and pretty Jinyoung you were, underneath it all. What do you want me to do about that?"

"Stop being in love with me! You did it before, you can do it again!"

"I never stopped. That was another lie I told myself."

"You didn't love me enough not to hurt me, so you didn't love me as much as you thought you did."

"I was sixteen. What do sixteen-year-olds know about loving someone properly? I'm not a kid anymore, I can do it right this time. I swear. Besides, you're still in love with me, aren't you?"

Jinyoung sank into the armchair. "Oh? I am? This I have to hear."

Youngdal frowned. "Why else would you turn into a serial dater? You can't possibly like all those guys you've dated, there was just way too many of them for you to get attached in that short amount of time. Weren't you just doing the same thing I was? Trying to find love, but really wanting the love you left behind?"

"Well, that was obviously what I was doing at first, I've already said as much," Jinyoung said. "But it wasn't all about you. It was about finding someone worthwhile, who wouldn't disappoint me in the same way you did. Maybe it didn't always work out, but that didn't mean I didn't have faith I would find someone else. And even when I was still in love with you, I never had any intentions of getting back with you. You'd already done enough damage, in my book."

Youngdal winced again. "And you didn't think, at all, that it never worked out because you really hadn't given up hope in me after all?"

Jinyoung bit his lips. Of course he'd thought about it, he'd thought about everything when it had come to Youngdal. It didn't escape him that in his drunken fits, it was more often than not Youngdal's name that came out of his mouth, or that the one out of all his failed romances, Mark and Jackson knew the most about was his one with Youngdal. The answer he'd arrived at had always been yes, maybe a part of him still wanted Youngdal and hadn't given up hope in him, but also that he would never trust Youngdal again, so none of it mattered. And now it mattered even less, because he knew now he didn't love Youngdal. He was in love with someone else.

"I have a boyfriend," Jinyoung said firmly.

"You always do," Youngdal said, a bit harshly. "I saw you guys holding hands at the Han River at the firework festival, or have you already found a new one since then?"

"No. Still him. And if you're planning on waiting until we break up, don't. I love him. And he's not going to do what you did to me, because his parents already know about us." Jinyoung took a deep breath. "I've moved on, Youngdal, and I already told you I can't forgive you. So you'd be better off moving on, too."

 Jinyoung had spent the entire conversation being the more furious of the two, but now Youngdal finally looked deeply upset. It had to hurt his pride, to come back crawling on his knees only to be rejected, but Jinyoung own pride wouldn't allow him sympathy. 

"I get it," Youngdal said finally. "If that's how you feel, then fine. But I'm not going to give up on you, now that I'm sure I'm still in love with you. I'm not going to waste any more time. If I have to go against another guy, I don't mind."

"Are you crazy? What are you going to do, challenge him to pistols at dawn? It's not going to change how I feel about Mark."

"Mark? You're dating a foreigner?"

"Have a problem with that?"

"Other than the fact that you're taken to begin with, no." Youngdal stood up. "No pistols at dawn, but I'm sure I can prove myself to you, somehow. You and I were meant to be together, Park Jinyoung. Another person doesn't change that."

With a wave, he started walking towards the door. Jinyoung in his breath, whirling around one more time.

"Lee Youngdal! If you try to mess with my relationship, I will never speak to you again, do you hear me?"

"Yeah, Jinyoung," Youngdal said with a smile. "But you said that at the start of the conversation, and look where we are now." With another wave, he walked out of the cafe, leaving Jinyoung to sputter in indignation alone.

0

Jinyoung's university gave all of its students free access to the gym, but he rarely used it. The guys who frequented it were all buff and slightly terrifying, and besides, Jinyoung thought he had a fine enough body as it was.

But today, he was ready for a date with the squash court. He didn't even know the rules of the game or if it was the kind of sport where it was okay to play by yourself. All he knew was that he wanted to smack the ever-loving crap out of something, and a squash ball was better than something human.

He threw the ball, and when it bounced off the wall, he nailed it hard. It took awhile to get the right rhythm going and figure out the places where it would rebound instead of falling flat on the ground, but once he got it, he let loose completely, terrorizing the ball and cursing spectacularly with each hit. ing Youngdal. Who gave you the right to come back to my life and try to ruin it a second time? you.  me who fell in love with you.

He couldn't put anything he felt into gentler language. He'd always known that chances were good that he'd see Youngdal again soon. They weren't exactly small town kids who couldn't avoid each other, but the fact remained they had acquaintances in common and Jinyoung's family was still as close as ever to Youngdal's, in spite of the tension between their two sons. He'd known, but he hadn't realized it would still be this frustrating, even after the time that had passed. It was like his anger had intensified because it had come during a time of happiness, a time when he deserved a little peace and time to enjoy his good fortune rather than this.

But it kept coming back to him that it hadn't always been this bad. There really had been someone worth loving inside Youngdal back in the day, someone good before he'd turned it all bad. They'd been best friends and confidants, had done everything together, and even though the ending had soured his memory a little, Jinyoung still considered his first kisses with Youngdal to be something precious. Maybe that person still existed inside Youngdal, somewhere, but it was also just as likely that the person who had broken Jinyoung's heart still existed, too. It would take a second chance to figure that answer out, and whether Youngdal was worth it or not, Jinyoung couldn't give it. Not when he was in love with Mark.

Mark. Jinyoung gave the ball another whack. He couldn't let Youngdal anywhere near Mark. He had no idea how Youngdal thought he could "prove himself" over Mark, but no way was he going to let anyone having to do with him hurt the person he loved. He and Mark had both gone through enough in the process of falling in love with each other, and they didn't need anyone getting between them and making it worse.

But then again, Mark had already seen the ugly part of his past. That was almost all he had ever seen of Jinyoung up until the past few months, and still he'd managed to fall in love with him somehow. Mark seemed almost impervious to all the baggage Jinyoung came with, all the previous boys and kisses and even ual encounters that had happened before him. If he was fine with all that, wouldn't he be fine with this, too? Jinyoung wasn't going to turn his back on him, after all. Mark had to understand that.

He whacked the ball a few more times, but his anger was slowly simmering. Probably the worst was already over at this point. He'd seen Youngdal, they'd had their argument, and Youngdal knew where they stood. It had been difficult, but what about love was easy, really? As long as he stuck to his guns, he could get through it.

With one last firm smack, he finally gathered his things and left the court. He pulled out his phone, still silent from school, and saw the long list of missed calls and texts that had amounted.

"Oh ," he said, smacking his forehead. "Outing night." It wasn't late enough that he would have missed it yet, but the guys were probably all still worried about why he hadn't shown up when he said he was going to, and where the hell their tea bottles were.

Instead of reading through everything he missed, he immediately called Mark, who answered on the first ring.

"Where are you?" Mark asked, sounding tense. "Are you okay?"

"Something came up. I don't think I'll be able to go tonight."

He heard the muffled sounds of Mark saying something to the other guys before his voice came back to Jinyoung's speaker. "I won't be going either, then."

"You don't have to sit out on my account."

 Mark ignored him. "When will you be back at your house?"

"In a few minutes."

"I'll meet you there." He paused. "Jinyoung, are you okay?"

"In a manner of speaking. Let's talk when I get there, okay?"

"Okay. Walk home safely."

Jinyoung doubted anything was going to happen to him on the shopping district-inhabited main road that led up to his apartment, but then again, he hadn't expected to be ambushed at the mart either. He hugged his jacket close to his chest and walked with his head down. Let's not run into any more ex-boyfriends tonight. Let's just make it to the one person I actually want to see.

He didn't know how he'd gotten there so fast, but Mark was already waiting on his front steps when he arrived. "You cut out of work early?" Jinyoung asked, clearing his throat.

"An hour or so early barely counts," Mark said, shrugging. "Everyone understood. What happened?"

Jinyoung waited until after he'd unlocked the door and they'd both made it into the elevator before answering. "I ran into Youngdal."

The look Mark gave him was inscrutable, which Jinyoung couldn't blame him for. How were you supposed to react when your boyfriend ran into an ex, and not just any ex, but THE ex that had led to all the others? He probably felt any number of things, but had to be careful how he expressed it, for Jinyoung's sake.

"Are you okay?" Mark asked again, finally.

"Yes and no. I'm better now. I went to the gym to take out some aggression, but I should have called you guys first thing. I'm sorry."

"Don't worry about that." Mark waited as Jinyoung unlocked the door to his apartment. "What exactly happened?"

"It was BamBam making me get those stupid tea bottles. Youngdal was at the mart, and then when we started making a scene, he dragged me off to Starbucks so we could continue fighting."

Mark smiled faintly. "I hope you gave him a piece of your mind."

"I did. I didn't even want to talk to him in the first place, but he insisted. I thought he just wanted to keep apologizing and make himself feel better, but-"

"But..."

Jinyoung exhaled slowly and looked Mark directly in the eyes. "He claims he's still in love with me."

Mark's reaction was again hard to read. He exhaled, and his hand reached out to Jinyoung's, curling their fingers together, but his face didn't show anger or jealousy or anything. Jinyoung wished for a moment that Mark would stop worrying so much about his feelings and just show him something. Mark probably had some illusions of Jinyoung being a fragile person thanks to his repeated heartbreaks, but on top of that, Jinyoung was still strong from everything he'd put up with. Strong enough to handle Mark's hurt, if that's what it came down to.

"How did you react to hearing that?" Mark asked.

"It's just so like him," Jinyoung said. "He would wait until I'd 100% moved on to pull out that crap. He said he'd been keeping tabs on me, so I bet he knew. He saw us holding hands at the Han River. Kind of funny, since you said no one who knew or cared about us would notice."

"I've been wrong before." Mark smoothed the pad of his thumb along the length of Jinyoung's ring finger. "So he loves you, huh."

"He loves a memory," Jinyoung said sourly. "I'm not the person he dumped anymore."

"No, Jinyoungie. But you're better. I wouldn't be surprised if he fell in love with who you are now, if he knew anything about it." Mark squeezed his hand. "But I don't really give a crap about how that guy feels. You're the one who matters to me. How do you feel about it?"

"I'm pissed, honestly," Jinyoung said. "I mean, good on him for coming to terms with himself, finally, but I don't deserve to be ed around with in the process, you know? I bet he still hasn't even told his family yet, and even if I did say yes to him, it would be an issue further down the line. His family is super rich and wants him to marry well. There's no way they're going to react without putting up a fight, like mine." He tapped his fingers on the back of Mark's hand. "Besides, it's far too late. I'm in love with you."

"But if I hadn't talked to you that day in 1000₩," Mark said, tilting his head, "would you have said yes?"

Mark's expression looked genuinely serious, so Jinyoung thought about it for a moment. "No. I would have questioned myself over it, but no."

"And why not?"

"Because I don't trust him," Jinyoung said simply, "to choose me over the rest of the world. I just don't."

"So that's always the last piece in your ninety-nine and a half percent, huh."

"Except there is no ninety-nine and a half for him anymore. All 100% is for you. I don't know why you're asking."

"Because I changed something by talking to you that day. I just wanted to know what."

"You changed everything," Jinyoung said firmly. "And don't wonder. I'll tell you the same thing I told Youngdal. You can't go back knowing what you know now, and I can't either. I don't want to go back. I want to stay right here. The only ending I want is the one where you talked to me that day and we fell in love."

"Yes." Mark lifted up a hand and played with his hair. "I know."

"Mark?"

"Yeah?"

"Aren't you going to tell me how you feel about it?"

Mark laughed quietly. "You really want to know?"

"Of course I want to know. If you're thinking it would be okay to just hand me over to my ex, I'd like you to warn me. He says he's going to go up against you for me, you know?"

Mark forehead wrinkled. "Up against me? What does that even mean? Pro wrestling?"

"Pistols at dawn, I thought," Jinyoung said, finally smiling.

"Let's see, then. Part of me is glad this happened. You'd have to deal with this guy eventually, and I think you can understand why he's the kind of guy I wouldn't want hanging over our relationship. I mean, if you think about it, he's been there from the beginning. The reason why you started coming here— during my shift, at least— was because of him."

"I guess so."

"But at the same time, I hate that you have to go through this, because I know it brings up unhappy memories. Even if you don't love him anymore, it has to ."

"It does."

"And I'm pretty happy, honestly. That even seeing him again didn't make you change your mind about me."

"I'm not that indecisive. I wouldn't have told you I loved you if I wasn't serious about you, okay? Because I knew you were serious about me and I like you too much to mess around with that."

"I know." Mark leaned forward and kissed Jinyoung's forehead. "I know."

They remained like that for a long minute, Mark's cheek pressed against Jinyoung's forehead. He felt warm and soothing, and Jinyoung wished he had thought to come to him first, rather than going straight to the squash court. There was no way he could think about anything bad like this. All his anger and frustration faded within, knowing that it would never be bigger or more important than everything Mark fueled inside of him.

It was only when Mark finally pulled away that a single bothersome thought came creeping back. "He's going to do something, you know," Jinyoung said softly. "To split us up. He'll think of something."

"And what, are you planning on giving into that?"

"No."

"Good. I won't either."

"You already know everything bad about me, anyways."

Mark snorted. "Don't call them bad things, Jinyoungie. How would I have been able to see you so often if you didn't go through those things, exactly?"

"I know. Sometimes I just wish the circumstances were different." He leaned into Mark's shirt so the words would come out muffled. "You should have been my first love," he murmured.

"First love isn't everything," Mark whispered back. "Just love. And we have that, don't we?" 

0

For the first time in a long time, Jinyoung dreamed of the day it had happened. He remembered it down to the last detail, the feeling of the crumb covered sofa, the plaid blanket thrown over their legs, the lingering butter from the popcorn they'd eaten on their fingers. The movie winding down on the TV screen, the heroine tearful and resolute after leaving her husband, the same husband she'd been so in love with for the first half of the movie. Tears silently fell from her eyes, but she didn't seem miserable, Jinyoung thought. Only sad for the good times left behind, but still ready for what came next.

"God, you cry every time," Youngdal said, throwing his pillow at Jinyoung's face. "You love these sappy movies."

Jinyoung brushed his tears away quickly. "It's just so sad," he said, throwing the pillow back.

"What is? That husband guy was an . I'd be thrilled to get rid of him if I were her."

"But why don't people in love stay in love?"

Youngdal stared at him. "If I knew, I'd earn a billion dollars writing a self-help book, not tell you. But how the hell am I supposed to know?"

"I don't know. And that's it, how is someone supposed to know when they sart loving someone that they're going to stop one day?" Jinyoung rubbed his eyes fiercely. "And isn't that just the saddest thing, not being in love with someone anymore?"

"Well. They can always fall in love again. With someone better."

"But if they stop loving that person, too? What if it's just impossible for love to last forever?"

"Why are you so worried about this?"

"Because I don't want anyone I love to go away."

Youngdal's eyes widened. "You love someone? And you didn't tell me? Traitor! Who is it?" He sounded so mad that Jinyoung drew back in surprise.

"What are you angry for?"

"One. Because I'm your best friend. Two. Because whoever it is... definitely isn't good enough for you."

"You're just saying that without even knowing who?"

"Will whoever it is put up with your sappy movies? Will they pay for all your pizzas? Will they carry your huge stack of books back from the library for you? Will they share all their comics because they know how much you like Spiderman? Do they love you as much as the person who already does all those things for you does?"

"Wait, Youngdal. Are you saying...you love me?"

It was then that Youngdal grabbed his face and smashed their lips together. It wasn't a very pretty kiss. Jinyoung had always thought so. They'd kissed before when they were little, little baby pecks that didn't count, but even those were more charming than this one. But it was still good, in its own way. It was the answer to feelings he'd long been harboring, a firm confirmation that he wasn't wrong about himself and what he wanted. And it got better, little by little. Youngdal relaxed and he relaxed, and was like a real kiss, a kiss as brilliant and heart pounding as the ones in the movies.

Youngdal was the first to pull away. "I love you. I didn't know how to tell you that before now, but I do."

"But will you forever?" Jinyoung whispered. Stubbornly.

"I don't know. Maybe we'll find out?" Youngdal smiled. "I think yes, though."

Jinyoung had been so happy at the time. He remembered that, the incredible burst of emotions, the feeling of this is the happiest I've ever been and ever will be. But even then he had wondered, eyes turning to the side to catch the closing credits and the tearful heroine sailing off into the unknown distance, if it would only exist for a moment and not a lifetime, and if one day he too would be facing that unknown future, not just once, but over and over again every time love left him.

0

He woke up in tears, and Mark kissed every single one of them away. "I'm here," he whispered.

For how long?, Jinyoung's heart asked. Forever?