It began to hurt so much more after I left you. Was it wrong to hope that you would hold onto me? You don’t love me. Please don’t love me. – Love & Hate

 How hard for you to be left behind by the person you loved the most? To the part that you’re not ready to give up yet? Sometimes, have you ever think to prepare for this time to come? Do you list the dates that you will forget him/her? Do you set the time that you will not remember him/her? Do you know that someday you will not love the person you thought for a life time? Are you ready for love?

“What have I done?” I just scratch my head out of frustration because I woke up in another house. I hurriedly get my things then left the house without knowing who the owner is. Ugh, I don’t remember the last thing I did yesterday. Did I go to a birthday party? Did I go to bar? Friend’s house? Why can't I remember? I walk along the street, it seems familiar and quite near at my workplace. “Ouch.” All of the sudden, I’m out of balance because of my high heels but someone help me. He extends his hand to me. “Oh, thanks.” I looked at him, he’s wearing beanie and a glasses. “You’re welcome.” He smiled at me but then again my things were suddenly snatched by a guy in a motor vehicle. I tried to run and he does too but my feet are hurt. He chased the snatcher until they are out of my sight. I’m in front of the traffic lights, trying not to cry but my chest, it’s so hurt. Why am I having a hard time but you’re not? You didn’t even try to catch me when I fell. Is this one sided love? Are you happy now, aren’t you? If you just see me. Unexpectedly, when I heard the stop light turns to go light, it feels like things really do change so fast. You will never know when will happen.

As the rain started to falls, my heart melts. I wanted to cry. Things are gone crazy in just one day without you in my life. How can I live without you? It’s been a year but you’re still hurting me. Or is it just me who’s hurting my heart? Thinking that I will get you back once again at my side is impossible right now.  I walk along the street, without brolly. Let the rain touches my skin and made it wet. Can the rain wipe all the pain? I’m out of my mind, walking while looking at the ground until I bumped into someone. He shared his umbrella to me looking at me with his woeful eyes. He’s the one who used to be my safe haven. I can’t help myself but to cry hard in front of him. How can I manage to act like a lost child in front of him? “(insert your name), please don’t cry.” He gently whispered my name in my ears. All at once he hugs me without knowing if I wanted to be hug by him. But I can’t help not to hug him back. I still love him. It’s not obsession but I can’t get over you. Actually, I only have you. When you’re gone my world falls apart. “Minseok, how to forget?” I think you will never get the answer until he said so.

I have died every day waiting for you. We went to his house. Let’s say I went back to his house from this morning. I still can’t remember all what happened earlier but now the memories slowly coming back. So, did something happen between us? He comes near to me then I step back. “Don’t touch me or else.” I told him. “Okay if you say so. I won’t do anything to you. Just change your clothes.” He explained. It’s been a year and there are a lot of changes in his house we used to share befor