"that llama"

I hissed gripping my phone tighter before putting it back into my purse..how could she I thought..

"what's wrong?"he leaned over turning to me noticing how my mood changed..

"nothing---" I faked a smile at him and he surprised me when he took my hand that was crossed over my chest and intertwined his fingers with mine...with eyes widened I looked around then at him afraid someone might see us but he shrugged his shoulders like it was nothing and smiled at me---a smile rare for his fans to see..

"jongin-ah! you can come out now.." our attention turned to their manager calling him for the fansign event..

"don't worry babe everythings goin' to turn out well" he seemed so relaxed as if it's nothing.. "just go with our plan and trust me with the rest okay?"

*our* plan?more like *your* plan, I thought in my head...because I thought were going to keep it low since the scandal came out of me dating him and now, all of a sudden he just wanna go all out in public...well---yeah I should be happy about it,but I dunno, it felt something was off, i feel uneasy about it...but I don't want to let him down though so I just have to go with his decisions..

Last night I consulted Amber about it and unlike of what I expected as her reaction, she seemed happy with it----for me..and for unknown reason, it pissed me off..

Flashback..

"what???congratulations??that's it?!!really Amber?" as I looked at my bestfriend-member with disbelief..

"I came all the way here in your apartment because I don't know what to do or what this might turn out and here you are only joking around...c'mon stupid let's be serious here please"I said almost a beg..

"then---what should I say...don't go and let him misunderstand again? Stand him up? Can you?" She smiled at me shaking her head before gulping down her last portion of beer,her face distorted because of it's aftertaste..

"i told you this is not my kind of beer, you should have just brought me boba instead....urghh---it's too bitter for me...I can't take it" she grabbed more cheetos and shoved a large amount in and ate like a little kid..just then I realized she already finished a few cans while I was still on my first.

"pshh says the one who drank six cans in a row" I hissed..

"you never listen to me" she heaved a deep sigh and I thought for a moment she looked at me straight in my eyes and I could'nt figure out what was in her head..

That moment was cut short when she started to hiccup and she giggled away..

"okay it's getting in me--but okay seriously why don't you just fully trust him with this...you two are both idols, and okay theres the fans...everybody would be divided with their own opinions---judgements but hey I know he'll protect you from jealous bashers with everything he can.."she huffed making her cheeks puff and yeah she looked cute..

I shook my head looking at her grinning widely at me...her cheeks were flushed red as she repeatedly blinked her eyes at me..then she chuckled.. She groaned as she hit her chest with her palm a few times making me hit her hand away to stop her...

"yah--yah!!stop it..what's wrong?" I held her hand down..

"i---am restraining something from doing something stupid.." she said making me just stare at her cluelessly..

Well I kinda get it what she meant but I can't get myself to confirm whatever it is..but somehow I still felt the urge to ask her but I lack will to do it...I know she would just answer me the way she did five years ago..

"come on let's get you to bed stupid" I held her up to support her..

I felt her arms wrapped around me though but I ignored it thinking she just held unto me 'cause she felt dizzy..I found myself still in her arms when whe finally reached to foot of her bed...

"uhh--Amber were here" I tapped her shoulder for her to let go...

She did let go of me and threw herself in her bed..I decided to tuck her in before going home...She was groaning and I thought she was already asleep but got surprised meeting her eyes while I was hovering right above her securing her sides with pillows...

"what do you want me to say?"she asked softly her voice is sincere this time and I wondered if it's just the alcohol again.. "you told me you wanted this---you dreamt of this but you don't want me to congratulate you..." I wondered if it was hurt I was seeing but then again it might just be the alcohol cause she never acted this way before... "you want me to be happy for you----I AM HAPPY for you Krys...or am I that visible" she chuckled.. "am I?"

I decided to sit next to her and listen to her since theres something within me telling me to... Amber is totally an open book when she's dr