There are three things in life that you can never get back once it’s gone. 

Time, opportunity, and words.

Jieun always believed that she has made good use of her time and opportunity.  If not, she would not have been standing where she was today.  The sweat and tears of endless practising to debut on stage was a testament of that.  Did she regret any moment of it?  She knew singing was her dream, but now that she was able to stand on the stage, she wondered if this was what she really wanted.  Because there was always a hollow spot inside of her. 

- - -

Jieun was sitting in one of the meeting rooms in the main KBS building, dressed casually in a simple white tee and jeans, a cap to cover her messy hair and a much needed coffee in one of her hands.  She had been practising non-stop, perfecting her performances for her song, Red Shoes.  With only 3 hours of sleep in her system, she was starting to feel a bit light-headed and delirious.

The producer for the end of stage had called her manager to have a meeting with her.  She wasn’t sure on the specifics but from past experiences it was usually to make changes to the performance.  However, only she was invited to the meeting, no one from EXO was present, which was strange.  Jieun wondered if the producer was not satisfied with her performance shown in the rehearsal video she and EXO had shot in the SM studio from the day before.

The frosted glass door of the meeting room opened and the middled aged man by the name of Producer Jung entered and greeted Jieun, “Hi IU, thanks for coming to this meeting today.  There are a few things I wanted to discuss with you.”

IU got up from her seat to bow to Producer Jung, unsure what he was going to say.

“Good morning Mr. Jung.  What did you wish to discuss?”

“The producing team have reviewed the practice video you and EXO shot the other day.  Don’t get me wrong, we think you guys are doing an excellent job but...”  He paused, as if unsure how to break the news to IU.  “We are thinking the performance needs a bit more impact.  You know, that wow factor.”

Jieun was not an idiot; she knew what Producer Jung was leading to.  She wondered why he was having the conversation with her instead of her management company.  Maybe her management had already agreed and this was just the formality.

“What do you think about adding a kissing scene at the end of the performance?  Of course, if you are uncomfortable…”

Jieun wanted to be angry.  She wanted to say, “Thanks but no thanks” but she knew things weren’t that simple.  If she offended the producer who knows what might happen.  Producer Jung had a lot of influence in KBS and he was in charge of Music Bank and who got to be on the show.  She wondered what made her management agree to this.  Jieun knew that they wouldn’t agree so easily if there weren’t something in it for them.

She had to choose her words carefully now.

“Would you give me time to consider it?  It’s a bit sudden at the moment,” She said, trying to keep her tone even and pleasant as possible.

Producer Jung looked enquiringly back at Jieun but accepted her answer.  “I will bring in Jongin to the next meeting then.  And we can make the final decision then.”

Jieun had not clicked that the kissing scene would be with Jongin until Producer Jung had mentioned it.  She felt a whirl of emotion stir inside of her.  Was she nervous to kiss Jongin or excited?  She didn’t want to think about it.

“Was there anything else you wanted to discuss?”  Jieun asked.

Producer Jung then took out a stage layout from the folder he had placed beside him and went through the sequencing plan of the dance.  Jieun quickly took out her notebook to note down the planning because she knew if she only listened to Producer Jung, she would have forgotten everything by the next morning with the lack of sleep. 

Impressed by her work ethic, he said, “I know we can always count on you on giving your best for the performance IU.  I have told the team to give you extra time for this week’s Music Bank for your comeback stage.”

“Thank you Mr. Jung,” Jieun responded back a grateful smile plastered on her face, with a small head bow.  She was so used to thanking producers and managers that it was second nature to her.  Her company always emphasized that she always needed to be humble and polite. 

- - -

Her manager had told her that the CEO of LEON wanted IU to upgrade her image a bit.  She needed to break out of the sweet girl look and go for a more mature image.  Jieun had glared back at Mr Lee when he said this.

“Do you know how unbelievable that sounds?  Do they really want a million EXO fans going after me?  What are they thinking?” Jieun argued back to her manager.

“Jieun, we’re going to just go with a kiss on the cheek.  It’s no big deal,” her manager countered back.  “Think of it as a performance, it’s like acting.”

If it had been anyone else, it would have been no big deal, but why did it have to be Jongin?  It wasn’t so much the kiss that was the issue either, it was more she hated how the management made a decision for her without even bother consulting with her.  Not that it was the first time it had happened.

She had refused to talk to her manager for a few days but during the final meeting with Producer Jung and the rest of the EXO members, she pretended to be ok with it.  JIeun knew there was nothing she could do.  Jongin didn’t say anything to her and she wondered if it was because Producer Jung was there or was it because he didn’t care.

Sehun had at least gone up to her after the meeting and said, “I think it’s rude they decided everything before telling us.  It would have been better if it was me, right?”

Jieun smiled gratefully at Sehun who was trying to lighten up her mood.  “It’s just that…”

“You don’t know what to do because it’s Jongin?”  Sehun finished for her.

She nodded.  It was at this moment, Jongin called Sehun to hurry up and go back to the van.  Sehun looked at both Jongin and Jieun and then pulled Jongin to stand in front of Jieun, “I think you guys should talk about it.”

“Talk about what?” Jongin asked but his smothering gaze was focused s