-four-

jiwon loves jinhwan, he really does. he loves the way jinhwan's eyes crinkle when he smiles, he loves the way jinhwan's cheeks puff up when he tries to hold in his tears, he loves the way jinhwan's lips move when he sings, and he loves the way jinhwan's eyelashes flutter when he feels jiwon leaning in for a kiss. jiwon loves jinhwan, he really does.

they don't really have secrets between them, having been friends for four years maybe, before they eventually got together. so technically they know everything about each other, and are always attuned to the other's feelings and thoughts, always there for the other. a touch on the arm when jiwon's too emotional to make right choices, a hand on the back when jinhwan's too burdened by his responsibilities, a kiss on the forehead when jiwon's too tired of the world, and a chin on the crown when jinhwan's too sensitive to ignore venomous words. all done with words unspoken. 

their relationship is, in jiwon's opinion, smooth, in the sense that there are rarely fights between the two of them, if at all. neither of them are hot-headed people, so there's really no cause for fights. both of them know when to back down and apologise when they know it is needed, so most of their fights remained as squabbles. and jiwon's proud of the fact that both of them have such a peaceful relationship. but to be honest, jiwon wouldn't want to be with someone else other than jinhwan, even if their relationship happened to be wrecked with misery, hurt, shouts and cries.

still, there was this one particularly ugly quarrel between them, both of them too high-strung, too stressed, too agitated, too emotional to think calmly, spitting out poisonous words and spiteful thoughts that neither really mean. it had lasted for a mere four days, but jiwon can never forget those four days void of jinhwan's warmth, jinhwan's colour, jinhwan's kisses, jinhwan. he can never forget how he had been so scared at the thought that he might have lost jinhwan for good, that jinhwan might not come back through the doors of their apartment and into his arms. jiwon wasn't, isn't, sure how he'd live if jinhwan really did leave. he's doesn't even remember the reason they fought, was it the large, rough hand that rested on jinhwan's nape for a second longer than the previous time it was there, or was it the long, delicate fingers that pressed down on jiwon's shoulders? either way, the only thing running through his mind when he saw jinhwan again, standing behind the door to their apartment was just thank god, thank god, thank god, thank god as he rushed to pull the sobbing jinhwan back into his embrace, his own tears falling as he lets jinhwan's scent and apologies invade his senses. and jiwon has decided then and there, he's never going to let go of jinhwan, ever.

-three-

jiwon remembers seeing jinhwan for the first time, wearing a denim shirt and black pants as he stands by a couple of mutual friends, thinking that he's too small to be a hyung, too pretty to be a boy, too different to be a close friend. jiwon's right on the first two counts, but he's just so relieved that the third was not true at all. 

jiwon remembers seeing jinhwan for the second time, on the streets in an oversized sweater and skinny jeans, a pair of headphones covering his ears with hands tucked in his pockets, lips parted a little as he looks around the streets with wonder. jiwon wonders how jinhwan caught his eye in the streets packed full with people. jiwon vaguely recalled his friend saying jinhwan just moved here, before he passed by without meeting his eyes, thinking there's no need to say hi since they weren't close. 

jiwon remembers seeing jinhwan for the third time, clad in a sleeveless top and ripped jeans, a checkered shirt tied around his waist as he looks at his phone, looks up to examine his surroundings, and back at his phone again, eyebrows furrowing and lips pouting. he's lost, jiwon thought, and that started off an inner debate on whether he should approach jinhwan or not. but he did went towards jinhwan nonetheless, because as much as he is unfamiliar with the other, jiwon isn't the kind of person to leave a friend in need. and jiwon's glad he had done so because that, was how their friendship began. 

-two- 

jiwon thinks living with jinhwan is quite possibly, the best idea he had ever had, and those who knows jiwon will agree. in the morning, just seeing jinhwan brightens up his day and clears up his monday blues or tuesday blues or whatever-day blues. morning kisses by his morning angel and maybe for his angel if he ever wakes up earlier than jinhwan, jinhwan's peaceful sleeping face before his eyes first thing when he wakes up, sometimes waking up to the smell of scrambled eggs, toasted bread and ham or maybe pancakes, jinhwan wearing just jiwon's large white shirt with hair sticking up two hundred thousand different ways after a particular steamy night. jiwon loves mornings with jinhwan, especially saturday mornings, when both of them get to lie in and cuddle and tease each other, tickling and play-biting, more on jiwon's part, giggles from jinhwan and guffaws from jiwon filling up their room. and jinhwan will whine about breakfast, dragging jiwon out of the comfort of the bed to begin their day. and honestly, jiwon doesn't mind spending every morning like this.

and in the night, when evening falls darker for stars to shine and jiwon comes home from work, a dark empty living room greets him, but he knows jinhwan's in the kitchen with the radio switched on and pan sizzling, wooden spoon in hand as he cooks, nodding his head and humming along to the music playing. an arm around the waist, a press of lips to the neck and jiwon will hop away quickly to the shower before he gets hit by jinhwan for distracting him. and dinner, fried rice, bulgogi, jjigae, japchae, or whatever jinhwan feels like cooking, held over conversations, talks of their day, jinhwan at his pet shop and jiwon at his school. then it's rock-paper-scissors at the end of each meal to determine who'll wash the dishes, but they both end up doing it either way because jiwon will whine and jinhwan will pout. and when they're done, a movie night maybe, or games, or a quiet night with books and handphones before they hit the bed, energy seeping away as the clock ticks and tocks. but of course, in bed sometimes a playful bite turns to a long kiss, a along the jaw and more. and honestly, jiwon doesn't mind spending every night like this.

-one-

jiwon's friends with hanbin and chanwoo, jinhwan's friends with donghyuk, yunhyeong and junhoe, and it's no surprise then when they start being friends that their circle of friends start to mingle too. jiwon didn't mind it at all because donghyuk, yunhyeong and junhoe are nice kids, and jiwon got to learn of jinhwan's stories, jinhwan's patience, jinhwan's adorably embarrassing antics, jinhwan's determination that made jiwon slowly, but surely, fall in love with. jiwon's life practically revolved around jinhwan, but he's not blind to his surroundings too. he didn't miss the lingering gazes of hanbin on jinhwan, the special smile that played around the lips whenever jinhwan's near or the hand that seems attracted to jinhwan's nape. he also didn't miss the blushes of donghyuk whenever jiwon talked to him, the little bit of extra care that jiwon alone received or the massages donghyuk offered whenever jiwon's tired. jiwon felt bad, because he can never reciprocate donghyuk's feelings, and jiwon felt complicated, because what were the odds that him and his best friend likes the same person? but maybe the odds were in his favour, because jiwon surely didn't miss the way jinhwan brightened up whenever he saw him, the way jinhwan's eyes naturally went to him wherever he was, the way jinhwan gets him to meet up over the weekends or the way jinhwan depended on him more than anyone else. jiwon couldn't bring himself to care about hanbin or donghyuk then, not when jinhwan's eyes held so much promise that maybe, just maybe, jinhwan's life revolved around jiwon just as jiwon's did. and it's true.

-zero-

"jiwon-ah?"

"arhn?"

they were resting on the couch, jinhwan flipping through a magazine at one side of the couch, sitting normally while jiwon plays around with the television remote control, body stretched out in a comfortable position with an arm supporting his head while his legs hang off the other end of the couch.

"i love you."

"why, why this sudden declaration though?"

jinhwan confesses simply as he stops turning the pages to cast a small smile at the back of jiwon's head. jiwon stops shaking his leg and turns his head as far back as he can to look at jinhwan, heart palpitating at jinhwan's words and though thoroughly pleased, he decides that teasing jinhwan comes first.

"nothing...just thought i should say it..."

"awwww, i love you too hyung! very very much!"

a blush paints jinhwan's cheeks and ears, his gaze returning to the magazine and jiwon can't help but coo before he pounces onto his small hyung, knocking the magazine out of his hands and buries his head onto his lap. jiwon then blows raspberries into jinhwan's stomach amidst shrieks and squirms and yes, jiwon definitely wants this to last forever.

thanks for reading! please leave some comments, i'd be glad to read any of them (: