// Six Years Old //

“Minseok, say hi. This is Lu Han, mummy’s best friend from university’s son.”

Minseok shyly poked his head out from behind his mother’s leg. Unsurely, he unclamped one arm from around his mother’s leg and waved his pudgy little hand slowly at the new boy.

The pretty boy beamed. “Hi, I’m Lu Han. Want to come to my room to play?” Lu Han shot a look at his own mother, making sure it was okay. His mother nodded slightly at him, smiling. He grinned back at her, before skipping over to Minseok, holding his hand out.

Minseok held onto his mother’s leg tightly, unsure if he should take the pretty boy’s offer or not. What if he wasn’t as nice as he acted and was mean to Minseok when his mom wasn’t around? Could he risk it? What if he wouldn’t let Minseok play what he wanted and bossed him around?

“Go on, Minseok,” his mother gently prodded.

He looked at the pretty boy’s outstretched hand, and making sure that it was clean and booger-free (he despised nose pickers-why would someone commit such a disgusting act?), took it cautiously. Lu Han’s smile only grew, and he squeezed Minseok’s hand, before pulling him up the stairs and through the hall towards his room. “Let’s be good friends from now on!”

Minseok, feeling the genuineness dripping off of the pretty boy’s words and smile, smiled back. “Okay.”

// Seven Years Old //

“Han, why do you live in Korea if you’re Chinese?” Minseok suddenly asked the boy, stopping his toy car in its path, causing Lu Han’s car to crash into his.

“No! We crashed!” wailed Lu Han dramatically. “What if this was real life! One of us could have died!”

“But it’s not real life, so it’s okay,” Minseok replied calmly. “Why do you live in Korea if you’re Chinese?”

Lu Han let go of his car. “I don’t know… mummy wanted time away from daddy? She said they needed a break. And something about a job offer here or something. I don’t know.”

Minseok turned to Lu Han. “Did they fight?” he asked, eyes wide with worry.

Lu Han looked away, biting his bottom lip to prevent it from quivering. “They used to shout a lot. They thought I was sleeping but I wasn’t.” His eyes quickly filled with tears. “It was sc-scary.”

He blinked, his long lashes quickly getting wet as teardrops fell from his eyes. He was too young to know the techniques of how not to cry. Of course, he would learn quickly as he grew older.

Minseok let go of his car and held out his arms. “Do you need a hug?”

Lu Han shook his head firmly, wiping his eyes with his sleeve. “Don’t tell mummy that I cried. I promised her I would be a man and not cry.”

Minseok frowned. “But why is crying unmanly?”

“Because it shows you’re weak.”

// Eight Years Old //

“Leave him alone!” Minseok shouted. “Or I’ll call the teachers!”

He stood in front of a Lu Han with his arms out protectively. Lu Han was slumped against the wall, tears falling from his eyes and stinging his bruised cheek and cut lip as they dripped a sorrowful path down his face.

“Whatever… stupid Chinese freak… go back to China!” The school’s mighty sixth graders hissed as they ran off.

As soon as they were gone, Minseok turned around to face Lu Han. He crouched down beside him and cupped the cheek that wasn’t bruised, wiping the tears on that cheek messily. “Are you okay, Han?”

“Am I really a freak?” Lu Han said, body trembling from a mix of anger and sadness.

“No you’re not! Just because you’re from China doesn’t mean you’re any different from us! In fact, you’re smarter, because you know another language! You’re still human, and you still have a brain,” Minseok tapped Lu Han’s head, “you still have a heart,” he tapped his heart, “and you still have feelings.” He gently wiped away the tears that were on the bruised cheek. “And you can still feel pain,” he said, giggling nervously as Lu Han winced when Minseok’s hand came into contact with his bruised cheek.

“Thank you, Minnie.” Lu Han gave a little smile, ignoring the pain that it caused his bruised cheek and cut lip to feel.

“Let’s go to the nurse now!” Minseok stood up and held out his hand.

Lu Han took it. “Okay!”

// Nine Years Old //

“We both made it, Minnie!” Lu Han screamed, jumping up and down.

Minseok’s eyes widened in excitement. “Really? Really really?”

Lu Han nodded enthusiastically. “See?” Lu Han pulled Minseok by the hand to the signboard, pointing. “Lu Han. Kim Minseok. It says our names, right here! We both made the soccer team!”

Lu Han hugged Minseok tightly in excitement. “Now we have to practice even harder!”

Minseok nodded eagerly. “We have to win our first game!”

They grinned at each other, high fiving.

Minseok swallowed nervously. The score was 2-2, a tie. There was only five minutes left on the clock, and they needed to win this game. Minseok and Lu Han were both put on as starters. Minseok was a right wing midfielder, and Lu Han was a striker. Their mothers were watching. They needed to win this game.

Their goalkeeper, Chanyeol, kicked the ball up. Minseok ran forward, trapping the ball easily. Go Minseok was heard from his mother, making him even more nervous, and slightly embarrassed. He deked the first defender, looking around to see who to pass to. Lu Han. Lu Han was open. He kicked the ball and it went directly to Lu Han. Lu Han deked the remaining defender, and it was one and one with the goalkeeper. Minseok could hardly believe his eyes. He glanced at the clock. Three minutes left.

“Go Han!” he cheered.

Lu Han glanced back at the last second, before turning back and kicking the ball… passed the goalie, and into the net… GOAAAAAAAL!

Minseok screamed-something out of his character to do, as he was usually very calm and mature for his age-before running over to Lu Han and jumping on him, hugging him tightly. When he pulled away, Lu Han had a slight blush on his cheeks and a shy smile on his lips.

They defended well for the remaining three minutes, and the game ended, 3-2 to them. Lu Han had tears in his eyes, and when he thought no one was looking, quickly wiped them away. But Minseok saw.

He tugged on Lu Han’s arm. “Tears show big emotions. Anger, sadness, fear, happiness. If any of your feelings are biiiig enough, you’ll cry. It’s not a bad thing! It shows what biiiig of a man you are, not afraid to show your feelings!”

Lu Han nodded, but still he wiped his tears away and swallowed the lump away from his throat. Minseok patted him on the head with a pleased smile on his face. “Come on, aunt and mum are calling! Let’s go!”

// Ten Years Old //

“You’re… you’re going back to China?”

Lu Han looked at the ground glumly. “My dad’s sick. He begged my mum to see us again, and for us to live with him for the remaining time… that he has left. And you know how mum got fired from her recent job. If there’s a good job there, we might stay.”

“But… but you can’t! What about me? You can’t leave me alone!” Minseok willed himself not to cry, but he could already feel his eyes start to tear up. “You know I have no friends other than you!”

“You can make new friends, Minnie,” Lu Han said softly, still not looking Minseok in the eye.

“But I don’t want any friends who aren’t you!” Minseok shouted, lump in his throat growing bigger and bigger.

“But you have to! Because I can’t stay here by myself, and I want to see my dad too!” Lu Han screamed. “Do you think I want to leave you, knowing I might never see you again? Do you think I want my dad to be dying? No, but he is! And I can’t do anything about it but I’m trying to deal with it! So you should too!”

Minseok forced himself not to blink, for he knew if he did the tears would fall. He was being stupid, really. Why was he always just thinking about himself? Lu Han’s father was dying. That in itself was terrible, and he should be sympathizing and comforting him, not being selfish and wondering how he would live without Lu Han by his side. Lu Han’s father was going to be gone; gone meaning Lu Han would never see him again. He could always see Lu Han later, and there was always the chance of bumping into each other. And they could stay in contact, email each other. He knew Lu Han didn’t even have an e-mail yet, but hey, he could force him to make one!

He blinked, and the tear ran down his cheek, shining and visible because of the sun shining on him. Through his blurry eyesight, he could tell that Lu Han was fighting back tears as well. After everything he’d told him about how crying wasn’t a bad thing, Lu Han still tried his best to never show his ‘weak side’ and be ‘manly.’

Today, that effort failed. As Lu Han blinked, tears ran down both cheeks, and he angrily wiped them away with his sleeve. He turned around, ready to run away to hide his ‘weak side’ when he was stopped by Minseok, who grabbed his wrist. Spinning him around, Minseok hugged him tightly, sobbing into the side of the taller boy’s neck. “I-I’m sorry,” he wept.

Lu Han’s body was racking up in shudders and sobs, tears now freely coming from his eyes. He clutched Minseok to him with his left arm, and rested his chin on Minseok’s shoulder, burying his face in his right arm which went around the back of Minseok’s neck.

“It’s so unfair,” Lu Han muttered, his voice cracking.

“Han,” Minseok sobbed. “I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry.”