{ o n e }

What does jealousy taste like?

[ Yoon Jeonghan ]

That day, the sky is bright—too bright even. Not only that, it is also hot—so hot, that it forces me to go find a good seat in a chilly place to prevent my body from melting and evaporating at some point because of the heat.

Isn’t this day supposed to be chilly and cold and all for it would only be three days or something before winter?

So, I look up to the sky and hiss vengefully at the almighty sun that hidden by the clouds for exactly three seconds only; why am I sweating like I’m drowning in hell now?!

A little bit grumbling and cursing my bad luck because cafeteria is fully charged even though that place sized two times bigger than gym, I make my way to the library. I don’t know where else I could go and that place popped up in my mind right out of nowhere. It is better than nothing, so I give it a try.

I walk slowly, too slow maybe, but not that I want to. It just, first: this so called world which feels more like a giant oven right now is draining my energy and two: I couldn’t even run while carrying my most precious thing in this world a.k.a my laptop in my right hand, my second most precious thing in this world a.k.a my beloved cold frappé on the other hand, and a medium-sized bag that is not covered well hanging loosely around my shoulder even if I wanted to. Risking the safety of those things that my college and hopeless life of mine couldn’t move without is too much.

Fortunately, after I arrive at the commodious place, the atmosphere is really welcoming and perfect to relax my overworked mind after hours of lectures from my beloved lecturer—sarcasm fully added at the word ‘beloved’ because I’m sure like 12524626% if murdering people isn’t illegal, he would be on my list. The top five, to be exact.

Not wasting time by thinking 1001 ways of hiding a dead body, I drag my feet to approach an empty chair in the corner. I notice there are plenty of unoccupied seats here and the absence of the librarian, but once I reached my spot, I simply shrug it off because that is one hundred percent none of my concern. In fact, it is better, right? I wouldn’t get scolded for using this bookworms’ heaven as my second bedroom.

After that, I let those troublesome items I bring scattered around the table that is only filled by me and get ready to fold my arms to be used as sleeping pads. Too bad this library doesn’t provide some fancy pillows or something.

But all of a sudden, a mop of brunet and a very much familiar face comes into view as I try to look past the window just beside me. Of course, I turn around so fast—too fast I almost get a whiplash—in order to prevent that person from noticing my presence. I have tried my best to be the most optimistic person on earth by thinking that seeing that very person is an accident only. I also don’t forget to pray for him to just keep walking the hell away. But apparently, God isn’t by my side this time and being optimistic isn’t enough yet as I feel my prayer crashed into pieces a second later because of a loud, annoying wail spelling my name like some good luck charm.

Spontaneously, I put my hands over my ears to avoid some permanent damage from that disastrous voice. Of course I don’t forget to cover my face with a bag and tried my best to pretend to be asleep, inwardly praying even harder for that annoying guy to quickly take a step back. No, scratch that. That nuisance better takes hundreds of step away from me and my existence for his remaining life time.

But as expected from my bad luck day, a thud is heard. Indicating a certain someone named Lee Seokmin, one of my juniors which I kind of regret knowing (not really, he is great sometimes, but still), is taking a seat in front of me.

"Hulo, beautiful!" He half-yelling in a sing-song voice. "What'cha doing here?"

And he tosses me a wink which I unfortunately catch.

I groan a bit as I put my bag aside so I could shoot daggers to his smiling face.

"What do you think you were doing to my beloved ears, you stupid excuse of a dongsaeng? Can’t you see I’m trying to get some sleep here?" I say, making it clear for him to see how much I’d prefer him to vanish in an instant rather than having some conversation right here and there. “And ew, what is that wink for? Gross.”

"We both know you love my voice just as much as everyone else do and—“

He doesn’t get to finish his words as I grab something—anything to make him quit bickering, or breathing, or both. He yells again instead.

“Aw! Hyung! That’s harsh!" He clutches his head to prevent another kiss from an encyclopedia I get from a book shelf just behind me.

I roll my eyes up, acting as if it’s nothing. "Whose fault is that, silly? You almost made ​​me suffer permanent deafness and something."

He gives me a pout. "And you almost made my brain got a concussion, hyung. Thank you very much," he says which I reply with a sweet laugh before saying, "You're welcome. It is unfortunate you didn’t get it though.” I fake a sob.

"You're cruel, hyung."

"Indeed.”

“And a waste of cute, sweet, angel-like face. Duh, you should have acted like the angel people think you’re instead of like something from the deepest of hell.”

"I did-YAK! LEE SEOKMIN! WHAT DID YOU SAY?!”

Lee Seokmin manages to avoid the book I threw at him. He grins triumphantly before putting his finger in front of his lips. “Hyung, this is library. You shouldn’t yell," he said calmly despite the wide words imaginarily plastered around his forehead: 'WHAT A BEAUTIFUL PITCH, HYUNG. EVEN MORE BEAUTIFUL BECAUSE YOU MISSED’. Then add a devilish laugh to make it perfect.

I nearly kidnapped that walking trouble, locked him in a coffin, and sent it to the middle of nowhere.

'You were shouting to me first, head.'

Too bad I couldn’t spit that back to him as I notice someone walking to our table.

Because our not-so-little noises, we successfully get a dozen of death glares from the bookworms. It is a miracle we aren’t expelled and banned forever from that place and that is only because today Lee Jihoon—another one of my juniors; specifically the star of music department—is on duty. He has just returned after completing his dealings with the Senate.

"What the hell is wrong with you guys, really?” he says exasperatedly instead of greeting us upon arriving at the table Seokmin and I occupied. "This is a library, as what written in the sign just above the door, for your information. Clearly not a place to shout at each other’s faces. If you want to gossip or whatever, go find somewhere else.” He looks sharply at us and puffs his cheeks. I could guess he tries to make it clear we need to get our asses out of here. But if anything, he looks cute rather than scary, making me wanted to stay here, squeal at him, and pinch his cheeks. But of course I know it doesn’t mean he couldn’t throw a guitar or two at us. Or at me, to be precise.

I give him a cackle. “Hey, that’s not how you talk to your hyung.”

He looks abashed for a second before mumbling something under his breath then starts apologizing.

I wave my hand, signaling it is fine. I am about to answer him more, but Seokmin beats me to it.

“Sorry, hyung,” he says with a pout visible. "I’m here only because Jeonghan-hyung is here, really. If he wants to gossip with me in the backyard, then I’ve zero problem." He points me and winks again. This time, even Jihoon cringes at the sight.

“It’s too hot in the backyard and cafeteria is fully charged last time I checked. Beside those two places, I don’t know where else to go,” I say, pointing at the cafeteria building that is only several meters away from where we are to point my proof. "I promise I will not come here for five days if you let me stay today and you can dump that nuisance if you want some peace."

"Beautiful, but cruel. You've cursed me how many times already, hyung?"

"YOU SAID WHAT?"

Jihoon rubs his face tiredly before sighing loudly. He looks like he is so done with our bulls. I feel sorry for him at some point, mostly because he has to deal with such nuisance like us every day. It is a miracle he doesn’t jump and rip our body but instead, he takes the empty pla