"Appa, look at my medal." Jihee called to her father after being awarded first on a singing competition. And just like how she wanted her father to react, he looked very happy and proud of his only daughter.

"You were so good back there Jiji, I wondered if it was really you who was singing." Mr. Park said as he carried his 5 year old daughter into his arms.

"Of course daddy it was me. I learned from the very best in the whole wide world." Jihee said as she extended her arms forming a big circle.

"Which is?"

"It's you daddy. Of course it's you. I love you so much in the whole wide world and thank you for teaching me how to sing." She said as she placed a kiss on her father's cheek. Her father couldn't help but smile and reply, "I love you too my sunshine."

 

===

 

It was Jihee's birthday and she was happily skipping on her way home with her babysitter, Miss Victoria, whom she calls eomma. She was excited to see her father who promised her that he would be home before her so that they could celebrate her birthday together.

But she didn't know that the scene that would be unravelled before her would scar her for life. Her father was lifelessly lying just below the staircase and a pool of blood underneath him.  She was six, she didn't exactly grasp what was happening. She didn't know why Miss Victoria looked so panicked, she didn't know why her father was lying there lifelessly, she didn't know why all the drawers and cabinets were open. She didn't know anything, but she knows that something bad has happened and the only thing she could do was cry.

 

 

===

 

 

It was raining, everyone was saying things Jihee couldn't understand. They were all wearing black like she was. She couldn't decipher what the adults were saying but she could see through their eyes, the look of pity. She wondered why they looked at her like that. She looked at the white coffin that was placed at the very front. She didn't know that her father was inside that coffin. All she knows is that her father is sleeping. That's what miss Victoria said to her.

 

===

 

She was seven when she all understood. She was being teased by her classmates for having no father during their program in school for father's day. That was when she understood what her Victoria eomma meant when she said that her father was sleeping. That was when she understood that her father was already gone, and would never ever come back. And just like when she was six, all she could do was cry.

 

===

 

 

Jihee was twenty-three when she finally got her double bachelors in Performing Arts and Music Compsition. It has been her dream to be able to produce her own music. It was also a dream she had shared with her late father who loved music more than she does. After she graduated she was also accepted as a composer in one of the three entertainment company in South Korea, SM Entertainment. Only a month of being hired and she has already achieved a milestone in her career. She didn't know if it was because of luck or her ability to compose, but as a newbie in the music industry, she was very thankful for being one of the selected few whose song was included in the latest NCT album.

Jihee was given permission to use one of the recording rooms to record the sample track of her song "White Night". While singing her sample inside the booth, she was too engrossed in her song that she didn't notice the arrival of a new person inside the studio.

 

"Hyung, who's that? Is she a trainee?"

"She's great huh? She could pass as an idol. Too bad she's not. She's the newest composer hired by SM."

 

---

 

"Eomma! Look at the trophy I won. Just like I promised, I got the first price." Jaehyun beamed as he showed his mother the trophy he won from tae kwon do.

"Good job son. Keep it up, now please excuse me, eomma is working." His mother said without even glancing at him or at the golden trophy he was holding in his hands. He was five years old back then, but he understood that his mom didn't have enough time for him. Even so, he knew she loved him so he just smiled at her who wasn't even paying him any attention and silently walked away.

 

===

 

It was Jaehyun's birthday and he was very excited to go home since his mother promised him that she'll cook dinner for them to eat together as a birthday present. He loved his mother's cooking but he loves her company the most. And since she promised, he came home very excited. He even told his personal driver to drive faster so that he could arrive home earlier and wouldn't keep his mother waiting.

Upon arriving home, he was met with silence. There was no one inside their house except for a couple of maids greeting his return. He asked them if his mother was already inside, but the maids shook their head. One of them said that she came home early but went out to work as soon as she entered. As the saying goes, 'promises are meant to be broken' and Jung Jaehyun had the first hand experience.

 

===

 

It was probably one of the most important things in Jaehyun's life. It was his graduation day in grade school. He was graduating on top among all of his classmates and he even received a lot of awards. Although that day, graduates are supposed to be happy, excited or even proud of themselves. It isn't for Jaehyun's case. He felt the exact opposite. He felt sad and dejected.

Every parent who saw him with his awards would watch him with envy and even compare their children to him. But what others didn't know was that it was him who envied his classmates. For Jaehyun, it was more important that his mother was present in a very important occasion than to receive a lot of awards. Sadly, it was only his personal driver whom he treated like his own father, who was present on a very important day. Although he was thankful towards him, it would've been a lot better if his mother watched him and cheered for him while receiving those awards. But despite that, he knew she loved him and he loved her like how a son should love his mother.

 

===

 

He was fourteen when all of Jaehyun's love for his mother vanished. Ever since young, all he had ever thought was how to please his mother. And that's all he did up until the present. But when his she said that she is getting him married to some unknown rich girl once he reached eighteen for her company, he refused. It was one of his dream to marry someone he loves and not even his mother could crush that.

"You useless child, be thankful I still let you live despite being a son of a ."

His mother said. He was mostly angry than shocked by what his mother revealed. With that said, Jaehyun stormed off, failing to see his mother standing with a shock expression like she was regretting what she had said to his son. But nevertheless, she did not stop him from leaving.

 

 

===

 

 

It's been seven years since Jaehyun got accepted in SM Entertainment. It also has been seven years since he stopped all communications with his mother. And it has been four years since his debut with NCT. Everything was going well in his career that he wished it was the same for his personal life. He felt that despite being one of the successful young adults in today's generation, there was still something missing. He couldn't point out wha it was.

After having gathered for a meeting for their new album, Jaehyun decided to visit the recording studio where he always practiced his singing when he was a trainee. He planned to practice his vocals and rapping so that recording fot their comeback will go smoothly. Once he entered the studio, and angelic voice immediately caught his attention.

"Hyung, who's that? Is she a trainee?"

"She's great huh? She could pass as an idol. Too bad she's not. She's the newest composer hired by SM."