Luhan doesn’t get Jongin. He finds Jongin’s attitude as confusing as a labyrinth and no matter how hard he tries to decipher Jongin’s words and actions, he just couldn’t fully understand. Jongin would call him in the middle of the night, only to hang up after Luhan says hi. Jongin would flirt with Luhan, make him feel like the only man in the world, only to have another man in his arms that night. Jongin would tell Luhan he loves him, only to walk away when Luhan says it back to him.

Maybe that’s what makes Jongin so addicting.

Jongin knows how to make a person obsessed, wanting to know more about him. Jongin doesn’t reveal anything about himself much, but once he does, everyone is left with the greed of desiring more and more, until Jongin eventually leaves.

Luhan knows this much because he’s seen it before. Two weeks ago, Jongin left Park Chanyeol once he’s being too clingy. A week ago, Jongin dumped Do Kyungsoo once he told Jongin he loves him. Five days ago, Jongin ended it with Byun Baekhyun because he talks too much. Just yesterday, Jongin called it quits with Huang Zitao because he demands beyond what Jongin can provide; commitment. You could call it a type of fatal attraction. Everyone wants to be with Jongin even though they know it wouldn’t last.

Luhan has seen it all. And he learnt from others’ mistakes.

Maybe that’s how Luhan could stay by Jongin’s side for almost three months.

Luhan knows it’s foolish to want to be together with a guy like Jongin. He knows this relationship—or whatever it is that’s going between them—isn’t healthy and he should probably give up. But Jongin always manages to come back whenever Luhan was about to put the weight on deciding to leave on the balance in his mind. And Jongin makes it okay again.

Luhan’s phone rang when he was already asleep. He doesn’t bother checking the caller ID because only one person would ever call him at this hour.

“Hi.” Luhan said groggily.

The other end was silent, like what Luhan had expected. The next thing he hears would be the unforgiving sound of a long beep, signalling the end of his call. Luhan waited and waited, but the noise doesn’t come. Is Jongin still on the line?

“Jongin?” Luhan asks, finally opening his eyes. Jongin’s behaviour is unusual today. He listened hard but couldn’t hear any scuffling noise or . Is Jongin alone?

Luhan wanted to ask what is wrong, but was reminded of Park Chanyeol’s mistake, and kept his mouth shut. He wanted to tell Jongin that everything would be fine because he is there for Jongin always, but Do Kyungsoo’s error flashed in his mind. So Luhan was silent.

Luhan wasn’t counting, but he knew it was a long time when his arm started hurting from holding his phone. He was close to ending the call, assuming Jongin had accidentally fell asleep when Jongin’s deep voice came from the other end.

“Tell me a bedtime story, Luhan.”

Luhan was wide awake then. His eyes went to the clock he had on his bedside table. It read 3:18a.m. Luhan couldn’t think of any but he fulfilled Jongin’s ridiculous request anyway, he just said the story that was on his mind.

“Once upon a time, in a faraway land, there lived two boys, Ken and Lucas. Ken was a prince and Lucas was just a servant boy, working in the palace. Ken doesn’t like to talk much whereas Lucas was the complete opposite. Lucas always wanted to be friends with Ken, and tried to talk to Ken but the prince doesn’t seem to like Lucas a lot.

Lucas does not give up and started to pay attention to the prince’s likes and dislikes. Lucas found out that the prince particularly likes dogs and also the bright smile on Ken’s face on the rare occasion that the queen allowed the prince to eat fried chicken. On other days, Lucas notice the frown on Ken’s face during piano lessons. Just like this, Lucas notes down new information he’s learnt about Ken.

Slowly, Ken started to open up to Lucas and the two grew close. But one day, the queen found out their friendship and was furious. How could a prince be friends with a servant boy? The queen ordered the maids to keep watch on Lucas so he would not see Ken ever again. During that time when Lucas was not allowed to play with the prince, he was devastated. Ken was sad too, because there isn’t anyone to follow him around anymore.

Ken took the initiative to see Lucas in his room and Lucas was delighted at the prince’s presence. From that day on, it was Ken’s turn to visit Lucas and the two boys never felt happier. The queen started bringing in other boys who came from rich and noble families but Ken didn’t want their friendship, his heart yearned for the servant boy.

One day, Lucas’ parents saved enough money to bring Lucas away from the palace, to start life anew. When the prince heard about this, he was sad. He did not want his best friend to leave his side. Lucas was torn between the decision of staying or leaving, and whatever decision he chose would hurt someone. Lucas was waiting for Ken, because if he said leave, Lucas would leave and if he said to stay, Lucas would stay.”

Luhan paused. He heard Jongin’s even breathing through the speaker and wondered if he fell asleep. Luhan was about to hang up when again, Jongin interrupted him.

“Good night, Luhan.”

And he hung up.

This time, the silence indicated something Luhan regretted. Luhan knew he screwed up. He shouldn’t have told Jongin that. Luhan had made the same mistakes as those boys. He revealed his selfish nature and now Jongin is going to leave him because of it.

Luhan’s hand fell limp on his bed as a tear slipped out of his right eye.

Exactly three days passed without Jongin saying a word to Luhan. No calls, no texts. Silence.

In a way, Luhan expected it since Jongin did the same thing to those other boys but Luhan thought he was special. He was Jongin’s longest relationship and somehow Luhan had thought perhaps Jongin loved him the way he had loved Jongin.

Well, the truth is always harsh.

He stood at his living room, looking at the surroundings and reminiscing moments shared with Jongin. Stolen kisses against the hob, heated make-out on the couch, steamy on the floor. Every nook and cranny of his house was concentrated with intimacy and Luhan couldn’t help but allowed himself to cry. Jongin wasn’t being fair to him. How could Luhan ever forget when the place he’s living in is filled with the scent of Jongin?

How he wished Ken would tell Lucas to stay.

How he wished Jongin would tell him to stay.

Luhan finally came to his senses.

Jongin dumped him and Luhan had to accept it. It’s already been a week and it’s no use to keep on waiting. Luhan was already Jongin’s history, even if Luhan wanted Jongin to be his future. Jongin moved on and maybe Luhan should too.

He leased his house, and was in the process of packing everything. Luhan really couldn’t stay there anymore. Jongin’s presence was too strong it was making Luhan go crazy. Luhan knows he shouldn’t, but deep inside, he had wished Jongin would show up in his doorstep, begging him not to leave. But then again, it was Jongin he’s talking about. The Jongin that does not do the commitment business. The Jongin that wouldn’t allow himself to be in a relationship.

Packing should be done in two days, and after that, it was really goodbye for good.

On the last night, Luhan went to the club. He wasn’t going to deny it any longer. Not seeing Jongin for a month was proving to be impossible for him.

The last time. I’ll just see him for the last time.

He entered the club, the smell of strong liquor and sweaty bodies hitting him in the face. Luhan headed straight for the bar, where he would be able to see Jongin’s spot clearly, but cleverly situated himself so Jongin wouldn’t spot him.

Girls were flocking around Jongin like usual and Luhan doesn’t feel too bad about it. He was much more fascinated by how hot Jongin looked that night. His usual brown hair was dyed black with his bangs almost covering his grey eyes. Luhan felt he was ready to pass out when Jongin gave the girls a y grin. The type of grin where Jongin would have a sultry look with a side of his full lips curved up.

Luhan sipped his drink while staring at Jongin with a solemn gaze. It was only until Jongin turned to look back at Luhan, a knowing smile on his face.

Luhan widen his eyes in shock. How did Jongin even know he was there? Half of Luhan was ecstatic Jongin noticed him; he was worthy of being distinguished and the other half was disappointed because that would mean Luhan had to leave. Luhan wanted to go against his rule but stood strong.

He was there just to check up on Jongin so he wasn’t doing anything stupid. He wasn’t there to be in a relationship with him again.

Luhan finished the content of his glass, left money on the counter and left. No turning back.

Luhan didn’t know he was being followed. Sometimes he wished he had Jongin’s sharpness but how could he stand a chance when he was facing the devil himself?

Jongin shoved Luhan roughly against his front door, trailing kisses down the nape of his neck. If there was one thing Luhan was good at, it was sticking to his decisions. Luhan put his hand on Jongin’s chest and lightly push him away. Jongin couldn’t keep his surprise from showing on his face.

“Luhan.” Jongin said with his deep voice. “Why?”

Luhan shook his head. “You should leave, Jongin.” He looked down at his feet. Luhan could see Jongin’s chest heave in and out, his breath on Luhan’s nose.

“Look me in the eye and tell me you don’t want to see me again.” Jongin said, moving his fingers down to Luhan’s chin, propping his head up.

Luhan’s eyes were red. He wanted to kiss the hell out of Jongin but his resolution was set. He stared straight and hard into Jongin’s eyes, making sure no tears fall out.

“I don’t ever want to see you again.”

Jongin gazed at Luhan’s face, trying to catch any glimpse of doubt. He knew Luhan was lying about him leaving, but Luhan’s way of dismissal was pretty heart-breaking. And Jongin wasn’t one to get his heart broken.

Jongin released Luhan, taking a few steps back. To be honest, Jongin wasn’t ready to set Luhan free yet. There was just something about that doe-eyed boy that intrigues Jongin. To Jongin, having Luhan was like a naughty kid still receiving presents from Santa. Luhan was too nice, too good for Jongin.

“Then can you invite me in as a friend?” Jongin asked, giving Luhan a smile.

Luhan’s heart skipped a beat when he saw Jongin’s stunning grin.

“Jongin, please don’t make this anymore difficult as it is.” Luhan said.

Jongin chuckled. “How am I making this difficult? You were the one who dumped me. And my status here right now is as a friend. Can’t I be your friend, Luhan?”

Luhan blinked in surprise. He would let Jongin in, but the situation in his house is a little bit…

Jongin put his hands in his pocket. “Well? You’re not letting me in?”

“Fine, come in.” Luhan inserted the key into the hole and twisted, knowing he would fully regret his decision when he opened the door and Jongin stepped in.

Jongin’s steps slowed down as he saw Luhan’s almost empty apartment. What’s left of it was only Jongin’s clothes, Jongin’s cup whenever he stayed the night, Jongin’s shoes (how did his shoes even end up here?). Luhan averted his gaze downwards, not liking the tense atmosphere. He shouldn’t have allowed Jongin to come in. That was a stupid mistake.

“What’s the meaning of this, Luhan?” Jongin asked, without turning back.

Luhan breathed hard. “I’m moving.”

Silence.

“When?”

“Tomorrow.” Luhan breathed out.

A heavy feeling weighed on Jongin’s chest. Things shouldn’t turn out like this. Luhan shouldn’t be leaving. Luhan shouldn’t be leaving him.

“And you didn’t bother telling me, Luhan?” Jongin asked.

Luhan sighed. “What’s the use of telling you? You don’t care about me anymore.”

“I guess it’s too late for Ken to tell Lucas to stay, isn’t it?” Jongin said sadly, slowly turning around to face Luhan.

Shock swept through Luhan’s face. “I—“

Jongin stepped closer and with every step, Luhan retreated until his back touched the wall. Luhan felt Jongin’s hot breath and he breathed harder.

“Jongin, please don’t do this.”

Jongin slammed both hands at the wall right beside Luhan, making him flinch. Luhan was held captive by Jongin’s hard glare.

“It’s punishment for not telling me.” Jongin whispered and started attacking Luhan’s neck with kisses. A few was all it took for Luhan to let out a moan.

It’s been so long…

It had been so long since Luhan truly felt Jongin’s touch that even the slightest contact made Luhan shiver. Jongin trailed his tongue to his collarbone, then moving up to Luhan’s parted lips.

Luhan was in a dilemma. He would love to let Jongin do whatever he wanted to his body—hell, he would surrender right then and there—but it would mean going through the same process all over again, Luhan would just get hurt. He could also choose to push Jongin away and yell at him to leave, but it could also mean Jongin leaving him for good.

“Stop…” Luhan breathed when Jongin started fumbling with his pants. Tears stung Luhan’s eyes when Jongin ignored his cries. His kisses became harder, his touch more demanding and his body way too close to be a normal make-out session.

Luhan held Jongin’s hand tightly.

“Jongin. Stop.”

But Jongin only shook Luhan’s hand off and grabbed it, pinning him to the wall.

“Stay. I want you to stay.” Jongin suddenly said, leaving Luhan speechless.

“Jongin…” Luhan trailed off.

“Stay.” Jongin gazed right into Luhan’s eyes. “Please?”

Luhan gulped. He finally heard the words he longed for so long. Luhan should be ecstatic that Jongin felt the same way but instead, anger riled up inside Luhan.

“You can’t just do this, Jongin. You can’t just barge in here and tell me what to do with my life. It’s unfair. You made me feel so loved, then you pushed me away. I’m not your puppet, Jongin. You can’t just come to me when you need me than throw me away when you don’t feel like it. I’m not going to be controlled by you, Jongin.

So please,” Luhan sighed, “leave.”

Jongin finally released Luhan. He slumped dejectedly, looking at the ground.

“I knew this would happen.” Jongin uttered under his breath.

Luhan furrowed his brows. “What?”

“That’s why I don’t want to be in a relationship, Luhan.” Jongin looked at Luhan sadly. Luhan noticed there were tears in Jongin’s eyes. Luhan’s heart stopped a bit.

“Because when I fall, I fall hard. And if the person I love leaves me, I won’t be able to take it. I’ve been hurt once, so if you leave me alone,” a tear slipped out of Jongin’s eye.

“I might just die.”

Luhan watched as Jongin bent down to carry his belongings. His heart was in pain seeing Jongin’s lonely back. Jongin may get all the girls and guys he wanted, but inside he was just a lonely boy looking for a comfort place. Luhan couldn’t bear it any longer, and wrapped his arms around Jongin’s waist.

“It’s not too late, Jongin. I’ll stay.”

Both of them stayed in that position for a long time. But Luhan was disappointed when Jongin gently took Luhan’s arms away. He stood up.

“No Luhan. You’ve made your decision very clear. It’s true I haven’t been treating you right, and it’s all my fault. You were right, Luhan. I should get out from your life.” Jongin said, cradling his things.

Tears flowed from Luhan’s eyes. “Jongin, I said I would stay didn’t I? And I don’t care about—“

“Luhan, stop. Being with me has hurt you in every way possible and I would never want you to go through that kind of pain again.” Jongin said, shaking his head.

“But Jongin, I sincerely want to stay here with you!” Luhan reasoned, holding Jongin back from leaving his apartment. Somehow, Luhan had a feeling that if Jongin took a step out of his house, Luhan would never see him again.

“Luhan, please. What you’re saying right now is a spur of the moment thing. You would regret it sooner or later.” Jongin said, giving Luhan a sweet peck.

“Until we meet again, Luhan. And when we do, I’ll never let you leave my side.” Jongin gave Luhan one last smile, before taking that step out Luhan’s apartment.

Luhan sank down to his knees, crying his heart out.

 Jongin said they would meet again, and Luhan would hold on to that promise.

Until we meet again, Jongin.