Darling, What We Have is Worth a Shot

The traffic light blinks thirty in green, the numbers decreasing in a steady rhythm with every flicker. The crowd of people below it stand in urbane silence, with hands inside their coats and eyes staring passively at the unhurried movement of cars before them.

It's another Friday afternoon in the month of March, yet even though a slight surge of ease appears to have pierced through the atmosphere in the light of the coming weekend, the city stays the same—still plagued by the omnipresent metropolitan bustle, the rushing and bumping into shoulders of people who never bother to either give or hear an apology.

Kyungsoo stands in the crowd with his weight focused on one leg and one hand clutched tightly to the strap of his messenger bag. His left foot taps impatiently against the pavement as he keeps his head angled towards the traffic light, completely unaware of the pressure he's putting into biting his bottom lip.

A flock of pigeons settle onto the jungle of electric wires above the stoplight, and Kyungsoo knots his eyebrows at the way the sound of their flapping wings is oddly blending in with the low murmur of conversation around his earshot. He briefly wonders back to a conversation he had with his roommate, Baekhyun, who asked about how birds manage to sit on power lines without getting electrocuted while in the middle of sketching the view outside their window. Kyungsoo remembers how he had rolled his eyes at Baekhyun before he reminded the latter that they both took a major in Arts for a reason.

Kyungsoo shifts his eyes to the digital watch wrapped around his left wrist. The traffic light hits ten while he tries to register the characters displayed on his wristwatch: '1:18 PM'. He curses under his breath; he's late, again.

The stoplight switches to red, and the people around Kyungsoo wait for the vehicles to settle before crossing the pedestrian lane. A huge green ten-wheeler truck screeches into a full-stop before the crowd, and Kyungsoo squeezes his eyes shut in reflex and digs his teeth deeper into the skin of his bottom lip when the truck blares it horns at the taxi cab it was tailgating. The angry driver, who was forced to stop by the red light, rolls his window down to yell a string of profanities at the taxi cab, which had managed to drive away before the traffic enforcer from the center of the four-way intersection blew his whistle.

Just then, the crowd starts to stir as they move to cross the lane. Kyungsoo makes it a point to sprint towards the other side of the road, using his arms to sift his way through the bustling sea of bodies while making sure to keep his messenger bag and his camera inside it from slamming against the side of his body. He makes his way to a sidewalk with lesser people, his head dipped down in a manner that makes him see where he's going but at the same time avoid having to meet eyes with strangers.

It doesn't take him long to reach the last few blocks towards the library, pace speeding up with the image of the menacing face Junmyeon would probably greet him with once he arrives. He's almost at the last corner, where the studio he'd considered working for before and the newly-opened pastry shop is located. He takes a turn and—

Kyungsoo finds himself staring up at the sky with both his arms propped up against the pavement, supporting his upper body. His face is twisted in agony due to a budding pain in his bottom, and it's only when his mind registers the sudden twinge on his left shoulder and the sound of someone apologizing that he realizes he'd landed on the floor after bumping into a person.

“Crap. I'm sorry!” Kyungsoo fumbles for the right words as he blindly reaches for his messenger bag. Fortunately, he learns that his messenger bag hit and settled against his stomach instead of the concrete. He sighs in relief as he watches the person in front of him drop down to his knees and wait, is that rainbow hair?

The ground around them is littered with things that Kyungsoo suspects spilled from the box the person he bumped into was previously holding. Still dazed from the collision, Kyungsoo heedlessly sits up and fixes himself into the same position the person opposite him is in.

“I didn't watch where I was going,” Kyungsoo says, helping the stranger gather the stuff back into the box.

“I-It's okay. I wasn't paying much attention to the road either, but I can handle this on my own,” the mop of rainbow hair—the stranger—says, head still faced down and hands moving tirelessly in a pace that made him look like he absolutely didn't want anybody to see what he was collecting from the ground and putting back into his box.
However, after finally getting back to his senses, Kyungsoo decides to inspect the material in his hand. He recognizes the feeling of plastic and flimsy packaging as he flips the object around on his palm. It's a piece of black clothing, he concludes, and he instinctively reads text as soon as his eyes spot them on the object. Two words and Kyungsoo's eyebrows shoot up in realization: Calvin Klein.

“Thank you so much for helping me!” the stranger says, snatching the underwear away from Kyungsoo and standing up. He offers Kyungsoo a hand, which Kyungsoo gapes at in confusion.
“The box you're holding,” Kyungsoo starts, bending his torso down slightly to pat away the dust that gathered around his knee, and upon standing straight back up, he catches a glimpse of the contents of the stranger's box. “It looks... heavy enough,” he continues.

“Okay.” The stranger nods, a faint shade of pink dusting his cheeks. “Thanks.”

The stranger keeps his head dipped down, but Kyungsoo sees enough of the stranger's face to believe that the stranger is younger than him and definitely not at the age he expects one to be obsessing over men's underwear. Kyungsoo thinks this meeting probably scores a new place in his ever-growing list of 'awkward encounters', one he started keeping track of ever since he met Byun Baekhyun during high school.

Kyungsoo fakes a glance at his wristwatch before saying, in the most panicked voice he can muster, because this is the only reliable escape he knows for awkward situations, “I have to go.”

It works, as Kyungsoo expected, and he smiles in triumph as the stranger moves to walk away after nodding at him one last time.

Kyungsoo watches the stranger disappear into the building next to pastry shop before going his own way towards the library. He makes a mental note of telling Baekhyun that people who hoard different varieties of men's underwear, to his dismay, do exist.

***

“I'm really sorry, hyung!” Kyungsoo bends himself into two in front of Junmyeon, his hand clenching around the strap of his messenger bag. He steals a look at his wristwatch, lips pressing into a thin line as he reads the numbers displayed on its screen. “I got held up at the studio again and I bumped into some underwear fanatic—”

“Like I told you already, Kyungsoo. It's okay.” Junmyeon lets out a sigh.

It's not the first time Kyungsoo came late for his part-time job at the library and it's certainly not a good mark on his performance record, considering that Junmyeon only gave him this job after days of begging and digging up evidence to prove that he is indeed a hungered college student—which is exactly why Kyungsoo is letting himself bow a little over sixty degrees in front of Junmyeon.

Junmyeon coaxes Kyungsoo to stand up, his lips slowly curving into a frantic smile upon noticing the amount of attention they're garnering from the passersby. “Look, I'm actually glad you came even if it was on a moment's notice,” he adds, and his shoulders visibly slack once Kyungsoo finally straightens himself.

Despite the algid weather, a sense of humidity still lingers in the atmosphere around the library's main entrance. Kyungsoo thinks it must be the warm air coming from the heaters inside the building and out of the vents. He uses the back of his hand to wipe at the sheen of cold sweat on his forehead. “I promise it won't happen again.”

“I'd probably still forgive you if it happens again, though. You've been having it quite hard these days, after all. You're on your last year at university, right?” Junmyeon says, a knowing smile painting his face.

Junmyeon is fixing the collar of his coat when Kyungsoo nods, forced to dwell on what good he must have done in his past lives to merit him a boss like Junmyeon.

“Well, I still have a train to catch, Kyungsoo. Let's talk later. Baekhyun is filling up for you inside.”

“Okay. Thanks, hyung.”

“Oh, and by the way, we're expecting a package of new books. It should arrive tonight. Pick it up for me, will you?”

“Of course.”

Kyungsoo waits until Junmyeon crosses the opposite road and disappears from his view before he turns and steps inside the library. He lets himself adjust to the sudden shift in temperature before continuing further inside.

The inside of the establishment was more traditional compared to the its exterior, which, according to Kyungsoo, looked like the abominable fruit of an architect's madness translated through the combination of Greek and Modern architecture; the interior, Kyungsoo thinks as he marvels at the way the ceiling lights bask the surroundings under rustic lighting, was what every library should be. Acting as if today was his first time at the library again, Kyungsoo continues to look around.

The first thing he spots aside from the multiple stacks of books left haphazardly on previously occupied tables is Baekhyun at the front desk, and he mentally winces at how Baekhyun has his feet placed on top of the mahogany.

“Get your filthy shoes off the desk,” Kyungsoo says as soon as he arrives at the front desk. He shoos Baekhyun away from his seat, bending his torso down slightly to sets his messenger bag beside the swivel chair. He waits until Baekhyun appears across him before continuing, voice unintentionally coming out as a dejected sigh, “What are you doing here, Baekhyun?”

Baekhyun lets out a scandalous gasp, one that makes it seem like Kyungsoo just offended his ancestors. “Okay, first of all, good afternoon to you too—that's how you politely greet someone, by the way—and second of all, don't I at least deserve a thank you for filling in and saving your late ?” Baekhyun pouts, cutely, which Kyungsoo assumes is what his friend is aiming for.

Kyungsoo considers letting Baekhyun know that having both hands placed on the waist while giving out a rebuttal makes anyone look more of a y prima donna than a kicked puppy, but he figures that Baekhyun fits the former role better, so he decides against it.

“Didn't I tell you not to come here?” Kyungsoo crosses his arms as he averts his gaze away from Baekhyun. From his place at the front desk, he can easily keep track of the people going in and out of the building. A group of what he perceives to be as college students enters the library in quiet murmurs, and Kyungsoo is then reminded of the mess he still has to clean up. “Do I have to send you a card or something?”

“You know, I think that might actually work...” Baekhyun begins, elbows folding to lean against the desk and let his chin rest on top of his intertwined fingers, “But I don't think Hallmark sells 'I'm sorry for being a misanthropic librarian who won't let his best friend borrow material for his college project' cards.”

Kyungsoo rolls his eyes, a personal reaction he'd developed solely for Baekhyun's antics. “You forgot to mention that the material you want to borrow belongs to the restricted section.”

“But—”

“No.”

“Kyungsoo—”

“Baekhyun.” Kyungsoo squeezes his eyes shut in exasperation. He really needs to remind Baekhyun that he's in the library to work and therefore should be free from having to indulge in useless banters he already gets enough of at their shared apartment. He takes in a deep breath, determined to get the message through Baekhyun's seemingly impervious skull this time. “For the nth time, I can't. It's against the policies.”

“Please! I'll treat you to dinner!” Baekhyun raises his voice, and Kyungsoo almost puts his hand down on the bell at the far end of the table in reflex.

Kyungsoo doesn't even need to look around to confirm that people are throwing looks at them at the moment, and he shoots Baekhyun a glare.

Baekhyun appears to have gotten the gist as he continues in a whisper, “I'll even help you with your photography class project.”

“Like I said—”

“Please.”

Dropping his head low with a sigh, Kyungsoo reaches for the key to the restricted section from one of the desk's drawers. He's doing it just to get it over with, just to get rid of Byun Baekhyun for the day and absolutely not because he needs help for his photography class project which he doesn't have any idea how to start let alone finish, Kyungsoo forces himself to think. He almost takes his decision back upon seeing Baekhyun's pleased face, but the key gets taken away from him before he even gets the chance to change his mind.

Baekhyun hums a 'thank you', to which Kyungsoo replies with pointing a finger towards the now empty part of the library.

“Hurry up and go, and don't make a mess. Also, clear those tables for me before you do,” he says.

“Okay. I will.” Baekhyun pouts again, putting the key inside his front pocket before turning and walking away from Kyungsoo. “Geez, why do you sound so eager to get rid of me?”

Kyungsoo doesn't bother answering Baekhyun and instead lets himself sink listlessly in his seat. He blindly reaches for the camera inside his messenger bag, willing himself to think about his photography class project instead of the real reason why he didn't want Baekhyun around during his working hours at the library. After a moment of wrestling with his own thoughts, Kyungsoo abandons his camera and sinks back in his seat, hands coming up to cover his eyes as he lets out a distressed groan. He really needed Baekhyun to rush and leave the library as soon as possible.

It isn't because he hates Baekhyun. Sure, Baekhyun can be annoying at times with his constant inability to know when to talk and when to shut his mouth, but to be fair, Baekhyun was just fuel to the real problem which was—Kyungsoo forces himself not to think, but fails—Her. Kyungsoo groans even louder.

In Kyungsoo's own projection of possible events, allowing Baekhyun to meet Her meant giving Baekhyun more things to about. Therefore it should, by all means, be prevented from ever happening for the sake of his reputation, for the sake of the little silence he gets in his life, for—

“—Kyungsoo ssi?”

Kyungsoo blinks. The voice sounds eerily familiar to him, and he bites into his bottom lip to keep himself from cursing his nonexistent luck as he looks up to face the owner of the voice.

“I'd like to return these,” the girl—Mizuhara Kiko, as Kyungsoo remembers having read from her library card—in front of him says as she places a short stack of books onto the table. Kiko then separates the stack of books into two equal stacks, smiling as she pushes them towards Kyungsoo. “And also, I'd like to borrow these. You recommend them, right?”

“Uh...” Kyungsoo starts, and it takes him a lot of effort to remember that Junmyeon had indeed required him to make a list of books he recommends and that copies of the list were taped on the first shelves of the west and east wing of the library. “Yes,” He nods, immediately regretting how he sounded too enthusiastic for his liking.

“Great! I think I'll definitely enjoy reading them as always,” Kiko says as she brings up a hand to tuck the clumps of hair that had started covering the sides of her face back behind her ears. “After all, it's you who recommend them.”

“Aha, yes.” Kyungsoo lets out a taut smile. He brings out a pen and the stamp set from inside the desk drawer, determined to do this job as quickly as humanly possible. He manages to work swiftly through everything under five minutes, handing Kiko the two books she wants to borrow with a grin.

“Don't forget to return them after three working days,” Kyungsoo says, to which Kiko responds with a short 'got it'. Kyungsoo watches her greet and exit the library with a pink-haired man who appears to have waited for her from the doorway.

“Well, that was interesting.” Baekhyun shows up back at the front desk with his own stack of books. “I don't think I've ever seen you turn as red as you are right now, Kyungsoo.”

“ off,” Kyungsoo snaps, bracing himself for the onslaught of teasing he feels will come from Baekhyun anytime soon. He steals a look from the reflective surface of the silver nameplate on the desk and glowers at Baekhyun after confirming that he wasn't blushing. “I'm not red.”

“You are to me.” Baekhyun sniggers as he pushes his stack of books towards Kyungsoo.

Kyungsoo stamps Baekhyun's library card as if he was using a hammer and was pounding it onto Baekhyun's head. “What the does that even mean?”

“Forget that. Show me today's note,” Baekhyun says, and even before Kyungsoo could pin down what his friend meant, Baekhyun had already grabbed the two books Kiko returned away from the desk.

Kyungsoo struggles to get the books away from Baekhyun, but the desk between them and Baekhyun's hand over his face makes it hard for him to do so. He begins to really panic when Baekhyun starts scanning through the pages of the books with his free hand.

Soon enough, a piece of neon-colored paper falls from one of the books. It's a bright yellow this time, Kyungsoo notes and he realizes that despite the fact that Kiko borrows two books every time, he only ever finds notes from the novels she borrows and never the textbooks.

“Found it!” Baekhyun exclaims too loudly for a library, but Kyungsoo's too occupied with the image of his world crumbling before his eyes to scold Baekhyun for being noisy.

Part of this may have been his fault, Kyungsoo thinks. He shouldn't have told Baekhyun about how he's been receiving notes from a regular visitor at the library, even if it was during their occasional truth-or-lose-money game sessions. It only happened because Kyungsoo had really become a bit bothered with his situation with Kiko and also because it was his lunch money that was at stake, but he figures that it's too late to be regretful now as Baekhyun reads through the note.

“Wow... I think she's whipped,” Baekhyun says as he hands Kyungsoo the note. “I mean, look at that. It's like reading something from a modern-woman incarnation of Shakespeare.”

“She's not,” Kyungsoo scoffs before reading:

“I am no scientist, nor was I good at tenth grade Physics,
but I'm pretty sure that gravity has nothing to do
with how I feel as if I had been pulled by an intangible force
and am now sent free-falling towards you.”

Thank you for this lovely read. I really enjoyed it.

- K.

“How long has this been going, again?” Baekhyun questions as soon as Kyungsoo moves to put the note together with the older ones, which Kyungsoo hid inside a personal box Junmyeon let him keep inside the drawer. Although Kyungsoo doesn't really feel comfortable with the whole situation, he isn't heartless enough to throw Kiko's notes away.

“For about a month and a half now, but she only does it whenever she checks out a novel, which is six times counting today,” Kyungsoo says, eyes focusing at anything but Baekhyun's face.

Baekhyun tips his head to the side and looks at Kyungsoo straight in the eyes. It's the look Baekhyun wears whenever he's planning something. “Why not try and date her?” he says, lips curling up in thought. “I mean, it's been quite long hasn't it? And she seems like a very nice girl.”

“Baekhyun.” Kyungsoo puts a hand over his own nape, his fingers raking through the hair just above it. He really dislikes talking to Baekhyun about things that involved love and relationships.

“Okay. I'm sorry. I understand that you can't just date anyone and therefore have committed yourself to growing old alone and dying as a dignified ,” Baekhyun mock-pouts. Luckily, he's fast enough to dodge Kyungsoo's threatening hands. “Hey! I was just kidding! Here, stamp these books for me already. I feel like I'm overstaying.”

Kyungsoo does as what he's told, but he can't help but feel the slight pang of uneasiness that's bubbling in his stomach. It wasn't that Kiko wasn't good enough for him. He just really doesn't feel like dating anyone at the moment. What if Kiko really felt something for him? Would he have to reject her and see her dejected face? Kyungsoo shakes the thought away; he concludes that it's careless to assume that Kiko does have feelings for him just because she leaves him 'thank you' notes.

Kyungsoo stops at the fourth book. “Maximum of three books, Baekhyun.”

“Oh come on, Kyungsoo! That one's not even a book! It's a magazine!”

“From the restricted section,” Kyungsoo teases, but he lets Baekhyun borrow it anyway.

Just as Baekhyun motions to leave, Kyungsoo yanks him back by the hem of his shirt.

“Before I forget, here,” Kyungsoo says, handing Baekhyun a one thousand Won bill. He watches Baekhyun an eyebrow in question. “I bumped into someone who hoards men's underwear earlier.”

It's another one of their betting games, wherein they each make a list of weird things they think are real and get money for each item proved right, and so far, Baekhyun has been winning the most.

Baekhyun grins as he takes the money from Kyungsoo. “Told you they exist.”

***

Kyungsoo wakes up to the sound of his phone vibrating against the wooden surface of his study table.

He blindly reaches for the device, fingers automatically pressing the 'snooze' button and setting the alarm off. His necks feels stiff, and it's only when he registers the feeling of a mouse pad pressed against his cheek that he realizes he'd accidentally fallen asleep on his study table while editing and finalizing the photos he took from the studio yesterday.

Sitting up, Kyungsoo peeks at the digital clock he keeps on the edge of his study table and curses himself for forgetting to disable the alarm yesterday as soon as he sees that it's a Saturday. His room is cold and dim despite the fact that his clock says it's already half-past noon, and the crisp air coming from his wall fan just makes him want to fall back into sleep on his bed and under the duvets, but he decides against it; he should get up, Kyungsoo tells himself because even though it's a weekend, he still has a lot of stuff to do.

He does a few stretches in an attempt to alleviate the budding discomfort he feels in his neck and lower back as he moves to check his phone. He scrolls to through a list of unread messages and deletes the unimportant ones before opening and answering the series of messages he received from his co-worker at the photo agency, Park Chanyeol:

(Received 12:03PM) hey kyungsoo are u free tomorrow?

(Received 12:05PM) it's my niece's birthday party and we
need a photographer. I can do it, but my sister would rather have me
handle the guests. Will u be willing to do it? My sister will pay. of course.

(Received 12:08PM) it'll be @ my parent's restaurant at 1-5pm. u still
know how to get there, right?? u can also bring Baekhyun along if u want.

(Received 12:13PM) Please tell me if u can or can't. I need your response asap.
Thanks.

Kyungsoo does a short projection of his schedule inside his head, along with the things he still needs to do. He types a reply, and it doesn't take a while for his phone to vibrate again in his hand.

(Delivered 1:39PM) Hey... sorry for the late reply, Chanyeol. And also... I would really
like to, but I don't think I can be there tomorrow. I need to work on stuff from the
photo agency and university. Sorry.

 

(Received 1:42PM) ahw... I understand. It's okay, Kyungsoo. Thanks for responding.

Kyungsoo thumbs the screen of his phone before setting it down on his study table. At this time of the day, taking a shower would be the best way to wake himself up, and he grabs a change of clothes from the pile of the ones he'd already washed and dried but left forgotten in the laundry basket. He makes a mental note of folding and putting them inside his closet later.

Just as he was about to open the door and step out of his bedroom, his phone decides to ring.

“Hello?” Kyungsoo greets, uncertainty clear in his voice upon learning that it was a call from Minseok, his and Chanyeol's current superior at the photo agency they currently work for.

“Hi. It's Minseok. I'm speaking to Kyungsoo, right?”

Kyungsoo looks at his digital clock again to confirm that it was indeed a Saturday, his day off, and that something like missing work or being late was not an applicable reason for Minseok to be calling him today. He's not sure if he should be happy about that, though. His other co-workers had said that Minseok only calls whenever he has something important to tell, and if that's true, Kyungsoo has no idea what Minseok needs to tell him. He clears his throat. “Yes, this is Kyungsoo. Is there something wrong, hyung?”

“Not exactly, but are you okay, Kyungsoo?” Minseok squeaks.

The hesitation in Minseok's voice makes Kyungsoo need to take a seat on the edge of his bed. “Yes, I'm fine, hyung. Why?”

“Well... how should I put this. I'd really rather tell you this in person but...” Minseok trails. “The client you worked with last week... they're a bit dissatisfied with how the photos came out.”

Kyungsoo squeezes his eyes shut, letting himself fall back and hit the bed as he groans. He wants to say that it was expected. The client he had last week had him take photos of people for a self-published magazine, and Kyungsoo admits that he isn't really that good with photographing people. He specializes in landscape photography, an information he placed on his application form, but Minseok is good enough to let him do other jobs. Requests for landscape photography were scarce and Minseok knew Kyungsoo really needs the money.

“I'm really sorry, hyung. I did what they wanted—”

“Don't be too hard on yourself, Kyungsoo. Boss just wanted me to let you know,” Minseok sighs before continuing, “I saw the pictures and they honestly weren't bad. Guess your client was just really picky.”

Kyungsoo stares at the ceiling before him, eyes tracing the cracks and stains on its surface. “I doubt that, hyung.”

“But we can't do anything about it anymore, you know. The job's been done.”

“Yeah... I guess so.”

There's a slight pause before Minseok answers,“Well, I'll make sure to search for landscape requests and give them all to you, so you'd better be ready,” he says, letting out a small laugh. “Oh, and Kyungsoo? If you're finished with the photos from yesterday—”

“I just finished editing them, hyung. I'll make sure have them emailed to you later.”

“Great! Thanks,” Minseok says.

The call ends with a beep from the other line.

Kyungsoo rolls in his bed until he lands flat on his belly with his phone still clutched in his hand. Even though Minseok promised to find him requests suited for what he does best, Kyungsoo thinks he won't be getting job offerings anytime soon. It would be a problem, Kyungsoo admits. He and Baekhyun barely make it through all the bills with their set of part-time jobs, and Kyungsoo earning even just a bit lesser than how he usually does meant that he'd be letting Baekhyun pay more of their shared bills.

The idea of burdening Baekhyun even just by a tiny bit doesn't sit right with Kyungsoo, especially since he was the one who came knocking on Baekhyun's door in the first place and had asked Baekhyun to let him share the apartment unit.

Kyungsoo decides to put his photography class project on hold as he composes a new message and sends it to Chanyeol.

(Delivered 2:03PM) Chanyeol, on second thought, I'll be there.

***

Kyungsoo arrives just in time for the birthday party with a very annoyed Baekhyun in tow.

“If you're going to act like a jealous aunt at a child's birthday party, I'm leaving you,” Kyungsoo says. He doesn't know why Baekhyun's mood suddenly changed, but he suspects it has something to do with him informing Baekhyun that Park Chanyeol will be there.

A bell announces their arrival as he and Baekhyun step inside the Park Family's restaurant, causing the people to look at their way.

“Oh, Kyungsoo! I'm really glad you came!” Mama Park exclaims. She rushes to give Kyungsoo a stifling hug. “And this is?”

“Ah, it's Baekhyun, my friend,” Kyungsoo says while gesturing at the other.

Baekhyun proffers a hand, which Mama Park eagerly takes. “Lovely meeting you, Mrs. Park.”

“Oh if it isn't Baekhyun! I've heard a lot about you from Chanyeol. I've glad you came!” Mama Park says and Kyungsoo watches the mild shock on Baekhyun's face. “Well, the party is outside but we'll be eating here. You lads can go now. Everyone's outside already.”

“Thanks,” Baekhyun and Kyungsoo say in unison.

The inside looks the same, Kyungsoo observes, except for the myriad of balloons by the back door and the way the tables are obviously arranged for the guests. Kyungsoo inspects the bag of freebies placed on each seat.

“It's a Sofia the First themed birthday party,” Baekhyun gasps, almost too incredulously with one hand over his mouth and an index finger pointed at the purple bag of freebies on the dining seats. “Okay, I think I'm going to enjoy this. Have fun, photographer Kyungsoo.”

Kyungsoo gets a hard clap on the back from Baekhyun, and he gives the other a kick on the shin as they move towards the restaurant's backyard.

The weather today is just perfect for an outdoor event despite the fact that it had been raining for the past few days, and Kyungsoo almost scolds himself for wearing a black sweater underneath his military-green jacket.

Kyungsoo starts taking pictures of the venue first. There's a makeshift stage adorned with flowers and party designs with the colors purple and yellow. He lets his camera take multiple shots of the birthday banner and the five-tiered cake situated at the center of the stage.

The party, according to the invitation card, was just about to start, but the place was already teeming with a lot of people ranging from mothers and their children and to family friends. The sound system beside the makeshift stage starts playing Maroon 5's 'Sugar', and Kyungsoo brings his camera out as the people start to gather and have fun on the dance floor.

“Kyungsoo-ssi?” Kyungsoo feels a light tap on his shoulder. He turns around, and he almost drops his camera as he sees Kiko behind him together with a man and a little girl. “I can't believe you're here at little Yura's birthday party too!”

“Ah, Kiko. Hello.” Kyungsoo lets his camera hang around his neck and against his chest, and he thanks Baekhyun for choosing to enjoy himself around the party and for not tagging along. Kyungsoo really didn't have the best luck, but he admits that he was still lucky at times. “I'm actually here to photograph the party. How about you?”

“Oh, really? I didn't know you were also a photographer!” Kiko exclaims.

Kyungsoo hears the little girl beside the pink-haired man in front of him sulk. The little girl starts tugging at the man's jeans and Kyungsoo almost wants to take a picture as the man bends down to pat the little girl on the head. “Rahee, I promise you we'll play with the other kids. Just wait a bit. Your mother is talking to somebody.”

“Ah, that's my brother, Kim Jongin. We came here since little Yura is my little Rahee's best friend,” Kiko says, and it's only then that Kyungsoo realizes that the man—Jongin—is the same as the man who always came to pick Kiko up at the library.

“Jongin, this is Do Kyungsoo. He's the librarian who recommends me good books.”

Kyungsoo isn't exactly sure, but he thinks he spots a light shade of pink dusting Jongin's cheeks. He disregards the thought as soon as Jongin nods and looks at him; the guy doesn't look like the shy type, so Kyungsoo thinks it might have just been his hair reflecting color on his cheeks. Kyungsoo wonders if bold hair colors are considered the current trend as he remembers the rainbow-haired-men's-underwear-collector he'd bumped into the other day.

Jongin offers a hand towards Kyungsoo's direction. “Nice to meet you. You recommend really good reads.”

“Same here,” Kyungsoo takes Jongin's hand in his, and he doesn't know why but he thinks Jongin's hand is very warm. “I'm glad you approve of my taste in books. Want me to take a picture of you guys?”

“Yes please!” Kiko says as she positions herself next to Jongin. She brings Rahee up and carries her so that they were at eye-level.

After that, Kyungsoo moves around the place and takes photos of anything he deemed worthy to be in film while also making sure to follow the birthday girl and the Park Family around throughout the whole party. He was determined to take good pictures of the event because even if he preferred photographing things and places over people, Kyungsoo liked jobs where he gets to take pictures of a person's important event in life the best. He thinks that it really brings out the true purpose of a photographer, which to him was to capture moments in film.

He almost doesn't realize that the party was already closing to its end if it weren't for Chanyeol who grabs him by the shoulder and says, “I haven't seen you put that thing down ever since you arrived.”

Chanyeol turns Kyungsoo around by the shoulders. “You should at least eat and have fun, you know. It's a party after all.”

“I'm fine, Chanyeol. Besides, I'm not hungry,” Kyungsoo says.

“If this is about making you up for the job you did with the client last week, then I'm just going to say you don't have to. Like what Minseok hyung said that client was probably just too picky—”

“It has nothing to do with that, Chanyeol.” Kyungsoo coaxes Chanyeol's hands off his shoulders. “I'm just doing my job.”

“Well, as the person who hired you, I'm saying that your job's done. Go eat,” Chanyeol says as he pushes Kyungsoo inside the family restaurant.

Kyungsoo is then greeted by a number of already emptied round tables. There are only a few people left inside the building. A group of mothers have decided to occupy a table and gossip as their children play tag at the dining area while the small number of remaining fathers chose to drink at a table far from the mother's.

Kyungsoo spots Baekhyun talking and sharing a table with Kiko and Chanyeol, and Kyungsoo thinks that Baekhyun must have had a little too much to drink judging from how his face was already red and from how he looked like he didn't care that he was a grown man wearing a Disney princess party hat.

Putting the problem of how he's going to haul a tipsy Baekhyun home for later, Kyungsoo makes his way to the buffet tables. He finds a place just a few steps away from the buffet tables and he thinks about setting his camera down for a moment while he gets food. His neck had become stiff from carrying his camera's weight all day, but Kyungsoo decides that it would be too risky to leave it unguarded on the table, specially with the kids still playing tag in the dining area.

But Kyungsoo does the opposite upon seeing one of the restaurant's staff carry a stack of dirty plates that looked too heavy for one person to carry alone towards the kitchen. He rushes to help the staff, and his eyes go wide as he hears a voice shout 'Rahee!' followed by a crash, a scream, and the sound of breaking glass.

Kyungsoo looks at his hands and frowns. Where did he hear the sound of breaking glass if he and the staff still had the stacks of plates in their hands? Kyungsoo helps the staff set the plates down on a vacant table before turning to look at the source of the sound.

“Rahee, are you okay? You shouldn't have ran around the dining area!” Kyungsoo finds Jongin tending to a crying little girl, but his eyes dart and focus more at the sight of his camera on the floor.

“Oh !” Kyungsoo exclaims in horror as he picks his camera up from the floor. From what his mind can process, it seems that while running around, Rahee and the other kids accidentally collided with the table where Kyungsoo placed his camera down and had sent it to topple and fall over. “, it's broken,” Kyungsoo says while looking at his camera's cracked lenses.

“Is that your camera?” Kyungsoo hears Jongin ask, but he's too shocked to give a response.

“Ah, Kyungsoo-ssi! Oh my god, I'm really sorry!” Kiko comes to grab Rahee. By now, Kyungsoo knows that everyone's attention was pinned on them. “I should have really looked out for Rahee more as they played!”

Kyungsoo stands up and dusts himself. “N-No... it's okay. I shouldn't have left it at the table in the first place,” he says, trying to put the situation at ease.

Just then, Baekhyun decides to in together with Chanyeol. “Hey Kyungsoo, didn't it take you half a year to save up for that camera?” Baekhyun drunkenly says with his arm latched around Chanyeol's slumped shoulders.

Chanyeol is obviously trying hard to match Baekhyun's height, and Kyungsoo is left to wonder if the two really hated each other with the way they were acting at the moment. “Yeah. You even had to borrow my old one as you saved up for your own,” Chanyeol croaks, and Kyungsoo just wishes he hadn't accepted this job in the first place.

Suddenly, Jongin walks up to him and says, “Let me pay for it.”

Kiko quickly moves to stop him. “Jongin you—”

“Noona, I was the one watching Rahee at that moment when the accident happened.”

Kyungsoo shakes his head as he tries to turn the camera on. He sighs in relief as the screen lights up, but frowns when it goes off again. “You... don't really need to. It was an accident after all, and I think it's just the lenses that got broken. I can have the camera fixed at a repair shop.”

“Those still cost a lot right?” Jongin persuades, and Kyungsoo can't say no. As much as he didn't want anyone to pay for what happened, his camera was his largest source of income and he needed it for his class photography project.

“Yeah...” he hesitantly says.

“Great. That really makes me feel less guilty,” Jongin says, “Just give me a bit of time to scrap the funds and I'll make sure to pay you.”

“But Kyungsoo needs his camera as soon as possible for his photography class project,” Baekhyun butts in yet again, soon followed by an amused Chanyeol.

“And Kyungsoo's job also depends on him having a camera.”

Kyungsoo represses the urge to beat Chanyeol and Baekhyun.

“I'll... I'll think of something.” Jongin's eyes dart around the room as if the answer was just somewhere near for him to find. He looks genuinely worried, and it makes Kyungsoo really want to just lift the burden off of his shoulders.

“Jongin-ssi, you really don't have to—”

“I have an idea, but I still have to make sure if it'll work,”Jongin cuts him off. “For now, just give me a way to contact you, Kyungsoo-ssi. And please don't say no. I'll be left feeling really bad if you won't let me do this,” he says.

Dropping his shoulders in defeat, Kyungsoo gives Kim Jongin his phone number.

***

Exactly how Kim Jongin was going to help him, Kyungsoo finds out the next day.

He finds himself staring up and waiting for any sign of Jongin's presence at an empty flight of stairs which belonged to the building beside the newly-opened pastry shop near the library. Jongin had told him through text that he worked there at the building and had also asked if it were okay to meet somewhere near, to which Kyungsoo replied with saying that the library he worked for was just a few blocks away and that he could certainly meet Jongin at his working place.

Kyungsoo puts both his hands inside his jacket's front pocket as he begins to think of a way to pass time, and it only takes a while before he starts wondering about what Jongin worked as. If what he recalls is correct, upstairs is where a big studio is supposed to be located. It's the one Minseok had offered for him to check out, which he never did after finding out that it was a fashion magazine studio. Maybe Jongin worked as a photographer too or maybe even as a fashion magazine editor.

“I'll see you later, Sehun. I have to meet someone.”

“Yeah. Take care.”

Kyungsoo hears voices echoing from upstairs followed by the sound of approaching footsteps. Soon enough, he sees Jongin climbing down the stairs with a camera in hand.

“Kyungsoo-ssi,” Jongin waves in a greeting before using the hand to rake through his hair. The gesture, albeit shortly-lived, makes Kyungsoo take notice of how Jongin's hair looks different than how it did yesterday. Compared to yesterday, Jongin's hair today looks softer, as if it had just been brushed thoroughly by a comb, and it's styled in a way that let his fringe fall and slightly curl just above his eyebrows.

Kyungsoo thinks if it would be okay to run his fingers through Jongin's hair just to see if it's as soft as the cotton candy it reminds him of.

“I managed to have a friend lend you his DSLR camera,” Jongin says upon stopping in front of Kyungsoo. He brings up the camera in his hand for the other to see.

Kyungsoo inspects the device. He starts to feel a little worried after reading the device's unit name which was imprinted near its shutter button. It's a Nikon D5300, an entry-level DSLR camera that was older to the market but more expensive compared to Kyungsoo's Nikon D3300.

“Jongin-ssi... I think... I'd rather wait for my camera to be fixed...”

“Why?” Jongin asks, his eyebrows furrowing. “You need to start on your photography class project as soon as possible, right?”

“Yeah, but, is it really okay?”

“My friend, Jongdae, is okay with it. He's a photographer at the studio and this is his old camera. He says he'd rather let somebody use it than let it rot in his storage,” Jongin reassures Kyungsoo, and it works as it makes Kyungsoo accept and take the device in his hands.

“Thanks, Jongin-ssi. I'll make sure to take really good care of it.”

“Shall we go then?”

They walk aimlessly around the city with Kyungsoo leading the way. The help, he learns, although convenient, comes with a small price. Jongin told him that Jongdae had asked for him to make sure Kyungsoo takes good care of the camera while using it, which in Jongin's language meant that he had to follow Kyungsoo wherever as long as Kyungsoo had the camera with him. Kyungsoo doesn't mind it much and just lets Jongin do what he needed to do; he figures that it's probably better to have someone to talk to while he works on his project.

Kyungsoo turns the camera on as soon as they arrive at the local park which was almost empty save for a couple of joggers and the occasional people who strolled the park with their dogs on leashes. He likes it here. Despite having practically grown up within the immaterial boundaries of the city, Kyungsoo had always found the place too bright and overwhelming. He loved the tall skyscrapers and the liveliness that the city brought, but he didn't like how the bright lights and the constant rush seem to have made people forget to stop and admire their surroundings.

“So, what kind of project are we working on?” Jongin asks after a long moment of welcomed silence.

Kyungsoo smiles wryly at how Jongin referred to it as their project. He takes a photo of the pond in front of them before answering, “I'm given about three months to compose a journal filled with photos complete with captions.”

Jongin purses his lips in thought. “Seems easy enough.”

“Yeah, until you get to the part where you actually have to work on it.”

Jongin smiles at this, and he moves an inch closer to Kyungsoo, just enough to peek at the preview of the photo Kyungsoo had just taken. “Well, do you have any bright ideas?”

Kyungsoo puts the camera down to stare at the grass beneath his feet. “I'm not sure... I mean, some of my colleagues are working on it by having just one theme.”

“Then, why not do the same?”

“I don't know. The idea doesn't really appeal to me. Wouldn't a journal filled with photos of only one theme or only one color scheme be boring?”

“It does sound boring, but in the end, doesn't it all boil down to the content?” Jongin says, and Kyungsoo thinks that it's the first time he's really seen Jongin so close as he nods in agreement.

Basked under the sunlight, Kyungsoo gets to see the prominence of Jongin's tanned skin and how it mixes in with harmony with the pink of his hair and the brown of his irises. It's really only then that Kyungsoo takes full notice of how Jongin looked really good with his white shirt and ripped skinny jeans, and if Kyungsoo had to guess what the other worked as, he thinks Jongin would have to be a model.

“How about taking picture of things you like? Personal experiences?” Jongin suggests, waggling his eyebrows, and Kyungsoo lets himself smile unabashedly at the gesture. “Your professor said your journal could be about anything. Then why not give him the randomness he's asking for?”

Kyungsoo spends the rest of the day doing just as what Jongin suggested. He takes pictures of what he does best. The monuments around the park, the sky, the trees, birds, flowers, and even rocks. He tries taking pictures of people and also of Jongin, but he immediately deletes them after giving them a quick once-over.

By the time the sun starts setting and painting broken red and orange ripples on the park's pond, Kyungsoo already had five photos he wanted to put in his journal. He takes one last picture of the pond before calling it a day.

“What you said really worked for me. Thanks, Jongin-ssi.” Kyungsoo hands the camera back to Jongin. “I'm sorry if you got bored or anything. Maybe I could talk to Jongdae—”

“You don't have to. I found today fun. Therapeutic, even. I'd be willing to this again next time, Kyungsoo-ssi,” Jongin says.

“Really? That would be great!” Kyungsoo sounds too excited but he thinks having Jongin around earlier really boosted his motivation. He fumbles for the right words to say in an attempt to invite Jongin next time, even if he really didn't have to since this was, in the first place, part of Jongin's payment for breaking his camera. “I'll make sure to find a better place next time!”

They go their separate ways with a promise to meet up every time they get a chance, which due to work and university, was usually only on weekends and rarely on weekdays.

Kyungsoo asks Jongin to drop the formal honorific and call him hyung instead on their second meeting, which Jongin counters with excessively widened eyes and a 'wait, you're really older than me?'.

They have their third meeting at the local museum, and Kyungsoo has to point daggers at Jongin for every time the younger laughed or raised his voice higher than the minimum, which meant a whisper in Kyungsoo's language.

“Keep your voice low, Jongin,” Kyungsoo says.

They peruse through the exhibits inside the establishment, and Kyungsoo makes sure to take pictures of the artifacts he found appealing. Jongin entertains himself by acting like they were on a one-on-one tour around the museum as he pointed out which dynasty each artifact came from, complete with a little back story if there was any. Jongin was clearly the tour guide in this one-on-one tour, and Kyungsoo thinks it's unfair how that automatically gave Jongin an aura of wisdom. He fights the urge to fake a snore as Jongin drones on about to which rich family the golden necklace on the display in front of them belonged to.

It's only when Jongin does a slight pauses and stutters that Kyungsoo realizes Jongin had been reading the small texts engraved at the sides of the displays the whole time.

“Way to blow your cover, Mr. Tour guide,” Kyungsoo snorts, but if he were to be honest, he found the act a bit cute.

“Took you longer than I expected, hyung,” Jongin taunts, earning him an elbow to the stomach from Kyungsoo and another one just after he shrieks in pain. He looks up at Kyungsoo and finds that the last blow was because he was shrieking in pain and that Kyungsoo wanted him to be quiet.

Jongin straightens himself and gives Kyungsoo a childish pout. “You're really acting like a librarian, you know.”

“It's only because you're starting to act like Baekhyun and I don't really like the idea of having two Baekhyuns in my life.”

“At least I'd make a better looking Baekhyun, right?” Jongin says, and Kyungsoo leaves him for another artifact.

They slowly form a routine; Kyungsoo makes sure to leave as soon as his library shift ended on weekdays and also to keep his weekends free for his rendezvous with Jongin which they'd agree to hold twice a week. Their meetings soon morph into something that's more of a friendly get-together than Jongin's simple arrangement to pay for Kyungsoo's camera, and they make the most out of each day towards an unspoken but shared intent of getting to know more about each other.

Kyungsoo tells Jongin about how he was once one of his family's most prized possessions until he deviated from his parents' dreams of having an engineer for a son. He tells Jongin that he'd left home to pursue what he truly loved, which left him with no choice but to share an apartment with Baekhyun and juggle multiple jobs day in and day out just to earn enough for bills he was too young to be paying for as he studied at the university.

“I guess life's just like that. Sometimes it requires us to pay more for the things we really want,” Jongin tells Kyungsoo, and it makes Kyungsoo leave out the footnote about how he's become a bit unsure of the choice he made years ago.

With every meeting, Jongin becomes more like the books Kyungsoo had put in his recommendations, addictive and charming despite the frayed edges of their pages. To Kyungsoo, Jongin is the kind of open book one wouldn't want to put down and would intentionally read through the words slower just to be able to treasure the story in it longer. Kyungsoo reads through Jongin's story and learns a lot of things such as how Jongin likes dogs, reading novels, writing, dancing, taking care of Rahee, and almost everything good in the world except for coffee. He learns that Jongin does work as a model at a studio while also being a second year college student who majors in English Literature and minors in Theater Arts, and that Jongin lived alone in an apartment unit that had a room which served as a personal art studio for his older sister, Kiko.

Slowly, the fact that Minseok hadn't called for roughly a month fades into background noise for Kyungsoo. He'd come into good terms with picking up every job offering he gets from Chanyeol and his other friends. Even Kiko who still left constant notes inside the books she borrows bothers him less than it did before. It comes to a point where Baekhyun starts to suspect why Kyungsoo appears to become more lively during weekends. Kyungsoo just tells him that it's because he's been gaining a lot of progress with his photography class project.

“So what does someone who majors in Visual Arts do?” Jongin asks over a cup of milk chocolate one day.

Kyungsoo had chosen the pastry shop beside Jongin's working place for today's meeting, and he briefly doubts his choice as soon as he points his camera at his own cup of coffee and thinks about the people who do the same thing with the addition of posting photos of their food on social media. “A lot, but since I chose to focus on photography... as you can see, I take a lot of pictures,” Kyungsoo says.

“How about you? What does someone who majors in English Literature do?”

“You don't see me do it, but I read and write a lot.” Jongin smiles cheekily as he drinks from his cup. “And I also write poetry.”

“Isn't poetry just saying that one thing is like the other?” Kyungsoo mindlessly says, and he hears Jongin gasp.

Jongin looks ridiculously offended, one hand coming up to cover his open mouth. “You are...” he trails.

Kyungsoo puts an act of furrowing his brows just to tease Jongin.

“You're not exactly wrong, but you're not exactly right as well.”

“Really?” Kyungsoo continues teasing the younger, “I'd appreciate it if you could provide solid proof that poetry is not just about comparing things.”

Crossing his arms, Jongin leans on the table top and meets Kyungsoo's eyes. “Challenge accepted. I'll let you read this poem I'm currently working on, soon.”

It's only after the seventh week that Kyungsoo realizes Jongin had already paid 90% of the combined cost of new camera lenses and his camera's repair fee, which meant that his arrangements with Jongin were drawing to a close, but Kyungsoo forces himself not to dwell on the thought. It's not like Jongin will stop seeing him after all of this is over, right?

“I just noticed this, but you seem to avoid taking pictures of people, hyung,” Jongin says.

They're at the darkroom available for use at Kyungsoo's photo agency to process the pictures Kyungsoo took with an analog camera in one of their previous meetings and which he decided he'd like to appear as black and white photographs.

“It's not like I avoid them... I just... I don't think I'm good at them,” Kyungsoo says and he's glad with the way the red lighting inside the room paints shadows on his face and that Jongin was at the other side of the room, making it a bit difficult for the younger to distinguish the look he has on his face. “I'm not good with people,” Kyungsoo emphasizes.

“And who told you that?” Jongin says.

“Nobody. The pictures I take of people just really don't satisfy me.”

Kyungsoo hears the way Jongin lets out sigh, followed by the jutting sound of clinking metal and approaching footsteps. He tries his best not to look up, tries to ignore the sudden tension he feels slowly building up inside the room, but the shadow that falls onto his workplace makes it hard for Kyungsoo to do so and ignore Jongin.

Kyungsoo looks up, and his eyes fall onto the slope above Jongin's upper lip. He feels his stomach perform a somersault as Jongin moves closer towards him. It was almost as if Jongin wanted to close the distance between them, continuing to move closer and give Kyungsoo no choice but to step backwards, and Kyungsoo's breathing hitches when he feels his back hit cement.

Just then, Jongin pauses in his steps. Jongin's face is almost only a hair's breadth away from his own, Kyungsoo estimates, and he thinks he would've come in contact with Jongin's skin if it weren't for their height difference.

“Why not try again but with me as your model?”

The way Jongin says the sentence makes the hair on Kyungsoo's nape stand. They're too close for comfort and all Kyungsoo could really think about at the moment is how Jongin's jawline looks even more prominent under the red lighting and how Jongin smells like sweet strawberries. It must be his shampoo, Kyungsoo concludes.

“I'd really like it if you'd offer to take pictures of me,” Jongin says as he steps back and shows Kyungsoo some of the photos he'd finished developing. “These photos you took with people seriously look amazing to me, hyung. I want to see how you would make me look in photos.”

And just like that, Jongin gets back to work, leaving Kyungsoo flustered and unable to focus.

“I'll think about it,” is what Kyungsoo says after a while, and he's never felt this grateful for how darkrooms required red lighting.

On their next meeting, Jongin lets Kyungsoo read a poem that he wrote.

The piece of paper Jongin gives Kyungsoo is dog-eared, crumpled, and dotted with a lot of erasures, but Kyungsoo manages to read through the words anyway:

I like to think that love would come and find me someday
and that when it does, it would be nothing short of amazing.

I know for sure that love would enter with a bang, surprise me,
pull the ground beneath my feet, and leave me breathless.

I know for sure that love would be like a meteor shower, leaving me wanting
to travel the distance that separates the earth and the sky
just to be with them every minute of my life.

“It's a rough draft, but what do you think, hyung?” Jongin asks.

“I think...” Kyungsoo lets his eyes travel across the piece of paper again. He tries to tell Jongin what he truly felt about the poem, but he's too preoccupied with the biting thought that Jongin's handwriting looked very familiar and that maybe he'd seen Jongin's handwriting before.

“You think?

“It's very... poetic,” Kyungsoo says, as a realization dawns on him. He's grateful for how Jongin showed him his work just as they were about to separate ways. “I'm sorry, but I really have to go, Jongin. If you can, finish the poem and maybe I'll even write a reaction paper on it,” Kyungsoo says in a hurry. He doesn't even give Jongin a chance to respond as he turns and walks away.

Kyungsoo doesn't like how Jongin's handwriting reminds him of the notes he'd been getting from Jongin's older sister, Kiko.