Kim Youngwoon was restless. It was the early morning of the scheduled meeting with Choi Siwon and his dimpled assistant. 2:45am and he couldn’t sleep a wink even if he tried. Not only did his body still have caffeine in its system, his brain refuses to let him sleep with all the thoughts scattered in it. As much as he hated to admit it, ever since the dimpled assistant told him “You are very interesting”, he couldn’t help but think of the first time he met every person he dated. He got affected by it and now he got upset. Not with his former partners, but himself. What in the world did he lack to not be as interesting as another man? What could be the reason for all the women he dated, and for that woman he even proposed to, leave him and call him 'boring'?

He shifted his position on his bed. He wasn’t supposed to be thinking of these useless thoughts so early in the morning. With a light push, he got out of his bed and moved straight to the kitchen fridge. He opens it and crouches down to open the cooler, pulling out a chilled bourbon whisky.

Kangin wasn’t much of a drinker either; in fact, he was even planning to save this for a special occasion or so. Though in the situation he was currently in, where he couldn’t think properly and couldn’t sleep at all, drinking was actually comforting. He got an old-fashioned rock glass and filled it with three cubes of ice before pouring half of the glass with whiskey.

Along with the bottle and glass in each hand, he placed himself on the mini-sofa in his living room. His eyes wandered around his condo unit for a moment. It was cozy… nice enough for him since he was living alone. Two bedrooms, a bathroom that was too extravagant for his taste, a kitchen/dining room, and this living room that had a fireplace he could light up to remove the chills on his body. If he thought about it, four people could have fit under the same roof, but he wasn’t very fond of roommates so it never crossed his mind. Yes, he did like his place, but there was always this empty feeling when he was in here, like there was something missing.

There it was again, that empty feeling, setting in him like non-existent food being swallowed. He took the glass from the table and downed it in one go. He shouldn’t be so affected by such subjective thoughts, it didn’t fit very well with his image as a successful business man in his opinion; but the more he denies the feelings, the more he finds himself affected by it.

Realizing your weakness either makes you stronger, or weaker than ever, He thought, but it was never like that for him. He didn’t get stronger, nor did he grow weaker by it; he was stuck in the phase, lying between those two lines and couldn’t move an inch from the spot.

People would think why the heck would a built man like him be sulking over things like these? He didn’t know either. He dated a lot of different people, but it all ended in the same way… Who wouldn’t be affected? Instead of feeling desperation in finding true love like a delusional hopeless romantic or someone who goes on all out reject to everyone that tried to make a move on him, he was tired. He felt so tired that he didn’t want to deal with sappy heartbreaks with women who cheated on him and leave him on such a random day. He was degraded to the point where he saw no merits in having any relationship, because honestly, it was all going in the same path he was on before.

Kangin poured himself another glass of whiskey, but this time his glass was full. He wanted to turn the TV on until he was interrupted by a high-pitched bark. A small black figure came running to him; it jumped on the sofa and placed itself on the burly man’s lap.

“Chunhyang-ie, did I wake you up??” He asks as if he was asking a baby a question while continuously patting the top of its head, earning a on the hand. Kangin chuckles at the sight of his French bulldog, the only company he would rather have than any person who think he was gullible enough to actually believe them when they say ‘you’re interesting’ in just the first meeting. “Must be nice being you huh.” He muttered as the puppy snuggled to the hem of his shirt. “You just bark and pee all over the place while someone feeds you and bathes you.” He scoffs. “But at least you give me company.”

He could tell the dog was fast asleep from the heavy breaths it was releasing. He looked over to the wall clock that was hanging above the fireplace: 4:25am. He needed to get up at 9am for work and he was meeting the Choi heir at 6pm sharp in a high-class restaurant that was owned by his company.

With almost half of the bottle emptied, and despite him not even being an alcoholic, he was still sober. Surprisingly, he had strong alcohol tolerance, and the first time he found that out was when he finished a bottle of gin tonic all by himself but ended up just tipsy. It shocked him to be honest, but now he just uses that ability whenever there was a only a need to.

It was only a moment till his eyelids felt heavier than usual, the tired feeling setting in his system since his brain couldn’t process anymore thoughts than what he had tonight. The tick of the wall clock seemed to come closer to his ears while he could feel the weight in his lap get lighter. His eyes closed and his consciousness faded.

The late morning wasn’t so bad except he woke up having a massive headache. His 10:30am meeting didn’t go as smoothly as it seemed since his mind was practically falling apart from discussing what color to use for the next bar building. He sat on the leather arm chair that was placed in the middle of his office, his head resting on the top part with an ice pack on his forehead. He lifted up his arm and looked at his wrist watch, 3:59pm, in about two more hours, he will get to see the angelic dimpled man and his so-called ‘organized’ boss.

A knock came to his door once again, he immediately knew who it was. There was only one person who could disturb his rest in this time again. “Come in.” He said in a loud voice but careful enough not to shout.

Hyukjae was standing in the doorway with a white mug in his hand. “Here, brought you some coffee and meds to take out the nasty virus residing in your brain.” He smiles at him.

Kangin sat up, but still held the ice pack to the side of his head. “Thanks Hyukjae.”

Hyukjae placed the mug on the table that was right in front of the other while he handed the medicine to him. “No problem. All these work must be getting to you, or maybe it's the old age you're getting to.” He winked playfully.

The older sighed. “You’re not that far from me you know.” He said while grabbing the mug and drinking the medicine.

“I was joking!” He teased, but soon the smile turned into a concerned frown. “Anyways, are you sure you’re okay for the 6pm meeting? You looked like during the 10:30am meeting.”  It wasn’t unusual to hear Hyukjae cussing in front of his own boss, it was more like Kangin was used to it. The first time Hyukjae cursed with him around was when Kangin accidentally spilled his hot coffee all over his shirt. They were both surprised at first, but they grew to curse without feeling awkward at all. “What the hell happened to you?”

In another story, Hyukjae wasn’t just an ordinary assistant to Kangin as well; he was actually a friend to him… well a close one at that. Remember him mentioning that he had the urge to fire him but he couldn’t since he was fond of the gummy-smiling man? Yeah, this was the reason. He trusted him in a strange and assuring way, so he had no problem with Hyuk staying with him.

“I drank half a bottle of bourbon whisky until 4am, if that’s what you were wondering.”

The younger’s eyes widened in shock. “I know you have really strong alcohol tolereance, but seriously? Are you starting to become an alcoholic now?”

Youngwoon grunted lowly. “No. I just felt like drinking.”

“Wow.” Hyukjae tilted his head and sat beside the older. “Okay Hyung, what’s wrong?”

“What do you mean?”

The younger creased his brow and crossed his arms. “It’s not you to be drinking so randomly unless something’s bothering you.”

In the six years that Hyukjae worked beside him, he got to know him very well… too well in an aspect. So whenever there was something wrong with him, the other would know it like lightning passing through the sky.

Kangin released a heavy sigh before opening his eyes and answering. “Just bothered by the past.”

“Again?!” His assistant stood up flailing his arms. “What is it this time? Did your ex call? Did you see her randomly while walking around in a park? Oh wait! You saw one of them together with their─”

Before he could lose his patience and actually throw the coffee mug at him, he cut him off. “No hyuk, it wasn’t triggered by them.”

“Then what did?”

Kangin wasn’t able to answer… Apparently, he couldn’t.

It wasn’t that Kangin was the type to be nervous in meetings, but there was this hindrance stirring in his stomach. He sat in the restaurant with Hyukjae beside him, waiting for the other two pair to come in. He looked over to his watch, 5:55pm, only five minutes left until the other pair could possibly arrive.

“Hyung!” A voice startled the older and made him flinch slightly.

“What?”

“I’ve been calling you a few times now, seriously, are you okay?”

There was a pause before answering. “Yes.”

“Good, because the Choi heir is here. Get your wits together.” Hyukjae motioned his chin towards the entrance, standing up.

Kangin followed and looked to where Hyukjae's direction was and his stomach churned even more.  A tall built-man in an expensive white suite and red tie strode towards them in long strides, making sure to catch every passing table's attention. The air around him just read ‘iest and richest man alive’, attracting every woman’s attention like pheromones during a creatures mating season. Except it wasn’t the Choi heir that made his stomach churn, it was the man following behind him.

“Wow. He looks cocky and arrogant.” Hyukjae whispers beside him.

He ignored him in that matter. His attention was solely on the man behind the Choi person. He was wearing a gray tux this time, his necktie in a shade of a light blue; his hair was no longer parted in the middle, but styled up showing the sharp structure of his face.

“Ah, Mr. Kim.” The built-man greeted as he approached them, extending his hands forward to Kangin in the process. “It’s a pleasure to finally meet you again.”

“Pleasure is all mine Mr. Choi.” He accepted the hand and shook it gently. “This is my assistant, Lee Hyukjae.”

“It’s a pleasure, Mr. Choi.” Eunhyuk smiled at him while extending a hand, which the other accepted as well.

“I know you have met my assistant as well, Leeteuk?” He moved to get his assistant forward.

Kangin locked gazes with the smaller man. “Yes,” Leeteuk smiled at him, showing the distracting dimples Youngwoon hated. “It’s good to see you again, Mr. Kim.”

“As to you.” He managed to respond in a calm manner and a smile at the same time. “Please,” he motioned his arm to the two seats that were across theirs. “Have a seat and do not hesitate to order anything. Dinner will be in my debt.” He beamed.

“Truly a man of your word. This restaurant is amazingly built.” Siwon complimented as he took his place next to his assistant.

“Why of course, I do need to live up to my company’s name.” He joked. This was one of the things he hated about business meetings, they were actually a bore. All you do is joke and compliment the other all day, like nothing was even real. It was like a reality show that hid all the ‘reality’ in it.

Siwon laughed at his joke. “And indeed you will.”

They continued on with their conversation as they moved on to their meals. While they did, Kangin couldn’t help but steal glances from the dimpled man. He made sure it was only short so no one would notice but there was something bugging him. In those moments he glanced at him, he saw a hint of discomfort in his face… He also seemed a little pale than usual. He also noticed that he seemed to touch his food less and also talk less… He knew right away that there was something wrong.

Right now they we’re on the topic of restructures, and Kangin was listening, but he wasn’t interested in it since every business meeting he had would always have that in between conversations. His mind could only process the uncomfortable expression Choi’s assistant had during the whole exchange. He stole another glance and to his surprise, he looked happy as he talked with Hyukjae, as if the pain was non-existent; but that only lasted a few seconds when Hyukjae turned his attention to the Choi heir again, and Leeteuk’s face now contorting once again.

“Excuse me for a second.” The dimpled man stood up. “I just need to go to the men’s room.” All three of them nodded and they seemed to go back to their conversation earlier, but Kangin secretly followed Leeteuk’s figure until it disappeared into the bathroom just across the room.

“I may have to go to the washroom as well.” He excused himself after wiping the side of his mouth with a napkin. “Excuse me for a moment.” He smiled at the two as they nodded to him in return.

Kangin made sure not to look suspicious as he fastens his pace to the bathroom. He gently opens the door so he wouldn’t be noticed by whoever was in the room, but that left him since he found it empty. All stalls were empty, except for the one at the end of the room. Although it was low, he could still hear a gagging sound. It was Leeteuk.

He hid himself behind the wall where the entrance was. He heard the stall open and clacking of shoes as the water ran from the faucet. Kangin angled his face to get a little glimpse of him; His face was paler than when he was in the table, and he just noticed the dark circles that rimmed below his eyes. Leeteuk splashed his face with water and slapped himself gently on both sides of his face.

“You do know you have every right to call in sick right?” He spoke and walked in on the man.

Leeteuk jumped and gasped from the sudden intrusion as he tightly gripped the edges of the sink. “Oh my─ Mr. Kim! Oh gosh, I almost cursed…” he sighed and lowered his head.

“You’re pretty good in acting… Have to give you credit for that.” He wasn’t smiling. Kangin moved in front to one of the sink and washed his hands to get out the sticky substance left from eating crabs earlier.

“I─ I was fine earlier this day…” The smaller man couldn’t look at him in the eye. “Plus, this meeting was very important…”

“It’s not the matter of a business meeting that gives importance. Nothing matters more than an employee’s health and condition. Your boss should understand that.” He looked at him with a stern face. It wasn’t because he was mad… or maybe he was, but he didn’t like the situation the other was in.

“Mr. Kim, I’ll be fine.” He showed a weak smile but Kangin just got more frustrated.

The taller glared at him, “Says, the one who just vomited a $12 meal.” Honestly, he didn’t even care about the meal. He owned this restaurant so he didn’t give any flying at all.

Leeteuk’s eyes widened and immediately bowed to him. “I’m deeply sorry for wasting the food, I will pay for it, just do not let this affect the arrangements of my boss to your company.”

Kangin narrowed his eyes. Why does he care about this meeting and his boss so much? He was absolutely curious on the thought, but he pushed it away since it wasn’t important for the moment. “I’m not that low to let this affect business. Get up Park Leeteuk.” He grabbed his phone and started to dial. The other stood up straight again and eyed him carefully, wondering what he was about to do. “Yes… tell Jisu to go up the entrance. Yes… Thank you.” He dropped the call and placed the phone in his pocket.

“Mr. Kim?...”

“Let’s go.” He grabs Leeteuk’s shoulder and drags him out of the bathroom.

“Leeteuk just stared in shock. “W-Wait.. What are you trying to do?” He asked stopping the man.

“You’re sick, I’m taking you home.” Kangin continued to push him out of the bathroom.

“But my boss─”

“Park Leeteuk.” The taller male turned him around, the gaze of the other seemed to dig in Leeteuk’s own. “I do not care if your boss means every bit of the world to you, you are sick, and sick people are meant to rest. People who can’t take proper care of their body have no right to work. Not only are you affecting your body but you are affecting your work, do not use this situation to gain some kind of ‘professional' image. ”

Leeteuk shivered at his stare, his words seemed to leave him in a fright. He couldn’t answer back, why? Cause he knew the other man was right… Leeteuk thought he was being professional if he still worked even if he wasn’t feeling well… He had this way of thinking that he shouldn’t let some nausea get in the way of his work but in reality, it affected his work too. He no longer tried to stop the other when he gently pushed him out of the room and out of the restaurant. He felt ashamed for his idiotic way of thinking.

On the other hand, Kangin wasn’t so sure on what he was doing. He had planned to scold him as a higher up but he wasn’t expecting to drive him home, it just happened like he wasn’t in control of his own body. His black Audi was parked in front of the entrance like he instructed and he guided the other to the front seat. He got to the driver’s seat and started the engine. “Seatbelt.” He instructed the other without looking at him, and so Leeteuk followed his command.

The drive was silent for a moment till Kangin broke it, “Where do you live?” he asks, still not making any eye contact.

“Two blocks from gyeongbu expressway…”

“Okay, that’s only 10 minutes away from my place.” He adds.

It been bothering him for a while but he managed to gather his strength and ask. “What about Mr. Choi and your assistant?”

“I’ve already notified them and sent them a text to say that you suddenly felt nauseous.”

“I─I see… I’m very sorry for being such a burden Mr. Kim─”

“Kangin.” He cut him off.

“Pardon?”

“My name is Kangin… well, it’s what everyone calls me. We’re outside of work, you don’t have to be so formal with me.”

Somehow Leeteuk couldn’t bring himself to call him that… even if he was older than him. “I don’t think I’m in a position to call you in such an informal way─”

And for the nth time today he cut him off once again. “And I don’t think you are in the position to decline my offer, now are you?” Kangin smirked.

Despite being weak, a small smile graced its way to the others face. “I suppose your right… But thank you… I owe you Mr. Ki─ Kangin…” His voice seemed to crack at the end.

“You should be thankful I’m not a dreadful bastard who wouldn’t care if you vomited in his restaurant, or worse, a bastard who would have kicked you out.” He joked but kept his eyes on the road. Leeteuk stared at him, seeming a bit surprised at how the man can actually curse so naturally. It was only when Kangin took a short glance at him that he was staring, “I’m sorry, I usually don’t curse in most situations.”

“No, no.” the older reassured, “I was just surprised. I didn’t think you could be such a laid-back person.” He confessed.

A sad smile appeared on his face. “People wouldn’t think so too, to be honest.”

There it is again. Leeteuk said to himself. He saw the exact same expression when they met the first time. When they were greeting each other goodbye. “Why?” He asked unknowingly.

Kangin didn’t answer for a moment. “Like I said, I’m not interesting.”

The smaller male blinked at him, “Why would you say that?”

Kangin wanted to avoid answering that question as much as possible, so it was fortunate that he had reached the man’s home in the same exact time. “We’re here.” He unfastened his seatbelt and went out to Leeteuk’s side and opened the door. “Can you walk properly?”

“Y-Yeah.” The older man felt uneasy as he stood up but there were strong arms that supported him. “Thank you.”

Leeteuk’s home was small, but small enough for him to live alone. Unlike Kangin, he actually lived in a house that looked well but had an aged-look from the cracked walls on the front porch. Kangin supported the other as he walked to his front door. “Do you live alone?”

Leeteuk nodded and grabbed the keys that were in his pocket. “Yes, I do.”

“Parents?”

Leeteuk just smiled at him and didn’t answer, which made Kangin regret asking the question. “Thank you Mr. Ki─ Kangin… I’m also sorry for giving you unnecessary trouble.”

“It wasn’t a trouble.” He answered sternly, more sternly than he thought because Leeteuk flinched and looked at him right in the eyes.

Kangin looked away immediately, the burdensome feeling setting in again. No. Only until this extent. “You should get some rest.” He stepped down from the door. “I’ll see you again Mr. Park.”

“Jungsoo.” The other man called out before Kangin could walk away. “My real name is Jungsoo.”

He knows he shouldn’t be, but he was smiling. “Goodnight Jungsoo.” He greeted as the other waved and went inside his house.

Kangin’s drive back home was a mess in every aspect. One moment he was happy, one moment he regrets every action he has done from this extent. What the hell am I doing? He asks himself as he waited for the stoplight to turn green. “Kim Youngwoon, stop this now.” He muttered.

If you don’t, it will only end badly. An inner voice kept reminding him. It may look like it’s going to work, but it’s not… accept it already. No person will ever end up with you, especially a man.

He didn’t even know that he could be attracted to guys… So why start now?

It was only a 10 minute drive back to his condo, but it seemed to take forever with all the thoughts disturbing his brain.

What have I gotten myself into?

A/N: I'M SORRY IF THERE ARE TYPOS. IT'S 1:30AM HERE AND I NEED TO GET UP 5:30 FOR MY CLASSES ;__;

BUT HERE! UPDATE <3 THANK YOU TO THE PEOPLE WHO SUBSCRIBED <3 YA'LL ARE BLESSINGS.
And I do really appreciate comments and it motivates me to write so please keep on commenting <3