Everyone had settled in the great hall, the ceiling void of any sky nor colour. His body and coffin was obviously not in the castle, it was sent to the Lee manor where his parents held their own wake that Taemin refused to go to; he wasn't welcomed to begin with. There was no doubt that his parents blamed him for the death of their preferred child so they said their own goodbyes without Taemin. It was clear the death wasn't as devastating to them however as they placed a decorative tombstone in the rose garden and gave Taemin Jinki's ashes to do with as he pleased, even though Jinki was their favourite son they knew nothing about him and wouldn't know where to scatter his ashes for him to rest in peace; not like they cared anyway. They were more annoyed over the fact they had lost their heir instead of being traumatized over loosing their own son. 

 

Taemin didn't have energy to be mad however as he had done nothing but morn since that fateful day. He cried himself to sleep every night and the only comfort was Jonghyun's embrace. Some days they wouldn't even return to their dorms to sleep, they would simply spend the night on the prefect bathroom floor as Taemin now refused to even go near the heads dormitory (prefects ignored them out of respect for the head boy). He was usually composed during the day and was able to mask his obvious heartbreak around others. 

 

But now as headmaster Lee Sooman spoke and with his brothers ashes in one hand and Jonghyun's hand in the other he couldn't control the tears rolling down his face nor did he even attempt to wipe them away.

 

The entire student body was present for the head boy's farewell and they created a sea of black. Those who usually dyed their hair bright colours, such as Kai, Krystal and Kibum have since returned to their natural darks as a form of respect and Taemin was grateful. Jinki deserved nothing but respect, he was a hard working student, an exceptionally talented wizard, a strong leader, a caring friend and the best brother Taemin could ever ask for.

 

"As you all know we are here to honour the life of our head boy, Lee Jinki. He truly was a treasure and loved by all. I'm sure everyone feels some loss, some more than others" he cast his somber eyes towards Taemin and Luna "but it is now our duty to keep his legacy alive, to preserve his life and those who knew him best will cherish their memories of him forever. He was an outstanding young man and although he was a Ravenclaw and showed amazing talent in his academics, I saw he had qualities from every house. As a first year I saw him as a very ambitious young boy, a Slytherin's pride grew within him. He struggled as does everyone yet conquered through hard work, the patience and perseverance of a Hufflepuff and through his last moment was Gryfinndor revealed" he then stared directly at Taemin who now dropped his head in shame and guilt, his tears falling to the ground.

 

"The bravery of self sacrifice. He had the heart of a lion" Jonghyun began to tear up at that statement and squeezed Taemin's hand, he knew the headmaster was only trying to be sincere but he couldn't help but feel as if Taemin would be better off not hearing these words; he obviously stilled blamed himself and not even Jonghyun could convince him otherwise. "Lee Jinki will live on in all of us and we will never forgot how he had brightened the school as well as our hearts" 

 

 

It was after the funeral that Taemin was dreading the most, he would scatter Jinki's ashes and would have to finally say goodbye. Luna would obviously be present and he had to bring Jonghyun, the only person keeping him stable. It was such a sad situation in that this was the most he'd ever spoken to Luna but they discussing where to leave the remains of a shared loved one. 

 

It was obvious that they would do the deed somewhere on the Hogwarts grounds; Jinki loved the school they were sure he would approve but they couldn't pinpoint the exact location. Jonghyun however knew exactly where they should and the subconscious suggestion made Taemin's eyes widen and he cursed at himself for thinking of it sooner.  Jinki had never seen the botanical masterpiece Taemin had kept hidden on the grounds, it would only be right for him to see it now. They explained to Luna where the garden was and she seemed eager to go but Taemin was confused.

Was it just going to be the three of them? Jinki was extremely popular amongst his peers he must at least have a few close friends who would want to be present, a best friend perhaps?

 

When he voiced his concern Luna sadly shook her head "he always considered you his best friend"

 

The blooming flowers would be a perfect sight for Jinki, he would've loved it and Taemin regretted keeping secrets from him but now wasn't the time to hold onto something he couldn't change. 

Taemin looked to his left and saw Luna trying to hide her sobs behind her hands, Jonghyun on his right freely letting his tears fall down his face. Taemin had thought he cried himself dry but his vision blurred as his eyes watered again; the reality of the situation seemed to finally sink in. He would have to say goodbye, forever; he would never see Jinki again. After his death Taemin still wished that it was all just a nightmare and he would wake up in a perfect world with perfect parents and an older brother who had always been perfect.  

 

It was time. Taemin carefully emptied the vase onto a patch where nothing grew. "Thank you" Taemin whispered to the ground and at that point Luna couldn't control herself any longer and her wails echoed over the black lake, Taemin took her into his arms as he mimicked her cries. She repeated  "He's gone" over and over again but it was muffled by Taemin. "He's really gone" Jonghyun understood their pain but a spot of green caught his eye.

 

He edged closer a small green shoot emerging from the ashes. "Um, I don't think he really is" 

Life was spawning from death. Taemin saw this as a message from Jinki beyond the grave, that he was alright and just as Sooman had said he would live on within Hogwarts, hopefully literally as his spirit would flourish in Taemin's happy place. He would continue to watch over Taemin for years to come.

 

*

 

It became a struggle for Taemin to even get out of bed for the first few weeks. He was grateful to sleep in a warm bed again, his body was so tired and put under so much stress that he wanted to sleep for years until he stopped hurting but he knew it would never go away, the twinge he felt when he thought of Jinki would always stay with him but so would the warmth from Jonghyun. 

 

He had rested all throughout April and he even had May to mourn his loss before he would be forced to write his OWLs June. While his entire year along with seventh years flooded the library In hopes of cramming in last minute studying, Taemin stayed behind. Kai and Krystal would drop books by his bed as Taemin refused to be around large groups of people; he needed to be alone and only Jonghyun was allowed in his bubble however after being caught sneaking into the Slytherin dungeons multiple times he had been reprimanded and given a warning to stay with his own house. 

 

 Jonghyun had suggested to use his invisibility cloak but Taemin told him he'd be fine and he mustn't go through the trouble, he didn't think he was worth it. 

 

After the last lesson of the day everyone filled the library, or their common rooms to get ahead of their studies but Taemin laid on his bed, staring at the ceiling. 

This was selfish, he was wasting time as his OWLs were racing towards him. Jinki wanted the best for him, to achieve the marks he deserved by the end of year. Lying on his bed would do him no good and he could only imagine that if Jinki were there he would rip the covers out from under him and force him to get up, it was times like this when he truly missed Jinki's nagging voice. 

 

He couldn't disappoint Jonghyun either, the Gryfinndor had spent months tutoring for no reason other than wanting to see Taemin reach his full potential. 

He didn't want their study sessions in the library to go to waste, especially since they meant so much to Taemin. 

 

That was when he pushed himself up and knew what he had to do, he stuffed his bag with quills and books he hadn't touched in weeks. He rushed to the library and managed to catch the stairs before they moved. When he arrived he held his breathe and tried to hid his discomfort amongst the crowd of his peers. Books zoomed passed his head and he skillfully avoided any conversation.

 

A panel of light caught his attention while everything else was shrouded by the shadows of the tall shelves. By the table near the window sat Jonghyun, surrounded by piles of books stacked so high you could barely see him, his white hair peaking through and Taemin could make out his concentration as he was immersed in whatever he was reading. Taemin didn't even notice Kibum and Minho at his side nor did he see Kai and Krystal sitting across from them, they all smirked once they saw his love struck face. 

 

Taemin silently approached and was taken aback by the speed at which Jonghyun was repeating his transfiguration notes in his mind. Taemin pulled a chair beside Jonghyun and deconstructed the tower of books to reveal his face, giving Jonghyun a fright. The gang chuckled at this before being shushed loudly. 

Jonghyun moved closer and gave Taemin's hand a slight squeeze as he whispered "welcome back"

 

They used the time to study as well organizing their own schedules, Taemin and Jonghyun never writing the same exam in the same venue so no accidental cheating could take place. They would probably be too stressed or focused on their own tests to even have the energy to creep into each other's mind for answers but it was a risk they couldn't take. 

 

 

Taemin was never confident when it came to school nor did he care if he received poor marks from his mediocre effort but as he walked into his theory of herbology exam he couldn't help but take pride in himself. He was going to impress everyone important to him and his parents weren't on that list.