four 

2010 - twenty-four

a little like hope and dreams and love 

* * * * * 

The first year after Jaejoong, Yoochun, and Junsu left following the filing of the lawsuit was hard. 

It was bad for the company because their stocks dropped like hot potatoes within those first few weeks following the announcement of the lawsuit (and although things were stable again now, it’s just not the same as before). 

And it was hard for Changmin too (he’d lost not one, but three hyungs all at once, and it didn’t help that he’d always been the most attached to Jaejoong). It was especially hard for Yunho (because Jaejoong was his best friend too, and with three members gone from DBSK, the future of the group was unclear, hence their indefinite hiatus). 

But for some reason, Boa was all right (at least in the beginning anyways because she forced herself to not think about it). 

It definitely helped that SM finally decided to take her back into their good graces (probably because they needed her now more than ever before since the golden boys of the company were no more). And it’s as if they somehow knew she (and Yunho and Changmin) could have left with JYJ (could have left with Jaejoong). But they’d stayed. She’d stayed. 

And for staying, they’ve decided to treat her (and the remaining two) better than ever before. 

For her, it was a series of concerts, a bunch of commercials and advertisements, and even her first full-length album comeback in Korea after almost five years. 

And even though the schedule was hellish (maybe even worse than ever, considering how little sleep she’d already gotten before), it worked for her. Because it meant she had to focus all of her attention on her job, so she wouldn’t have time to think about anything else (so she wouldn’t have time to miss anyone, so she wouldn’t have time to miss him). 

And she did exactly that. Day and night, for weeks, months, all she did was go to the recording studio, the practice rooms, different shooting locations, concert venues, and home, keeping a very meticulous (almost borderline obsessively-compulsive) order in her life. Every day was the same. She did what she was told,