"Saw your face, heard your name, Isn't this why we came? Gotta get with you, Girls like girls like boys do, nothing new."

It was the summer of my eighteenth year, a long three months filled with many ups and downs and twists and turns that would ultimately change my life. I was barely legal enough to smoke, let alone be drinking, and took up the habit that year just because I could. My mother had told me I was going to hell for it, but little did she know there was another thing I was headed down the path of sin for. If only she knew. 

I wasn't like the other girls, I was a bit short in stature, medium length dyed blonde hair that stopped just at the top of my shoulders. I'd finally lost my baby fat that for some reason my figure clung to all through high school, in exchange for a more womanly body that I was still growing accustomed to despite the fact that I'd dropped the weight months ago. I had traded my old acid wash blue jeans for a pair of cut off shorts the rest about two inches below my cheeks, and my normal baggy t-shirts for a crop top that showed off my contours in just the right way. At least that's what Tiffany told me it did. 

Stephanie Hwang, whom I affectionately nick named Tiffany when we met, was my childhood best friend who moved to town when I was three years old and we'd been inseparable since. She was much prettier than me with sharper features, pretty chocolate brown eyes that shifted colors in the sun, long hair black as the night sky, rosy pink lips that were oh so kissable, not that I would know since I'd never gotten the chance to kiss her. 

All my life I had been in love with Tiffany, ever since I laid eyes on her. She was so kind and caring and loved others, there wasn't one thing about her that I didn't love. When I was a small child I knew I was in love with her, even if I didn't know that loving a girl was considered frowned upon in modern day society. I thought that if I loved someone then that was it- I loved them. It shouldn't have mattered what gender they were, and yet I was told that one day I had to marry a man. Once I'd reached the age of understanding, and my mother sat down and explained the "truth" to me, I realized just how ludicrous it all was. So what if I liked a girl? It was my life, I should be able to choose who I want to love. But if I dared say anything about the matter I knew I would be in for it. My parents were so Christian, anyone who was a homoual was going to hell and would be punished by God on every account for defiling what was "sacred" in the bible. 

For me, everything she said was disgusting. Once I'd had that conversation I made up my mind that I would never be like my mother. I loved Tiffany, that was that. 

I was almost convinced that Tiffany had the same feelings for me, until one day I was introduced to her boyfriend. Ah, boyfriends, the right of passage that every little girl dreams of having from the time their old enough to like boys. And then there was me, crushing on my best friend. It killed me when I had to help her get ready for their first date, her blabbing on and on about how handsome he was, how sweet he was, how kind and funny and outgoing he was. It made me want to vomit. And yet, like a good friend, I picked out her outfit and did her hair and makeup and even gave her my bracelet for good luck. I thought she was gone, I thought I'd lost the one person who I knew would truly make me happier than anyone else in the world ever could. 

Until the summer of my eighteenth year. 

~*~

The summer sun was warm on my cheeks as I road on my bike down from my house to Tiffany's, cars lined all along the street in front of family houses with lots of kids. Wearing the usual- shorts, crop top, jean jacket and my back pack loosely clung to me while swerving back and forth in the middle of the street, I hummed a soft tune that mirrored the sound of the birds. We lived a huge suburban neighborhood, complete with matching houses that mirrored every other home in our large subdivision and great back yards that everyone played in every day. Tiffany's house was only different from the rest because she had a pool, in which we would swim in at least five times a week. The sound of birds coming out from their hiding spots set the background while I pulled into Tiffany's drive way, laying my yellow painted bike on the worn concrete as I came to a halt. Typical of my style, I slid one of the straps off my back pack when I approached Tiffany's front door, giving the large oak a good knocking for her to hear.

It only took two knocks for her to reach the door, opening it and offering me a bright smile to which I returned. "Hey you!" Tiffany said, wrapping one arm around my neck in a tight hug as she brought me into the house. I could see her boyfriend, Minho, out of the corner of my eye but paid no attention to him for a moment as I was focused on my friend. "Hey Tiff," I replied, looking down at the doorstep so I wouldn't trip before entering. And then he had to interrupt. "Hey, Taeyeon." Minho said, wrapping his right arm around my neck and ruffling my hair gently. "I didn't know you were coming over." He sounded slightly surprised, as if Tiffany hadn't told him I was coming over to go swimming before the party. 

"Yes you did," Tiffany retorted, grabbing my hand. "I told you an hour ago, Minho. Don't pay attention to him Taeyeon." She smiled softly and gave my hand a squeeze. "You can put your stuff down in my room, we'll be in the kitchen." 

I didn't say much per my personality so I nodded, walking down the hallway to put my bag down and returned to said kitchen where Tiffany had said she would be waiting for me. Minho was perched next to Tiffany who sat with her legs dangling off the counter, a lit cigarette hanging from her lips. "We need to get set up for the party," Minho said walking by me as I walked into the room. I hopped up on the counter next to Tiffany, chuckling at her when she'd taken a puff of her cigarette and blew it in my face playfully. She didn't say anything in response to Minho nor to my chuckle, holding the cigarette up to my lips and having me take a drag before leaving to in my mouth for me to smoke. 

I loved it when she would give me her cigarettes. It was almost as if she was indirectly kissing me, and every time I thought about the fact that her lips had once been where mine were it made my heart race. I slowly let out the puff I'd taken, staring at Tiffany the whole time who smiled sweetly at me. We could both hear Minho talking faintly in the distance while he retrieved a beer for himself, knocking back a sip as I looked over at him to see what he was yammering on about. Tiffany had already begun to light her second cigarette, tapping mine with hers and grinning. "Yeah babe, I know, we gotta get stuff set up for the party." She said, waving him off. The way she waved her hand reminded me of the time we all went to an abandoned property to hang out and Tiffany had danced for me.

Minho had insisted that we go check it out, grabbing his bat and baseballs and heading us out to this place I didn't even know existed. Tiffany had grabbed her boom box and my hand and never let it go the entire time we walked to this strange place. But once we got there and Minho was settled with himself, Tiffany sat down the boom box and began dancing. 

She was so beautiful, her arms above her head as she moved to the rhythm of the music while the sun danced along her gorgeous body. Tiffany was one with the wind. Hips swaying side to side, hair whipping all around her face, slow movements as she turned around to face me. I was mesmerized in a spell binding trance of the girl I loved, unable to take my eyes off of the gorgeous vision in front of me. And I never wanted to. 

"Tae," I was snapped out of my thoughts by Tiffany speaking to me, her hand waving in front of my face. "Earth to Taeyeon." She was giving me that look again. "Did you even hear me?" Tiffany asked, her hazel eyes staring at me closely. 

I stumbled a minute, knocking some of the ashes off my cigarette before taking a drag. "No, sorry, what did you say?" I asked, mentally kicking myself for getting lost in my own thoughts. 

"Minho's gonna go set out the stuff for the party and then we're gonna swim before everyone gets here. Let's go change into our swim suits." Tiffany was already off the counter, her hand held out to me while waiting for me to join her. I hesitated only a moment before snuffing out my cigarette and placing my hand in the palm of her soft ivory skin.  It felt so...soft...so delicate, not calloused like my own. It made me wonder if the rest of her body matched her hand.

Why did she make me feel so...hot? What was it about Tiffany that no one else had? It wasn't like I hadn't looked at other girls and thought they weren't attractive, but with Tiffany...she was the only one I ever felt a spark with. I wanted to feel the spark grow bigger and turn into a raging fire, something that could burn betwe-

"We can change in my room," I heard Tiffany say as she dragged me down the hall way toward her bedroom. "I'll face the mirror so it's not awkward." 

Damn, I lost my train of thought. Oh well. A new one had begun seeing as she had mentioning changing. It wasn't like normal where you would leave your bra and on while you slipped into a new pair of clothes. No, Tiffany was going to be fully in front of me. Well, sort of.

It's not awkward to me. I thought, bitting my lip nervously between my teeth. If only she understood just how much I love her, how beautiful she was in my eyes, then maybe we might have had a chance together after all. 

As I stood on front of the mirror, I took a breath before slipping my jacket off, happening to look over my shoulder and catch a glimpse of Tiffany's . God it was beautiful...like an empty canvass just begging to be marked and painted on. She had a slight tan thanks to the sun, but no tan lines. It let me know she had been going topless again. With bated breath I stared, seeing that she wasn't moving until she reached down to pick up her swim top putting it on and beginning to tie it in place before turning to face me. "Need any help?" She asked, her voice soft and caring. I quickly shook my head and cleared my throat, hurrying to dress before Minho came barging through the door or something. "No thanks, I'm okay." I replied, my voice soft like hers had been before watching her leave an taking a deep breath once she was gone. 

I could feel my heart racing the thought of knowing that Tiffany had been topless with me in the same room still burned into my mind...and a string of other ideas coming along with it.

~*~

"Hey Tiff, come here." I called, waiting until my friend was close enough before taking a bit of water and playfully spraying it on her face. We had been in the pool, just she and I, for a good few minutes that was until Minho did a cannon ball into the pool behind me. I would have rather kept playing with Tiffany on my own, laughing as she had been about to get me back before her boyfriends joined in. And of course he swam over to her and scooped her up, putting her on his back before swimming away from me. 

It was always like that, even if it was a friend Minho was so possessive over Tiffany and hardly let anyone be near her, let alone be alone with her. Don't even get me started on what it was like when she was around other guys. I watched them play, Tiffany smiling which made me smile. But there was something different about her smile, like some sort of shift that was bothering her. I wanted to ask, but of course that was for another time when we were alone.

Once we had all gotten pruney, we climbed out of the pool to dry off and decided to sun bath for a little while. Minho on the pool chair, Tiff with her legs dangling in the pool while she laid back on her beach towel, and me lying beside her drying off. And suddenly Minho sat up. "I'm gonna go set up and put the drinks out, we have about an hour till everyone get's here." He said, giving me a look that was...rather nasty. Did I do something wrong? Tiffany of course tried to say something but he simply waved her off, taking a sip of his drink and heading inside. Just as quick as the fun had started it ended, and I found myself with my knees curled to my chest and wondering what had just silently gone down between the three of us.

~*~

It was time to get dressed, so we both hurried to take a shower, separately, not together. I wish it could have been together with me in the shower, but of course I didn't say a word and Tiffany didn't suggest it. "Hey, Tae, when I get out can you paint my nails?" Tiffany asked as I walked back through fully dressed in my out fit from previously that afternoon. I nodded in response, smiling and raising my hand to keep my towel from falling off my head. "Sure." I said, heading into the room in search of my shoes. 

Tiffany offered me the same smile back, nodding herself and heading off to the bathroom to shower. It wasn't long after she was gone that I sat down on her bed and ran my hand over my face, tossing my dirty swim suit into the trash bag after and then throwing it in my back pack. I had to get ahold of myself, grab what bit if sanity I had left by the horns and not let go because honestly...this little crush was getting out of hand. I was so lost in my thoughts thinking about it that I hadn't heard or seen Minho walk in until he snapped his fingers in front of my face. "Hello? Where's my girlfriend?" he asked, putting emphasis on the fact that she belonged to him.

I blinked, looking up and stuttering for a moment before pointing. "She's in the shower." I replied, my voice soft, unknowing that he was sending some sort of message to me. He didn't take the time to explain, however, walking out and going to the bathroom door to tell his girlfriend whatever it was he needed to talk to her about. 

A few minutes later Tiffany called me to the bathroom, smiling as I walked in and patting the cold tiled floor. "Come cool off, plus it'll be easier to paint my nails. Mom doesn't want stains on the carpet." I didn't respond with anything other than a nod, walking over and curling up my knee so she could place her delicate hand on top of it. I liked the warmth it gave off, sending tingles up my leg to my spine. Like I could feel her in every nerve of my body.  And as time went on I began to take not that Tiffany had been watching me.

She was looking at me again, her doe like hazel eyes fixated on my hand that painted her nails. I could clearly see out of my peripheral vision that her gaze was solely focused on me. In the quiet of the room I could hear my heart pounding, the soft thud thud that made my hand tremble every time I ran the brush along Tiffany's colorless nail bed. Could she hear it? The never ending beat that fueled my nervous shaking. And then she smiled. Oh God that smile, one that had my stomach flipping over and over in inside my body. Did she know what she was doing to me?

"Tae," Her gentle voice carried over my ears and straight to my racing chest cavity. "Do you think this color looks nice on my nails?" Tiffany asked, her eyes never leaving my face for a moment.

I glanced up only a moment, eyes locking with hers before looking back down. I honestly didn't know what to say or how to speak, my own words getting hung in my throat that was a little to dry. "Yeah," is answered weakly, swallowing once to gain my bearings, before offering her a smile. "You look nice no matter what color you wear."

It was a small compliment that held more meaning to me than I was sure it meant to her. But it was worth it just to see the bright smile that appeared along her rose colored lips. "Thank you, Taeyeon." Tiffany whispered, biting her lower lip as she glanced down at her nails and silence engulfed us once again. We didn't have to speak when we were together. I knew what she was thinking just like she knew me. Though I don't think she'll ever know what truly lied in my heart. Tiffany had a boyfriend. Tiffany was happy with her life. We would always be best friends. And even though that hurt me, I was content in knowing I would always be by her side.

~*~

What was it with her staring? It was like i had something on my face and it made me wonder if she was really looking at me or judging me for something. After I did her nails and they dried, we had taken out hair down and dried it for each other but then Tiffany volunteered to do my makeup. I didn't wear makeup often, but when Tiffany was the one offering to do it I wasn't going to turn her down or say no.

She had finished all but my lips, and as she slowly dragged the tinted lip gloss across my lower lip I began to wonder what was going through her mind. "Tiff?" I asked, looking deep into her eyes. Neither of us spoke, a sort of breathy silence settling between us that was much different from the one in the bathroom. I waited, wanting to know id she was going to answer me or stay quiet, but she never said a word, gently shaking her head and going on with what she was doing. 

We didn't speak again until the party started, lounging on the sofa and discussing some things about the summer that had only just begun for us, and college that would start in the fall. But just when I was about to talk to her Minho came by, slightly drunk, and yanked her from her seat. "Hey gorgeous, let's dance, stop ignoring me~" He reasoned, wrapping his
arms around her waist and trying to sway back and forth. 

"Minho, get off me," Tiffany tried, attempting to wiggle away from him in a way that wouldn't embarrass him. I knew she didn't wanna dance, she was talking, and when she talked she preferred to stay on the topic of what she was talking about otherwise she would never get back to it. I could see the desperation in her eyes to get away from him, looking at me and trying to figure out a way to get him off of her. Finally when she had enough she said so. "Minho, let go." Tiffany hissed, looking at him with sharp gaze before sitting back down next to me. 

Scoffing, Minho rolled his eyes and walked away, muttering a soft 'Whatever' as he did so. I simply gave Tiffany a small sympathetic smile and took a drink, listening to her say sorry before going on with what we had been talking about. And of course Minho went back to drinking.

~*~

A little while later I went looking for Tiffany, seeing as she had been dragged off by her much stronger boyfriend once again. I hated it when he would just drag her away, especially when she was around her friends. Tiffany wasn't meant to be kept in a cage, she was meant to be set free and let herself live. And while I walked through the house I ran my fingers along the pictures on the walls, memories of the past that reminded us of a simpler time, one where boys and feelings and emotions didn't exist.

Upon checking every room, I checked the office that lead out to the pool in the back yard, seeing Minho asleep in the chair. I had a hunch of where I could find Tiffany, so I slipped me jacket over my shoulders and walked out, spotting my best friend sitting on the edge of the pool. "Hey," I said softly, noticing her mood from earlier was back, and sat down next to her before scooting close and sticking my feet in the pool. "You okay?" I asked.

Tiffany looked over at me and shrugged, visibly swallowing before moving closer and laying her head on my shoulder. "It's nothing Tae...I'll be fine." She said, nuzzling her head into my shoulder. I looked down at the water, knowing that she was giving me a bull answer and hummed. "I know that's not true." I replied softly. 

And then there was a moment. 

A moment where I felt Tiffany shifting, her head turning up to look at me. Was she going to speak? Was she going to be upset with me? What was happening? I saw that same look in her eye, the one that looked at me when I painted her nails, the one that mad my heart stop, the one that made me think that in another life we could have been together and been happy. And for a moment I felt my heart stop. 

Tiffany was moving forward, her lips slightly parted. Was this it? I had dreamed for so many years about this moment, and it looked like it was about to happen for me. I held my breath, closing my eyes just as our lips were about to meet, and then I felt a tug to my hair.

I didn't register what had happened until I heard faint yelling, a ringing in my ears as I cracked open my eyes and looked up at the sky.

"Are you kidding me?!" Minho had yelled, yanking Tiffany up off the ground roughly by her arms and beginning to yell at her. I couldn't make a lot of it out, but he was clearly pissed for having caught us trying to kiss. Most guys would be thrilled, seeing as girl on girl action is considered a turn on to most men, but not Minho. He was furious. "You don't look at her, you look at me, you disgusting , I'm your boyfriend not her!" He shouted, that part I could make out clearly. And it made my blood boil to hear it. 

Minho had yanked my hair and threw me into the grass where my face hit some rocks, so thanks to him I now had a cut on my cheek and corner of my lip. And now I was pissed. But what pissed me off the most was that I could hear Tiffany crying. That's what made me snap.

"I-I'm sorry.." Tiffany cried softly, to which Minho replied with a quick. "You keep your mouth shut, you've done enough already." And that's when I jumped in.

"How dare you do this to me, I-" I cut him off in the middle of his sentence by slamming the back of his head with my fist, growling and shouting as he fell to the ground. I didn't think about what I was doing, I just did it, blindly punching and hitting him and letting out all the anger that I had kept pent up inside me toward him. He had never treated her right, he had never given her the love and car she deserved, he had always viewed her as nothing more than a piece of meat and it pissed me off more than anything. "You son of a !" I shouted, hitting him over and over again.

Scene's of Tiffany and I laughing, painting out nails, turning on music and dancing in her room played over and over in my head, along with the day she danced for me. That was the Tiffany I knew, not the one Minho had created for his own gain. And as I punched I suddenly felt arms around me, pulling me off him and standing me up. "Taeyeon, Tae stop he's out cold," She said, tears trickling down her face as she helped me up and turned me around. 

It made me sad to see her crying, but I simply swallowed and looked at her, waiting for her to say something else. "I didn't like how he was treating you," I said, feeling tears of my own. "He was hurting you..I'm sorry.." I whispered. Tiffany didn't care, shaking her head and reaching with her hand to brush my hair out of my face and in the mean time wiping some of the blood off my forehead. "Don't apologize," She whispered back, lowering her hand and wiping her thumb gently over my busted lip. I could feel my heart racing again, knowing that we wouldn't be interrupted again this time. I raised my hand to her wrist, gently holding it and smiling as she looked at me, waiting for her to make her move. 

Then I felt the spark turn into a raging fire. Tiffany had cupped my face, pulling me into a deep kiss, holding me there for a minute and feeling her lips against my own. When she pulled away to breath I giggled, smiling and closing my eyes while pressing her forehead against mine. "I love you," Tiffany whispered, grinning from ear to ear as well and kissing me once again. She said she loved me. She loved me! She loved me! I wanted to scream and jump for joy, nudging her nose with mine before kissing her once more.

When we pulled away I laughed, watching Tiffany laugh as well before pulling her into a tight hug and holding her close. "I always loved you," I whispered, kissing her neck and sniffling. "Ever since we were little, I loved you, I never stopped. I always wanted you, Stephanie." I whispered, kissing her ear and smiling. I could feel Tiffany grinning on my neck as well, nodding and pulling back to look at me once more. "I know.." She whispered. "I always knew...I was just to afraid to say anything until now... that's why Minho is so upset." She said and cupped my face. "I told him I loved you and that I didn't know what I was going to do about it. Now I know what I want." She whispered, kissing me one more time. "I want you."

She wanted me. That's all I needed to hear from her to know that we were making the right decision. "I love you Tiff.." I whispered and kissed her lips against just so I could keep tasting them. But as we both heard a soft groan, we knew we had little time. Tiffany jumped, moving over to Minho and punching him in the jaw to knock him out before coming back to me. "You're not safe here, neither of us are." She told me and took me back inside the house. "Listen, we need to get out of here, go home and pack up your big duffel back with your clothes and and then meet me outside your house when night comes okay? We're getting the hell out of here." I nodded, giving her a goodbye kiss and hug before dashing back into the house to grab my backpack before running out to my bike and hopping on.

The summer sun that was slowly beginning to set beat down on my as I rode home, this time a smile on my face while the cuts still bled. I didn't care. I laughed softly as I rode home, closing my eyes and feeling the wind before hurrying to get home. I was with Tiffany. She was mine and I was hers. At long last we were together and nothing would ever tear us apart. I didn't need to worry about anything, I knew that once we were home free of this life, of these people, that we would be able to live happily together. And that alone was enough to give me comfort, the large smile growing wider and wider the longer I rode down the road.

____

I finally finished this fic! I know you guys had to wait forever and I'm so sorry, but thank you for sticking with it as long as you did. T_T You all rock! I hope you enjoyed this little idea that came out of my brain, and all together this is a little over 5,000 words. Woah. Like holy . That's a lot for me. 

Anyways, thank you again and I'll see you in the next story I update!

-Kyla<3