It’s a small cry that has Chanyeol stirring out of his sleep, it’s an even louder cry that fully awakens him. He opens his eyes and is met with a dark room minus the moonlight peering from the window. His sleep time wasn’t that long since he finally laid his head down after a strenuous day around 1am. Just by the crying Chanyeol knows that its 3am, that’s the usual time the baby wakes up.

“I got it,” Chanyeol calls out, sleep still evident in his voice, when he hears Baekhyun moving around on the main bed.

“Thanks,” Baekhyun mumbles through the pillow.

Chanyeol could hear Baekhyun despite the baby’s crying. He stretches real quick and carefully rolls off the uncomfortable blow up mattress before walking to the source of the crying.

This has been an everyday occurrence for the past week. Around this time the baby would wake up for his pre-morning bottle and require someone to rock him back to sleep. Usually it’s Baekhyun who runs to the baby’s rescue but this week has been rough for Baekhyun because of his finals and his two part time jobs, so it’s been Chanyeol rushing to go feed the baby while Baekhyun rested.

Chanyeol enters the nursery, which is really a small room that’s an extension to the living room, and he scoops up the five month old from his crib. The crying dies down and turns into whines once the baby is in Chanyeol’s arms.

“Is Heojunnie hungry?” Chanyeol speaks aloud although he won’t be receiving an answer.

Chanyeol rests the Heojun’s head on his shoulder and carries him into the kitchen so he can make up the bottle.

Baekhyun is running low on formula. Chanyeol realizes this when he opens up the fridge and the last bottle of formula on the top shelf is half empty. He takes note to run to the store and stock up on baby formula even if he will be late for his Communications class (and even if it’s crazy expensive). His professor will understand.

Once Chanyeol pours the formulated milk he places the bottle in the microwave to warm up. Baekhyun was able to afford rice cereal this week unlike the previous. Chanyeol was more than happy to add it into the bottle if it meant Heojun would stay satisfied for a good amount a time.

At this point Heojun is restless for food and he starts crying again. Chanyeol has to start lightly bounce on his heels to create some sort of a rocking motion to soothe the baby.

The attempt to calm Heojun down fails miserably when Heojun starts crying harder. The only thing that will stop him from crying is his precious food.

Chanyeol takes the bottle out of the microwave and shakes it up to regulate the temperature so it’s not extremely hot at the top but cold on the bottom. He double checks the temperature again before giving it to Heojun.

Heojun starts drinking immediately and a little too quickly for Chanyeol’s liking but he still thinks it’s cute nonetheless. Since Heojun is not at all a small baby, Chanyeol goes to the living room to sit so his arm can rest.

Chanyeol admires Heojun as the baby eats. His eyes are fully open, showing off his long eyelashes and big round eyes. Chanyeol still has to help Heojun hold the bottle despite Heojun learning how to hold his bottle on his own; His grip is not quite there yet.

Heojun has gotten really big. His already wearing 6-9 month clothing, and these clothes are barely fitting. His hair has grown some too; the last time Chanyeol saw Heojun he was borderline bald. Normally Chanyeol didn’t see the baby too much because of his schedule and Baekhyun’s forever busy schedule. Hell, Chanyeol barely even got to see Baekhyun since he was always working or in a class.

Chanyeol has just recently seen them for two weeks straight since he’s been staying with the two. The house he’s currently living in is currently under renovation and the renovation time it between 4-5 weeks. It was an inconvenience for Chanyeol and his housemates but they all weighed the pros and the cons and getting a much nicer living room and lounge area is worth the wait.

Baekhyun was very kind to let Chanyeol stay with him. Chanyeol told him that he didn’t have to let him stay because he didn’t want to be a bother but Baekhyun said it was all good. They are close friends after all. The only thing that Baekhyun asked Chanyeol to do was clean up after himself and Chanyeol had no problem with that (Baekhyun on the other hand had trouble cleaning up after himself).

“I’ll burp him when you’re done,” Baekhyun comes into the living room and sits next to Chanyeol.

“I told you I had it. You need to sleep,” Chanyeol counters.

Baekhyun is still half asleep at the current moment. As Chanyeol continues to feed the baby he notices Baekhyun’s head falling back from his drowsiness.

“I’m fine,” Baekhyun mumbles back when he snaps out of his daze.

It’s obvious that Baekhyun’s lying. He had got off of work at 12:30am and he had to pick up the baby from the sitter’s house and then get the baby ready for bed. He went to bed a little after 2am because he had to do last minute studying. Even now he’s not sure if he’s going to pass the final because his packed schedule didn’t allow him to study much.

Heojun finishes his bottle and Chanyeol lets Baekhyun take him. The baby doesn’t really need to be burped but Baekhyun still takes him so he can get Heojun back to sleep. He hugs his son and massages the baby’s back with his hand. Heojun lets out a deep breath and lays his head down on Baekhyun’s shoulder.

They sit in silence. The only noise in the apartment is the sound from the humidifier and Baekhyun’s light hums.

Chanyeol glances around the apartment. There’s baby toys and products scattered all around the coffee table along with a couple of fallen over Starbucks coffee cups. The floors aren’t the cleanest from the lack of care, there’s books scattered around the small desk in the living room along with unpaid bills, and the sink is piled up with baby bottles. He takes note to clean up as soon as his schedule is open, Baekhyun would appreciate it.

“Was it always this hard for you?” Chanyeol finally has the guts to ask the question.

He wanted to ask the question the other day when he caught Baekhyun crying in the nursery. Baekhyun’s excuse was he started watching a sad movie on his phone, Chanyeol knew that Baekhyun cut streaming on his phone plan because it was too expensive. 

Baekhyun hasn’t been the same or himself. Chanyeol didn’t notice before because when he and Baekhyun did meet up with each other, Baekhyun would have a huge smile on his face and he would happily talk about the baby or his day. At home, Baekhyun only smiled when he was with the baby. Other than that he moped around a lot and cried over too much stress.

“It wasn’t at first,” Baekhyun hangs his head low. His overgrown bangs covered his teary eyes. Chanyeol could only tell Baekhyun was crying when a tear drop fell from his nose. “But I made a promise.”

“Promise or not you’re letting your mental and physical health deter, Baekhyun.” Chanyeol warns. He doesn’t want to sound harsh but it’s true, Baekhyun isn’t himself. There’s always eye bags under his eyes, he’s been crying this whole week, and his weight dropped dramatically. “I don’t like seeing you like this Baek. You have to find some compromise.”

“Chanyeol,” Baekhyun chokes out. “This is the only compromise I can have if I want Heojun to grow up healthy. I made a promise to raise him well and I will keep that promise. Even if it means I have to sacrifice everything…”

Baekhyun wanted to continue talking but he couldn’t find his words anymore. The tears wouldn’t stop falling and he felt himself break for the umpteenth time.

Chanyeol immediately pulls Baekhyun in for a hug that does not interfere with him holding the baby. Baekhyun cries out all his frustrations and sadness while Chanyeol rubbed circles on the elders back, telling him that everything would be alright.

Everything was fine last year when Baekhyun’s best friend, Jieun, announced that she was pregnant. Baekhyun was ecstatic. He talked endlessly how he was going to be a great uncle to her baby. He especially liked telling it off to their classmates in their theater class. Jieun always rolled her eyes at Baekhyun’s bragging but she knew he would be a great uncle too.

It started getting rocky when the guy who got Jieun pregnant wanted nothing to do with her or the baby. Jieun’s parents were highly upset about her premarital pregnancy and said they never want to look at her again.

She was heartbroken and cried and cried and cried, but Baekhyun was always the one by her side through thick and thin. He promised her that he’d look after her and the baby.

Baekhyun took on his first job and was more than happy to work. It was a job at a convenience store with a flexible schedule that would let him look after Jieun and continue attending all of his college courses. It was great. Baekhyun was able to balance everything out, he was happy.

It all went south when Jieun’s water broke a few weeks earlier than her due date. They were both excited about it, Heojun (the name they picked out for the baby) was finally arriving. Jieun even spoke about how she was going to get a job as soon as possible so they could both raise Heojun well.

Her labor went on for nearly 26 hours. Baekhyun was instructed to wait in the waiting room for updates. The only time he left the waiting room was to use the bathroom once. He couldn’t eat because he was so anxious and excited.

On January 24^th, Heojun was born.

But Jieun didn’t make it.

Baekhyun didn’t talk to anyone for a whole month. All he did was mourn and take care of Heojun. He had promised Jieun he would take care of the baby and he was going to keep that promise. It was bittersweet. This beautiful baby boy was born, but his best friend was gone.

It wasn’t hard to become the baby’s legal guardian. What was hard was him dropping out of college in order to get another job to pay for the baby’s and his own expenses. What was hard was trying to take care of the baby while he handled two jobs. It was especially hard to apply to accounting classes online, only a month after dropping out. His passion was in the performing arts but the money to support Heojun was in business.

Ever since it’s been hard. The only thing that makes him happy is Heojun. Heojun is Baekhyun’s little spark of light, the reason he’s been holding on. Baekhyun’s watched Heojun grow and he feels like the baby is his own. Heojun is the reason why Baekhyun smiles.

Chanyeol lets go of Baekhyun once Baekhyun’s crying subsides. He takes his thumb and wipes the excess tears off of Baekhyun’s cheek.

“Sorry,” Baekhyun sniffles.

“This is going to stop,” Chanyeol comes to a decision. Baekhyun gives him a questioning look but before he can say anything Chanyeol continues. “I don’t like seeing you like this, and I want you and Heojun to be happy.”

“I want to help out with the baby.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Baekhyun scoffs.

“Am I being ridiculous?” Chanyeol questions. “I want to help you raise Heojun. I know you made a promise to take care of him but where in the rule book does it say I can’t help? You need as much help as you can possibly get and I don’t want to see you breakdown like this again. Just let me help.”

Baekhyun looks Chanyeol in the eyes and they don’t say anything to each other. Baekhyun breaks the glance to look at Heojun. Despite his crying and them talking the baby fell asleep. He only wants the best for him.

“Just give this a chance, for Heojun’s sake and your own,” Chanyeol places his hand on Baekhyun’s shoulder.

“It’s not going to be easy.”

“Of course it’s not, raising a child alone isn’t easy. But raising a child together will be a little less stressful. My job pays a good amount and I will be more than happy to help you out. We’re best friends and I don’t want anything bad to happen to you or the baby.”

Baekhyun’s tearing up again, this time out of happiness. It’s been awhile since someone has done something this nice for him.   

Baekhyun smiles his first genuine smile after five long months. It makes Chanyeol’s heart warm.

Baekhyun grabs Chanyeol’s hand and gives it a little squeeze.

“Are you sure you want to raise this baby with me?” Baekhyun asks.

“It would be an honor to raise this bundle of joy with you,” Chanyeol smiles back.

One sleepless night led to a lot of memorable nights that came with raising a baby together. Chanyeol didn’t get to see the final results of the renovations, but what he has is far more precious. He has a best friend, and they both have a healthy baby boy to raise.