I trust you.

　

Sehun and Luhan have always loved each others company. They were in the same age and they understood each other. They always missed the other ones company. When they were together, they were always forced to sneak around because Luhan's father didn't allow him to be with Sehun because Sehun was from Korea.

It made Luhan angry. He always used to ask his father why he can't be with Sehun and he always got the same answer. "Luhan, you have to understand that China and Korea are at war and Sehun is Korean, he can hurt you" Luhan didn't understand his father. Just because Sehun is Korean doesn't mean that he will harm him. Sehun loved him, he has always protected him, he promised to always protect him.

One day, Luhan sneak out to be with Sehun. They have always wanted to be pilots and to fight for China. Sehun stole his step-father's airplane. Sehun's step-father was a pilot and fought for China once, but he got injured many times, and now he was just an alcoholic. He abused Sehun and his mother daily. Sometimes he abused them because they were Koreans and sometimes he was just drunk. Sehun's mother died when Sehun was 8 because of all the abuse and now the only family Sehun has left is his step-father. He has never met his real father. He didn't even know if he was alive, he never asked his mother. The only thing he knew was that his mother fled from Korea when he was 2 years old and then she married his step-father.

Luhan looked at the airplane. It was huge.

"Can you fly it" Luhan looked at Sehun who was now sitting in the front way. He was unsure if he wanted to step on it.

"Luhan do you trust me" Luhan remembered what his father said. "Luhan never trust Koreans". But Luhan trusted Sehun.

Luhan swallowed and nodded.

"Then come on".

Luhan was still unsure if he should get on the airplane or not, but he stepped on it and sat behind Sehun. Sehun looked at him.

"The belt on" Luhan looked around to find the belt. He found it at his left arm and put it on.

He felt that the airplane was moving. Suddenly he heard Sehun screaming.

"WE ARE GOING UP NOW" Luhan who tried to be as calm as possible panicked.

He wanted to scream and ask Sehun to land again but he saw how much Sehun loved to be in the air so he closed his eyes and tried to stay calm.

After a moment, the panic began to go over and just when he was about to open his eyes, he heard Sehun screaming.

"LUUUUUHAAAAAAN I THINK WE'RE GOING TO CRASH" All you could hear now was just screaming.

Luhan who screamed because he was afraid of dying and Sehun who screamed because he couldn't control the airplane.
Sehun pressed on every button and pulled the levers. They went up and down, back and forth, left and right. He didn't know how to land. Luhan who was almost crying in the backseat started to talk to him.

"Sehun calm down, you can land by pulling the lever you pulled in when you went up, slowly" Sehun did as he said.

Slowly the airplane went down. Both were impressed when the airplane landed. Luhan was shocked because he guessed when he said it. He has never been on an airplane.

When they jumped out of the airplane Luhan went to a corner and started vomiting. He would never go on an airplane, ever again.

He could hear Sehun's laughter.

"We should do that again".

NEVER Luhan thought.

"No, never again" he said while wiping his mouth with his shirt.

Suddenly Luhan saw the person he didn't want to see right now. His father. He knew he was in trouble now. He had promised his father to never be with Sehun again.
Sehun looked behind him and saw Luhan's father. He knew everything. He knew Luhan's father didn't allow him to be with Sehun. Actually he hated him because he abused Luhan sometimes. He beat Luhan when he didn't obey him or when he lied to him. He knew now that Luhan would be beaten. He looked at Luhan and saw the fear in his face.

"Luhan let's go home" Sehun hated his voice too.

Luhan ran past Sehun and went to his father. His father took his arm. Sehun could see how hard he was holding Luhan's arm. It must've hurt because Luhan is so small.

*

Sehun himself have never lived a happy life. He was abused almost every day by his step-father. The only time he wasn't abused was when he didn't come home. Ever since his mother died, the abusing got worse. His step-father hated him. Sometimes he blamed everything on Sehun. He said he was the reason his mother died. Sometimes Sehun got beaten so much that he vomited blood and fainted. He could be gone for hours, and when he woke up again, he was only beaten more. He never got food. The only times he ate was when he stole his step-father's food, or when Luhan gave him food. When his step-father couldn't find his food, Sehun was beaten with the belt. He never dared to take off his clothes. Every time he bathed with Luhan, he has always clothes on and when Luhan asked him why he has clothes on, he replied that he feels uncomfortable without clothes, which he did.

Sehun have never had the courage to open up to Luhan. He wanted to tell him everything but he couldn't. He didn't want him to feel sorry for him or feel obliged to protect Sehun from his step-father. He didn't want to lose the only person that mattered to him.

When Sehun turned 16 years old, is when everything changed. Abusing was not enough for his step-father. Sehun only got better looking as he grow up and somehow he attracted his step-father.

One night when Sehun was sleeping, he felt someone crept into the mattress with him. He was too afraid to look, but knew who it was. He smelled liquor and cigarettes. Sehun bet his shirt while a hand pulled down his pants. The man's disgusting breath was hitting Sehun's neck. Sehun bet his shirt even more. He wanted to hit him, but he knew that he wasn't strong enough. Something cold touched Sehun's . Tears filled his eyes. He wanted to die. He thought rather die then having him inside me. The man took in his hand and began to touch it around Sehun's opening. He started to become hard and Sehun felt it. At that point Sehun felt sick. He began to hit on the man's chest with his elbows. The man put his arm around Sehun's body so that he couldn't move. Sehun fought him but after a while he got tired. The man was big and he knew he had no chance against him.

The man left him hours later, he left Sehun, crying in his mattress. He wept in pain all night.

His step-father never stopped. Sometimes he would just lay down next to Sehun and insert his finger in his . Sehun wanted to tell Luhan but his step-father threatened him. The pain was intense and everynight he cried in silence. Sometimes when Sehun wanted to shower he would ask him if he could join. As much as Sehun wanted to say no he couldn't, he was scared that he would beat him to death.

*

Luhan was on the fence that went around the farm outside the village. Sehun was walking beside him and was looking at him. He admired Luhan. Luhan was beautiful. All the girls in the village were always after him.

He always felt weird around Luhan. He felt something he couldn't explain in words. Sometimes he became jealous when he saw Luhan with girls. "You're jealous because he is your friend and you don't want him to leave you" he said to himself all the time. He felt something that grew bigger and bigger each time he met Luhan.

"Have you slept last night, you look tired" Luhan said laughing.

Sehun tried to force himself to laugh. He didn't want to think about last night.

"It's not easy to sleep when the dogs won't shut up".

Luhan nodded in agreement. He knew what Sehun was talking about. The dogs bark all night long.

*

"How did you know that you loved my mother" Sehun asked his step-father who was watching TV. He had a bottle of beer in his hand. Sehun have never had a normal conservation with his step-father. Between them, it was only abuse and or having with someone you care about is what his stepfather called it.

"I have never loved your mother".

Sehun looked out the window and saw Luhan who was playing with his little cousins.

"Have you ever loved someone?".

His stepfather looked thoughtfully at him.

"Why are you asking me questions today?".

Sehun shrugged his shoulders and continued to stare at Luhan. He liked Luhan's smile. Sehun was now smiling and he didn't even know.

There was silence between them for a few minutes.

"I have loved someone once, but she left me a long time ago" Sehun listened to him as he watched Luhan who was now getting chased by his cousins.

"I knew I loved her the day she became my happiness, she made me smile no matter how crappy I was feeling. When I heard her name, I was always smiling, I couldn't be without her. I loved everything about her. I loved her smile, her laughter, everything. She was my drug long before I started taking these drugs. I ... " the man stopped talking.

Sehun turned around and looked at him.

He saw his step-father who has always been so emotionless and cold, wipe away a tear.

"I could take a bullet for her" he continued.

Sehun was surprised. He couldn't believe that someone so cold and so numb have ever loved someone.

"Wha...what happened" Sehun stuttered.

The man took a swig from the bottle he had in his hand.

"I beat her".

Sehun expected that answer.

The man took another swig from the bottle and then threw it on the wall. Sehun knew he was in a bad mood now so he left the house.

*

Luhan have really never liked his family members. They were all mean to Sehun, treated him like he was some dangerous animal. His mother was the only one who liked him. Everytime we was worried about Sehun he asked his mother for edvice and they always helped.

Luhan saw Sehun who was walking out of the village.

"Okay, I'm tired now, go home okay? I'll play with you later" Luhan smiled at his cousins ​​in the hope that they would run home and they did. He looked at them and saw that they walked into the house, then he ran after Sehun.

*

"SEHUN?".

Sehun heard Luhan's voice and stopped at once. He saw Luhan running towards him. He just wanted to hug him and cry in his arms.

When Luhan arrived, he was breathless.

"Whe..where are you going" Luhan managed to say.

Sehun's heart stopped for a second.

"Do you trust me?" He asked and walked closer to Luhan.

"I remember the last time I trusted you, we almost died" Luhan laughed.

"Luhan, I mean it, do you trust me?".

Luhan raised his eyebrow.

"You're scaring me, but I've always trusted you".

To hear Luhan say that he has always trusted him made Sehun happy.

"Follow me" Sehun took Luhan's hand and started running.

Luhan who was still tired after all the running began to whine.

"SEHUN CAN WE ATLEAST WALK, PLEASE I'M GOING TO FAINT" Sehun just ran and pulled him along.

They came to a large field. The ground was wet and there was standing big hill of hay everywhere.

"What is this, I have never seen this place" Luhan was amazed by how big the place was.

"I found this place last year" Sehun looked at Luhan and saw how he was studying the place.

Sehun found the place one night when he was by his step-father and ran away. He was crying and didn't know where to go and suddenly he was just there.

"Okay Luhan come with me" he reached out his hand after Luhan's hand. Luhan hesitated a bit, but he took his hand.

They went to a hay hill and stood in front of it.

"Why are we standing here".

"Stand there and look straight in front of you, have your back against the hay hill" Luhan did as Sehun said.

"And then?" Luhan asked.

"Do you trust me?".

Luhan looked at him.

"Seriously why do you always ask if I trust you. I do trust you".

"Be still".

Luhan got worried.

"Sehun I'm afraid, is it now we'll get run over by a tractor?".

Sehun laughed. He opened one eye and looked at him

"I don't hate you so much and you said you trusted me so be quiet, look in front of you and close your eyes."

Luhan obeyed him. Suddenly, the wind got strong and came closer and the closer it came, the stronger it became. Luhan could hear the sound of war airplanes. He wanted to open his eyes, but he didn't dare. Suddenly the wind got so strong that Luhan was blown away. He started screaming, and suddenly he was inside a hay hill. The airplane noise disappeared, and now he could hear his heartbeat.

With eyes closed, he took himself out of the hay hill. He opened his eyes and looked around him. He couldn't see Sehun. He started to scream his name.

There was silence for a few seconds then he heard his laughter.

"Sehun come out and explain what just happened".

He looked around and saw Sehun coming out of a hay hill. He was still laughing.

"We should do that again".

Sehun removed the hay he got in his hair.

Luhan was angry and started chasing him around. According to Luhan what they just did was dangerous.

"When we were 14 I trusted you and we almost died, now we are 17 and I trusted you and we almost died, again".

Sehun couldn't keep himself from laughing.

"But you didn't die" he said between his laughs.

They chased each other around and threw goo at each other, after a while they started to walk home.

　

"Did you come out just to be blown away by an airplane" Luhan asked when they almost got home.

Sehun stopped.

It's time.

"I came out to think".

Luhan stopped and looked at him.

"Think about what?".

"Love".

Luhan got curious.

"Love? Why? Do you love someone?" Luhan walked towards him.

Sehun nodded and smiled.

Finally he knew what he was feeling for Luhan. He loved him. Luhan made him happy, he cared about Luhan more than his own life. He didn't want to live without Luhan. He couldn't live without him.

"Do I know her?".

Her?.

Sehun was quite for a while. "Her" was still running around his head. Just because he is a guy everyone is expecting him to fall for a girl. For a moment he didn't want to confess to Luhan because he likes girls and would probably reject him.

"Her?" Sehun laughed weakly. "It's not a her Luhan, it's a him".

Luhan didn't know what to say. He stared at Sehun hoping that he would continue talking but Sehun came closer to him. The sun was going down and the yellow color matched Sehun's eyes. It was only a few centimeters between them. Suddenly he saw how Sehun's eyes were filled with tears. A tear escaped from his eye, down to his cheek.

"Wh..why are you crying" Luhan's voice was shaky. He didn't even know why.

"Luhan...." Sehun began.

Luhan said nothing, he was just staring at him.

"You are the only person who ever cared about me...".

"That's not true, you have your step-father, you have told me how much he cares about you".

Luhan interrupted him.

"No Luhan, let me talk" Sehun became serious.

"You make me happy. I always have a smile on my lips when I'm with you. As long as I can remember I have always felt weird around you, I feel something for you that just keeps growing inside me. And I didn't know what it was until today".

Luhan felt that his cheeks were wet and something salty was on his lips.

"Luhan, I ...."

"No Sehun, I have to go".

Luhan ran away, he was crying and had anxiety but it was for the best. For both him and Sehun.

　

It had been days, weeks and even months. Luhan was gone. Sehun haven't seen him since that night when he tried to tell him that he loved him. Sehun knew why Luhan ran away. Luhan likes girls and he tried to tell him that he loved him more than just friends. He thought he had scared him away. Now all he wanted was to apologize to him and get his best friend back. He looked for him every day in all the places they have been to. The cottage by the beach, in the farm, the old garage outside of the village, in every place. Luhan was gone. For awhile, he thought that Luhan had moved away but Sehun saw his family several times.

*

"SEHUN?".

Sehun jumped up from his mattress and pressed his back against the cold wall. He knew what his step-father wanted. But Sehun had decided to put a stop to it. He didn't want to be used anymore.

His broken door flew open and there he was. Drunk as usual.

"Take off your clothes" he closed the door.

Sehun hugged his sweater.

"No".

"No?" the man repeated.

"I said no, you're not going to use me anymore".

The man slapped Sehun. Sehun's face got red and swollen at once.

"DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM" The man was screaming in Sehun's face.

"I raised you and you will obey me, you'll do exactly as I say or I'll kill you".

That's exacly what Sehun wanted. He wanted to die. There was nothing left for him in this world.

Sehun could swear that the neighbors were outside and wondered what was happening when the man threw him against the wall.

"I said, take off your clothes!".

Sehun was not going to give up tonight, he have had enough. One of them was going to die tonigth and he didn't care who it was. He was tired of his life. He has ever loved one person in this world, and he abandoned him, so there was nothing for him to live for.

Sehun stood up and began to take off his sweater. The man sat down on his mattress. When Sehun saw it, he ran out of the door and toward the kitchen. The man ran after him.

When he came into the kitchen, he began to look for something but before he could find it the man came and threw him into the wall. Sehun didn't feel that much pain because he was used to the pain. Both physical and mental.

Sehun saw what he was looking for. His only way out of this terrible life.

"Who do you think you are boy?" The man picked him up and held him against the wall.

"You are only 18 years old, do you really think you can take me? Huh boy?".

Sehun kicked the man in the stomach which caused him to drop Sehun. He stood up quickly and ran toward the knife. When the man turned around, Sehun ran against him and put the knife in his chest, 2 centimeters from his heart.

Sehun panicked. There were blood everywhere, on the floor and on him. He threw the knife at the man's body and ran out of the house.

*

Everyone, almost everyone stood outside their houses and wondered what was going on. When Sehun came out, he was shocked by all the faces. He stayed for a few seconds and looked at them all. He looked toward Luhan's house and saw that his entire family plus Luhan himself was ouside. Everyone stared at Sehun because there was blood all over him.

He was scared, scared of what they might do to him so he ran.

He didn't know where he was going. He only knew that he wanted to get out of this village.

He arrived at the beach and saw the old cottage he and Luhan found when they were younger. He walked toward it and sat on the stairs.

He couldn't believe it, he had killed his step-father. He started crying because now he was alone. He had exactly no one.

"Sehun...".

He felt how someone stabbed his heart with a knife over and over again.

Luhan came closer him.

"Sehun... are you okay?".

Sehun laughed as he cried.

"Let's see, I've never seen my real father, my mother married a freak, he beat us every day. My mother died because of all the beating when I was 8 years old. She left me with him. I got a friend but his father didn't allow him to be with me because I'm Korean. My step-father hates me. When I turned 16 he started to and use me as his wife. I fell in love with my friend and tried to confess it to him, but he left me and avoided me for months, and ever since then, I've felt lonely and empty. My step-father tried to use me tonight but I refused and killed him, everyone in the village saw me all bloody and they have probably found my step-father's body and they think I'm a murder which I am. Now I'm sitting here all bloody and my friend that I fell in love with that avoided me for several months is standing in front of me and asking how I'm doing".

He was quiet for a moment. He looked at Luhan and saw that he was sitting in the sand.

"I'm fine, thanks for asking" he looked at his bloody hands.

Luhan stood up and sat down in front of him. He could barely walk.

"Sehun, I know you hate me, but please listen to me and let me explain why I did what I did."

Sehun looked up at Luhan, their faces were close.

"When I was 14, I noticed that I was different, I wasn't attracted to girls or guys but as soon as I was with you, I felt how the pulse began to increase, and how I got. I thought that I liked guys, but when I was with other guys, I wasn't attracted. I was just attracted to you. Then I fell in love with you and I wanted you so damn much, but I was afraid you would reject me. I couldn't stop thinking about you, I was happy as soon as I saw you. I could sit and smile to myself as I thought about you. When I turned 16, I decided to confess to you. I also decided to tell my father because he was the only one who stood in the way. Then one night I sat down and told him everything".

Sehun was listening.

"I told him that I sneaked out with you behind his back. I told him that you made me happy and that I loved you more than just a friend. I told him how much I wanted to be with you and how wonderful you were. For a while I thought he would let me be with you but the first thing he did was slap me. He beat me so much that I could hardly walk for several days. When he was finished with me he threaten you and it was then I decided not to tell you because my dad promised he would take your life if he saw me with you again. That is why we can only meet outside the village and the reason why I ran away that night was because I was afraid I would lose you if we were together".

Sehun's hands were around Luhan's neck now. He put his lips on Luhan's. His tongue was flying around in Luhan's mouth. They were hungry for one another. They would've never stopped kissing if they didn't need air.

Sehun stood up and Luhan followed. He walked backwards and went into the cottage. Luhan bushed him backwards so that his back ended up against the wooden wall. Their hands flew around. Touched what they could touch and grabbed what they could grab. Sehun kissed him everywhere. Luhan wanted to give his all to him. He started ing his shirt. Sehun helped him and opened his pants. They were hard now.

"Sehun, you're bloody" They looked on Sehun's chest.

"Then let's do it in the shower" Sehun took his hand and brought him to the bathroom.

Luhan locked the door while Sehun the shower. He studied Sehun's body. The amount of scars on his body was hard to count. He hugged him from behind and put his chin on his shoulder. Sehun planted a kiss on his neck.

"I can't believe he did this to you".

Sehun hugged his arms.

"He's gone now".

They closed their eyes and stood like that for a moment.

Luhan's hard member was touching Sehun's .

"I want you Luhan" he whispered.

"Then have me, I'm all yours".

Sehun turned around and kissed him. Luhan ed his pants.

"I'm ready if you are" Sehun knew this was Luhan's first time. He rested his head on Luhan's forehead.

"I've never been more ready in my entire life".

Sehun took his hand and brought him into the tub. The hot water poured on them, from head to toe. They hugged each other. For a moment they never wanted to let go. If they died like that, they would be happiest. Sehun's tears were floowing automatic. He has been dreaming about this moment for so long.

When the blood was of his body Luhan turned off the water. He could kiss him everywhere now.

He started with his neck and just went further down. Sehun leaned his head back and closed his eyes. He began to moan. Luhan was good to be a beginner.
He stood on knees and started kissing Sehun's hard member. Sehun got a shock, a nice shock went through his body. They had just started but he already knew that he was going to soon.

"Luhan..".

Luhan looked up on him.

"Let me take care of you" Sehun looked down on him. Luhan's eyes were shining. They were so beautiful. Just like every inch of his face.

Luhan layed down in the bathtub and Sehun over him. Luhan's face was like an innocent little puppy.

Sehun stared him in the eyes.

"I'll make you scream my name".

Luhan closed his eyes, and he felt how Sehun started his neck. Sehun's arms creased his body. He kissed Luhan s and just went downhill. He looked at Luhan and saw that he was enjoying it.

Luhan felt Sehun, inserting himself into him and he clinged to him, wanting Sehun to have all of him. Luhan was so tight so Sehun forced himself in him. Tears escaped from Luhan's eyes.

Luhan moans as he feels Sehun moving slowly inside of him. He wanted Sehun inside of him since he was 14 years old and he waited four years before it happened. Sehun started moving faster and Luhan started his name just like Sehun told him he would. Sehun smiled When he heard his name. He was gentle and rough at the same time. Luhan es and finds his release while Sehun does it too, inside of him.

After they made love, they took a shower together. Lucky enough they found a bed in one of the rooms in the cottage, and they decided to spend the night there.

Luhan's head was on Sehun's chest. He touched slightly on some of his scars.

"Does it hurt?".

"A little" Sehun smiled. He felt Luhan's warm breath on his chest.

Luhan touched a scar that was bloody. Sehun moved a little because it hurt.

"That one is from tonight" he said.

Luhan layed down beside his head, facing him. Sehun moved away Luhan's hair that almost covered his eyes.

"I'm sorry for everything" Luhan said softly.

Sehun shook his head and smiled.

"Don't be, it wasn't your fault".

"But I never noticed anything, I am such a bad person".

Sehun covered Luhan's mouth with his hand.

"Hey, never say that again. You're not a bad person. In fact you are the most wonderful and kindest person I've ever met. You have shown me so much love, you've always cared about me, you were always there for me when I needed someone. You trust me even though I've almost killed you twice".

Luhan laughed when Sehun said that.

"You were there for me when everyone in the village turned their backs on me, so you're not a bad person Luhan. You will never be a bad person. I know that".

Everything was like a dream, a dream Luhan never wanted to wake up from.

"I love you".

There. The words Sehun was waiting for. He was desperate for them.

"I love you too".

Luhan slept on his chest again. They were quiet for nearly 30 minutes.

Both of them thought about what was going to happen tomorrow.

"Luhan..." Sehun broke the silence.

"Yeah" Luhan's voice was like a whisper.

"Do you promise to never leave me again".

Luhan felt the anxiety grow. He looked up at Sehun.

"I promise".

*

The next day came.

Sehun and Luhan was sitting on the stairs. None of them spoke. They didn't know what to say or do. They didn't know what was going to happen.

Luhan knew he had to go home but if he went home, he would probably be beaten and his father would force him to say where Sehun was and what they did but he would never reveal to anybody where Sehun was.

Sehun didn't know where to go. He had nowhere to stay or go. He had no one to stay with. He can't go back to the village, everyone would treat him as a murder and they would probably kill him. So both of them didn't know what to do.

"We can escape" Sehun suggested.

Escape?.

Luhan never thought about escaping but he couldn't escape, his father would find him and kill the two of them.

"My father will find us".

Sehun shook his head.

"China is so big, he will never find us".

Luhan thought about it again. Sehun had a point. His father would never find them. Suddenly escaping seemed to be a perfect idea for him.

"Okay, let's do it".

Sehun jumped up out of happiness.

"Let's do it at once" he pulled Luhan up.

"Sehun I have to go back".

Sehun's face expression changed quickly.

"Back?"

Luhan nodded.

"Why? If you go back, you will never come out again. Your father will kill you, he will never let you go again".

"No no, he will not kill me. I'm his son and I can sneak out tonight when they fall asleep".
Sehun still didn't understand him.

"Why do you have to go back?" Sehun couldn't let him go back to that horrible village.

"We need money, we have no car and food. We can't just escape".

Luhan had a point.

"I'm going to steal money from him so we can take a bus or something, I'll be back tonight".

Sehun didn't want to let go and let him in that village.

"You promised to never leave me again...".

Luhan hugged him tightly.

"I'll be back tonight, I promise".

Luhan promised and left Sehun, alone in the cottage.

*

The sun went down and Sehun was still sitting on the stairs. He trusted Luhan. He would come back.

The sun rose and Sehun was still sitting on the stairs. He trusted Luhan. He would come back.

It went three days. Sehun still waited for Luhan. He still trusted Luhan. He knew it wasn't easy to escape from Luhan's father so he didn't give up. He waited.

It went 5 days, it was then Sehun felt hungry. He thought of Luhan so much that he forgot to eat. He looked for food in the house but found nothing.

That night he decided to go back. God knows what they've done to Luhan.

When the sun went down, he ran back.

There was no one outside, just the dogs. Sehun looked at their house, it was still standing there. He walked slowly into the house. He felt the smell of alcohol. As usual.

He began to check his room, there was nobody in there, In his step-father's room, no one. He was afraid, the house was like a haunted house.

He went into the kitchen, there were no body on the floor so he asumed That they've burried him. The blood was stuck on the floor. He ran towards friger hoping that he would find food. He found beans and fruit. He began to heave in the beans and apples.

Suddenly someone came into the kitchen. Sehun dropped the jar of beans because of fear. He recognized the person.

It was Luhan's mother.

She wasn't scared at all. In fact, she smiled at him and walked closer to him.

"We've never met, I'm Luhan's mother" she said and held out her hand.

Sehun looked at it but didn't take it.

"Wha..what are you doing here" Sehun stattured.

"I was looking out of the window and I saw you walk in here".

She was kind compared to his father Sehun thought.

"Where is Luhan? Is he okay?".

She nodded.

"He is okay, but... he's not here".

Not here?.

Sehun got a lump in the stomach.

"Where is he" He was scared of her answer.

She sighed.

"When he came back from you his father was furious and he was beaten so much. That night he was locked in the basement and the next day he was sent to a military school".

Military school.

Sehuns legs were shaking. He sat down, thinking of what he ever did to god for punishing him this much.

Luhan's mother sat on her knees in front of him.

"Before Luhan left he asked me to visit you and tell you about it but I never got a chance. Luhan also told me everything about you and how much he loves you. You make him really happy Sehun".

Her eyes were filled with tears.

"I want my son to be happy and you seem to be the only person who can make him happy so if you want, I can drive you to the military school tomorrow and...".

Sehun jumped on her. He hugged her tightly. He loved this woman right now.
Luhan's mother laughed.

"But promise me one thing Sehun" she said between her laughs.

"Promise me that you will never break his heart because Luhan really loves you".

Sehun took her hand.

"I promise that I will never break your son's heart. I promise I will always love him, I promise to love him until my last breath. I promise to love him through thick and thin. I promise" Sehun kissed her hand.

*

The next day they met at the cabin.
On their way to military school, she told him everything about the military school. All the boys there were trained to be soldiers, and they would fight for China when they were ready. She told him about all the rules. You can't have a girlfriend there. If they see you with a girlfriend you'll get punishment.

"What about boyfriend" he asked. "Can you have a boyfriend?".

"You'll get worse punishment if they see you with a guy".

Sehun didn't care about it so much. As long as he was with Luhan, he didn't care.

She continued to tell him about the rules. Sehun thought they had strict rules but he didn't care. All that mattered was that he was with Luhan.

"Sehun you are Korean, they will never accept you" she looked at him with a sad face.

"Are you ready to give up your nationality for Luhan" she continued.

Sehun didn't hesitate with the words.

"I'm ready to give up my life for Luhan".

After several hours of ride they arrived at the school. It was amazing. Sehun saw men in groups in green uniforms. Major war planes and war chariots. This has been his dream.

"Sehun, let's sign you up, I have to leave you" Sehun nodded.

*

"What's your name, boy?" the man asked.

It took a while for Sehun to respond.

"Sh ... in Xuuun" His pronunciation was wrong.

The man looked at him.

"Don't you know how to pronounce your own name?".

Luhan's mother touched Sehun on the back. He looked at her.

"His name is Shi Xun, he is just nervous".

When they signed him up, he got a uniform and some guys guided him around. Luhan's mother had left him. He was really grateful for everything she had done for him.

The only thing Sehun wanted right now was to find Luhan and hug him. He have missed Luhan's laughter and smile. Most of all, he missed Luhan.

"You sleep here" one of the guys who guided Sehun pointed at a bed.

Sehun nodded.

They showed him all the places he should know but Sehun remembered none of it, wherever he went he was looking for Luhan.

"The boss is coming so we have to stand out there".

The guys who called themselves Yifan and Zitao took Sehun out and showed him how he would stand. He would have his hand on the forehead and straight in the back. He would not make eye contact with the boss and he would not talk without being told to, and he had to say "sir" everytime he talks.

When the boss came everyone stood in a long row. Sehun tried to peek occasionally to see the boss face. He was curious.

The boss approached Sehun and he stood there. He watched Sehun. Sehun tried his hardest not look at him.

"I don't recognize you" the boss said with a determined tone.

"I'm new sir, I came here today, sir" Sehun stared in the blank.

The boss walked backward 2 meters from Sehun.

"All those who are new, who arrived here this week step forward" he shouted.

Sehun took a small step forward. The boss looked at his left side.

"You, come here" he shouted to a guy who also stepped forward.

The guy walked up to the boss and continued to stare in the blank.

"What is your name?".

"Lu Han, sir".

Sehun could hear his heart explode. That voice, he had miss it. Sehun loved the way Luhan pronounced his name.

"And what is your" the boss looked at Sehun.

Sehun couldn't believe he was standing beside Luhan. He was overjoyed. He wanted to hug him and kiss him.

"WHAT'S YOUR NAME SOLDIER" the boss scream woke Sehun up.

"Oh Se .." Sehun stopped himself.

"Shi Xun sir".

The manager looked at them two.

"I want you to get to know each other, because you are pilot partners now, greet each other" he nodded to them.

They turned around slowly. When Luhan saw his face, he was shocked and happy. How could Sehun be here?.

Sehun however, merely smiled at Luhan.

*

After half an hour the boss left. He told them that they must train hard becauses it was time soon.

It was time to eat. Sehun and Luhan walked side by side. They pretended that they didn't knew each other. When everyone else went to the kitchen Sehun drug Luhan and they ran into one of the bedrooms.

Luhan was pushed in to the wall by Sehun and his lips were attacked by Sehun's. Their tongues was fighting. Sehun grabbed Luhans and lifted him up. Luhan's legs were now around Sehun's waist and his arms around his neck. They didn't stop kissing, not even for air. They were kissing like it was their last time.

Luhan stopped Sehun. He was breathless.

"Ho...how did you come here, ho..how did you kn...ow" Luhan managed to ask questions between his breaths.

Sehun squeezed his .

"Can we talk about it later, I've missed you so damn much".

Sehun snapped up Luhan's shirt, he was ready to make love with him but Luhan prevented him. If someone saw them, they would be punished.

After a while they went to the kitchen to eat. Their hair was a mess.

*

In the evening they were sitting outside and talking. Sehun told him how Luhan's mother had helped him. Luhan forgot that he asked his mother to tell Sehun.

"I was really scared when you didn't come back, I thought something had happened".

Luhan took his hand and hugged it. It was really cold.

"How long did you wait".

Sehun shook his shoulders.

"5 days maybe".

They talked all night about how much they had missed each other. Luhan told Sehun he cried all night when he was locked in the basement because he thought that his father had found Sehun and killed him. Sehun wanted to hug him and say that everything was fine now, but it was impossible because soldiers were sitting 30 meters away from them.

*

Sehun and Luhan became pilot partners. Sehun was a bit better than Luhan. He showed Luhan how he did it and how to controll the plane but it took a while before Luhan learned it.

Sehun impressed the boss. He had flown an airplane once in his entire life and he flew the plane as if he was born and grown up in one. The boss was proud of him. He asked Sehun to show everyone else how to fly. It made Sehun really happy because it was the first time someone was proud of something he did.

It had been months and Sehun and Luhan became skilful pilots. They became the boss's favorite pilots. It made them more than happy. They've always had people that underestimated them and people that abused them. They loved this school because here they could be together without Luhan's father beating him. Here they were able to laugh and have fun. The only time they had to sneak around was when they wanted to make love. The people here cared about them.

1 year later it was time. Time to send war planes because Korea was going to make a move.

Luhan was reading a book when Yixing asked him to go to the boss office. He was a little worried. He knew what it was about.

He knocked on the door when he arrived.

"Come in".

He took a deep breath before he opened the door.

"You called me sir" Luhan said when he went in.

The boss smiled at him. It scared him.

"Yes, close the door".

Luhan did as he said.

"How are you?" the kinder the boss was the more it scared Luhan.

"Good sir, how about you?".

"Good".

There was silence between them for a few seconds.

"I want you to fly out tomorrow".

Luhan's dream has always been to fight for China and when it was time to do that he didn't want to. It scared him.

"You're flying with Zitao".

Zitao.

"Sir my partner is Shi Xun".

The boss must have forgotten that Sehun is my partner Luhan thought.

"I know but Shi Xun is not flying out tomorrow".

Something smashed Luhan's heart. He didn't want to fly out without Sehun. His dream has always been to fly with him.

"You can go now".

Luhan bowed and walked back to his room.

*

In the evening he and Sehun was sitting and talking as they always did every evening. Luhan wasn't down on the earth though. He was thinking of how he was going to tell Sehun.

"I suffer with those who are flying out tomorrow, I hope they come back alive" Sehun said staring at the airplanes.

Luhan was also hoping that they would come back home alive tomorrow.

"Luhan"

No respons.

"Luhan" he called again.

Luhan looked at Sehun.

"What's wrong" Sehun asked.

Luhan still didn't know how to tell him.

"Nothing" he lied.

"No Luhan talk, I can see that something is wrong" Sehun turned around so that he faced Luhan.

Luhan took a deep breath.

"I'm flying out tomorrow".

He saw how quickly Sehun's face expression changed.

"What...." Sehun's voice was like a whisper.

Luhan sighed.

"I was with the boss today and he said that I'm going to fly out tomorrow with Zitao as my partner" Sehun stood up hastily.

"But I'm your partner, if you fly out then I fly out" Sehun's determined voice scared Luhan a little.

Sehun looked at the boss window and saw that his lamp was still on.

"Wait here" Sehun ran towards the boss office. Luhan stood up as he watched Sehun.

　

The boss door flew open and in went Sehun. He hit his fist on the table.

"I wanna fly out tomorrow" Sehun still had the determined tone.

The boss took off his glasses.

"Shi Xun good to see you".

"I'm Luhan's partner, if he flies out then I fly out aswell".

The boss laughed.

"Sehun you are my student, you do as I say and If I say that you're not flying out tomorrow, then you're not flying out tomorrow".

At that moment the boss reminded Sehun about his step-father. When he claimed that Sehun was his son and he would obey him.

"I'll fly with Luhan tomorrow or he'll fly out when I'm flying out".

The boss put down his glasses on the table. He saw that Sehun's fist was still on the table.

"Do you know why you were sepereraded into groups".

Sehun didn't really care.

"No" he asked.

The boss sighed.

"We don't even know if Korea is really making their move tomorrow so we're sending out a group and IF Korea attacks we're sending out the second group" he explained.

Sehun laughed in a sarcasm way.

"No, you mean you'll send us out when the others have died".

Sehun couldn't even imagine it. If Luhan flyed out tomorrow, there was a big chance that he wouldn't come back.

"Good, you understand me. Now you can try to understand that I can't send out my best pilot first".

Best pilot.

Sehun didn't really care if he was the best pilot. He wanted to protect Luhan.

"Why do you want to fly with Luhan so much" the boss was curious.

Sehun didn't answer. He didn't know what to say and he couldn't tell the truth.

"You know what".

Sehun looked at him.

"You're flying tomorrow with Luhan as your partner".

What?.

"Congratulations Shi Xun, you're flying out tomorrow." The boss changed the conversationen completely.

Sehun didn't understand. Just now, he was refusing to send him out tomorrow and now suddenly he is doing it. He didn't know if he should be happy or sad about it. He was probably glad that he was flying out with Luhan because now he could protect him.

When Sehun came back Luhan was still sitting where he left him. He was looking at Sehun with a pensive gaze.

"Tonight may be our last night and I want you so damn much". Sehun took Luhan's hand and they walked toward their airplane. Sehun who was the best pilot always had his flight keys on. He opened the plane and then he locked it. They covered the windows with curtains.

Sehun lifted him up easily and Luhan wrapped his legs around him. That was his favorite position while kissing Luhan. Sehun pushed him against the plane walls, lips still kissing him slowly, tenderly. Luhan thought about tomorrow as his hands wander around Sehun's hair. Tomorrow scared him. It frightened them both.

They always rush into things but now, Luhan feels like they're taking it slow. Savoring every press of his lips against his, every taste, every sensation. He wants to remember this night.

Sehun let him down after awhile. Luhan opened his eyes and looked at him. He is so beautiful Luhan thought. He has never seen something more beautiful.

Sehun embraced Luhan. He wanted to stand there forever. He wanted this to be an eternity. Luhan's heart beats were in the same rate as his. It felt like their hearts were having a conversation.

"What did I do to deserve you" Sehun's hot breath made Luhan to relax and close his eyes. He let out a breath.

"Tomorrow.." Luhan began.

Sehun released him and grabbed his cheeks.

"Let's worry about tomorrow, tomorrow, tonight..I want you".

Luhan nodded.

Tomorrow have always scared them. Ever since they were little, they have always been afraid of tomorrow. Is Sehun going to get beat up tomorrow, is he going to get tomorrow, is he going to meet Luhan tomorrow, Will Luhan be able to sneak out tomorrow, Is his father going to find them together tomorrow, Is Luhan leaving Sehun tomorrow, Will Sehun die tomorrow, Will they die tomorrow. Tomorrow has always been the first thing they always thought about.

"Come here" Luhan chukled. "It's my turn to take care of you tonight".

Luhan lifted up his shirt, and then he took it off. Sehun's body turned him on. He took off his shirt and Sehun was watching him, bitting his lower lip. Sehun pulled Luhan closer to him in a soft kiss. Luhan's hands travel down to . He could feel how hard it was.

He buttoned up his pants and began careasing Sehun's thight. Luhan could feel himself becoming harder and harder. Sehun watched as Luhan kneels down and his head dips and engulfs him and Sehun felt his tongue tasting every inch of him.

"Luhan.." Sehun starts but Luhan just continues to him.

Sehun's could almost be heard outside the airplane. It felt like his inside was on fire and the fire just grows stronger as Luhan faster.

"I..." Sehun was breathless. "I think .... I'm going to soon" Sehun closed his eyes tightly and presses himself against the wall. Luhan is full of surprises.

Luhan stood up and started kissing Sehun. This was his first time taking care of him, he wanted to leave a good first impressing.

Sehun shivered at the slightest touch Luhan was giving him. It felt like every scar Luhan touched was getting healed.

"How do you feel" Luhan asked while kissing him.

Sehun didn't know how he was feeling. He was feeling many things. He was feeling loved, , his inside was on fire. He was feeling sad because of his past. He was feeling healed and in love.

"I'm feeling many things" he managed to say, still eyes closed.

Luhan stops and Sehun opens his eyes, wondering why he stopped. He was swetting.

"Lay down" he whispered.

Sehun obeyed. He have always liked when Luhan told him to do things. He loves obeying him.

Sehun hisses as Luhan spreads him and inserts a finger inside him. He stopped when he sees Sehun's eyes crinkle in pain.

"Am I hurting you.." Luhan couldn't watch Sehun crinkle his eyes in pain. It made him sad somehow. "I hate it when you're in pain".

Sehun tells him to keep going. He can take the pain. Just as long as it's with him.

Luhan finally takes of his underwears and stands upove Sehun who was watching him. He wanted to feel Luhan.

Luhan kneels and slowly forces himself inside of Sehun. Once again Sehun's eyes crinkle in pain but this time Luuhan didn't stop. His s are slow and Sehun meets each with want and need. He wants to come so badly that his body aches for him.

They continued throughout the night. They didn't care if everyone was looking for them or if someone sees them.

When they were inside each other, it felt like they could feel the other ones pain. They wanted to heal each other.

When they were finished, they decided to sleep in the airplane.

　

They smiled next to one another and stared at each other's faces.

"If I could stop time, and be like this forever, I would" Luhan put his hand on Sehun's cheek and careased it sofly.

"You've been through so much, I can't help it but just hate myself when I think about it". A tear escaped from Luhan's eyes.

"Luhan stop, just...don't think about it, now is all that matters" Sehun whispered.

"How do you do it?".

"Do what?" Sehun asked.

"Deal with the pain.." Luhan whispered.

Sehun was quite for a while.

"There were nights I cried so hard that my body ached and I shaked and I had to put my head in my pillow so he wouldn't hear me. There were also nights I was happy even though I was in pain because I was happy that I had someone like you in my life who healed me. And there were nights I felt nothing at all. But there were never a night that you didn't cross my mind, whenever I wanted to give up I saw you and you told me to be strong".

They just kept staring at each other.

"So thanks to you..." He stopped talking and touched Luhan's lips with his fingers. "I stayed strong because of you".

Luhan wanted to protect him from now on because he failed in their past life.

"I'll protect you" Luhan was serious.

Sehun shook his head.

"You've protected me so many times, I'm so grateful that I have you, but now it's my turn to protect you".

Sehun didn't care if it costed him his life tomorrow, he was going to protect Luhan.

"Before, I wanted so badly to fight for China, I wanted to protect my country but now I'm scared" Luhan began.

"Why?" Sehun careased his cheek.

He was scared too. Tomorrow may be his last day.

"What if...what if one of us dies or both, we'll never see each other again".

Sehun was looking on the roof now.

"I wanna be the person that dies" Sehun said, still looking on the roof.

Luhan hit him on the arm and Sehun started laughing.

"I'm not living a life without you, ever again" Luhan hit him again.

Sehun nodded. Luhan layed on his back and was also looking on the roof.

"I wish we were normal".

Normal.

Sehun have really never lived a normal life.

"I mean normal like, you and me married, accepted and doing whatever married couples do" Luhan smiled just thinking about it.

Sehun looked at Luhan and Luhan looked at him.

"Is that what you want?" Sehun asked. "You and me married?".

Luhan nodded slowly.

Sehun sat up and looked around. Luhan did the same and was looking at him.

"what are you looking for?".

Sehun saw something and reached for it. Luhan was watching him, still wondering what he was doing.

"Luhan can you stand up" Luhan obeyed but he still didn't know what Sehun was doing.

Sehun kneeled down in front of him.

"Sehun, no.." Luhan understood what he was doing now.

"Luhan, I know this isn't a ring but..." both of them looked at the leaf Sehun was holding.

"It's still something" he continued.

"In my intire life, I've been abused by my step-father but you were always there to heal my scars. We've grown up together and took care of each other. For a while you were like a little brother for me that I wanted to protect, but that changed real quick.." they both laughed.

"I'm addicted to you, I love you and I..., I just wanna live with you for the rest of my life so...".

"YES" Luhan interuppted him.

Sehun laughed.

"Luhan I still wanna say those words" he laughed.

Luhan was watching him and waiting for him to say those words.

"Do you wanna...".

"YES! YES!" Luhan interuppted again.

Sehun took a deep breathe.

"Luhan..".

"BUT IT'S TAKING TOO LONG" Luhan sounded like a baby who was crying for a lollipop.

"Lu Han, do you wanna marry me and share your life with a freak without a family" Sehun stood up.

"I would marry you if you were blind or without legs and arms, as long as you're you, as long as you're Oh Sehun" he hugged him tighly.

After a while he released him.

"Where is my leaf" Luhan asked.

Sehun held it in front of his eyes and he took it.

"All I want is this leaf and you, nothing more".

He put the leaf in his pocket and kissed Sehun.

"Have I ever told you how much I love you?".

Sehun shook his head.

"I love you to the sun and back, I love you more than my own life, I love you more than air. If you took out all the air in my lungs and fillde them with you, I would be the happiest person in the world. I love no one else but you in this world, I've loved you since the first day I met you, I will always love you, I will love you until my last breath. I will love you inside the grave, I will love you no matter what, I will love you if you kill me, I will love you if you hate me, I will love you if you shut me out and leave me, I will always love you. I love you".

Luhan noticed that Sehun had tears in his eyes. He embraced him and pulled him closer. Held him tightly. Sehun wraped his arms around him.

"Promise?" Sehun managed to say.

"I promise, I promise to never stop loving you Sehun".

*

They were all standing in a row in front of their planes. Sehun and Luhan was standing next to each other.

"We don't know what's going to happen out there, but keep your eyes open and always be on your guard" the boss shouted.

"Yes sir" they all said in chorus.

Every soldier was in his airplane now. Sehun was on the front way and Luhan next to him. Luhan was afraid, his hands were swetting..

"It's going to be okay. I'm here" Sehun tried to calm him down.

Luhan nodded.

Sehun was unsure if he could protect Luhan but he would do anything to protect him.

The airplanes began to take off. Sehun started their plane and they were lifted up. They were told to fly carefully.

Luhan was looking in every possible direction, trying to see if Korea was in the air but nothing.

"Shi Xun come, do you see something" someone was heard in the walkie talkie.

Sehun picked it up quickly.

"Shi Xun here, no we don't see anyth..."

Shots were heard and one of their planes crashed. Luhan could see it.

"Sehun they're here".

Luhan held his chair tighly and closed his eyes.

"What do we do now?" He asked.

Sehun was also scared. He was terrified but he didn't show it.

"We attack".

Sehun turned around the airplane.

"Hey Luhan".

Luhan looked at him.

"Incase this is our last day, you should know that I really really really love you" if they died today, Sehun wanted those words to be the last thing he said to Luhan.

"I know, I love you too".

　

Korean airplanes was coming from all directions. Sehun and Luhan were lucky because they were good pilots because the Korean soldiers were amazing. They knew what they were doing.

Sehun attacked one of the Korean airplanes. He hit one of the wings and it went off which caused the plane to crash.

"They are too many" Luhan insisted.

Sehun couldn't answer, he was busy saving their lives. Many of the Chinese airplanes crashed.

"LUHAN ASK HENG LI TO SEND THE OTHER GROUP" Sehun shouted. His heart was beating so fast.

Luhan picked up the walkie talkie.

"HENG LI COME, SEND THE OTHER GROUP" Heng Li was their boss name.

But they got no respons.

"This is Luhan, send the oth...." Luhan dropped the walkie talkie. For a moment he thought that they crashed but they got hit on the roof.

"Sehun we're going to die" Luhan was terrified.

They got hit again, this time on the wing. Their plane started to go downhill.

"SEEHUUUN" Luhan screamed and held tight to his chair. He watched Sehun. He saw how he struggled with the lever. He pulled at it but nothing happened, the airplane just went downhill.

Sehun couldn't protect Luhan now, they were going to crash. How will he be able to protect him from that.

The airplane went into the woods. It just went on and all they saw was just trees. They were panicking. It went faster than a racingcar and suddenly they went into a big tree and everything became dark.

*

The sound of water woke Sehun up. Everything was blurry, but he could see that the light in the roof wobbled back and forth. He had headaches and felt the taste of blood.

He closed his eyes and opened them again. it took awhile before he could see better.

The room was like a slaughter house, old and creepy. The walls were brick and the door was of old wood.

Where am I?.

He saw Luhan who was sleeping in a corner. He was wearing only pants. It was blood on his body. Sehun followed the blood and saw that it was coming from his head.

He is freezing. Sehun thought.

"Luhan..." His voice sounded like a whisper that was impossible to hear.

Sehun tried to move closer to Luhan but he couldn't. Something stopped him. He could hear the sound of it.

Chains.

His feet were chained and so were his arms. He saw that Luhan were also chained.

"Luhan..." he shouted again. His voice was a little bit higher now.

He panicked. He thought he had died.

He promised to protect him.

Sehun heard footsteps. Someone was standing outside the door. He could hear the person put keys in the key hole.

A man came in. The man was big compared to Sehun and Luhan. He had the Korean soldier uniform.

"Good, you're awake" The man smiled at him.

He walked up to Luhan and stared at him.

Sehun got angry.

"Don't touch him".

The man kicked Luhan weakly.

"Wake up".

Sehun wanted to jump on the man and beat him.

The man took a bucket of water that was standing next to the door. He poured it over Luhan.
Luhan coughed and began to move. Sehun felt relief.

"Wake up sleepyhead" The man's voice disgusted Sehun. He was speaking chinese.

Sehun watched as Luhan opened his eyes. He smiled at him. Luhan was really hot when he was dirty.

"Up, you're coming with me" the man kicked Luhan again.

"NO" Sehun screamed. "He won't, I can go with you. Leave him alone" he continued.

Luhan was still laying down. He had no energy or strength. The man opened his chains then he went up to Sehun.

"You're coming with me too" he opened Sehun's chains.

Sehun crawled to Luhan as soon as the man opened his chains.

"Carry him and follow me" Sehun watched as the man walked out of the room.

"Se..Sehun..." Luhan's voice was weak.

"Shhh" Sehun careassed his cheek. "It's going to be okay".

"I said, follow me" the mans voice echoed in the room.

Sehun grabbed Luhan's arm and helped him up. Luhan was dizzy so he grabbed the wall.

"I can carry you" Sehun bent down, ready to lift him.

"No Sehun" he stopped him. "It's okay, I can walk" Luhan forced a smile.

They followed the man to a room full of Korean soldiers.

"They are here" the man said and went to someone who looked like their boss.

Sehun and Luhan was standing at the door. Luhan was holding Sehun shoulders because he was still dizzy.

The boss looked at them and studied them. Sehun stared at him while Luhan had his head down and eyes closed.

The boss said something in Korean and they all laughed. Sehun couldn't understand them. His korean was not good at all. The boss went closer to them.

"What is your name" His chinese was horrible.

Sehun didn't respond.

The manager went even more closer to them. He smiled and kicked Sehun in the stomach and he fell backwards and Luhan fell with him.

"I said what's your name" everyone in the room laughed, but Sehun still said nothing.

The manager went up to Luhan.

"NO, don't touch him, my name is Shi Xun" Sehun shouted.

The boss smiled.

"Shi Xun" he said and went back to his chair.

Sehun hated him already.

"What do you want from us?" he asked.

Everyone laughed at Sehun's question.

"You are my hostages, if China doesn't give up we will kill you" the boss said, laughing.

Hostage?.

Luhan doesn't deserve this Sehun thought.

"Release him, you can have me" Sehun said without thinking.

Luhan was looking at him, he wanted him to shut up.

What is he talking about? I will never leave you here.

"Nah, it's more fun with two".

*

Sehun and Luhan were beaten every day. Every day it was a different man. They were taken to a room full of other soldiers and they were beaten in front of everyone. They were taken back to their room when they were done.

One day they made Luhan watch while they were abusing Sehun. They hit him with their belt. Sehun was really strong. He didn't show any face expression. But Luhan knew he was in pain. The way they were hitting him, like he was a doll or something really must've hurt. Luhan looked away because he couldn't watch but they forced him, held his face with their hands and forced him to watch his husband get beat up. Sehun's eyes were red, it was blood all over his face and body. There were more new scars on his body. Luhan's tears were flowing. If he ever got the chance to kill these soldiers, he was going to start with the two that were abusing Sehun and then the man that forced him to watch.

Sehun thought that he would die soon. His whole life, he has been beaten but he never died, but perhaps this time it was time for him. There were moments he wished he would be beaten to death. He wanted to go away because he was tired of his life. But then he thought about Luhan. He didn't want to leave him.

　

"Luhan..." It took a while for Luhan to look at Sehun.

"I'm, ...I'm sorry".

"For what?" Luhan asked thoughtfully.

Sehun was quiete for a moment.

"For putting you in this hell" he began.

"Sehun...".

"No Luhan, everything is my fault. You were beaten by your father because of me, you were sent to military school because of me and now you are a hostage because I was a bad pilot" Sehun cried.

Luhan wanted to hug him.

"Sehun it was all worth it because as long as I'm with you, none of this matters".

Lies Sehun thought.

"Stop lying! If I was gone, your life would be much easier. Your father would never beat you. You would never feel attrackted to some freak and you would have a pretty girlfriend".

This was their first fights as a couple.

"Sehun shut up, without you my life is meaningless".

Sehun still didn't believe his words.

"Luhan remember when we were 12, you told me that you want a pretty girlfriend because you want pretty kids" Sehun was hitting the ground with his foot.

He blamed himself for eveything that was happening to Luhan.

"I was 12 and I don't care if you're not a pretty girl, I don't care if you're not going to give me pretty kids. I choose to be with you because I ing love you. Is that so hard to understand?".

Sehun was still hitting the ground.

"Sehun I love you, without you I'm nothing so stop wishing that you were gone because wherever you go. I'm going with you".

The door flew open and there stood the boss. He was smiling.

He walked up to Luhan and opened his chains.

Sehun sat up.

"No! leave him, take me. I'll do whatever you want, just leave him please".

The boss looked at him and smiled.

"Sure, why not" he went up to Sehun.

"NO SEHUN SHUT UP! Stop protecting me. I can protect myself" Luhan screamed at him.

The boss was laughing at them.

Luhan tried to stand up but he fell.

Sehun crawled to him.

"I love you, just trust me" he whispered.

The boss took Sehun in his hand and pulled him up. Luhan was holding his hand. He didn't want to release him.

"Let him go" the boss shouted.

Sehun looked at Luhan, his tears were floowing and so was Luhan's.

"Don't you dare leave me Oh Sehun" Luhan had a bad feeling.

"Luhan please, just trust me".

Luhan held him harder. For once he didn't trust Sehun.

The boss kicked his hand and Luhan released him.

He locked the door left Luhan screaming. He was screaming for Sehun, asking him to come back but nothing happened.

　

The boss brought Sehun to a room. Sehun was surprised when he didn't see the soldiers.

"Aren't the soldiers watching today" he asked.

The boss shook his head. He went closer to Sehun.

"Take off your pants"

No please.

For the first time in years, he was afraid for real. He didn't want to get again. His step-father was dead. He didn't want anyone else but Luhan inside of him.

Sehun went backward just to get away from him.

"I said take off your pants"

Sehun felt the cold wall against his back.

"I can take it off for you".

The boss kicked him in one foot so he fell. Sehun crawled and got sand in his nails. He wanted to get away from him. He crept toward a corner.

"Please kill me, just...." Sehun's tears were floowing. "..don't me".

The boss pulled him in the foot and then he pulled off his pants.

Sehun was laying on the muddy ground, . The cold air made him cringed.

The boss took off his pants and pulled Sehun out from the corner. was big.

Sehun's life really confused him. He never understood why all of this was happening to him. Why him?. He didn't really wish someone else his life though.

The boss was standing upove Sehun. He kneeled and inserted inside of him.

Sehun felt it. He felt force himself into him. Everything Sehun could think of was his step-father and the first time he him. Sehun couldn't believe he called him father when he was younger. He treated him like he wasn't worth living. Sometimes Sehun actually thought about it. Maybe he wasn't worth this live, or Luhan.

Sehun's tears were floowing even more as he thought about Luhan. All he ever wanted was to give Luhan a happy life.

But he failed.

*

Luhan smiled on the ground, crying. He hated Sehun because he was so stubborn. He was going to kill him when he comes back. Suddenly, someone banged on the door. Luhan jumped up. They hit the door with something hard and it opened.

Two men came in. Luhan recognized them.

Yifan and Yixing.

"Luhan come quickly" They pulled him out of the room.

"We have to save Shi Xun" Luhan tried to get loose Yifan but he wasn't strong enough.

"LUHAN RUN, WE DON'T HAVE TIME" Yixing screamed and Yifan held Luhan harder.

"NO!" Luhan came loose Yifan's grip. He ran to the room they used to be but Sehun wasn't there. It was just dead soldiers.

Luhan was crying.

Where is he? Where are you Sehun?.

"I'M NOT LEAVING WITHOUT SHI XUN" he wept.

Yifan grabbed his arm. Luhan fought him. He kicked him just to get loose.

"WHERE IS SEHUN! I WANT SEHUN! RELEASE ME!!" Luhan was crying.

"LUHAN DO YOU WANNA DIE" Yifan screamed.

"I'D RATHER DIE THEN LEAVE HIM" Luhan was still fighting him.

His tears were flowing and all he wanted was Sehun. He wanted to hug him and kiss him. He wanted to tell him how much he loves him and how much he means to him. He wanted Sehun to know that the day he came into his life was the best day ever. Luhan didn't want a pretty girlfriend. He didn't want kids. All he wanted was to spend the rest of his life with Sehun. This time he wouldn't let anything come between them. He was going to kill anyone that ever tried to harm Sehun or him. He wanted to take care of Sehun and protect him. He wanted his husband. Sehun belongs to him.

"You don't understand...." Luhan started to run out of energy.

"I love Sehun..." everything became dark for Luhan and he fell on the muddy ground.

*

Luhan woke up by headache. It felt like someone hit his head with a hammer.

There were beds everywhere and wounded men in the room. Luhan saw someone sitting in front of him. It was just a figure at first.

"Seh..un.." his voice was too weak and shaky.

"Luhan..." the figure came closer to him. He saw that it was Yixing.

"I'm sorry...he is gone".

Luhan was feeling of total devastation. Sehun was dead and there was nothing left. All he had ever wanted was gone. For him love is the most beautiful thing in the world, but now, love was like hell for him. He couldn't explain what he was feeling. He felt like he couldn't breath. Everything in the room was spinning around and Yixing was just disappearing. Life was pointless for him now. He was wondering why he had to lose that one thing he loved most.

It wasn't really a pain he was feleling, it was a cold empty feeling. it kind of felt like nothingness, like a slow kind of pain in his chest, like it just kind of inflated and it's holding his breath, He didn't wanna breathe because it felt wrong when Sehun wasn't breathing.

He felt how everything around and inside of him was kind of crashing down, and he didn't feel like doing anything, moving a finger or blinking because he didn't wanna believe it.

"Luhan..".

Luhan could hear people talk to him everyday. He saw them. But he couldn't move or talk to them.

Yixing told him about when they found Sehun. He told him that they found him in a room and a man was sitting beside him. He had a gun in his hand and was laughing. Yifan held his gun on the man and the man just kept on laughing. When Yixing asked why the man was laughing he just laughed more and said "Did you know that this guy and the other one are married". Yixing said that they didn't believe it at first but before Yifan shoot the man he asked him how he knew that and the man said "When I heard you coming I wanted to shoot him so I asked if he had some last words and he said I love you Luhan, and I asked what he was talking about then he said they're here to rescue my husband".

Luhan's tears were floowing. Yixing just kept on talking. Luhan couldn't say anything.

"Luhan, were you and Shi Xun really married?".

Yes.

"I know you can't answer me but if Shi Xun's last words were I love you Luhan, then he must've really loved you".

Luhan closed his eyes, that was the only thing he could do.

He saw Sehun when he closed his eyes. His face was something you couldn't put in words. Beautiful was not even the word for it. It was way more than just beautiful. Luhan thought he was dreaming but he wasn't because he could hear Yixing talking to him. It was somewhere between reality and a dream. Sehun was laughing and was starring at Luhan. It felt like Sehun was close to him but yet so far away from him.

"Luhan, I told you to trust me but you didn't" Sehun said while laughing.

Luhan was shocked. He tried to scream and talk to him but his voice was never heard.

"You said you would always trust me".

I TRUST YOU SEHUN. Luhan was screaming in his head.

"If you trusted me, maybe it would've been different".

Luhan was still shocked. How did Sehun even know that he didn't trust him when he said trust me. Now he wished he had trusted him. Maybe it would've given Sehun strenght knowing that the one person he loves always trusts him.

"I have to go now".

Sehun's face started to disappear. It went further and further away.

"SEHUN PLEASE DON'T GO, I TRUST YOU. I ALWAYS HAVE AND ALWAYS WILL" Luhan heard his own voice for the first time in 2 month.

"LUHAN YOU'RE TALKING".

Luhan opened his eyes and tried to speak to Yixing but the voice never came out.

　

I trust you Sehun. I really do.