Here, read this fanfic promo cuz it's.......just as funny as the fic? xD well...almost....

http://www.asianfanfics.com/blog/view/860453

^ especially the character descriptions....

- the rest is my usual rambling...well, not so usual....more personal....deep, dark? n mostly random and incoherent, not connected to each other but maybe in some ways do? idk but you can stop reading now unless you want to get...confused? i can assure you won't understand the entire thing unless you're me....and you're not...(stop dreaming, twinnie,u ain't breaking into my mind here) - 

Honestly....idk why we work so hard to promote this fic...but since we started...might as well see it through the end...i love it n am proud of it anyway...

promoting/advertising is funnn...something i'm too proud to consider doing before....

sure, my image might be ruined now /why do i even care so much about my nonexistant image?lol/

promoting your own stuff is so not cool...

at least, that's what i keep telling myself to stop myself from doing it...

but sometimes...desperate time calls for desperate measures... loyal stalkers are the ones who often made me desperate anyway...huhu...

anyway, i don't think our fic is desperate since no matter what, we know we have two addicted readers, being ourselves...that's how we reached 50 chaps in no time....huhu...

yknow...sometimes...waiting to be noticed or be recognized or appreciated...won't end up in anything good...just waste of time...n pride...

i was the best student for a certain subject in secondary school for the whole five years...but i was never, ever selected as representative for any class competition and even on my last year where most/many final year students esp from 'so called smart' classes would all get positions in clubs n societies to help backup our higher level education entrance, it was the kind of popularity that we need(students would understand me rite?)...i was the only student who did not get even the smallest position from my class...n i actually joined the club of the subject where i was the best student for five years(well, only in that school...which was one of the lowest rank in town/state anyway...in other schools i'm just considered average at best)...n i still tried to help the teachers improve the students' level of that subject in school since i luv my school n am proud of being there cuz we're the underdog...n underdogs are <3....lol /i've been in topdog schools anyway n i don't like the snobbyness n lack of warmth/ ...what pissed me off was during the meetings, they don't even converse in language that represent that subject....but their own mothertongue which i dun understand...like...if i'm going to be the ultimate loser, let me lose in a way that makes sense...

..my point is...sometimes no matter how shy/"content"/coy/prideful/unconfident you are...you have no choice but to step up on your own cuz people ain't bother pulling you forward cuz why would they? if ur lucky...u might have a fan/slave who would do stuffs for you...but let's get real...how many of us are those 'public figures'....having wasted my five top-student years in nothingness in the end despite being qualified to at least something(apparently they think i'm not even good enough to be ajk.......i still didn't step up afterwards...i worry too much what people would think if i do step up...i worried what you would think....so i didn't....

if you think i've changed...

well, maybe the only change is that....i got tired of worrying of how people would judge me...or how i'd judge myself...or wasting chances that i can take for myself....bcuz of some pride or image...pretentiousness...

so blablabla...i lived with such worries even after schoool...i tried to be invisible everywhere i go....tried to not be noticed....../of course internet life ruined that image lol/

but even in internet life...i have lots of worries in expressing even being this expresive,....

sometimes i feel....that people feel they have the right to judge whether i change or not...n they can change accordingly to what they assume...n i'm the only one who have to struggle to prove that i'm still the same...

may i know why you can change but not me?

friendship is fickle...i don't believe in them, that much...believing only ends up in hurt. it happens everytime. that's why i don't have friend except the friends who insisted to remain with me even without interaction, the friend who remembers my birthday(n i remember her birthday) every year even when we don't talk at all n ignore each other on other days n even when i don't publish my birthday at all...yknow that kinda friend....the patient persevering victim kind of friend...huhu...

even internet friendship is like that....getting hurt is easy once you believe...i was angelicinnocent so i believed too easily n continue to believe whenever anyone said we're best friends...but now i'll just go with the flow...i think i still believe easily....but i can read between the unspoken lines much better now...i'll know that they don't last...n i'll know when things are changing n when friendships are ending...and since friendship is fickle...i won't get too hurt anymore....i can't be the one to take all the efforts in the world to maintain something only i want to maintain....it's unfair for myself...

and to those who keep adding me, while refusing to say anything even when i make some effort....you gotta try harder if you're sincere...bcuz i take friendship seriously even if friendship is fickle n so shortlived...n if you can't even move a finger to type sth decent to start a friendship...it's probly best to not even start it...bcuz obviously you don't really want it that much...

and about Congrats...

it's funny that people who don't know you at all would congrats you when........

it make me think a lot^^...

i like thinking anyway...it's fun.....\^^/

what is sincerity in this world anymore? or friendship?

am i even sincere? or just like everyone i'm judging who are judging me as well? we judge all the time...no matter how we hate to admit it...

what is sincerity? is it just a standard we use to judge everyone n shelter ourselves and change the meaning when it concerns ourselves?

yeah i like to think those pointless stuffs that has no answers...

some people think status and the way you carry yourself is an indication of change...or what you're made of...

but for me...expression is expression.

just like writers and fanfics.

writing angels n devils don't change u from being a human does it?

writing of how you crave for world peace n blablabla how kind n cool n matured you are won't change what u really feel and made of, deep down inside would it?

next time you want to think i changed....bcuz of the way i express my outer shell....

how bout i say this piece of advice to you?

"how bout you try not to be so inferior"

i thought that's my trademark. i am inferior...but comfortable enough to be myself. and to acknowledge changes as normal thing. like why not? even friendship changes. fickle.

and i know it's stupid to reveal so much on the net....but if i do this stupid act....i never know it might benefit someone out there whom i never know n who will never know who i am...it might change someone's outlook or give strength for someone? idk....i think in this fairytale way of thinking, don't i?....haha...

but if i keep everything....yeah....i get to maintain that cool image...and that's all.

i'm not a celebrity anyway...why did i even care about that?

huhu....well, i'm stupid...

maybe tomorrow i'll realize i'm wrong n regret...but who cares? if i'm too concerned about showing my perfect tomorrow....what if that tomorrow never comes?

tomorrow, i might realize what a stupid idiot embarrassing thing i am n wrote today...n come back to delete this post or sth...haha....

but as far as today is concerned, i'm awesome. ;)

ps: and...one day of adv has changed my most popular fic....in terms of subs....but in terms of comments n views, mr romantic n miss popular is still the most popular...280 comments...i don't think i can ever get that again....;) not that i'm going to try anyway bcuz that'd take away my respect for my fics...well, unlock was made with the similar guessing game element like mr n miss....but nobody guessed anyway....while for mr n miss....the readers actively guessed n be hyper n made me excited myself...that i completed the whole thing in just 2 months n i didn't even have hard time to write since the inspiration just flowed in with their guesses n predictions...n ideas...(though i don't follow the ideas)....although there was a time i hated that fic for being too popular when my other fics were ignored...but i've made peace with the annoying popularity....haha....it was good while it lasted....;)

and yes,  purposely stuff all this in a title that would turn off peeps who hate fic promo blogs....lol.

if you've read all of this....

well, here's ur reward...a great inspiring song....as always can be expected from Shinhwa....huhuh...<3

lyrics can be read here: http://aheeyah.com/lyrics/shinhwa/shinhwa_7_tran.htm

Shinhwa seriously have some of the coolest most amazing lyrics u can use to inspire ur life...

sorry to recent idols/i mean, lyriccists....u aint even close to quarter....trash lyrics are so abound these days....

if you think i'm annoying...then hey...feel free to idk...block me or sth? don't tell me cuz i'm not asking.

but if you think i'm cool ////coughscoughscoughs///...n you want to be cool too...try less, judge less, n have more faith in being yourself.

and you'd be so wayyy cooler than me...huhu.... ;) /slapped/