Today Allan called me and we talked on the phone for so long. I missed him so much! I told him that I finally told my mom. When he heard my mom's reaction, he laughed. I knew it he would do that. While I was laughing I figured out that I shouldn't keep myself unhappy and hide this feelings that I don't even know how to explain. Its to be happy, time to smile, and move on with it. Since everyone is saying that all of this is fake, I might as well go along with it. Like I said once. I detest liars. After all, if he was really gone, then he's settled up to a very good place. I finally erased the date on my board. Perhaps every 19th wasn't fated to be there. It was scripted. Maybe, its just me.