It's feels so empty. 

Suffocating. 

It's so hurts.

When I did realize that no one cares about me. Just simply blurt that they love me without giving a damn to think about my feelings. 

To understand my feelings. They keep hurting me.

Holding my griefness, shouldering it alone. At the moment you realize my cold behaviour towards you, You did asked me what's wrong and at the end, I guess you grow impatient and snapped at me. Yelling some words how hurt you are about my behaviour. Did you know how much hurt your words are to me? 

That's why I couldn't tell anyone about my sadness, my problems. Why? Because I know they didn't understand at the first place. They couldn't understand. Simply, I don't trust anyone on that part. I prefer keep it to myself.

You once told me, holding pressure alone isn't a good thing. You did say that you want to share my griefness. Which I decided to apologize.and share about my griefness with you.

But what happened? You keep the blame on me. Saying humans are not perfect, some make mistakes. Yes, that's true. You didn't comforted me yet you firmly said you understood what I felt. 

Nonsense! 

You asked me what you should do instead. Isn't obvious? Seriously? You don't know?

Ouch then. 

It's unfair. 

Everything is a mess. You ignored me after that.

See? 

That's why I prefer keeping all my problems to myself. No biggie. I get hurt. But not when I get more hurt than I am when you simply ignore about it, ignore me, ignore my feelings. It's better keeping myself. 

Everything that happened around me, make me realize how unwanted I am to them. Why? Because I'm a burden. Everyone keep leaving me.

And that's how the numbness crept in my heart. No matter what's happening to me, I can't feel it. Too numb I guess. 

And don't ask me why I simply can understand people's feelings because I went through more than they are. 

Somehow, I'm glad.

Random~ heheh~ A teaser maybe? Dunno. ^^