So, you could check my other blogpost of him entitled 'My first ever heartbreak' or u can just read this. 

Yesterday, my deskmate in high school who becomes bestfriends with my high school crush set a dinner date for me ,him and her. I asked her for it coz...He's moving out out of the country in a few months, I know nothing will change, I hella know he won't ever have feelings for me yet... Being me... I still want to see him and get my heartbroken for the second time. This guy, is different... I told u people abt me breaking up with my bf but amidst of that. My heart has a special space for this guy. 

My friend and I got at the mall first. He was supposed to come later. I was so excited ,wearing my best clothes, extra effort on my make up. Literally, trying so hard as if i will have a chance pfft. We were supposed to meet him at the bookstore. I was roaming around then my eyes caught him walking in looking fine as always. I was so shy I turn my back and walk the opposite way, my friend was at other section. I just stood behind the bookshelf watching him walking towards my friend, I decided to pretend as if I am walking towards that friend as well. I couldn't hide my smile,I.like him that much. 

He said hi to me, smiling and being a dork that i am. I was stunned andawkwardly smiles back. He said he didn't have his glasses on so he couldn't recognize me. We walk, 3 of us. I was in the middle then he moves to my friend's side. I was a bit sad abt that but understandablr, we r not close.

So I told him abt my college lifr and crack stupid jokes then he said, 'You're so full of expressions , it's fun watching u tell stories.'  My smile just goes up to my ears hahaha.

I hate sushi but I eat it bcoz of him. We do more talking then I saw his phone case then he said ' Oh, this? She gave it to me.' "She" is his gf, my highschool friend. My face just went sad, then he talked abt some music things with my friend, i took a few steps back and walk behind them. I know so well I don't stand a chance but I still have this tiny hope and it's gone.

I wassilence for sometime and played with my phone. Ignoring their talks. Then we eat , took some pics then I wanted coffee. I was so excited abt that and to get my mind off him. He catch after me and pay for my drink. I was surprised and said thanks. Couldn't hide my smile.

Then myfriend wants coffee of different brand so she told us to stay while she goes alone. My friend knows how much I like this guy so she kinda give me a chance to be alone with him. Stupidly,I sat expecting him to do the same but he goes after her and Im left alone hahaha. 

I really want to go home at that moment but I can't leave my friend alone. It was late and my mood just gone extremely down, I'm heartbroken for the second time. He offered us a ride home coz it was close to midnight. 

I sit at the back,hearing them talk. I stare out the window, wanting to reach home quick. I said thanks and got out the car, couldn't bare to stand another minute of watching his face I walk so fast not looking back.

As soon as I got hoke, I got in the shower and goesstraight to sleep.

I NEED TOMOVE ON