　　CONVERSE HIGH / KIM JAEHAN.

PROFILE

NAME KIM JAEHAN

DATE OF BIRTH 09/24/99

ACADEMIC TRACK DRAMATIC LITERATURE

ETHNICITY KOREAN

AGE 18

GENDER MALE

BACKUP FACECLAIM CHOI SEUNGCHEOL SVT

HOMETOWN SEONGNAM, GYEONGGI-DO, REPUBLIC OF KOREA

BACKGROUND

THE CHERRY ORCHARD ANTON CHEKHOV
( alternatively: nostalgia is suffocating. i do not wish to remember what i can no longer have )

somehow, as kim jaehan watches on during the entr'acte, images from that time keep elapsing in sharp focus, not a detail out of place. but like any conventional playwright, he'll start at the very beginning.

his family had always known wealth in excess, family name synonymous with old money and modern nobility. jaehan was never much of a problem child even as the youngest, too busy ruminating over picture books and reading fantastical tall tales and playing pretend with his weekend playdate buddies, maybe they were monday playdate buddies, memories are imperfect. his mother would always fondly say that he had a vivid imagination, seeing reality unlike how most others would.

his father was not unkind nor was he a particularly bad father, but he was rarely home, so jaehan would engrave his face to memory when he saw him smiling at the drawings and stories his son would make for him because the only other time jaehan would see his face is when he was on tv. his mother was charming, soft-spoken, and had dedicated the rest of her life to loving her children with more than what her heart had room for to compensate for her loveless marriage. his older brother, jaewon, took too much pride in bearing the title of heir to the conglomerate, counting chickens before there were even eggs to hatch.

and then there was jaein, his older sister by five years, the light of his life. in fact, she was so bright, he'd stared and stared and stared until the light singed his irises.

she first appeared on the small screen, and even at the tender age of 8 she managed to steal the hearts of the korean public with her crooked grin and botticelli curls. jaehan would watch his sister at the filming set with simultaneous admiration and fear of this person in front of the camera who he could barely recognize. but then jaein would run over and pick him up after the director yelled cut, twirling him round and round and round until they were both dizzied and exhausted and laughing on the ground, and he'd remember how much he adored his older sister, his jaein-noona, the person that brought so much color to his life.

at age 14, when her career saw a lull in activity, geummun opened her doors for the nation's little sister, offering a full scholarship with respect to jaein's talents despite her being from one of the wealthiest families in south korea. jaehan felt the tangible vacancy in the estate, hesitantly taking steps in her old room to remember how she'd read him his favorite storybooks when he'd still jumble up his alphabet and how she acted out the best damsel in distress whenever he'd tug on her skirt and ask her to play save the princess with him.

jaehan spent his childhood screaming to anyone that would listen that his older sister is the best actress in the world! yet wishing that he too could hold a light to her, one that could perhaps even outshine her achievements and his brother's largely growing ego combined. nine-year-old jaehan was talked into auditioning for the annual primary school play, a modified version of peter pan, and though he managed to seize the leading role with a charm of his own, it was clear that he lacked the innate presence that his sister had.

but this was when he finally saw theatre from his sister's eyes, as much more than a member of the audience looking on an empty stage but as a reflection—no, an extension of reality, a chance for the stories that he would pen in his head to be brought to life. at dinner one evening, when the only person missing was not his father but jaein, he clenched his fist tight around his fork and firmly asked if he could join his sister at geummun. he remembered hearing jaewon snort, or perhaps mutter something condescending, memories are imperfect, but what he does remember is his father's face beyond the tv screen, the elegant wipe his mouth before he replies, "fine."

(he remembers his very first day at geummun. and he wishes he'd held on to the memory of meeting his sister at the gates, her blinding smile as she wrapped him in a hug and promptly introduced him to all her friends—he'd been overwhelmed because all her friends meant nearly the entire school, because kim jaein was geummun's golden girl, because he missed her so goddamn much that he didn't even catch half the names that were thrown at him if only he could just bask in being by her side. he wishes he'd held on to jaein tighter, because memories are imperfect, and he can't stand to think what would happen when her face and her presence becomes another blurry image in the recesses of his mind.)

ROSENCRATZ AND GUILDENSTERN ARE DEAD TOM STOPPARD
( alternatively: you stare chance in the face, yet comply to its terms )

it is here that jaehan inadvertently tips the first domino to the events of the worst years of his life, his tale's downfall.
hindsight is always 20-20, but in such a case, he'd much rather be blind.

he doesn't remember much of life before geummun after having entered at age 9. here, he's allowed and even encouraged to play pretend as much as he wants. he makes friends rather quickly, climbing through the ranks by himself over the years, though "oh, you're kim jaein's little brother!" becomes a frequent icebreaker. he learns not to take it to heart, flashing the other person with a prepossessing grin of his own before replying, "yep, but trust me, there's a reason i'm the family favorite."

jaehan decides that the stage and its scorching hot lights aren't for him, it has always been meant for jaein and jaein alone, so he chooses to write instead for his academic track. he's no shakespeare but the scripts he writes are compelling and meaningful, showing abstract themes and concepts in a tangible manner, even if they require a further stretch of the imagination, a distorted suspension of belief. his first big project is a collaboration with the theatre department. his script is chosen by an extremely proficient actor two years above him—tak junki. jaehan is taken back to the awe and terror he felt watching his sister on screen for the first time, but the tour de force that was tak junki and his acting—no, his entire persona, left him breathless in a way that reminded him of being strangled.

the student-directed play this year is romeo and juliet. jaein and her boyfriend audition together in hopes of getting the chance to play the titular characters. over dinner, she even begs the director, a family friend, to give them a break—it's their last year at geummun, after all. jaein goes to sleep early that night and the director, taeho-hyung, makes small talk with jaehan over a game of chess. taeho smirks when he asks the offhanded question, "i trust your instincts, jaehan. you're as good as any theatre student in my year. do you think jaein's man should play romeo?"

"honored to have your approval, hyung," jaehan stares at the chessboard before leaning back to think about it. her boyfriend's good, sure, but if he's going to be honest, there are much better actors in the department. a face comes to mind. he moves his bishop.

"honestly, he's not that good. he's missing that bit of...i don't know. truth? believable...ness?" jaehan makes vague hand gestures to emphasize his point before continuing, "there's a kid two years above me that's really good at that, i think you might know him. check, by the way."

taeho quirks a brow, smile growing marginally wider, "ah, tak junki?"

"yeah, that's the guy."

"interesting. to be fair, your sister's boyfriend did have a good audition and i was quite compelled to choose him," taeho moves his rook across the board, "but that tak junki. he is really quite impressive...well, when your sister finds out, you're the one who ed her over."

jaehan chuckles, but his laughter quickly turns into loud protests when he looks at the chessboard after taeho's move.

"and checkmate, by the way."

(as much as he blamed himself for what happened, jaehan alone could not have been the impetus. he realized his choice had been much like the flip of a coin; whatever the outcome, taeho still knew the decision he was going to make. and even if tak junki failed to play romeo and drive his sister over the edge of the theatre building that day, he still would have clawed, struggled, killed his way to get to where he wanted to be. it was inevitable, and yet jaehan couldn't help but feel that there was still something he could've done, something someone should have done.)

SIX CHARACTERS IN SEARCH OF AN AUTHOR LUIGI PIRANDELLO

( alternatively: with the turn of a dime, i can only see you for what you've made of yourself )

when jaehan closes his eyes, he sees the body of his sister on the concrete, neck and limbs bent at impossible angles, hair perfectly fanned out on the ground like a halo of light. he feels the grief press down on his chest like a marble column has fallen on it, crushing his ribs, making him choke on rubble and blood. but he also feels the anger, the disbelief, the guilt muddled in his head, because how could the strongest ing person he'd ever known throw herself away like that? how could she be so selfish, to have been the cause of sorrow for thousands of adoring fans, to have torn their family apart because they didn't know how to grieve for the unexpected death? how could he have not known the devils that haunted jaein to the point where she decided living was no longer worth the horror?

his father stops coming home indefinitely. his mother plays sad songs on the cello, forgets to feed herself. his brother starts drinking on a daily basis (and as disgusting as it is, jaehan feels comfort in the fact that jaewon still cares). jaehan doesn't come back for the summer and spends his time writing and writing and writing so the storm in his head could drain onto paper instead of festering into something uglier.

he sees tak junki around sometimes, trailed by his friends who don't seem to care that the greatest thing to have stepped into geummun has left the school in a casket. when jaehan catches the ringleader's eye, junki smiles as consolation. but jaehan twists it and sees contempt and challenge, like a dog baring his teeth, a threat. he doesn't know whether his imagination is correct, or just that, a figment of his own mind's creation, and he's simply trying to find someone to blame. the sudden sombre environment of fear at the feet of tak junki seems to be jaehan's first target. the second? himself.

the year after jaein's death is numbing. recovery is slow, and he takes his time because he can't seem to let go of the sadness, anger, and guilt over accepting that jaein is more likely to be happier wherever she is now than she had ever been here, so it builds and builds until he's left with a cinderblock of emotions that he's forgotten how to perceive. he pretends, finding a facsimile of contentment in on-and-off relationships, hook-ups, anything to make him forget the feeling of not feeling ing anything, and it's easy because somehow, as jaein's beautiful face is rotting six feet under at their family cemetery, jaehan begins blooming at age 15, his face and body beginning to sculpt into sharp lines and edges, something more handsome and mature.

it takes everything in himself to wake up and go to class, smiles for his friends automatic as they check up on him. food doesn't taste like much. cigarettes start smelling like home. but he gets angry quickly, especially when his manuscripts don't turn out the way he wants, tarnishing the perfection that his sister once created. he tries to forget, but realizes he doesn't want to forget. at the end of the year, he immortalizes kim jaein in a one-act play. he sees the a+ at the top of the page and promptly tears the script to bits.

and then he finds her old phone.

he remembers seeing red and barely being able to perceive the texts on the LED screen, or maybe it was because of the tears pooling in his eyes, memories are imperfect, but he still manages to read them all. and tak junki is a ing son of a .

he takes two chugs from a bottle of his roommate's illicit whiskey, tries to feel the numbness he'd tried to forget so hard wash over him. drunk on his own anger than from any amount of liquor, he finds himself stumbling in front of tak junki's door, broken bottle of jack daniels in one hand, with all intentions of maiming and hurting until the other feels what he'd gone through the past year.

when junki opens the door and pulls him inside his room swiftly, he realizes he's made a mistake. a knife is at jaehan's throat before he finishes yelling. junki smiles, and jaehan suddenly has the passing thought that this was probably how his sister felt moments after she took flight from that building that day.

the knife makes the smallest incision on his neck before jaehan moves. junki is 17 and much stronger than jaehan, but he brings the jagged edge of the whiskey bottle to junki's back before steeling himself and using his body weight to push the other off of him when junki's grip loosens. jaehan's survival instincts keep him going as all other functions of his body shut down, and the next time he blinks he finds himself running through the corridors back to his room, locking it twice for safety and finding refuge underneath his bedsheets.

he demands to be transferred to a public school the next day.

(he remembers how the people jaein used to call friends would talk about her a few weeks after her death, when the soil on her grave was still fresh. "she was weak, she had loads of insecurity issues, i'm pretty sure she was bulimic too." he thinks it's funny how people can change at the turn of a dime, so he laughs and laughs and laughs until his throat starts burning and tears are falling down his face. and then he thinks about how pitiful he must look, so he puts on a strong front and smiles through the cracks.)

(i'm sorry jaein, i couldn't save you, i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry)

THE GLASS MENAGERIE TENNESSEE WILLIAMS
( alternatively: smoking's easy to do, sleeping gets harder. i wish i could tell you it gets better. )

jaehan finds himself at the gates of geummun for his senior year of high school. he flattens the of his dead cigarette on the pristine grass with his shoe before taking a step forward.

the school's been reopened, his mother says, if you're interested in taking up writing again. he looks at her over the samuel beckett play he's reading, glasses sliding down his nose. his first thought is to run away, to ignore it all, his 2 years away from geummun has been tough but he's sane, he's learning how to live like a normal human being again, he's made friends, he has a girlfriend, his family finally found some kind of closure and is closer than ever before, and he isn't about to throw away the safety of all that he had to be thrown back into hell.

but somehow he can't seem to escape the entrancing pull of the school, even to this day.

perhaps he wants to see if anything's changed while he was gone, perhaps to confirm that nothing has changed, but mostly, he missed bringing stories to life on stage, and public school is nothing short of suffocating for his creative desires. he ends up saying fine to the offer, and his mother smiles, tells him that he was always meant for this life, that his sister would be so proud of him for doing what he's always wanted to do.

(he walks through the gates and into the school's main courtyard, sees that the fountain with cupid is no longer there, or perhaps it was some other greek deity, memories are imperfect. his phone buzzes, message from his girlfriend seola wishing him good luck on his first day. he takes a deep breath and decides that after being excruciatingly dragged through it and back, stepping into hell again doesn't frighten him all that much anymore.)

INTERNALLY

THE THESPIAN, OR THE WAR ONLY HE KNEW - A Play in Two Acts (2015)

CHARACTERS

KIM JAEHAN, the protagonist
TAK JUNKI, the villain, the nightmare
KIM JAEIN, the sister, the savior
JUNKI'S CIRCLE, the villain's infantry

EXTRAS:
KANG CHEOL, the historian. Jaehan remembers him as the prodigy author, a distinct chiaroscuro to his feral older sister, but does not know much else about him. He also does not know what to make of Cheol's inquisitive ways, not wanting to risk digging up the past, even if it is for the betterment of Geummun. Jaehan is tempted though, because doing so may also bring full closure to the death of his sister.
HAN SUNGJIN, the roommate. A bit of a wildcard, he likes the social scene more than the academics side of Geummun. Extremely aware of the social pyramid and tends to stay on his lane so he isn't caught in one of Tak Junki's traps. He helps Jaehan cope with his sister's death by introducing him to cigarettes and providing him alcohol.
JANG SEOLA, the girlfriend. Jaehan finds sanctuary in her, though the relationship often looks more like one between a caretaker and a patient than a boyfriend and girlfriend.
FRIENDS, the companions. A group of people Jaehan would consider being close to him, though he really only appreciates the presence of a few.

ACT I, SCENE I

(Enter STAGE LEFT JAEHAN. He walks in the cafeteria with a smile, but his steps are deliberate and almost forced. Students' chatter should simmer down to a low murmur. He stops in front of a full table, and looks up.)

ACTOR'S NOTES:
gonna be scribbling all over this script, as per director's instructions. at least jaehan seems like an interesting enough character to dissect.

objectively, jaehan seems to lands closer to neutral than good, possibility of tipping over the edge if pushed hard enough? but trigger cannot be something trivial, as he still seems to stand on the side of good despite rather tragic events in character's background. actions mostly dictated by what benefits him and his loved ones the most, but this fact disgusts him as he generally wishes to have a positive impact on the world. often conflicted by the right thing to do, and the easiest, most practical thing to do. with this view, he could also generally be seen as pragmatic, carefully thinking out decisions based on future instead of acting on impulse

SUNGJIN: Hey man, where were you this morning?
JAEHAN: Couldn't sleep, had nightmares about jumping off the roof. I went for a
smoke. Sorry if my alarm woke you up.
SUNGJIN: Nah, it's fine, I would've slept in anyway.
JISOO: Jaehan, I saved some kimbap for you!
JAEHAN: I'm not hungry, but thanks for thinking of me anyway, Jisoo.
JISOO: It's nothing, you'd do the same for me.
BOY 1: Why don't I ever get any, Ji?
JAEHAN: Maybe if you'd stop being a creep and hitting on her so much, she'll give
you some.

(The friends at the table laugh uncomfortably. They all share a look before resuming mindless chatter. Exit STAGE RIGHT JAEHAN. Fade to BLACKOUT.)

ACTOR'S NOTES:
more in-depth look into jaehan. prone to looking at the world in two-dimensions, seeing everyone as a role in a play rather than a human being with depth. note use of name "boy 1," trivializing those who don't really matter to him since they don't even have proper names (he does name those who seem close to him, or is trustworthy in his eyes, like sungjin the roommate or jisoo). rather typical of a playwright immersed in his art. often projects his own image of who everyone is, or who he assumes they are based on his own knowledge of interactions with them and what he sees and hears about them. seems to get to the point that who he thinks they are automatically becomes who they actually are in his mind. follow the same line of logic - seems to be rather judgmental, condescending at worst? also note: could be too romantic, has ideals he keeps wanting to project onto people, could also be a big dreamer, esp. considering artistic side and large supply of creativity. again, he seems to be impeded by something like a door stopper i.e. his need to be practical

ACT I, SCENE II

(Enter STAGE LEFT JAEHAN. He walks towards a group of eight friends talking among themselves.)

JUNKI: Kim Jaehan--
JAEHAN: you.

(JAEHAN punches him in the face. JUNKI staggers backwards before laughing. The other seven laugh at him with increasing intensity. JAEHAN clenches a fist before punching him again.)

ACTOR'S NOTES: note jaehan's discomfort in the face of derisive laughter - a sign of insecurity? clearly does not like being looked at as inferior, perhaps stemming from his being overshadowed by two successful older siblings. seems to constantly want to prove something.

JUNKI KID 1: Do you think you can fight him by yourself?
JUNKI KID 2: Because you must be ing deluded.
JAEHAN: He's human just like me, why can't I fight him? Or maybe I'm wrong. You
know, Tak Junki, I had a lot of respect for you, but clearly that was
misplaced.

(JUNKI laughs before stopping abruptly and staring at JAEHAN intently.)

JUNKI: You seem to think I give a .

ACTOR'S NOTES: clearly hostile towards junki, but still seems to put him in a higher position than the others, as none of them are named. perhaps this is out of true fear? note junki does not ever touch him in this scene, yet jaehan still feels threatened. jaehan has only ever had an encounter with junki and sees what he could be capable of; as for the others, it seems that he is perceptive enough to sense that none of them have any real power without junki by their side. if he's gone, the social pyramid collapses. then again, he might not actually know what they're all capable of. prime example of putting people in roles rather than seeing them as human beings.

(The group's laughter increases in intensity until it becomes deafening. Fade to BLACKOUT.)

ACT I, SCENE III

(Enter STAGE LEFT JAEHAN. He sits down at a desk and begins to furiously write. Though it seems that he is writing an angry note, his smile shows no signs of malice or bad intentions. He is content.)

(Enter STAGE RIGHT JAEIN. She glides in next to Jaehan and peers over his shoulder. Her gasp is light as she reads the material on the paper.)

JAEIN: Wow, Jaehan! This is really good!
JAEHAN: Really? It still needs a bit of work, I think.
JAEIN: I'm serious, Professor Choi would be so impressed.
JAEHAN: Thanks, Jaein, that really means a lot. With a bit of work, I think it could
be really good. I don't want it to be like my last assignment. That was a
mess.

ACTOR'S NOTES: the only scene where jaehan seems to be comfortable and in his element. genuinely loves writing, also looks to be his outlet when overwhelmed as seen by the furious writing exhibited in the first part. a natural hardworker, perhaps striving for a paragon every time he sets his mind to do something. in terms of finding pride in his accomplishments, he seems to realistically be able to analyze his work and see both faults and merits, a good sign of being able to properly reflect on his past mistakes. also is very comfortable with jaein, but there's an added layer of him needing validation from her.

(JAEIN ruffles her brother's hair and looks at him fondly.)

JAEIN: You'll do fine, don't worry.
JAEHAN: Do you think you'd want to perform this, if you could?

ACTOR'S NOTES: seems to see her as the standard of perfection. if she says she will, then it will validate this piece of work for him on a personal level and allow him to fully appreciate it. again, projecting ideals on people who are imperfect.

JAEIN: Definitely! I'd actually love to act this out.

(JAEHAN smiles. It is genuine.)

JAEIN: Anyway, sorry Han, I gotta go.
JAEHAN: Okay. You'll be back right?
JAEIN: You bet I will. See you soon!

(Exit STAGE LEFT JAEIN. Fade to BLACKOUT.)

EXTERNALLY

THE THESPIAN, OR THE WAR ONLY HE KNEW - A Play in Two Acts (2015)

ACT II, SCENE I

SUNGJIN: Hey man, where were you this morning?
JAEHAN: Just woke up super early. New year, new me?
SUNGJIN: Good joke! I'll see you out of bed tomorrow at 12 pm.
JISOO: Stop teasing him! It's good that you woke up early, Hannie! Anyway, I saved
you some kimbap!
JAEHAN: And this is why you're my favorite. Thanks, Jisoo.
JISOO: It's nothing, you'd do the same for me!
BOY 1: Why don't I ever get any, Ji?
JAEHAN: Jisoo only treats handsome guys, man.

(The friends at the table laugh loudly, it is a scene of camaraderie. Jaehan waves to them before getting up to leave. Exit STAGE RIGHT JAEHAN. Fade to BLACKOUT.)

ACTOR'S NOTES: act i is his introspective self, shows his thoughts and thinking process, whereas act ii is how the world sees him. he seems to get along well with his friends, charming and easygoing to the general public, quick sense of humor. hides his inner conflicts well, yet jisoo still seems to have a semblance of worry, alluding to the fact that his friends are still quite wary of his mental state after the death of his sister. generally, he doesn't seem to start conversations unless he needs to, but when he does he's generally quite pleasant with an edge of light-hearted wit. it could be assumed that if he wasn't too sociable, the school would easily kick him to the curb, as if he doesn't stand his own against his sister's bright personality, he would easily be overshadowed.

on the other hand - seems a bit obvious, if one looks hard enough, that he's clearly thrown up walls. conversations can be genuine up until a certain point, then you realize that he is never completely there. extroverted introvert, analyzing and overthinking and living in his own world, only peeking to look outside when he really needs to. not could be that the innocuous, yet insulting "jokes" he tells his friends and others are actually a leak of what he's actually thinking about them vs. actual jokes.

ACT II, SCENE II

(Enter STAGE LEFT JAEHAN. He walks towards a large group of people, who look at him before turning and murmuring. Exit STAGE RIGHT JAEHAN.)

GIRL 1: It's Kim Jaein's brother! He's back! I wonder if he's still caught up
   over...you know.
BOY 2: He looks like he's dealing with it okay. He's a lot more quiet than he used to
   be, but all things considered, I'm just surprised he didn't follow her
   footsteps.
GIRL 1: Good that he didn't. He must have been super outgoing before his sister died,
   I feel really bad for him. But I liked working with him in drama lit, he's
   still super nice and really easy to talk to.
BOY 2: You're just saying that because he's hot.
GIRL 1: Yeah, okay, that helps too. But I wonder why he left school just like that?
BOY 3: He's always had a huge head. Maybe even Geummun wasn't good enough for him.
GIRL 1: Oh, shut up, you're just jealous because he's talented, smart, AND hot.
BOY 2: You gotta give him credit, he's worked hard to be that good. It takes a lot to
   be Kim Jaein's sister, after all.
GIRL 1: It's probably because of what happened with his sister.

(BOY 2 leans in conspiratorially before whispering.)

BOY 2: But rumor also had it that he picked a fight with Tak Junki.
BOY 3: Jesus, seriously? He's really in over his head.
GIRL 1: He wouldn't! He's so chill, why would he do that?
BOY 3: Man, I don't know, but if it's true then I really do feel bad for him.

(They continue whispering. Fade to BLACKOUT.)

ACTOR'S NOTES: while he's easygoing, he also has the reputation of being hardworking and smart, meaning that his words would have more substance than just bad jokes and meaningless small talk. his character of kim jaein's talented and charming little brother seems to be replaced with a giant pity party hosted by the school, he's been reduced to the event that occurred that year rather than the scripts that he writes or his carefree personality. opinions on him are divided, some think he's bigheaded, others think he does deserve the praise that he gets. note established rumor of conflict between him and tak junki - rather than being appalled at the fact that he started a fight, they feel bad because junki will probably demolish jaehan if he so chooses to. thus shows that no matter what, even the persona of tak junki will be stronger than kim jaehan in the flesh

ACT II, SCENE III

(Enter STAGE RIGHT JAEIN. She glides in next to Jaehan and peers over his shoulder. Her gasp is light as she reads the material on the paper.)

(JAEIN ruffles her brother's hair and looks at him fondly.)

JAEIN: You'll do fine, don't worry.
JAEHAN: Do you think you'd want to perform this, if you could?
JAEIN: Definitely! I'd actually love to act this out.

(JAEHAN smiles. It is genuine.)

JAEIN: Anyway, sorry Han, I gotta go.
JAEHAN: Okay. You'll be back right?
JAEIN: You bet I will. See you soon!

(Exit STAGE LEFT JAEIN. Fade to BLACKOUT.)

ACTOR'S NOTES: she doesn't come back.

ETERNALLY

in essence, kim jaehan represents the fallout caused by tak junki and his friends — when they talk about the deaths of other students in the story, they do it in a very flippant and nonchalant manner, which is of course not at all a bad thing because it fits so well with their characters. at the same time, it gave me inspiration to provide a perspective from a student that has had his life ruined by them, or more specifically by junki himself. it's another thing to note that jaehan had always been there with the intention of pursuing the art that he loved, even though he was lucky enough to have been more or less near the top of the social pyramid pre-tak junki; hence, it's not like he was purposely looking to cause trouble for people.

at the end of the day, the people whose lives they've affected are in fact actual people, not just a mere body count or another notch on the proverbial bed. funny bc this is exactly the opposite of how jaehan would see it, if he was in junki's shoes.

he might be sort of a challenge for cheol to undertake because clearly jaehan has had something to do with the clique; otherwise, why would he have left school a year after the incident with his sister and not immediately after? jaehan is, as mentioned before, hesitant on having anything to do with going back in time and reliving the events mostly out of fear; obviously he still has a grudge he's holding against junki but it's clear that even now he can't seem to shake off the fear that he'll come back to destroy what he has once more. the resolution that cheol seeks to undertake may benefit him the most.

also it's an interesting dynamic to play out between the two mostly because they're both influenced by their older sisters; whereas cheol had once been disgusted by binna, jaehan held and still holds jaein in extremely high regard. on the flip side, cheol now wants to discover what actually happened in regards to his sister, whereas jaehan seems adamant on pushing everything under the carpet.

it might also be a different vibe to have him in the story because even though he's gone through some , much like the others, he still tries to retain his easygoing, almost extroverted personality (i do hope i portrayed this in the two personality sections). note that this is less "jaehan is a special snowflake who tries to hide his problems" and more of a representation of what school life was like before tak junki happened, and also to show that not all geummun students are looking over their shoulder in fear and paranoia...even if at some point in his school life there he does end up doing this exact thing.

( p.s: the formatting of internally/externally basically revolves around an actual script representing jaehan, and the actor's notes are little annotations that an actor might write in order to help him fully develop the character so that he could play him well — based on lee strasberg's method acting. this is why the descriptions are in lower case and incomplete sentences, i swear it's not just me being lazy D: in terms of important face claims, i imagined jaein as naeun from apink! and for headcanon's sake, roommate sungjin = jung jaewon and girlfriend seola = chungha wehey )

( comments: my first app on this website was actually one for truth or dare; i just never got around to finishing it and this remains one of my biggest regrets to be quite honest! i might try to bring that character back for ch if i get inspired, she was quite fun to write up until writer's block clocked me on the head hahah

anyway, i hope this application was coherent in some sense! i can't believe i finished it in two days but honestly after finishing the first arc of t/d (which was ing INCREDIBLe by the way, the image of junri and yonggeon at the end of chapter seven was so resounding i think i might have dreamt about it the other day) i was so eager to write something and, well, this happened. my biggest problem with him is that his personality is missing a thing...he's mostly driven by events in his background and it might be hard to write him as a character because of this, but i'll wait for your review and see what i could fix! also, thank you so much for your dedication to this story, it's incredibly inspiring and t/d really is an amazing piece of work. i'm super excited to follow the rest of the story, good luck with everything!! xx )

KIMJAEHAN

18 / DRAMATIC LITERATURE / RICH KID / KIM HANBIN IKON
KEEP YOURSELF WARM, SET ME ABLAZE

uglyfics

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lilico #1 Aug 8, 2016 20:05:11

INHALES DEEPLY
EXHALES

lambhorns #2 Aug 8, 2016 16:24:55

um this is literally the most beautiful thing i've ever seen in my life.
esp 'the thespian, or the war only he knew'
this brought out the biggest theatre nerd inside me it's amazing