Seokjin POV

I walked down the deserted street, it was thundering at the moment. It was around 2 in the morning which seemed perfect for my destination.

The thoughts of the past week replayed in my head, I'm not going to be good enough for them, I have nothing.

Nothing to offer but weakness.

Nothing to feel but a burden.

Nothing to do about it besides leave.

And that's what I've decided, my members would be fine without me.

I was the last link and the weakest of the other 6.

I'll miss them and I love them but my connection with them isn't enough to make me stay and feel like crap for not being able to improve.

I'm the oldest so I should be able to exceed everyone's expectations, yet I can't even meet them half way.

The maknae is 5 years younger than me and yet he does everything I can't flawlessly.

It'd just be best to get rid of myself.

Erase myself from the picture.

The other members are too nice to realize how useless I am but I know how they truly feel, and this is what's best.

I continued walking through the cold winter rain, onto the bridge that hovered over pitch black water.

I stepped on to the edge and looked down.

The angry waves crashed with the boulder rocks, where my future and ending lies.

How could I have lasted this long?

Was I so arrogant and blinded with fame to realize my inability to shine?

I stepped closer to the edge, breathing in the salty air.. It felt almost refreshing.

I looked down once more, deciding on what to do.. Is this best?

Will the members even mourn over my death? Will they cry each night in hopes of my return?

They'll most likely be grateful, Namjoon can finally have his own room.

It'll be easier to live in the dorm with 6 people, less cleaning.

Food will be cheaper and the younger ones won't be annoyed by me anymore.

Its not like I was close to any of them in the first place.

I felt a prickling burn in my eyes and throat.

My vision became blurred as tears formed.

No matter how long or hard I attempted to become better it didn't work.

I feel as if everything I've done has increased in failure.

If only I took up more training or became more serious about being the top.

I wouldn't feel this way if I hadn't messed up so much.

Namjoon was most likely to drop me out of the group anyways, but now he won't have to.

This is probably the only thing ill be able to do right.

Tears were now running hot down my cheeks, mixing with the chilled rain.

I looked up to the sky, stars sprinkled over pitch black.

The moon shown bright and detailed.

I then looked out into the distance of the sea, its dark beauty fills my sight and mind whole.

I spread my arms out and began to lean forward, prepared to let the dark liquid release my grief and sorrow.

As I was almost fully tipped into air,  strong arms wrapped around my torso.

Those same arms pulled me off the edge and threw me on the ground.

I opened my eyes slightly, a blurred figure hovered over me.

He seemed to be yelling but no words were recognized.

Then the details started to become clear, this male had blonde hair that was close to white. He was tall, skinny and looked livid.

Once I looked closer I could see his eyes were pink and filled with tears.

But this wasn't any male, it was one that held secret specialty to me, Namjoon.

He grabbed my shoulders and shook me.

His cries of anger started to form into words.

"HYUNG WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE TRYING TO DO?! YOU COULD'VE DIED AND AHH WHAT THE WAS GOING THROUGH YOUR HEAD?!"

He continued to shake me while he screamed but suddenly stopped and engulfed me into his body.

"Hyung... Oh my god... You almost gave me a heart attack. How could you even... Why would you even do something like that. I'd probably die if you left.. Don't ever do that again. Don't even think of doing something like that.. Don't leave.. Don't ever leave."

Namjoon clenched my body to his and his warm tears mixed with my cold drenched shirt sleeve.

My tears also doubled and drenched his jacket as I sobbed loudly.

He soon loosened his deadly grip and wrapped his hands around my cheeks, forcing me to look into his eyes.

"How could you not have thought of the despair I would feel if you left?

Do you not realize how much I love and care for you?

Do you not realize my need to see you everyday just to be happy and satisfied?

I can't, I won't let you go, I'm sorry hyung if that might seem selfish but trying to disappear is equally selfish."

I tried to look anywhere but his face, my soul hurt from the confrontation of feelings that were just shown to me.

I didn't know I was needed so strongly.

"Seokjin hyung, please look at me."

I slowly looked down his face, rain droplets now soaked his hair and ran down his cheeks. Although it was dark out I could see his lips becoming purple from the harsh cold.

After gathering up enough mental courage, I looked into his eyes and my heart dropped lower.

His eyes were filled with sadness and need, like he had just witnessed his mother being killed.

His dark eyes screamed of desperation and reassurance, he needed to know everything would be okay.

"Promise you'll stay... I need to hear it clearly or I'll refuse to leave you be."

My eyes followed a droplet traveling down his smooth skin till it disappeared at his chin.

Namjoon pulled my face an inch closer, till the tips of our noses were just about to touch, forcing me to look in his eyes again.

I gulped and let out a warm shaky breath.

His eyes slowly traveled down my face, taking in everything in his sight, and stopping at my quivering lips as he waited for my answer.

"I won't leave you... Namjoon, I need you."

As soon as the words processed through his mind Namjoon crashed our freezing cold lips together, the rain silk between them. It felt like the most uplifting and amazing thing I've experienced.

Warmth filled my shivering self.

He pulled me to his body, it felt like I could feel everything he was feeling just by the contact of our skin.

Soon we slowly released, leaving a centimeter between our faces for breathing room.

We stayed like this for some time then Namjoon grabbed my hand and pulled me up from the ground.

We walked hand in hand to the end of the bridge where a bike stood with an umbrella and jacket.

He grabbed the jacket and wrapped it around my shoulders.

"I just thought you were off to the store but I'm happy I followed you."

We ended up getting home at 4 in the morning, we took a hot shower together and snuggled up in his bed.

I should've realized Namjoon's love without having to be on the brick of death but either way...

I'm happy Namjoon was there.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hello! I hope you enjoyed the namjin feels!

This is my first fanfiction so i hope i did well.

Please comment and tell me what you thought, also leave ideas of future stories you would like to see.

~NAGATO_COM