"Momma~" Chaemin cutely calls to her mother as she runs the fastest she can manage. She stops for a while and covers with her little hands, laughing softly. And then proceeds on marching towards the woman who gave birth to her. 

I smiled unknowingly. I have always had a soft part to little kids and Chaemin is one of the cutest kids I have ever met. Her smile always comes from her cheeks and her eyes would be so small that would make anyone wonder if she can still see with them. She was always so cheerful, making me wanna squeeze her soft fluffy chubby cheeks with both my hands. 

But I'm not going to do that, no. There's this one guy who doesn't want her cheeks to be violated by sinful hands. Maybe he's just jealous. Yeah yeah he is just waaaaay too cute to make me wanna play with his face too (please mind the sarcasm). 

That made me look at Chaemin's father who hasn't move an inch since I came. Looking so nervous and all, he would fidget on his seat and throw me quick glances every now and then. Maybe he found out about how I thought of him and yeah it'll be really awkward. He won't even have a chance to do his daily activities whenever I'm around, he would just stay quiet in a corner and only moves when I'm gone.

Such a shame. He's cute and I'm pretty sure his daughter have his beautiful pair of eyes. His long thick lashes. His tall nose. His plump prominent lips. Basically everything. Chaemin would surely grow into a fine beautiful lady with angelic features thanks to him. Well, I'm not saying the mother's not attractive because she's so daaaamn hot. *clears throat* Uh hum. Uh hum. (Oh let it be. She likes it)

Suddenly, I felt someone's gaze at me. I glance at the woman who has her eyelids half-closed, eyeing me intently "What? I'm not checking him out" I rolled my eyes and snickered. Clicking my tongue, I smiled suddenly and waved when Chaemin looks at me.

"Don't even think about it Namjoo-ah" she smiled sweetly, mocking me. Woo! That's scary.

"What are you talking about? I'm not thinking about anything. No, hell I'm not"

"Yeah right" she rolled her eyes then winked at me. Okay, now I'm scared. 

"The guy didn't even talk to me since the very first day" I exclaimed, enough for him and his daughter to hear. Chaemin suddenly laughs and runs to me, hugging my right leg. She had always like it when people raise their voice. Strange kid. 

He, on the other hand, fidget on his seat once again and cleared his throat silently, trying to completely ignore us even though he clearly knows we're talking about him.

"I know, I know" She bobs her head left and right, not believing my words. What the hell man? He's all yours. Go eat him.

I scrunched my nose and stay silent. Yeah, I admit I used to like the guy. USED. You see? Used! I used to check him out. I used to stare at those strong hands and dreamt they would pin me against the wall 'til both my wrists are bruised. I used to dream about his mouth telling me I'm beautiful and y and so damn hot. I used to think about those y luscious lips and how would it feel pressed against mine. OH. MY. GOD. But hell, that was in fifth grade. Can't she let it go? I know we were young and I him in my dreams A LOT but the thing is, it's in the past. I didn't know about cute love, true love, office love, y love, puppy love back then, well maybe a little bit of iness (I was too young I know). I didn't even date until I was 13, that's still pretty young I know I know but whatever, he was my childhood friend and we dated for four years and we didn't do any kind of y things (which I know you es are so familiar with) during those times mind you.

All I'm saying is her husband is hot and oh-my-golly overflowing of iness. (Feelings aside. I mean no harm)

"So Namj..." Jieun silently whispered but loud enough for me to hear. She looked over her shoulder to glance at her husband. Then sighed. Her eyes that were eyeing me suspiciously seconds ago became soft and gentle. I swear this girl could take home so many Oscars Awards for best actress. She's just so damn good. She cleared and continue speaking when she's sure her husband can't hear her anymore "So... Uhm. You know? How was.. Yeah. Uhm... Ah. Nevermind"

After that, she left. I know exactly who she was talking about. I know the girl too well. I know the meaning of her every words and how she feels. I know her every look. Her expressions. The meaning behind each smiles and laughs she make. I know when she's faking it and when she's not. I know the girl for years. I know this woman ever since I had my first tear. 

Her eyes scream a thousand words that only a special few can understand, lucky enough I'm one of them. Her eyes just expresses a little too much without her wanting it. She doesn't need words to say what she really feels because her eyes reveal them for her.

And right now, I know she's not okay.

I know she wants to scream her heart out until all the pain subsides.

I know she just wants to forget it all in order to clear her mind.

I know she's ready to give everything up just so she can finally sleep in peace.

I know she just wants to cry.

I read it all. Her eyes told me.

I sighed heavily and tapped my foot continuously on the floor. I looked at the guy who is still not moving from his seat with his head hung low. Does he plan to be like that until I leave? Hey. I'm not molesting him now. My ert days are over I swear to God.

This is going to be awkward with just the two of us since Jieun carried her daughter with her outside. That's unfair! She doesn't even know if Chaemin wants to go with her. And if she's so worried about her husband with me, why did she leave? I snickered and play with my hair, I'll just try to count how many are they. Ha!

One.

Five. 

Eight. ♥

Twelve. 

Eighteen.

Twenty-two.

Twenty-five.

Tweny...

"Hey" 

I stopped. Tweny-hey? I'm on my twenty-sixth but did this guy just said something. Glancing at him, I raised a brow "This guy says hello, I want to kill myself"

"Should I laugh?" He responded quietly. Ooh~ Is that sarcasm I hear?

"You don't have to if you don't want. No pressure"

"I'm sorry"

What? "Don't take it seriously man. I was just kidding"

"No, not about that"

I raised my eyebrow higher. Now, this is confusing. Why the hell. He's sorry because he's too hot? Well, I remember saying being too y is a crime but I never thought he'd really apologise for that.

"About Jieun and..." He sighs and closes his eyes, not sure if he would continue. Then he breathe out and bit his lip. Oh my holly golly wow! Mother of God. My Guardian Dear. This is too much. Ugh! The feels. 

...And then suddenly, it's fifth grade all over again.

I'm sorry Jieun this is gonna be the last one I swear.

"Namjoo?"

I blinked a few times "Uh yeah?"

"About Jieun and..." Breathes in "...Yongguk"

The mention of both their names made me stiff as rock. I gritted my teeth and look away from him. Squeezing my eyes shut, I breathe in and out. Then I asked what about them? Why is he bringing that up now? That made him silent. Does he even know what to say? 

After a good few minutes, he answers. But it's something I didn't expect. "I think you're disappointed" All of a sudden, why is this all about me?

"I am disappointed!" I snapped back at him in a matter of factly tone, still gritting my teeth.

I don't like where this conversation is going.

I try to calm my hormones, and starts fanning myself. "She chose you Daehyun" Tears are starting to form in my eyes, that's when it hit me. I both love them. I treasured their relationship more than they treasured each other. I am the most affected by it and I hate it. "And it's not your fault"

"I feel guilty"

"You shouldn't. Look, you and Jieun are what matters now. Everything else is in the past"

"You're disappointed" He repeated.

"That's the reason you never talked to me since you and Jieun happened?"

He didn't answer. I heard him breathe in loudly, his head still hung low. His hands clasped together as it leans on his thighs that were in squatted position.

"I'm not even gonna lie to you. Yes, I'm disappointed. Yes, I'm affected by it. But look, it's not your fault. All you did was love her when she couldn't even love herself, when she was broken all in pieces, when she fell down hard on the ground, when her darkest days came and it's not wrong, it's not something you should feel guilty about. You mend her and you helped her stand up again. I understand if you think like that but please don't make yourself suffer with something that isn't your fault. You were there when she needed love the most. She chose you, remember that...

...I know Yongguk is my brother and all and I love him to death and I hate to say this, I really do, but if there's someone to blame it's him. He let go of an important person that he would never have again. You know, I always took my brother's side even if he was wrong but not this time, not for my bestfriend's sake. God, Jieun's an amazing girl...

...Are you feeling guilty because of the length of their relationship? You think ten years is too long? Is that why? You think you ruined it? No! You didn't. Those years were not important, it's just a goddamn number. Maybe they were just too young to know what love is. Maybe it's because they started their relationship early, not minding the consequences. You were there for her when he messed up and that's what important. You waited long enough for her, Daehyun. Can you believe it? Years ago, she was just a girl you had your feelings with. Someone who has a boyfriend. You waited for her and even then you were waiting for your wife"

One by one, my tears fell. I just can't hold it anymore. If I hurt this much, what about Jieun? What about my brother? He's been a mess ever since they split. He got on the wrong road and now he's wasting his life.

"I'm sorry. This is just too much for me. I just thought they would be together 'til the end. That they would do everything with each other. I expected too much that's why I'm so upset with their breakup. I really thought they would last. I thought their story would never end. That one day, when I have my grandkids, I would tell them how my bestfriend and my brother beat everything against them. I looked at their future, not realising that it wasn't even mine. But now, all I know is he let go of someone who would do anything for him, someone who is down for him. So I guess I'm disappointed, but not with you...

...with him"