The Power Of Not Knowing
For the Love of.. Books?For The Love Of.. Books?
Ch.5 The Power Of Not Knowing
By Eiryia
“It's not my fault you choose to dress up like a 50 something Japanese tourist in that bucket hat of yours”
“You’re the one to speak mr. 60 something grandma with a fedora that a real 50 something Japanese tourist just sat on”
“Can't you two get along?”
Seunghoon turned in his seat to look back on them. They were currently on the top of a red double decker bus going around London. Seungyoon had called him the week after Seunghoon had arrived asking if he would mind taking them sightseeing the last weekend of Seunghoon’s stay. He had been hesitant about it at first, but he had promised and he missed Seungyoon a lot even if he never would admit it to his face.
There was a definite change in their relationship after the last night they had spent together. He liked to think it was a positive change, but he still weren’t quite sure about it. The time alone had given time for doubt to grow and he didn’t like it. Another thing he didn’t like was all this damn nagging. Ever since meeting up that morning had they kept on bickering and it was driving him crazy in more than one way. He had managed to let it all pass for now however, but later would he get his revenge.
Revenge, there were many kinds of revenge, but he had a particular one in mind. As the green lush scenery passed in a blur did he slowly begin to plotting his revenge.. How he would push that thin frame of his hard up against the wall, slowly biting his way down his neck before kissing him and then..
“Hello? You still in there!”
Seungyoon waved a hand in front of his face.
"Didn’t you say that we were getting off at the next stop?”
Seungyoon asked grabbing his hand to pull him along with him towards the stairs of the bus. A little embarrassed had he followed along trying to orientate himself to where they were at the moment.
He looked around at the gray cityscape trying to regain his sense of direction. They were heading to some of the biggest sights in the city; Big Ben and the parliament building, London Bridge, London Eye and probably most important of all if he were to judge by Seunghoon and Seungyoon’s reaction: the London Aquarium. They were all situated fairly close together along the Thames and so it would make for a smooth trip on this cloudy spring day.
After a couple more minutes looking around had he spotted the top of Big Ben and they were on their way.
“Look at you two”
Seunghoon said in a light humored voice. Mino didn’t realize right away what he was talking about, since he was too busy looking around. Seungyoon laughed a little however and let go of his hand.
How long had they been holding hands like that? They were in London, no one would care anyway. Mino still felt a little embarrassed but pretended not to be and pointed to the sky telling them to hurry along before it started raining again.
They quickly toured the other attractions before heading towards the aquarium. Seungyoon and Seunghoon were talking excitedly among themselves all the way through the queue and Mino found himself wondering if he really was sightseeing with kids.
His assumptions had been right as they walked around looking at fish and sea creatures. All of them getting more and more excited as they went. Both Seungyoon and Seunghoon had touched the stingrays even if the signs said clearly not to touch them. They had both been giggling about that as they got to the huge tank with sharks, sea turtles and some other really big colorful fish.
They had found a bench and all three had been equally amazed by the mesmerizing view. Mino shifted his attention to Seungyoon after a while. Seungyoon who was staring vide eyed with mouth half open saying whoa each time one of the huge sharks came close. Mino couldn’t help but to be amazed by his enthusiasm.
He looked over at Seunghoon every once in a while as well. Having quickly established that Seunghoon weren’t really any threat to him had he honestly begun to appreciate his company. The fact that Seunghoon and Seungyoon were very close was not hard to notice at all, but as it turned out did Seunghoon have someone waiting for him back home.
Watching him with Seungyoon was actually a lot of fun at times. They seemed to have their own way of communicating and even if it was cute did he have to admit that he was jealous. He hoped that he would be able to understand Seungyoon as well and make him as excited about things as Seunghoon could.
Mino sat lost in thought, reflecting over the past two weeks as the two others watched the fish. The days had passed with only a few text messages as communication between them. He had been hesitant about contacting Seungyoon because he knew he was working. Seungyoon's texts had been sweet however. Telling him how he looked forward to meeting him again after they finished work and how he missed him.
He truly believed they had been working hard the past weeks. He could tell just by judging on how tired they both looked and the strange times the text messages had arrived.
Looking over at Seungyoon could he clearly see the dark circles under his eyes and the blue light from the aquarium made him look even more tired. They must have been working towards some deadline he weren’t aware of all this time. The thought of that was something he secretly was getting more and more scared of: that Seungyoon had reached his deadline and would be leaving him for a long period of time.
The feeling of not knowing and wondering if Seungyoon was keeping something from him was his only reason for wanting to break away from this relationship. Even if just thinking about it made him uncomfortable was it something he had thought about. He loved him that much was he sure of by now. The amount of misery the last two weeks had generated in him had made him wonder if it really was worth it. So far had he been able to push these worries to the back of his mind, but after another two weeks on his own had these worries begun taking up more and more space in his head.
He was at a loss of what to do, their relationship was still very new. Could he be honest? Would Seungyoon understand? He didn’t wish to hurt him or cause him even more to worry about, but he still felt that they needed to talk.
The plan had been to do so today, but after seeing the state he was in, how happy Seungyoon had been to see him and how he had sneakily held his hand at every possible opportunity.
Mino sighed at looked up into the aquarium again. He watched as a particularly frail looking fish swam close to the glass and settled on a reef. That was when one of the bigger fish snatched at its flowing tail. It had spun around snapping at everything close to it in what must have been panic. If fish felt such things. Mino was sure they did. The fish was pretty badly hurt and soon were several other bigger fish gathering around it.
“Oh no”
Went through the crowd watching the tank as the fish got attacked by 5 other fish. Mino felt Seungyoon grab his hand again, squeezing it a little. He heard Seunghoon mumble «at least it went fast» beside Seungyoon while trying not to look at the party the remaining fish were having.
Watching the fish get torn to pieces had put a damper on the mood and they walked around in silence afterwards. Seungyoon was still occasionally grabbing his hand ever so often, but he never held on to it for long. Mino didn’t comment on it, he just squeezed his hand a little every time to show that he was acknowledging his presence.
All his thoughts of breaking things off had vanished during their hours together, but he still felt a need to talk about how everything were affecting him. Maybe there would be time later? If he got the opportunity did he have to make sure to take it and to stay calm while doing so.
They finished their round in the aquarium and went to grab something to eat before their scheduled time to ride the London eye. Seunghoon had been the one to arrange this as a thank you to them for bringing him with them.
Passing the long line to stand in the shorter one had been a relief as the weather was turning bad at record speed again. Mino hoped they would be able to see anything at all as they got up higher. He knew that if the fog and low hanging clouds crept inn on the city as they often did with this weather would they not be able to see much of anything past the Thames.
Luckily enough had a wind appeared as they stepped into their carriage and swept away the worst of the mist. They had been able to enjoy the London City skyline and Mino had to admit it was just as impressive as the last two times he had been there. Both Seungs had stood with faces close to the glass most of the ride, only taking a break to move around to take pictures as the carriage reached the top.
Seunghoon had even taken a picture of Mino and Seungyoon which Seungyoon had sent to his mother just like the first trip they had gone on together. That had probably been one of the highlights of the day so far for Mino; the fact that Seungyoon wanted to show him off to his mother. Even if it was as friends? Did his mother know about their relationship? He had his doubts, but then again Seungyoon never stopped surprising him so he might have told her everything. That was another thing he wanted to ask him about one day.
They had picked up groceries after their little sightseeing trip was over and hurried home through the bad weather. Having booked tickets to watch a musical in the eve
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