This is my first oneshot on this site so it might not be the greatest. *TRIGGER WARNING* THERE IS SUICIDE IN THIS ONESHOT AND ABUSE IS ALSO REFERENCED.

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As Yixing was walking back from the grocery store, he pondered about him, his impeccable beauty, despite his dull, malnourished figure. Every day they would talk about different things such as music or the world cup, every so often he would play his compositions to his unrequited love and he would smile a heavenly smile; he would always ask Yixing questions about himself but they would rarely talk about him. He had a feline quality to him which intrigued Yixing even more, he looked homeless; but Yixing had never asked. He decided on taking a detour to hopefully invite the guy back to his place for the night if he was still there.

As he came to the front of the tower, he scanned the grass in search of his homeless beauty to no avail, he was gone, nothing to indicate he was ever even there. Yixing sighed in defeat; looking up to the sky, only to freeze when he saw a figure on the top of the tower. He dropped the grocery bag and raced to the doors of the tower only to find the doors locked, cursing under his breath and pulled out his cell, dialing 119 with shaky breath and shaky hands. He quickly informed them of what was going on before attempting to converse with the person stood on the edge of the building; his cries ceased when the moon illuminated the figure's face, Yixing's legs gave out when he realised who it was, he choked out a sob.

"I know I've only known you for a small while but... In that small time I've known you, I've fallen in love with you. So please, come down!" Yixing was blabbering aimlessly to him, despite him not being able to hear him.

"Yixing. You were my first joy in many years and my last love."

Suddenly the man let himself fall, triggering a wretched scream from Yixing.

"NO!" his face was soaked with tears as he watched in horror, his eyes were trained to the illuminated man, his bawling was halted by the thudding crunch of his body reaching the grass.

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The numbing wind pushed against Zitao, threatening to push him off the edge he had been stuck to for what felt like years. Zitao had given up years ago; he wasn't even sure why he had held onto his pathetic life so long, he looked up at the stars bitterly; he despised how bright they were able to shine, how effortlessly beautiful they were, when Zitao was struggling to even look decent. He had spent his life being despised by his own family. Even when he thought when he's found happiness, he ended up spending every single day covering up the blue, purple and grey marks decorating his grey skin. He thought about Greg and how he had loved him so much in the beginning; how every night was as stunning as these stars with him. How just like these stars, Greg's love for Zitao burnt out before he had even realised. He thought back to this afternoon when he was speaking to that guy who was even more impeccable than Greg or any star he had ever seen; how close he had gotten to telling the stranger about himself, but held himself back, realising he probably had a pretty girlfriend waiting for him at home. Yixing. That was the name he said to himself.

"Yixing. You were my first joy in many years and my last love."

He closed his bruised eyelids and let his body go. The whipping of the wind felt like home, his eyes shot open to see Yixing, he smiled at the illusion before his body kissed the ground with a thump.

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Yixing was the only person at Zitao's funeral; after identifying his body, Zitao's Mother payed for a basic funeral and went back to China before it even took place.

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Here lies Huang Zitao

Born: May 2 1993

Died: December 6th 2014

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It had been months since he had witnessed the death of  Huang Zitao, and every day, after class he would lock himself in his room playing the song he had wanted to show Zitao the next time he has spoken to him. His neighbours Yifan and Baekhyun had attempted to speak to him, to get him to come out to drink with them but Yixing had just ignored them, occasionally saying he would go next time. He never did.

It continued like this until  one day, Yifan had heard Yixing's voice from inside his apartment,

"It's been a while since you've been here..." silence ensued until Yixing suddenly burst out into laughter, "Of course Zitao, we both know the real reason why you're so busy."

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Yixing was overjoyed when Zitao came to visit him, they would talk about all the things they weren't able to when he was alive.

"Did I ever tell you that you're eyes are the most beautiful I've ever seen in all my life?" Yixing smiled breathily as he lay next to his lover, mesmerised by Tao's heavenliness.

"Every time I come around here XingXing..." he smiled a contented smile, looking into Yixing's eyes as if they were the answer to every single question he had ever needed to ask, like they were his life system, like if he didn't look into them, he wouldn't be able to find his way back here.

"I love you so much." The two said in synch.

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Yifan thought about reffering Yixing to get psychiatric treatment, it wasn't healthy to be talking to someone who's supposed to be dead, and he'd caught him doing it again this morning.

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"Tao, I'm coming to meet you later okay?" Yixing's voice sounded shaky, but overjoyed. "You always come to meet me, but this time I can come to you, okay?" Yifan looked over to see Yixing sat on a bench talking to thin air. "I love you so much Tao, I want to see you more. I don't really have anything here anyway."

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"Hey, how long has it been since you've seen Yixing leave his apartment?" Baekhyun asked casually, letting the coffee brew, it was late but the boys both had assignments they had to work on.

"I think his collegue came round the other day asking for him..." he said cautiously, "Why?"

"He hasen't been coming to class for the past week, I'm just a bit worried is all. He never comes out to drink with us and the boys anymore." Baekhyun grinned cheekily, pouring some coffee out for a rigid Yifan. "Don't be jealous Fan, you're the only one for me." He turned to see his lover's horrified expression. "What? I thought you loved coffee."

"Oh my god, Baekhyun, call 119." Yifan shot out of the apartment and began banging on the door to Yixing's apartment.

"YIXING!" Yifan hollered through the wooden door, "YIXING, OPEN UP!" His fist was stinging from the impact of each loud bang. Neighbours began to come out to see what the trouble was. "YIXING I SWEAR TO GOD OPEN UP THIS DOOR OR I'M BREAKING IN DOWN!" Baekhyun came outside with the landline in this hand,

"What's going on?" Baekhyun cried out, worry etched onto his face.

"I-I think Yixing's in trouble." Yifan replied, "Have you called 119? Do it quickly!" He began breaking the door down as Baekhyun dialled 119. Yifan broke the wooden door down in less than a minute and raced inside, calling out for Yixing. He was racing in and out of the millions of rooms he had. It felt like he was going in circles until he found the bedroom door locked. "YIXING OPEN UP PLEASE!" he begged, "YOU HAVE TOO MANY PEOPLE WHO LOVE YOU TO BE DOING THIS!" Yifan kicked the door in to see the one thing he never thought he would see until tonight. Yixing's limp body was hanging from the ceiling, his neck hanging in a way that was unnatural for a neck to be hanging. Underneath Yixing was a note that read:

I love him too much to let him go. Bury me next to him please.

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Zhang Yixing

Born: October 7 1991

Died: December 6th 2015

"I love him too much to let him go."

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