Minho POV

The question that she asked to me makes me think. I should say anything to her but I just left her alone without saying anything. I didn’t know what to say for her question but I could have said anything. The thing is its not I didn’t know what to say but I also didn’t knew the answer for her question. Her question makes me think.

‘It was not a hard question but why I didn’t knew answer’

I think in my head. Without knowing what to say I just left our house. I sigh heavily and walked to the practice room. As I open the door it was dark inside as it was already passes 11pm in the night. I closed the door and went lied down at the couch without switching the light on. As I close my eyes the memories came back to me.

Hanna, the girl that had changed my life upside down. She was just a normal assistance manager before I confess about my love to her. It started in 2012 when she was introduced by our manager that she is the assistance manager that newly appointed by the company. That was because since our group SHINee had many different schedules among the members one manager couldn’t enough to handle himself.

She was very talented person. She had organized the entire group and individual schedule nicely and we also had more time to practice and also for rest. She was like a sister to us as she was same age as our mankne, Lee Taemin. Day and month passes as we got closer and closer. After few months she had to live with us as we got busy with our comeback. The girl was not so beautiful but has a kind and warm hearted.

She also very known in our company among the other group as she also helps other group as much as she can. She also had a best friend or more to know as ‘twin sisters’ by everyone, Sulli. Yes, f(x) Sulli. They always stick together whenever they met and also the funny thing is their character is the same.

Month passes by and without anyone knowing I started to had felling for her. I never know that I would fall into love after my first love. My first love that left the world leaving me alone. We had love each other and she was the beautiful and kindest girl that I ever seen in this world after my mother. She had died years ago before I had joined this company with SHINee. We had argued about my future that is being a singer. She couldn’t agree that I’ll be going to SM’s audition to be joining as a trainer.

I couldn’t remember how long we had argued about it. It was after that when I had received the news about her death from their parents. They had given to me a box with beautifully wrapped telling that she wanted to gave it to me before but she couldn’t had a chance. Her last wish before she had her last breath was wanted me to precede my dream as a singer.

The box consists of our memories as a couple. Pictures of us, my letters, gifts, many other things that we had shared together as a couple but then a pink strange envelope had caught by my sight that day. The letter that she write before she died. It says...

 

Hello my dear love Choi Minho,

I’m really sorry that I had argued about a small matter. I didn’t know what I had said to you. Jagiya, I’m really sorry that I had said I never love you and the thing that had come out of my mouth that day. Just being heard you wanted to become a singer had broken my heart. Waiting once had hurt me and if it was twice I couldn’t handle it.

You knew that my brother was also on singer once. You never know how the life on an idol but I knew it through him. He became an idol when I was in middle school. The thing is after he debuted he had no time to spend with us. Every single holiday we had been waiting for him and even for my birthday. Time passes as he grew to become world loved idol and still never contacted us or came to find us ever after.

I didn’t want you being ended like him and let me waiting again. I’m really sorry Minho. After this accident I had realize one thing Jagiya. I had loved you more that I, you were my soul mate. I realize that being an idol is your dream and I’ll never stop you. I’m happy for you and I’ll always be by your side.

The doctor that treats me had told me that I will be leaving this world because I had no chance to live anymore. Hearing it I decided to write this letter to you. I wanted to tell you that my death is because of my mistake and careless also don’t ever once think that it your fault. One more thing, always remember that I’ll be always support and protecting you by your side.

Jagiya, promise me one thing. Promise me that you will find a better girl than me. Find a girl that has a nice heart and not to fall for beautiful or y girl.

Jagiya Sarangheo.

With love your first love,

KIM HAN NAH

 

My handphone ringtone had broken my thought. As I held it I saw Sulli’s name and I wondering why she called in the middle of the night. She said she had something to say so I told her to come to practice room and why my wife went there. I keep wondering why but still hearing that she saves was enough for me.

‘Oppa, why are you sitting in the dark? You didn’t know where the switch is?’

Sulli claim before switching the light on.  She came closer and sat down in the floor.

‘Sulli-ah did Hanna told you anything? Is she fine? She didn’t hurt anywhere did she?’

I started to our question on her.

‘Calm down Oppa, One by one. Unni is fine and she didn’t hurt herself. She also didn’t tell me anything but she said she was only stopping by one night. Her word scared me oppa. What actually happened until she had to sneaks out form your house?’

She asked me. I let out a sigh. I woke up and sit up straight.

‘Oppa…’ ‘I also didn’t know what actually happened.’

She looked at me strangely.

‘She asked me the question that I didn’t have answer for now. I didn’t think that were coming.’

She asked what the question was.

‘Why I had chosen her out of many girls out there? Why I choose a girl without any special in her? The reason for our marriage…’

‘That’s it? That was the question? But why you didn’t had answers for that. It was the common question among couples and the answer is very simple. Because you love her’,

she said with a smile in the end. I didn’t think that was the correct answer for her and for me.

‘But that is not the correct answer for me. It was not that. I always had answer for her questions but why i couldn't answer her this time?’

I said sadly.

‘Can I ask you one thing, oppa?’

I nodded. She asked,

‘Do you marry her because of love or sympathy on her?’

‘What?? What are you trying to tell me?’

‘Think about it carefully. The whole company knows that you get marry to her after the incident of unni saved you. She had hurt herself badly after trying to save you from the gangster that wanted to attack you guys. Hanna unni was the bravest girl that I had ever seen, fighting and protecting her loved one in anyway although she knows that she will get hurt by it.’

Her words made me think, was I just sympathy on her, was I just paying back my deeds for her.

‘And one more thing oppa. I shouldn’t tell you but I had no other choice. It’s now or never. Hanna unni is pregnant with your child oppa. She’s’ now carrying your child in her and now in her 3^rd week. Anyway, congratulation oppa. I hope you solve this faster so that I could see my niece or maybe nephew happy with their parents.’

She just said that Hanna was pregnant is she. I almost got a heart attack hearing that.

‘But… How did you…?’

I asked her with a confused look. She just smile and told me that they went to hospital last week together after she got sick almost throwing all that she eaten. Hearing that I looked like a stupid. I didn’t even know my own wife sick and also got pregnant. I sigh heavily.

‘Sulli-ah, can you help me take care of her for one day? I just need some time for myself. I'll come and fetch her tommorrow.’,

‘Of course oppa. I’ll take good care of my sister while you need to sort your mind as soon as possible. I’ll get going. Bye oppa.’

By saying that she left. I didn’t know what I should do now. I lie down again and closed my eyes. She was correct, I should sort this thing or else I would lose my family.

End of Minho POV.