I would like to say Thank you to Rosa (ygwildchild), becasue she was the first person I asked to read this and she's my fave author so she really inspires me to write fanfic hahaha ♥ and we talked about how angst taehoon is bec teahyun is alway angst in jinhoon photos

and to Ajun (shiningpoop), for helping me with some of my grammatical errors, Thank you baby!!

and also to Panda, the mother of all things about lee seunghoon, who is also my taehoon partner, thank you for your sweet violet reaction and sorry  for giving you taehoon angst XD

and lastly i just wanna shout BANANA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

---

It's already past midnight and Taehyun still can't sleep waiting for his dorm mate and best friend Seunghoon. He is constantly checking the time and looked at their photo while listening to a sentimental song.

'Not even a text' he thought and a tear fell while he looking at his phone. He fell asleep crying about how hard it is to love someone who will never know you love him nor giving his love back

When morning came, Taehyun checked Seunghoon's room and saw him sleeping peacefully. He watched him sleeping, he love every part of his gentle face. He wanted to kiss his lips, his cheeks and his eyes but he was scared, scared that he might wake him up and this moment to end. It was his little secret to himself.

When he came back to his senses, he brushed his faces to wake up from daydreaming about him and the guy that he adores, he woke Seunghoon up.

"I'm sorry I came home late" seunghoon's morning voice crack

"I know. Get up now I'll cook breakfast" Taehyun said as he pulled Seunghoon up and walked to the kitchen

Seunghoon just sat down on their dinning table and watched Taehyun cook for him.

He can't think straight he didn't want to ask Seunghoon where he went and who he was with because he already know, he knows he was with someone. He wanted to know who is the person Seunghoon is with, he was curious who makes Seunghoon come home late every night and make him look at his phone every minute. He wanted to know but just picturing him and that person gives him a heartache already.

Taehyun accidentally cut his fingers and Seunghoon ran to him, took his bleeding finger and washed it in a cold running water

"Ya! You should be more careful!" Seunghoon nagged

"I'm- I'm sorry"

Seunghoon took their first aid kit and let Taehyun sit on the dinning chair and took care of Taehyun's wound.

"Be careful next time" seunghoon's delicate voice and action melted taehyun's heart

He loves it when Seunghoon takes care of him. He wants always to be taken care by the older guy. He wants Seunghoon to be concern about him because that's the only way he can also feel that Seunghoon loves him too.

"Thank you. I'll be careful now. Just sit there and I'll cook for us" he said cheerfully and continued cooking

When they were eating they were facing each other and Seunghoon sharing stories about what happened to him yesterday. Taehyun can't get enough and was already full just by looking at Seunghoon's smiles and how he eats well the food that Taehyun made.

"Wah! That's really tasty! You always cook the best breakfast Taehyun" he always love hearing Seunghoon complimenting his cooking, he would always cook for him

"Wait" taehyun left the dinning table and came back handing a medium sized box to Seunghoon "Happy Birthday Lee Seunghoon" he greeted cheerfully

Seunghoon was shocked but he gladly accepted and his reaction is full of exicitement. Taehyun was satisfied by Seunghoon's reaction.

"Wow! Thank you Taehyunie!!" Seunghoon opened the box and it was a snapback but it was just an ordinary one 

"I designed it and personally painted it" Taehyun said shyly

"wow this is really awesome! wow! Seriously thank you so much!" seunghoon stood and hugged Taehyun

Taehyun's heart skipped a beat again. He hugged back. He never wanted to let go Seunghoon.

"You're the best best friend I ever had!" Seunghoon whispered and broke the hug

'Best best friend' his heart broke again hearing those awful word, he never wanted to hear it

"I'll clean this now. You should take a bath now and go to school." Seunghoon said and did as he was told

When he was already to finished and about to go, seunghoon who is seating on their couch called him

"Taehyunie, come home early okay? Seungyoon and the others will come and bring Mino with you. I want my closest friends for this years celebration only" he said warmly to him

"Sure" when Taehyun was about to go again, Seunghoon called his name again

"Whhhy? I'll be late for class" he said annoyingly and Seunghoon laughed at him but his face changed to a gentle smile

"Thank you for the snapback, it's really beautiful. Take care and see you later" the older guys delicate voice and sincere smile melted him and just nodded and walked out of their door

He stayed at their door holding his heart, it couldn't stop racing.

When he was on his way home with mino, they stopped by at a cake shop first and bought Seunghoon a cake.

When they arrived at their apartment, loud musics played, every closest friend of Seunghoon was there. He knew his friends and he get along with everyone of them. They were all having fun talking. He was just happy to see Seunghoon happy and the hat he made looked really great on him. Taehyun would always glance and look for Seunghoon's happy face, he can tell he was happy and having so much fun.

"Hyung your hat looks really awesome! Where did you get it?" Mino asked

Seunghoon leaned and hugged Taehyun surprisingly and boast to everyone "The great Nam Taehyun made it himself! Isn't it beautiful? I really love it! He did so well, I love him for it"

Taehyun felt heaven when Seunghoon said the words 'I love him'

The door bell rings and broke his hug from taehyun and run towards the door

Taehyun was talking with their friends when Seunghoon called everyone and when Taehyun turn around he saw Seunghoon holding hands with a doe eye like guy, they guy was pretty, Taehyun's heart started to feel the ache again but this time it hurts even more, it's pain.

"Guys, I called you all today and as you can see you are all my treasured friends and I want you all to know first about this, coming from my very own mouth about my new love. I wanted to make this birthday more special by introducing to you all the guy who makes me the happiest, my love, my world, my boyfriend, and my future,Kim Jinwoo" Seunghoon and Jinwoo stared at each other with full of love "I hope you guys can treat him like how you first treated me. His my angel." Seunghoon said and announced to everyone

Taehyun can't take it, his heart was broken. But he maintained his posture and tried his best to hide everything.

He watches Seunghoon and Jinwoo never leaving each other's side and how they look at each other, the laughs and the skinships. He watched it thinking that it should have been him on jinwoo's position

After the party, Jinwoo stayed with them. Seunghoon only cared about Jinwoo. Days have past and the more he sees the couple cuddling in front of him makes him mad and cry at night to his sleep. He hates it, sometimes he wanted to just them but he is a coward fool who can't see Seunghoon being angry or sad it breaks him more.

Now that Jinwoo came to the scene, the love he wished for, he has never felt it again, even just a little bit of it. The couple is always together, Taehyun never had his alone time with Seunghoon since they came out.

Taehyun would cry every night into his sleep thinking and regretting that he should have confessed but whenever he wanted to do so he can't find the right words to tell Seunghoon and more over, he was scared, scared that if he do so the friendship that Seunghoon and he had treasured and taken care of for so many years would be like an ash blown in the wind. He could not take it.

 

One morning when he was having a breakfast, seunghoon joined him.

"How are you?" Seunghoon asked with his cup of coffee

Taehyun's heart raced again as he hears Seunghoon's morning voice.

"I'm fine" he couldn't help it, the pain, he finished eating faster "I'm gonna take a bath now, bye"

"Wait Taehyun! Can I ask you a favor?"

He knew it was a favor that he will reject, a first rejection he will make to Seunghoon

He is silently looking at Seunghoon

"I- I wanted to make give Jinwoo something that will match us. Something customized and unique just specially made for us and I just can't think of anyone but you and you know me better than anymore" seunghoon sincerely asked

He looked at Seunghoon's eyes full of love and sincerity. He was weak. When he thought he could reject it, he failed. He was a fool. A fool for Seunghoon.

"Okay, I will do it" Taehyun breakingly said and turned back

"Taehyunie! Thank you very much!" Seunghoon said and hugged the younger one again, Taehyun melted. He missed him so much. He missed Seunghoon hugging him and he was angry, angry at himself because he didn't do anything to own Seunghoon.

Taehyun worked and made the couple a shirt. He made it as if it was him and seunghoon who are the ones that are gonna wear it. It was beautiful. He didn't want to give it to Seunghoon, but Seunghoon saw it already and love it.

Again, he hugged Taehyun so tightly that Taehyun couldn't take it anymore and cried

"Why? What's wrong Taehyun?" Seunghoon panicked

"Can you give me just a little bit of your love? Can you love me? Just a little bit is thats all I am asking for" Taehyun cried which made Seunghoon confused

"What are you talking about, Taehyun? I love you, I'm sure you know that right?" Seunghoon said as he cupped Taehyun's crying face

"I love you, for real and this pain is too much to bear with already. I love you and I'm a fool for you. Can you give just a little bit of your heart?" taehyun confessed, seunghoon let down his hands

"I'm sorry, Taehyun. I love Jinwoo so much. I'm sorry if you've love me and I never noticed it. I'm sorry for hurting you but I can't give you my heart, my whole heart is just for Jinwoo only. He loves me with his whole heart too"

"I can love you better than him, please" Taehyun plead

"I'm sorry" seunghoon lowered his head "Even if you love me better, I'd still choose him over you and over other people in the world. I found love in him, he is all I ever wanted and asked for and I'm going to marry Jinwoo. I'm going to propose to him on Sunday and move in to his apartment tomorrow"

Taehyun was on his knees after hearing what Seunghoon said. He wanted to die at that very moment but he couldn't move. He was in too much pain that he just wanted to forget how to breath.

"Taehyun, I love you and I'm sorry. Please find someone better than me. Someone who will love you back, unlike me. I don't deserve everything of your beautiful heart, it belongs to someone who is more deserving." Seunghoon said and went to his room started packing this belongings

With that Seunghoon left their apartment with everything he owns, but when he tried to say bye to Taehyun but the younger one just locked himself.

On Sunday, Seunghoon invited everyone he and jinwoo loves. Everyone who was part of their love. Taehyun was hesitant but he chooses to go because he was a fool but he needed to.

He witnessed Seunghoon proposing to Jinwoo, the crowd were crying with the couple and celebrating their engagement. He just looked at them and pity himself and never realized that the tears has started to fall again. Seunghoon looked at his way, and smile at him feeling sorry. Taehyun shook his head, smiled and clapped for the couple too.

"I'm happy for you" Taehyun mumbled while looking at Seunghoon kissing Jinwoo tenderly

He left a card for Seunghoon and left the place.

"A TIME CAPSULE

This is where
I began to care
where I was befriended.

This is where 
my soul was bared
where all my rules
were bended.

This is where
a moment we shared
was stolen
and expended. 

Now this is where,
this is where,
this is where
we've ended- 

- Lang Leav

Thank you for everything, Lee Seunghoon. See you on your wedding day. Congratulations."