"I said I'm sorry!" Kris cried out in his sleep for the n^th time that night.

Kris awoke; eyes dilated and his hands gripping the bed sheets, so tense that his bones were ever so defined against his skin and his veins carrying blood so cold, that of ice. Sweat dripped down his forehead as his nose stung every time he inhaled. His pillow was wet and was coldly pressed against his cheek. Tears had reached and dripped down from the bloodshot eyes of which brown orbs looked towards the mirror towards the side of his bed. He stared at his reflection; angry with himself, for being who he was. His lips quivered letting in and out oxygen as his chest rose and fell – he stayed in that position for a couple of minutes.

When he finally reached a point of tranquility, he slowly rose and rubbed his swollen eyes. He could feel the stain of his tears on his face. The reflection he saw in the mirror was not that of him less than a month ago. His eyes drooped and there were evident black circles underlying his eyes. He drew his hand up towards his hair and ruffled through it. His brown hair was fading; he would have to re-dye it soon. Kris sighed and walked towards the kitchen in his apartment.

Kris lived alone. No family. His mom had abandoned him when he was younger. And his dad, was an alcoholic. Kris went to pour tea for himself; it always calmed him down whenever he had an anxiety attack. He had anxiety and many disorders since he was younger, as an effect from an incident in middle school. In a nutshell, after his mother had fled, his father grew angry and took out the anger on Kris. He beat Kris every day for a month before he left as well. Kris then as a middle schooler, moved to Korea and began a new life, however, very shyly, with no one to tend after him.

His father had hit him with a baseball bat. It gave Kris serious head traumas and psychological disorders; which Kris thought had permanently gotten better. At first, he had isolated himself at school and stay in the dark vacant gym during lunch. After a year, he became unable to speak. He forgot how to talk. He grew so lonely he was going to kill himself one day during his senior year. But that day, he met his savior and who he thought; would be his best friend forever; Huang ZiTao, or just Tao who had moved from China to Kris’s school.

Tao, on the first day had gotten lost inside the school, coincidentally walking into the dark gym, where Kris stayed during lunch. Kris didn’t eat much per se, maybe a cracker or two, before falling asleep in the corner. At the time that Tao had walked into the gym, Kris was deeply in his slumber. Tao approached the sleeping figure and tapped his shoulder. Kris awoke suddenly and jerked away covering his head with his arms.

“What do you want?!” Kris screamed in Chinese. Tao backed away from Kris and tried to make light conversation in Chinese; happy that there was someone who spoke his language that would help him.

“Sorry… I got lost on my way to the cafeteria… I was wondering if you could help me find it. Why are you here anyway?” Tao asked Kris. Kris uncovered his face and looked up at Tao who was now crouched down. He saw the panda like features of the kid. He remained silent and diverted his eyes away from the new student.

Tao noticed that it was too late to try and find someone else to help him get to the cafeteria so plopped down next to Kris. He opened his lunch box which had Chinese delicacies in them. Tao, being the childish kid he was, held one up to Kris’s mouth and told him to eat it. Kris did not open his mouth.

“Come on,” Tao tried to persuade Kris, “try it!” Kris looked into the endless depth of Tao’s eyes and saw an assurance of comfort and kindness. He slightly opened his mouth and Tao shoved in the steamed bun. Kris ate it and swallowed it. “It’s good isn’t it?! Isn’t it?!?” Tao exclaimed, looking for Kris’s approval.

Kris smiled slightly for a moment before returning to his usual stoic face. He stared at Tao’s face as the boy continued to eat his food. What was this feeling he had about Tao? Was it something like love? That day, Kris did not know that he would be confessing to Tao one day.

But that confession… had gone terribly wrong…

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Author's note: Hi! ^^ This is my first fanfic. Please read and subscribe and leave feedback! Thank you ^^ I hope you enjoy it~